Looking at the whole slew of unfinished fan fictions I have on this site (and on my google drive), I realized that I have transited a lot. Just as the changes in my username on Twitter and here, I think I have changed quite a bit from 2012 to 2016.

I started really writing fan fictions in 2012 and was really active in 2013. This saw the birth of "Give Me Back My Song" and the completion of some of the other titles. I started shipping GD and CL together probably only in 2012. I read through some of my own author's note then and I wanna gag. At that time, my username was GD_CieL. Kinda obvious that I like both of them. I like SkyDragon. I still like the both of them.

Then I moved back to Korea in 2013. By then, to be honest, I was more in love with CL. In September 2013, I believe I was there for the promotion period of "Missing You". I was also there when CRUSH album came out, was there for all the pre-recordings in Inkigayo and M! Countdown. Went for as many events involving 2NE1 as I could during then. My username changed to unnieya_cl. Both on here and on Twitter. I didn't love GD any less, but I did love CL more. At this stage, I don't really care about GD as much as I do for CL. What about SkyDragon? Am I still into them? I still like them together, but right from the beginning when I went on the SkyDragon ship, I don't have the grand idea of "if I fantasize enough, they will become true." I like their friendship. I don't mind seeing SkyDragon moments. It's fun. But I do not harbour hopes that they would be together.

Mid-year 2014, I moved to China. I started a new job and a new life basically. But being in China also means K-POP haven. I mean I have been to more k-pop concerts/ Korean artists fan-meeting than I ever did when I was in Korea. As long as I have the money for it (which I do with a proper income), there were a lot of events that I went for. I took pictures, and I share them on Twitter. Somehow it felt weird to watermark Lee Soohyuk or Kim Woobin's pictures with 'Unnieya_CL'. So I made the final change to 66illusions.

66illusions is something personal. It represents me instead of which idol I like at that moment in time. Some people on Twitter said that I changed my username on Twitter to be rid of all the controversial tweets I had about the other members of 2NE1. I had people post my pic, set up an anti account, etc. There are some who still dig up tweets I said in 2013. To me, it was a lesson. I do watch what I say now but strangely, people have double-standards about what freedom of speech is on twitter. It's also a good reminder that people on SNS are really just an ID. They know nothing about me. There are some people who I do talk to outside of SNS and these are people I would like to call friends. An ID will just remain as an ID. The number of followers is also just a number.

Anyway. To people who knows me in real life, in a more personal manner, the number '66' means a lot to me. It's my birthday. 6 June. 66. I like how the numbers look like together. 'illusions' is a reminder that everything is illusionary, momentary and can be gone the next moment. It's a reminder to live in the moment, to treasure it even if it's just a moment.

So where do I stand when it comes to SkyDragon? I have no problems writing fan fictions about them because I do like both of them and I like their personality. Will they ever be together, do I want them to end up together, this is not my decision to make. Just because I ship them doesn't mean that I have to force it down their throats. They are human beings with their own mind and likes and dislikes. I'm not delusional. At one point, I was more convinced that they would end up together than now. At the end of the day, it doesn't matter what I think. If they end up together and they are happy with that, I'm glad that 2 good people ended up with each other. If they do not end up together and they find love and happiness with other people, as a fan, all I can do is wish them all the best. I just want the people I like, people who work hard for their dreams to be happy.