The One
Requested By: tattoo_wallflower
Reviewer: -theunniefangirl
Review Requested: August 2nd, 2015
Review Completed & Posted: August 4th
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Here it is! Sorry for the wait <3 

Title (6/10)
The title isn't something that catches your eye automatically. It isn't really something that would make the reader interested and click on it. I do see how it relates to the story without revealing everything about it.

Foreword (9/15)
The foreward is very meh. There is only one line on the description and no colors to catch the reader's eye. If you don't really have a description to add, at least add some colors or fonts. ^^

Characters (16/20)
The characters aren't really unique. While you were able to give them emotions that added onto well to the story, there isn't anything unique about them from the average angst fic. 

 There is always the dark and unemotional one in the relationship and another who is outgoing and cheerful then one dies- usually the cheerful one. 

Narrative Elements (20/30)
I found barely anything wrong with your writing. Your tenses were PERFECT. You But what definitely needs to be checked on is the konglish.

 Since this is set in South Korea- where they speak Korean- I'm pretty sure konglish isn't really needed. For example- here is what you wrote:

 "Yoojin unnie and I have to leave now, okay? We'll visit you soon Oppa. Saranghae."

 I understand why you had to write the romanized version of "oppa", but why "saranghae"? If they're speaking Korean and you translate it to English nothing but a few phrases (basically oppa, noona, unnie, and hyung) should be romanized. Instead of putting "saranghae" why not just put "I love you"? You might as well write everything in romanized Korean, if you're going to write out some unneeded phrases in Korean,

 Another thing that you should check out is that you capitilize 'O' in oppa. Remember, "oppa" in Korean means "older brother". Do you capitilize brother? No. The only reason you would capitilize oppa is if it was the first word in a sentence. There is no need to capitilize it since it isn't a name.

Plot and Theme (25/35)
I have seen a lot of angst stories with themes like this. It isn't really anything new. I really do like the meaning of "The One" in the story. It's the reason why I added five more points onto it. Rarely do angst fic have any real meanings or lessons behind it. I also really love how true it is as well.

Entertainment Factors (9/10)
I really liked it. While I wasn't really excited since it' a very common plot, I really liked it.

Overall Score (85/120)

Reviewer's Song Choice: