THANKS : 이진현 FOR NOTHING。
CONGRATULATIONS
LEE, JINHYEON
WHY CAN'T YOU SEE YOUR WORTH?
what is the most beautiful moment of your life?
TRAITS. maternal, wise hermit, self-less, generous, nagger, over reacts, obsessive, anxiety, optimist
IN ESSENCE.
"if he was a girl, he'd be a perfect mom in a drama." - jinhyeon is known for his maternal instincts even among his family members, better yet his friends. he has that magic power of being able to find things when you cant, just like a mom. his maternal traits comes out even more if you are injured mentally or physically. however, brace your ears if you are physically hurt as he would nag at you like crazy. a lot of "i warned you about this." and "this is what happens if you don't listen to me." would be coming out of his mouth. he's quite the nagger and it usually lasts for a few hours. if you are mentally injured, he would listen to your concerns and give you imaginative situations of the worst or best case scenario. after watching so many dramas, he's able to imagine these things because dramas are almost reality. jinhyeon is also one of those people who has the ability to throw out a deep life quote naturally in a conversation due to his addiction of dramas. usually, he wouldn't realize this wise hermit coming out until his friend comments on it.
"we're not sure if he's stupid or naive." - jinhyeon is an outright optimist. he believes there is good in everyone and that it depends when that goodness is shown. if you give him a good impression, it'll be hard to scare him off with the bad things that you did. however, despite being an optimist, he doesn't trample on the realists' opinions. it's just that he prefers a happy mood than a serious 'get back to reality' one. but be prepared because jinhyeon being an optimist doesn't stop him from over-reacting when situations involve him or his loved ones. he gets a bit stressed out at these times that someone has to tell him to take a chill pill. it's only because he's such a huge worry rat and he never lets the situation rest until he sees the end to it. even if that means he's going to get hurt for knowing the truth. but the truth usually hurts, so ... yeah. with this being said, jinhyeon is also very self-less. he always puts other people's feelings ahead of his. they're feelings count first because honestly, without his closed ones jinhyeon wouldn't be able to keep up this happy aura he was taught into. this may also make him become obsessive with trying to lay out everything perfectly on the path of others. it's to ensure other's happiness which he believes will lead him to happiness also even if he gets hurt in the process. so long as his closed ones are at peace, he too is at peace.
"but we know he needs us." - what with his obsession with his closed ones' happiness and his self-lessness, he also suffers from anxiety. jinhyeon gets anxious whenever he's left alone. he trembles a bit at the mentioning of goodbyes which is why he becomes clingy towards his closed ones. he's afraid they would get hurt and be gone from his life without him knowing it until it's too late. he follows them around, checks up on them which he procclaims it to be his maternal instincts doing the work when its actually the anxiety that controls him. jinhyeon also has difficulty in letting go of the past. even if he says he's move on, he's only merely forgotten about it and will dwell on it if reminded. despite his dark traits, there's one that his friends enjoy the most and that is his generous trait towards food. jinhyeon is the kind of person who will bring you out to eat whenever you ask him to. he doesn't mind spending money for food. however, he's the worst at giving presents because he doesn't know what style other people like and never cared for to know it.
"if he was a girl, he'd be a perfect mom in a drama." - jinhyeon is known for his maternal instincts even among his family members, better yet his friends. he has that magic power of being able to find things when you cant, just like a mom. his maternal traits comes out even more if you are injured mentally or physically. however, brace your ears if you are physically hurt as he would nag at you like crazy. a lot of "i warned you about this." and "this is what happens if you don't listen to me." would be coming out of his mouth. he's quite the nagger and it usually lasts for a few hours. if you are mentally injured, he would listen to your concerns and give you imaginative situations of the worst or best case scenario. after watching so many dramas, he's able to imagine these things because dramas are almost reality. jinhyeon is also one of those people who has the ability to throw out a deep life quote naturally in a conversation due to his addiction of dramas. usually, he wouldn't realize this wise hermit coming out until his friend comments on it.
"we're not sure if he's stupid or naive." - jinhyeon is an outright optimist. he believes there is good in everyone and that it depends when that goodness is shown. if you give him a good impression, it'll be hard to scare him off with the bad things that you did. however, despite being an optimist, he doesn't trample on the realists' opinions. it's just that he prefers a happy mood than a serious 'get back to reality' one. but be prepared because jinhyeon being an optimist doesn't stop him from over-reacting when situations involve him or his loved ones. he gets a bit stressed out at these times that someone has to tell him to take a chill pill. it's only because he's such a huge worry rat and he never lets the situation rest until he sees the end to it. even if that means he's going to get hurt for knowing the truth. but the truth usually hurts, so ... yeah. with this being said, jinhyeon is also very self-less. he always puts other people's feelings ahead of his. they're feelings count first because honestly, without his closed ones jinhyeon wouldn't be able to keep up this happy aura he was taught into. this may also make him become obsessive with trying to lay out everything perfectly on the path of others. it's to ensure other's happiness which he believes will lead him to happiness also even if he gets hurt in the process. so long as his closed ones are at peace, he too is at peace.
"but we know he needs us." - what with his obsession with his closed ones' happiness and his self-lessness, he also suffers from anxiety. jinhyeon gets anxious whenever he's left alone. he trembles a bit at the mentioning of goodbyes which is why he becomes clingy towards his closed ones. he's afraid they would get hurt and be gone from his life without him knowing it until it's too late. he follows them around, checks up on them which he procclaims it to be his maternal instincts doing the work when its actually the anxiety that controls him. jinhyeon also has difficulty in letting go of the past. even if he says he's move on, he's only merely forgotten about it and will dwell on it if reminded. despite his dark traits, there's one that his friends enjoy the most and that is his generous trait towards food. jinhyeon is the kind of person who will bring you out to eat whenever you ask him to. he doesn't mind spending money for food. however, he's the worst at giving presents because he doesn't know what style other people like and never cared for to know it.
TRIVIA.
• able to drink caffeine because it doesn't affect him. preferably mocha.
• loves ice-cream and chocolate. a secret way to tempt him.
• wants a pet squirrel or a robot like Echo in Earth to Echo
• able to drive and ride a motorcyle. usually rides around in his sports bike.
• has a pet cat named mowgli.
• allergic to dust. his nose would get extremely itchy.
• afraid of lightning. he looks away when he sees one.
• a drama-addict. his genres are vast, he can watch almost anything.
• has a love-hate relationship with horror stories. loves the thrill but hate the nightmares
• does not like needles. he does not like things poking him.
• is very ticklish at his neck and sides. will squirm if someone touches those areas.
• is open to skinship. often times hugs friends when sad but will squirm if touches ticklish areas.
• does not like alcohol and pork. has low tolerance to alcohol. he just doesn't like the meat.
• likes to do photography. he believes that pictures reminds us of the memories better than our brains.
• uses sign language as a secret code language.
• has a secret room full of their photos together. he compiled it from a bit of jaegeun's collection of selfies with the other boys.
• loves ice-cream and chocolate. a secret way to tempt him.
• wants a pet squirrel or a robot like Echo in Earth to Echo
• able to drive and ride a motorcyle. usually rides around in his sports bike.
• has a pet cat named mowgli.
• allergic to dust. his nose would get extremely itchy.
• afraid of lightning. he looks away when he sees one.
• a drama-addict. his genres are vast, he can watch almost anything.
• has a love-hate relationship with horror stories. loves the thrill but hate the nightmares
• does not like needles. he does not like things poking him.
• is very ticklish at his neck and sides. will squirm if someone touches those areas.
• is open to skinship. often times hugs friends when sad but will squirm if touches ticklish areas.
• does not like alcohol and pork. has low tolerance to alcohol. he just doesn't like the meat.
• likes to do photography. he believes that pictures reminds us of the memories better than our brains.
• uses sign language as a secret code language.
• has a secret room full of their photos together. he compiled it from a bit of jaegeun's collection of selfies with the other boys.
ALL THE WORLD IS YOUR STAGE
and all the men and women are merely players at your disposal.
PLOTLINE. EARTH
THEIR BACKSTORY.
"my story isn't one that I like to tell, but if you insist .."
Born as the youngest and only son in the Lee household was like Jinhyeon's ticket in getting embraced and loved in a happy family. He had an of 11 years with his eldest sister and an of 9 years with his second sister. His family lived the lifestyle of an upper-middle class family with his father being a businessman and his mother being a professor. With his parents always busy, Jinhyeon stayed at his grandparent's place a lot in Jongno, near his house. He has little interaction with his parents and thus becomes a bit clingy to his grandparents who served as his parent figure the best they could. It's not that Jinhyeon doesn't see his parents as parents,its just that he knows they're busy is all.
It began when he was to turn 8 years old. That year was one where he saw his parents the most, why? Jinhyeon doesn't know. Well, he didn't until he overheard his parents fighting terribly before his birthday party. The family was gathered in their apartment in Jongno. His sisters had moved out a few years back ( the eldest entered university and the second sister got into a boarding house for school ) so it was a nice sight to see for Jinhyeon who loves his family members, even his grandparents were there. Something had provoked his father causing him to blow out on Jinhyeon who was innocent. His mother stood up for him and his sisters brought him to his room whilst his grandparents tried to calm his parents. In the room, Jinhyeon was given music to listen through with headphones. But Jinhyeon was quick to catch what was going on. His parents were splitting up.
Jinhyeon's school life which was a bit rough before, what with the mild bullying that he experienced in school became a lot more depressing for Jinhyeon who was struggling to keep the happy aura he was raised into and what he was known for. Any mentioning of parents sent him to defensive mode. He was around 9 years old this time, and with the culture shock of experiencing real sadness it was a bit too much for the boy. He became a bit more of a clingy brat to his parents, praying that they wouldn't break up.
After all the court business that went about without Jinhyeon realizing it, his mother moved out of the house. Jinhyeon cried his heart out the night that he realized his mother was never coming back. Fearing that Jinhyeon would turn to depression, his eldest sister took it upon herself to take care of Jinhyeon since his grandparents are a bit too old to care for a 10 year old. ( all the court trials took about 2 years to settle ). Jinhyeon mostly lived with his sister in Icheon with her boyfriend. He only went back to the apartment if he really has to ( like if his sister has to go on MTs ), but even then he'd return to an almost empty apartment aside from his grandparents that now lives there to keep an eye on his father.
During his time staying with his sister, he was acquainted with Jaegeun as his sister's best friend's younger brother whose family was his sister's neighbour. Jinhyeon was in middle school when he was introduced to Jaegeun and often times served as a playmate since their sisters are besties. However, with the between them it served as quite the obstacle for Jinhyeon to get close to him but Jaegeun had caught Jinhyeon's attention. He was different than the others, and Jinhyeon was hoping that his fate wasn't the same as his. With this curiosity, Jinhyeon became Jaegeun's unofficial stalker, always in the dark watching over him. It may be a bit creepy, but Jinhyeon couldn't let his curiosity rest. Everything that happened to Jaegeun, his family and everything else involving him, he knows. Even if Jaegeun doesn't know that he knows.
THE PRESENT.
"i tell myself not to get stuck in the past or else you cant see the future.
but here i am, stuck and unable to move on."
Jinhyeon is now 24 years old and currently studying corporate communication at a local university. He's also working part-time at kidzania. He lives in an apartment in Gangnam bought by his parents as his sister demanded them to for scarring him. The bills are covered by his salary from kidzania since they pay quite a lot. He gets around in his superbike, a gift by his family relatives. Since he lives alone, he drags the boys to crash his place at times.
Jinhyeon had developed an anxiety disorder where he fears people leaving him or being left alone for so long. Even if he's the one that usually lends a shoulder to others, there are times he needs someone else's shoulder to hold on to, especially the week of his parent's divorce date and jaegeun's birthday along with his death anniversary.
AND THE FUTURE.
"hope is a dangerous thing to hold on to, isn't it?"
Jinhyeon imagines the future a lot. He hopes in the future, he could finally let go of his past and overcome his anxiety disorder. There's only so much time that the boys can spend with him right? A scene that certainly plays in his mind is when the boys gather together at a vacation home somewhere in the winter. He would be there with his significant other, and his son may be playing with the boys. They would be drinking hot chocolate around the fire place, thinking back of the memories. Jinhyeon would have been someone in the busiiness communication industry and the boys would probably be happy with their lives too. Yup, everyone would be well and happy. Well, everyone except Jaegeun.
IF THE SUNLIGHT COVERS US, IT'LL MELT
sunshine is over me she gets over me, make us feel alive.
THE FLOWER BOYS.
• FIRE : they are not as close as he is to others, with his temper, jinhyeon tries his best to keep a calm composure. jinhyeon is always ready for the consequences of when someone provokes him. however, most of his thrills are with FIRE. only with FIRE is he brave to do something out of his league.
• WIND : jinhyeon probably has his maternal instincts activated because of WIND. with his youth still rich in veins, jinhyeon only wants him to spend it on happy memories as his did once upon a time ago. he wants to baby him to the point it might be annoying. WIND is the one that usually gets jinhyeon's vote in making a decision.
• WATER : jinhyeon trusts WATER the most out of the four. however, maybe not right away. there are many times when jinhyeon doubts his decision but eventually comes around to follow him because he knows that everything WATER does, there is a reason. jinhyeon doesn't back down when trying to control WATER's harsh comments on the others, bluntly stating out how harsh it was and asking him to apologize if it was too harsh for the other's mentality.
• ETHER : he is probably number one on jinhyeon's nagging list. with his clumsiness, he is the one that jinhyeon looks after the most. he's always around ETHER, ready to catch him if he falls. despite nagging, jinhyeon is most genuine patient with ETHER. having that heart on his sleeve, jinhyeon worries it might get dirty with the reality of the world. so when it comes to explaining life, he tries to put in interpretions that ETHER would understand. innocence is something precious, and he often fears that he might taint it with his imaginative situations..
WHO WAS JAEGEUN TO YOU.
"Jaegeun? He's a butterfly-like person for me,
no matter how cheesy it sounds."
no matter how cheesy it sounds."
He was supposed to be his sister's best friend's younger brother that Jinhyeon was supposed to look after whenever the sister was away or something. That was it. At least, that was what Jinhyeon thought for the first few months they spent together. It wasn't that easy being friends with someone youner than you by 4 years back then with his family situation messed up but they managed to grow a bit closer as time went on.
Before Jaegeun's death, they were on a hyung-dongsaeng relationship. Except, where usually the dongsaeng follows the hyung around, it is Jinhyeon who follows Jaegeun around. It was to an extent that Jaegeun's schoolmates brought rumors around that Jaegeun has a lover but Jinhyeon cleared it up that they were best friends which eventually everyone drops it. Everywhere Jaegeun is, Jinhyeon would be there if you look hard enough. Jinhyeon thought that the rumors hurt Jaegeun and so kept a bit of distance which was placing a tracking app on Jaegeun's phone so that Jinhyeon knows where he is at every waking moment. Which Jinhyeon admits, was quite extreme.
Jaegeun's death took a toll on Jinhyeon that for some time, he became a bit dellusional. Jinhyeon traced back to everywhere Jaegeun went to figure out where he died or how he died at least. His sister brought him in for some pyschiatric help from a specialist to treat Jinhyeon's slight disorder. She was worried that Jinhyeon might hurt himself or others if left alone. Despite all the appointments, Jinhyeon still hasnt been able to get over his death but decides to try and get his together for the sake of others.
"I just wish I could've caught him when he fell,
maybe his wings wouldn't have broke and maybe ..."
OTHER RELATIONSHIPS.
• ELDEST SISTER : Lee Jane / 35 / Psychiatrist / possessive, organized, patient / he is the closest to her after their parents split. His sister was studying medical when his parents split and she helped Jinhyeon a lot to cure any potential depression. Jinhyeon is forever grateful for her. She is one of the many reasons Jinhyeon didn't put a knife to his neck.
TONIGHT, I'M AFRAID OF THE DARK
my life is a perfect graveyard of buried hopes.
THE QUESTIONAIRE.
WHAT DOES HAPPINESS MEAN TO YOU? :
*clears throat and leans back a bit on his chair.* well, happiness for me, is merely having my friends around me. there was a saying that constantly reminded me of them. it went something like, "as long as we're together, we can smile.". I take that saying to heart and makes sure it comes to reality.
*clears throat and leans back a bit on his chair.* well, happiness for me, is merely having my friends around me. there was a saying that constantly reminded me of them. it went something like, "as long as we're together, we can smile.". I take that saying to heart and makes sure it comes to reality.
WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO GO ON THIS ROADTRIP? :
I was studying in the library when WIND called me up, talking about this roadtrip that supposedly we planned a few days before. I'm not even sure if I was there during the discussion it's a blur to me. I was asked to be the driver even though all of them knew how my driving becomes when it gets long distance, but maybe because it was too late of a notice and i had a car big enough for all of us. 'A planned but almost spotaneous roadtrip with friends, why not?' those were my thoughts when I was packing some clothes. It's not everyday we go on a roadtrip.
I was studying in the library when WIND called me up, talking about this roadtrip that supposedly we planned a few days before. I'm not even sure if I was there during the discussion it's a blur to me. I was asked to be the driver even though all of them knew how my driving becomes when it gets long distance, but maybe because it was too late of a notice and i had a car big enough for all of us. 'A planned but almost spotaneous roadtrip with friends, why not?' those were my thoughts when I was packing some clothes. It's not everyday we go on a roadtrip.
HOW DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN TEN YEARS : Are you happy and successful?
I see myself with a significant other, god knows why they would love me. But I don't know, I see myself married and some of the guys might also be married. We might have kids. I would have ran a cafe business where we would hold monthly meetings or something just to catch up on things.
BUT ARE YOU TRULY HAPPY? : .
I don't know. I'm more like in between. I don't think I'm truly happy but I'm definitely happy enough to not fake it. Happiness became a habit and an essence of my life that without it, I may just feel empty.
I don't know. I'm more like in between. I don't think I'm truly happy but I'm definitely happy enough to not fake it. Happiness became a habit and an essence of my life that without it, I may just feel empty.
USERNAME. -exciting
ALIAS. azzalea
ACTIVITY LEVEL. two out of five until december
COMMENTS/QUESTIONS/CONCERNS.
1. i hope you enjoy the gifs i left around.
2. i shall ask more later.
1. i hope you enjoy the gifs i left around.
2. i shall ask more later.
SCENE REQUESTS.
1. sleep under the stars.
2. barbeque.
3. i shall add more when inspiration comes.
1. sleep under the stars.
2. barbeque.
3. i shall add more when inspiration comes.
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