You met Jongdae at a café you were working at. You didn’t really take notice of him at first until you came near his table to clean up the crumbs on the floor and you heard a loud crash of a plate. You looked up to find said boy, redden in embarrassment and his friends trying to hide their laughter. You approached his table to clean the mess only to have him be a stuttering mess to blame the broken plate on his friends.

 

“T-that wasn’t me, it was their idea!” You let out a small laugh and told him it was alright before quickly sweeping up the broken pieces. After you finished and left to go back to the cash register, you heard his friends breaking out into a loud laughter.

 

“See! Now she notices you Jongdae,” his friend said in a hushed tone while giving a high five to the other laughing boy.

 

----

 

You started seeing more of the Jongdae boy, you wondered if he went to the café before the incident because there was no way you would’ve missed a handsome guy like him.. He seemed shy at first, but the more he talked to you, the more comfortable he was around you. He would sit at the same spot near the window so he can observe people who passed by. You soon found yourself starting to take a liking for him. One time, after you finished cleaning the countertops, with little customers coming in, you decided to sneak glances at him. It’s not your fault right? Who wouldn’t look at a beauty when it was right in front of them? You saw how sharp and beautiful his jaw line was, how beautiful his lips looked when he was smiling while looking outside, how beautiful his eyes- You looked down immediately when you realized he caught you staring. You quickly grabbed a towel and cleaned the already clean countertops to try to avoid the awkward tension, only to have Jongdae standing right in front of you.

 

“Hi,” you let out softly, giving an awkward grin.

 

“Hi,” he replied, smiling the smile you learned to love, “I uh never really had the chance to have a full conversation with you, you’re always so busy. And I always wanted to ask you this, but I never really had the courage to, but something today tells me you might say yes,” he gave a slight grin, “would you like to go on a date with me?”

 

And that was how your relationship with Jongdae began, everything was perfect until he started leaving for work earlier and leaving work even later. You knew his job as an idol was tiring, but his job as an idol was what made you guys become strangers. When was the last time you had a date with him? You couldn’t even remember yourself. You got fed up with it. You loved him; you really did, but was it hard to give your own girlfriend the love she deserves? The love you deserve?

 

Today you decided to leave the house and give yourself free time. You had a job yourself and you rarely did anything for yourself because you were so damn busy trying to please your boyfriend only to get nothing in return. You went out to get your nails did and to dye your hair the color you’ve been wanting since forever. It felt good to do something for yourself; you’ve been neglecting the care you needed. You came home a little later than expected, okay, a lot later, you decided to catch up with a few friends you haven’t talked to since college. Needless to say, you felt great about yourself, this day was much needed, and you couldn’t believe how long it took for you to give yourself a “me day”.

 

But your mood started to fall when you opened the door to your house. You saw Jongdae sitting at the dinner table, head hanging low. You were worried, was he sick? Did something happen at work?

 

“Jongdae?” you asked hesitantly as you neared him.

 

“Where were you?” He answered in a monotoned voice. He was mad.

 

“I went out with a couple of friends” you said. Your worries disappeared as you realized you and him were going to fight again.

 

Jongdae looked up at you, scowling. “I worked hard all day and you went out with your friends?” You were in disbelief, the only day you had to yourself, he got angry.

 

“What do you expect Chen?” The name rolled off your tongue oddly, but you didn’t feel right calling him Jongdae, you didn’t know who he was anymore, “you expect me to wait for you at home? You expect me to do everything for you? Well I’m tried!”

 

“If you’re tired then why don’t you just leave!” he shouted, “I don’t need you to stay, I don’t need you!” Your eyes widened in disbelief, “Fine! I should’ve left you long time ago.” You quickly picked up your keys and slammed the front door shut to drive off to your friend’s house.

 

Jongdae was angry. This was not how he planned it to go. He knew he has been neglecting you; he was waiting for you to come home to tell you he had a few weeks off and that you guys can finally spend time together.

 

It hadn’t really hit him that he lost you, until he called your phone to tell you to return home so you guys can talk calmly. But you didn’t pick up; you didn’t pick up his ten phone calls. Jongdae started panicking; this isn’t how your relationship is going to end right? He walked around the house, biting his fingernails thinking of how to make it up to you. He was in distress. He shouldn’t have told you he didn’t need you, in fact, he needed you so much he was scared he might lose you. You were usually at home waiting for him after practice and when he saw an empty house, he thought you had enough of him and left him for another man. He loved you, but the stress from his career was getting to him and he just needed space from everyone.

 

Jongdae decided to take a quiet walk to cool down and to figure out the apology he was going to tell you. He ended up at the park you two frequented during your early months together. He let out a small smile when he remembered himself teaching you how to skip rock, and how cute you looked when you were frustrated that the rocks kept sinking instead of skipping. He sat down on a bench to just take in the surroundings. He never had time alone like this, work was keeping him busy, but he couldn’t help but not feeling satisfied without you next to him. He started looking at other park goers. Jongdae enjoyed people watching, he enjoyed the idea of how everyone has their own story to share, how everyone had a different life going on, how everyone had their own problems going on.

 

His eyes stopped on a particular couple, he couldn’t help but feel guilty when he saw the love in the guy’s eyes when he looked at his partner. Jongdae hasn’t recently told you how much he loved you and how much you really meant to him. ‘I’m the worst boyfriend ever. If I can even call myself her boyfriend,’ he told himself. Jongdae averted his eyes from the couple and thought hard about you two. All he did was hold you back. You would probably find more happiness with another guy who would give you all his love to you that you deserved. Jongdae decided to finally let you go.

 

----

 

You woke up at the middle of the night to the sound of a text. You looked over at your friend to make sure you didn’t wake her up as you unlocked your phone to see a text from Chen,

“I’m sorry. I want you to know that I love you. I guess I didn’t show that well enough huh? I think it’s best if we went separate ways [Y/N].” You immediately deleted the text. You were hurt he would leave you just like that, if he loved you, he wouldn’t have let you go. That night you slept with a broken heart that was shattered even more.

 

----

 

After your break up with Chen, you tried to live out your life normally, not wanting your broken heart to take over. You decided to officially move in with your friend. After work, you came over to the house you and Jongdae once shared when you were sure he was at practice to pick up all of your belongings. When you entered the house, you were in shock; the house was a complete mess. You honestly wanted to tidy the house up, but you remembered Chen saying he didn’t need you anymore, so you quickly went to you room to pack all of your belongings.

 

Everything became different to you after your break up. Dating wasn’t the same, you went out on dates with a few guys, but none of them were right for you. You even tried to force yourself to like this one guy, but you couldn’t bring yourself to it. You decided staying single for a while will be better for you than forcing yourself to be happy in a relationship you didn’t wanted.

 

You also decided to quit working at the café where you met Chen at because everything about that place reminded you of him. Your friend told you to work at a place where you wouldn’t be reminded of Chen so you could get over your break up even quicker. She offered you to work at a restaurant she was managing and you were so much happier. The restaurant was livelier and upbeat that you felt like you could finally get over him.

 

----

 

Jongdae went out with his band mates to have a guys’ night out, he wanted to stay home because he wasn’t in the mood to go out, but the look on his friends’ faces made him change his mind. When Jongdae entered the restaurant, he heard loud chatter and he groaned in frustration. He did not want to be around loud people tonight. His band mates were all talking about an upcoming concert, but all he could do was zone out and observe everyone there. And that was when he set eyes on a beautiful figure. He almost didn’t recognize you with a different colored hair, but there you were, smiling widely at the customers you were serving. And there he realized he had fallen for you all over again. He thought he had lost you when he went to your old café to see you again, but when the manager told him you quit, he was devastated, but here you were, looking even more beautiful.

 

Jongdae saw you approach his table and he quickly hid behind the menu, pretending to decide what to order.

 

“Hi, I’m [Y/N], I’ll be serving you all today, what can I get for you guys?” You asked, your voice wavered when you recognized two of the guys as Chen’s friends the first day you met him. You got everyone’s drinks down until you got to the guy with the menu hiding his face. You knew it was definitely Chen hiding behind the menu.

 

“And you sir?” You asked, hoping not to stutter when you talk to him. He awkwardly put down his menu slowly and said he just wanted a glass of water. He looked at your eyes and was saddened when you couldn’t make direct eye contact with him. You jotted down the water and told everyone you’ll be right back with their drinks. You walked quickly to the bathroom to calm yourself down. “You’re already over him! Do not fall for him again, all that hard work getting rid of your feelings would be for nothing,” you reminded yourself and you splashed your face with cold water.

 

You returned to their tables with their drinks and you put down each drinks individually with a smile on your face to prove to Chen you were doing fine without him. But when you went to give him his water, you accidentally dropped the glass when you felt someone bump into you from behind.

 

“I am so sorry!” You spluttered as you tried to pick up the broken glass pieces and wipe the table dry.

 

“[Y/N] don’t do that,” you heard him speak quickly trying to stop you, “you’ll cut yourself!” You let in a sharp intake of breath as you felt a piece of glass prick your finger. Your coworker came by to assist you, “I’ll take it from here [Y/N], go get cleaned up” the waiter said. You nodded a thanks before going outside to get a fresh breath of air. You sat on the ground; your head buried in your hands, crying about how weak you were, how weak you were when you were around Chen. You heard someone sit besides you, but you were too busy crying to look at what idiot would sit besides you when you obviously needed time alone.

 

“[Y/N]?” you heard him ask softly. You knew it was Chen and you closed your eyes shut.

 

“[Y/N], please let me bandage your hand, you’re bleeding,” he whispered when you didn’t reply to him.

 

“Go away Chen,” you said, voice quivering in the process.

 

“I can’t [Y/N], can’t you see? I tried to leave you, but everything I think of, you’re always on my mind. I can’t leave. I thought I was doing fine without you. I tried to be strong, but I can’t. I need you [Y/N].” Chen’s voice died down near the end of the sentence. You couldn’t bear to look up at him, in fear you would start crying again if you were to see the look on his face.

 

“I- I hate how you can’t even look at me anymore,” Chen spoke quietly to break the silence.

 

“How do you expect me to look at you so easily?” You looked at him angrily, but softened when you realized he was tearing up, “You hurt me Chen, I can’t stand to look at you when I know if I take one more glance at you, I’ll fall in love with you all over again and I can’t handle that.” Jongdae looked at you in pain and reached over to hug you tight. You let out a sob as you grabbed a hold of his shirt. You forgot how safe you felt in Jongdae’s arms.

 

“I know my priorities now [Y/N], I was such a fool to let go of you so easily like that. I thought I was helping you by letting you go, but all I did was hurt you. I’m so sorry.” Jongdae soothed your back as he whispered you his apologies, “I promise to never make you feel unwanted, unneeded, unloved. I’ll give my all to you, [Y/N]. I promise.”

 

You nodded your head in approval and Jongdae released you from his hold. You looked down so he wouldn’t see your tear stained face. He tilted your face up to see you clearly and chuckled when you tried to avoid his gaze causing you to smile because it has been so long since you genuinely seen Jongdae happy. Jongdae wiped his tears with the back of his hands before reaching to your face to gently wipe away your tears.

 

“Come on, let’s get your boo boo cleaned up,” Jongdae stood up and extended his hand to help you up. You laughed at his silliness and he remembers the reason why he fell in love with you in the first place.

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Hello everyone ^^~ Follow me on tumblr Oh--kai If you would like! I'm not so satisfied with this story tbh, I think I might change some things around tomorrow if I can figure out why I'm not digging it. But as always, thank you for reading :) please leave a comment if you  think there's anything for me to work on! I love you all! WOO