Ah Decisions...

If I have to describe my year of 2015 with a Kpop song it would be "Up & Down" *starts dancing Hani's part*

but seriously, theres been too many changes for me to cope and there was a point of time when i wanted to just throw my hands up in the air screaming "I QUIT!!! JUST TAKE ME LORD! TAKE ME!!!! I'LL SUPPLY THE SHACKLES BUT I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS NO MORE!" (dramatic i know, but hey, it's me)

I was actually thinking whether or not i should post this blog or not since I do know some of you personally but then I decided that in the end it doesn't matter if you go out there and talk to the suspecting party about it or anything. Why? Because I believe you wouldn't really care or dare since I would know where the source came from, and the contents of it so if you wanna take things outside then fine with me.

SITUATION:

One of the so-called best friends ditches without any specific reason or goodbye and replaces me with a total narcissist. This person ignores my msgs, moves permantently away from the group, doesn't hang out outside school with any of us anymore and pretty much cut ties with all of us. And theres me probably getting the double slap in the face since we were super close and pretty much had that friendship where we thought was unshakeable and made semi plans for the future (which obviously now blown away cos theres no way any of thats gonna happen now.)

But then i get this msg on kakao from this person notifying me about the MAMA Awards and in my head i'm like "Ok... you ignored me for the whole year and heaven forbid you wanna talk to bring up something in which i'm obviously gonna be up to date with and stuff, completely IGNORING my last msg about something important for school.)

So i kinda sit there and be like, do I reply? Or do I not? Cos hell do I NOT wanna be sceenzoned again for another 6 months thank you very much.

But me being me, who doesnt ignore msgs online and having the rep to reply i did so anyway, but the convo was just awkward, maybe cos i wasnt really into it or cos we werent just the same anymore even though the other party might've been trying to make it that way, but idk.

After that i got a notification on fb a few days later asking if i'm avaliable to go to that person's bday party.

And that's when im like "To be, or not to be? To go, or not to go?"

I mean if i go, i know i'll have some regrets. But if I don't go I might have some regrets too? I mean i dont wanna go to an event where i'm going to be bored to my skull or be left out since this person has invited a lot of people in who im close with and not close with, but some of them might end up ditching me as well. (as you can see here, im short of true friends XD)

I haven't replied yet and i can't make a direct decision on which side im really leaning towards to the most.

This person hasnt exactly apologised to me for anything or brought up their reasons for doing what they did, but at the same time idek if this an act to make amends or something. I mean even if it was, im not sure my pressence would be missed since this person has over 8 new people to replace me with.

What do u guys think? Should I go? Or do I nexflix and chill with caramel popcorn and bubble tea?

Comments

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KeysiEys #1 Nov 30, 2015 01:54:30

probably the nexflix and popcorn and bubbletea :DDDD

coz you know, she'd PERSONNALLY walk up to you and apologize (or something) if she really is into getting on good terms with you.

but, meehh, just saying xDD

#Don'tMindMeCozIMishYuuuu

cupiecake #2 Nov 8, 2015 09:56:24

hi aerxia! you might not know me, but i happened to read your blog and i just want to share my thoughts. :)
you know, i think everyone ever had that friendship they thought unshakeable. At least i had, and you had too.
I remember I had a friend at the first year of junior high school.
we often texted each other too and our houses were close, we could play together. and then, the next year we were in different classes.
i thought, i could still come to her class and have lunch together and else but she met new friends and we drifted apart just like that. things gone bad between us. i didn't like her new friends and it turned out almost everyone at school didn't like her gangs. my connection with her were completely got cut off. later, i tried to apologies because i thought it was my fault. i thought it was because i didn't like her friends, i didn't like how she could have fun without me. i realized, i was immature. but even after i apologized and she did too, we didn't get back together like we used to be. it was just awkward.
And as I grew up, i know that some people might just passing through our life. they didn't mean to stay, but they left memories and lessons.

For the invitation, if it was me i would do netflix with caramel popcorn and bubble tea. I prefer being at home rather than going to a party with an invitation from fb. If she sent me like a real invitation i would go, but that's not the case.
But, if you are a party goer, maybe you should go? Maybe you could find some cute boys there. :))

catssss #3 Nov 6, 2015 19:13:52

Although, Netflix and chill with caramel popcorn and bubble tea sound WONDERFUL. I think that after what has happened recently you should go and try to make some new friends, and if you are socially inept like me, try to get someone you already know to introduce you to one of their friends that have similar hobbies. But if you feel stressed by things, which is completely fine, then Netflix it is! We could talk if you want if you ended up not going. Sorry, if this really isn't the type of response you wanted since I didn't give a direct answer, but I hope it helps!