February 2008

    “These are mine”

     “How come every piece of clothes I choose is always yours?”

    “My clothes are mine, yours are yours, ‘kay?”

    “More like yours are yours and mine are also yours.”

    “Good. You already know that.”

    “Why are you like this?”

    “This is how I live~”

    That’s it! I can’t bear it anymore! I’ll just quit!

    (All I can do is think and kept quiet, take the ugly clothes that’s left for me and change.)

    And the costumes war comes back again this promotion cycle. With me being forever loser.

    “I feel you.”

    “Don’t say that if yours actually look much better than mine.” I say bitterly.

    Stylist noona, you get paid for this job, you know?

    “It’s not that bad, Seungri-ya”

    “Wanna swap?”

    “I’m too tall.”

    “I hate you! All of you guys!”

    “No, you don’t. You just hate to lose.”

    I give my three-years-older hyung a piercing glare. Despite our big , we are surprisingly close due to his childlike mentality.

    “Listen little Seunghyun, you have to take your time, wait for the sweet revenge.” Big Seunghyun whispers.

    “You want my revenge?”

    “No, not on me. Those three.”

    “Why’re you trying to use me?”

    “Think about it! Youngbae, you always have to polish his shoes. And you even have to massage him even though you’re exhausted. Jiyong, he gets the best stage costumes, every single time. Daesung, Daesung is… that guy is nice. But whatever.”

    “And that Biggest Hyung. He stole my blanket last winter, do you know him by any chance?”

    I ask *innocently*.

    “I was taking care of you! Took it to laundromat.”

    “When will that revenge time come? I’m really emotionally drained…”

    I mumbled, try to zip up a hideous white jacket.

    Stylist Noona! You get paid to help me dress, too, you know?

    “Why don’t you just , umm, disappear?”

    “I’ve no idea you hate me this much.“

    “No! I mean… just to make them feel guilty for abusing you all these time.”

    “Not gonna work. They’ll throw a party or something like that.”

    I look past Top hyung’s shoulder. Those three are laughing and playing about.

    “Very likely.”

    “Hey! Choose your side!” I snap my fingers.

    “Forget it. My bad.”

    “Hyung!”

    “Have you seen Seungri?”

    Kwon Jiyong half run half walk almost everywhere in the broadcast hall, his bare face covered in small drops of sweat. The staffs look around and shake their heads no. 

    It’s Friday. Everyone wants to finish their work early.

    “Where did he go?” Daesung who has just changed ask nervously.

    “No one saw him.”

    “What a jerk!”

    Seunghyun comments before he sends one last biscuit into his mouth. He’s been eating snack the entire time the members ran around looking for Seungri.

    “Have you called?” Manager pulls away the empty snack plate.

    “Yeah, he left it here.” Youngbae holds Seungri’s cellphone. It’s in Maknae’s bag.

    “No wallet in here” he looks inside.

    “He’ll be back. You guys go home first, I’ll find him”

    “Why so hurry that kid. Huh”

    “Are you talking to me, hyung?”

    “Oh, nothing, no.” Seunghyun denys. He rests his chin on his hand, watching TV while