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CHAPTER 3

“Does he look all right to you?”

Despite wanting to ignore the exchange of whispers between Chanyeol and Jongdae, their voices resonated in Kyungsoo's unwillingly eavesdropping ears. Never had Baekhyun rejected meal, especially since they were hardly given anything substantial due to their company’s strict diet policy, and Kyungsoo couldn’t help but feel some concern. He attempted to shrug the uncomfortable feeling away, like a fly that had landed on his sleeve, but no amount of shrugging seemed to make any difference. He stopped his ministrations when his peripheral vision caught Jongin’s confused glance in his direction.

As Kyungsoo resumed his meal, albeit with a lot less enthusiasm than a few moments prior, he took a moment to ponder over the older vocalist's recent behaviour. Baekhyun had been uncharacteristically and especially un-Baekhyun-like in that moment, and he couldn’t think why that was so. His eyes met with Jongdae’s for a split second and he could feel the coldness and accusation in them. Scoffing quietly, he attempted to entertain himself with his meal for a third time, savouring what he could, and finally decided that he didn’t really care if Baekhyun didn’t want to eat or not. It’s not my concern, he tried to convince himself, he can take care of himself and he’s better off than the rest of us anyway. Kyungsoo took a large gulp of water to suppress the uneasy feeling that had started to climb its way up his throat, and spent the last few moments wondering why.

Everything hurt. Baekhyun the shower, opting for a cold jet of water rather than his usually steam-room routine, and stood beneath the head. His body hurt from being overworked, his head hurt from the rampaging headache that came with lack of sleep, but the constricting sensation in his chest hurt above all else. Whether what he was feeling was physical or emotional, he had no clue, but perhaps it was both. Ultimately, what was clear was that he was in pain, and that he was hurting a great deal more than he had in a long time.

The cold water continued to hit the top of his head like a spray of rocks and sent recurring waves of shivers throughout his already exhausted body. Baekhyun remained where he was, waiting for his body to wake up and his mind to clear up a little, but the shock did very little to fight away his drowsiness and the emptiness in his chest. Flashbacks of his insecurities and the misery that he thought he had overcome were resurfacing and he shivered again, but not from the cold this time. The young singer recognised this feeling; he was falling again.

He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to catch himself this time.

A knock came at the bathroom door, distracting Baekhyun from his thoughts.

“Hyung, I need the bathroom!” Came Jongin’s muffled whine, “and we’re leaving in ten.”

How long have I been in here?, he wondered as he adjusted the the thermostat, warming the previously cold spray of water.

“Just a sec” he called out, and proceeded to furiously rinse the suds out of his hair and scrubbed at his body at a rate he had never before moved at. After finishing up, he came out of the bathroom and was confronted by a pouty Jongin.

“What took you so long?” Jongin whined again, but zoomed past Baekhyun to get into the bathroom without waiting for a reply.

Confused, Baekhyun made his way to his shared bedroom, and managed to fish out a clean pair of tracksuits along with a t-shirt that required a sniff-test before he deemed it fresh out of the laundry. No sooner had he finished getting his clothes on, Jongdae appeared at the doorway inquisitively.

“Took you a while in there,” said member commented as he watched Baekhyun struggle to locate his towel. Jongdae tutted judgingly, a grimace stretching across his face as he scanned the mess that had accumulated in the bedroom.

“Wasn’t that long,’ Baekhyun huffed as he rubbed towel through his hair in an attempt to dry it as much as possible.

“Yeah, because nearly forty-five minutes isn’t a long time” Jongdae retorted dryly. His unconvinced expression only induced the other to roll his eyes.

“Now you’re just exaggerating-,”

“No, really,” Jongdae insisted, “Tao and Sehun had to shower together. You were supposed to shower with Tao today.”

Forty-five minutes? It had only felt like ten. He made no move to respond, since he didn’t know what time he had even gone to shower, and pretended to busy himself with tidying up his bed. He heard Jongdae sigh and took it as his cue to slide past the other vocalist and into the living room. He breathed, grateful that he ha avoided further interrogation.

Some of the other members were already waiting for the call to come down to the car park, and Baekhyun felt eyes following him as he shuffled around the room looking for his phone. He rubbed his eyes tiredly when he failed to locate it, but then saw as a Jongdae took his own phone from his pocket and made a call. A familiar ringtone blared through the silence and Baekhyun tracked the sound until he saw his phone peaking out from a gap in between two sofa cushions upon which Kyungsoo was sitting.

Baekhyun grimaced internally as Kyungsoo looked down and started to dig his hand through the gap to retrieve the noisy item. Baekhyun stood in front of Kyungsoo as the other finally pulled the phone out and watched as the other looked up upon realising who the phone belonged to. Kyungsoo’s face appeared disinterested and his simply held out the phone with two fingers and went back to whatever he had been looking at on his own. Baekhyun thanked the younger quietly before retreating to the kitchen only to find that his phone was ringing once again.

“Hey, Hyung”

“Morning, Baek!” The PD greeted a bit too enthusiastically for such an early time of day.“I just wanted to check if staying till midnight is okay with you today”

“Yeah, sure, Hyung,” Baekhyun replied

“Perfect, I’ll pick you up at the back of your apartment block at six thirty this evening. We’re going to have to leave you with Yoonhee as soon as we drop you there, but we’ll be back by midnight to drive you back to yours.” Jungwon paused, his voice suddenly sounding unsure. “Hyun-ah, you’re sure you have enough time to come over, right? I know you guys are really busy at the moment, and honestly I feel bad-”

“Hyung, honestly don’t worry!” Baekhyun intercepted, “We’ve got the rest of the day off after five o’clock. Plus, I owe you this! If it wasn’t for you-” he heard Jungwon chuckle through the phone before the other interrupted him.

,“Hyun-ah, I would’ve helped you out anyway. You’re one of the most genuine people I’ve ever met in this industry! And don’t act like you weren’t playing your part too.”

“That’s a bit of an exaggeration,” Baekhyun scoffed comically, shaking his head at the nonsense he was hearing.

Jungwon made a noise that sounded like a groan followed by a sigh, and suddenly he was speaking with a great deal more seriousness.

“You don’t always have to make yourself out to be the joker or the joke, Hyun-ah.”

Baekhyun caught the breath he was realising mid-way and froze, feeling almost exposed.

“If it wasn’t for you blatantly acting like you would stick with Junmyeon no matter what and your constant support for him, I don’t think I’d have been very effective at all. The others like Junmyeon, but they have others lined up for his position. All I really had to do was remind them that the dynamic between you two is what makes you guys so loveable and so endearing to watch. That’s when they decided to keep him on.”

Jungwon called out his name after not getting