my future?

   i dont know if you think its too early to talk about this but ugh, ever since my pt3 results keluar, my parents just CANT stop bugging me. "masuk kelas account.", "tak payah berangan nak masuk science stream" and honestly? its stressing me out. very bad. if you think breaking down EVERY SINGLE TIME people ask you about your ambition isnt bad enough i dont know what is. why would i breakdown? because since i was, idk, 5? ive set this one goal in my mind: I WANT TO BE A DOCTOR. kalau takleh gak aku nak jadi pharmacist. i like science, biology to be exact. my bad la i didnt score THAT well masa pt3, i got a C for science and an E for maths. yes in case you still dont know, I FREAKING HATE MATHS. i just dont like to deal with numbers. and to think that account is all about money?? numbers?? just.. no.

   i cant see myself sitting in an office handling s like that. aku nak jadi doktor psikologi. ataupun psychiatrist. yeah something related to mental, emotion, disorder. its just, hey, thats my interest. tak ke critical whenever kelas account aku ngantuk 24/7 sebab aku tak minat? please, im torn. i cried so much kot masa kat kelas cikgu tanya pasal cita-cita.
 

cikgu: apa cita cita awak?
me: doktor psikologi?
cikgu: tapi awak kat kelas teknik. kenapa taknak mohon sc? result awak apa?
me: parents tak kasi, result saya takde lah ok tapi takdelah teruk sangat. 5A2B2C1E.
cikgu: oh... cari cita cita baru.


   MATEEEEEEE NOOOOO do you know how much that hurts? so freaking much. its like when youve been sticking to this one particular person daripada kecik and you click SO WELL but and then you just gotta move and start over. everything. susah kan? and to think that im the new student as well.. sigh. nak kena fit in dengan new friends, nak fikir pasal benda ni lagi. dah banyak kali slow talk dengan parents but they just wont listen. i dont understand them, just because they're accountant and bank manager doesnt mean their daughter would do the same thing too. no. i am not interested. if you guys agree with my younger bro's decision to become a footballer why cant you agree with mine? am i that hopeless? stupid? what should i do, really? following eveything you said despite my lack of interest? sigh. its my future that you're deciding, without thinking about me. MY FUTURE.

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kookiearmy123 #1
Kau sme dgn aq. Aq nak jadi doktor psikologi tapi disebabkan keadaan sekeliling yg xsetuju dgn cita2 aq. Bila org tanya aq nak jadi ape, aq jwb doktor psikologi.. kau tahu ape reaction diorg. 'Kau nak jge org gile ke??' 'Haha bagusla nnt doktor sme gile dgn pesakit' 'sesuai la dgn personaliti kau yg gile' diorg gelakkan cita2 aq. I like benda yg berkait dgn emosi, depression, disorder, etc. Somehow, smpai ade cg pon gelakkan ape yg aq nak jadi kelak. I hate people yg halang ape aq nak buat. Smpai satu mse tu klau org tnye ape cita2 aq, my answer is...' i dont need an ambition' 'i dont have one' yeahh, pastu sume mrh aq sbb aq jwb mcm tu. Aq start minat bidang tu since last year. Guess what? Waktu aq standard 6. And know aq da mls nak fikir sume bende ni. Teacher aq galakkan aq suruh jadi bussiness women. I hate account. Smpai cg kaunselor pon aq da jumpe. Hina sngt ke pekerjaan tu. Itu ape yg aq minat. Im sorry aq over. Aq xde tempat nak luahkan sume bende ni. Atleast aq jumpe org yg sme posisi, masalah dgn aq :)
sleepingprince #2
Your parents are just worried and concerned . Always remember that they only want the best for you and would always love you no matter what happens. Its not wrong to have your own dreams and ambitions but yet again in order to persue your dream you need to have what it takes like the qualifications and etc.. try talk to your academic counsellor . Stay strong. All the best . Nothing is impossible
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