I was the type that gets tired of a bias easily. And I never knew that I could love and cry for a bias but here I am now. Kim Jaejoong has been my bias for 4 years now and I told myself not to cry when he enlists but I am crying uncontrollable tears right now. I dislike the fact that I love him somuch because I don't want to be one of his delusional fangirls but I am. It amazes me how much I can love someone who does not even know I exist. I guess a lot of you girls (and guys) know my pain. It's hard knowing we won't see our precious Jaejoong for 2 years. I will miss him so much. I will miss the tweets and Instagram posts here and there because those posts manage to brighten my crappy day. My heart aches so much and I cannot stop crying. I have only watched one fancam from his concert last night because I can't stand seeing him cry. It has been hurting me.

I admire his other fans out there, you guys are amazing for being strong. And for loving him maybe more than I do. Let's hope and pray for the best for his future. Let's look forward to the day he gets out of army okay?

I WILL MISS HIM SO MUCH. I am trying to contain myself from wailing.