Epilogue
Beautiful Sadness
Please, do read the author's note at the end :)
Mark has never been this thankful throughout his life. Waking up in the morning; feeling refreshed, eager to start another new day; he never felt like that before. He has been wondering for few years if he could change the way he lived, but everything has been answered by God today and he’s very, very thankful for that. Went through a ty life for few years had him laughing whenever he remembered back about it. Cutting himself and left the scars on every part of his body was the tiest thing that he has ever done. Sometimes, he even wondered where did he got the idea of leaving scars on every parts of his body and most of the times, he would muttered to himself for being such a stupid person.
Shifting his position on the bed, he brought his arms up on the air, looking at the scars on his milky arms which took such a long time to vanish. A small smile spread across his face as he still could feel the warmth of Jackson’s lips touched his scars from this morning. If still being alive and still having his parents besides him after what he has went through was the first and the second thing that he’s thankful for, having Jackson as a part of his life was the third thing that he’s very, very thankful for. If someone asked him what did he wants in his life, he would answer that person that he only wants his parents and Jackson to be with him until the end of his life. Being with them makes him happy and that’s all he wanted in his life. He doesn’t need to think of anything else when he was with him and that makes him happy.
He finally learned that not everything can make you happy, except that you were the one who decides that if you found something or someone, or several people who made you feel truly happy with, then, that it is. It’s simple as that.
“Mark,” a soft knock on the door snapped him into reality, “Jackson’s here. Are you sleeping?”
Mark glanced at the clock and immediately got off from the bed. He has been staying in the bed for few hours since he woke up from his nap. Today is Saturday. Saturday means he’s off from work meanwhile Jackson is not. It has been year and a half since both of them graduated from school and Mark, who doesn’t like to be a burden to his mom and dad, decided to do a part-time job at the small book shop in the town. He got a job few months earlier than Jackson since Jackson had to deal with his application entering in one of the national universities in Hong Kong.
When Jackson told him about it for the first time, Mark could feel that his heart shattered into pieces and he even thought that there was no way to put the pieces back in one again but when Jackson grabbed his hand and softly intertwined their fingers together, he knew that Jackson had to go even if his heart says no. And he knew that he had to let Jackson go eventhough he doesn’t want to.
He quickly made his way to the door and when it’s opened, he throws himself on Jackson who doesn’t expect a sudden hug from Mark is coming. They would fell on the floor if Jackson didn’t quickly stabilize himself. It doesn’t take much time for Jackson to have his arms around Mark’s slender waist. Mark broke into a grin when Jackson had his arms wrapped around his waist.
“I was away only for a week and you’re hugging me like you haven’t see me since we’ve graduated from school,” Jackson said followed with laughter, “And what’s this thick feeling when I hug you, Mark? You’re getting fatter?”
Instead of answering, Mark pushes Jackson away with a pout and crossed his arms. Jackson chuckled before pulling Mark into a hug again. After few seconds, Mark pulls away and drags Jackson into his room. He sat on the bed and Jackson followed him and took his seat next to Mark.
“How was Hong Kong?” Mark started the conversation after few seconds of silence, “Did you have fun?”
Jackson had gone to Hong Kong for a week for a small reunion with his friends from national fencing team that he was in when he was in the middle school. Mark didn’t know about Jackson and fencing until Jackson told him about it. Mark wasn’t surprised because he knows very well that Jackson could do so many things and he’s very talented at some things.
“Yeah,” Jackson nodded, “They knew that I’ll be going to one of the universities in Hong Kong,”
“They did? What did they say?”
Jackson shrugged, “They just invited me to join the fencing team once again if my application in one of the universities got approval,”
“Oh,” was the only thing Mark could answer. He didn’t know what should he react to it since he doesn’t have the right to tell Jackson not to do that, or do that, do this, do not do this and stuffs. He doesn’t have the right to tell Jackson what Jackson has to do for his future. He could only give his support to Jackson, “You’ll do well, Jackson,”
Jackson looks up and his eyes landed on Mark, “Thank you, Mark,”
“It’s not a problem at all,” Mark flashes a smile which made Jackson feel at ease, “I’ll be supporting you from all sides and you shouldn’t worry too much, alright?”
The latter then broke into a small smile, it doesn’t contain of happiness or anything. It was just a small smile with a hint of sadness and worries. “I wish I could bring you there with me,”
Jackson’s words made the smile on Mark’s face disappeared, only then he tried his best to create the smile on his face again since he knew if he had a sad expression on his face, Jackson wouldn’t be able to go.
“You don’t have to worry about me, Jackson,” Mark softly placed his hand on Jackson’s, “I’ll do well here so you have to promise me that you’ll do well there and come back soon, okay?”
Jackson didn’t respond but instead he pulls Mark into a hug, gave a kiss on Mark’s shoulder before he buried his face in the crook of Mark’s neck, “Hey, Mark,”
“Hmm?”
“Will you keep a promise as well?”
“Gladly,” Mark smiled, “What is it, Jackson?”
Jackson pulls away and landed his eyes on Mark; letting his eyes wandering over Mark’s face. Mark could feel the blood crept up onto his face but he didn’t look away.
“Will you wait for me even I took few years to come back here again?”
“I will,”
“Will you take care of yourself like how I took care of you?”
“I will,” Mark said with a smile.
“Will you not let yourself involved in depression again?”
“I will, Jackson,” Mark chuckles, “You’re worrying a lo—“
“Will you marry me after I come back here once I’ve finished my studies?”
Mark froze. He didn’t see that coming at all. He thought that Jackson was worrying about him being alone too much but he didn’t expect that coming at all. He never thought of Jackson proposing him one day. He never thought once of marrying Jackson. Sure, he does love Jackson very much but the thought of him marrying Jackson in the future had never once crossed his mind. So when Jackson suddenly proposed him, he doesn’t know what should he react.
Seeing how surprised Mark is, Jackson smiles. He casually brought up his hand and placed in on Mark’s cheek; brushing his thumb on the soft surface, “You don’t have to answer me now, Mark. I won’t force you to answer it today. Just, take your time and think about it carefully, alright?”
Jackson stood up from the bed. He wanted to give Mark some space after what he has asked just now. But before he could make his first step, Mark tugged his shirt.
“I—I’ll be waiting for you no matter how many years you took to come back here again, I’ll take care of myself just like the way you took care of me when I was hurting back then, and I’ll definitely won’t let myself involve in depression just like how I did back then. And—“
Jackson turns his head to look at Mark.
“Please do come back here safely and— propose to me once again,”
Before Mark could look up, Jackson cupped Mark’s cheeks and captures Mark’s lips with his – sealing their promises with a kiss. It doesn’t took Mark much time before he broke into a smile in the kiss and brings Jackson closer as he wraps his arms around Jackson’s neck.
The story has finally come to the end. I would like to thank all of you, the upvoters, the commenters, the subscribers; thank you very, very much for giving so much support to me until the end of this story. This is actually my first time completed a story and the reason behind this completed story is you guys. Especially the loyal commenters and the upvoters. You guys are really rock, though. You kept expressing what you feel about each chapter and kept thanking me in every chapters and that is the only reason why I'm writing for you guys. I'm glad to know that you guys actually satisfied and liking my stories. Thank you very, very much. You guys are truly rocking it <3
Secondly, this story is my first baby and I really thought that this story won't get much attention and I do thought of deleting this story if this story didn;t get much attention but, wow, you guys proved me wrong. All the comments in the comment box made me really happy whenever I read it. And all of the upvotes too, wow, I never thought of getting that much upvote on this story but, damn guys, you're rocking it <3
Thank you so much guys for still staying with me till the end of this story. I'm sorry that the last chapter took me so long to update since I kinda went through the writer's block time for awhile and today, I'm very happy that I could finally update the last chapter of this story. Last but not least, once again, thank you so much to the loyal subscribers, commenters and the upvoters for staying with me till the end and keep showing your loves to this story till the end. Thank you so much! You guys are rocking it <3
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