JI EUN

 I crawl onto my bed as I wrapped myself with my blanket like a burrito. After the scene that I just made in the cafeteria yesterday, I was too ashamed to walk back in class so I asked Baekhyun to take me home instead. I was mortified at how we looked back then, how everyone stared at us. I even saw a bunch of girls looked at me in disgust. And Lu Han. Oh God. The way he looked at me, surprised and probably irked by what he just saw. I can’t help but cry because of it.  

I knew that Kai did that on purpose. He knew that I hated too much PDA but he insisted in doing it, during lunch and in front of everyone. I was mad at him and he didn’t even try and explain himself to me when I walked out, I was expecting him to at least run up to me but nothing happened. Not that I wanted to talk to him but I expected a little bit of effort from him.

There was a knock at my door. “Sweetie, are you okay? Baekhyun texted me that he took you home because you were feeling sick. Do you need anything?” My mom says through the door. “I’m okay. I’m just going to take a nap.” I try to sound as normal as possible or else my mom would be suspicious of me. And I’m too tired to tell her what happened at school because it feels like all my energy was out from me. “Okay then. Just call me when you need anything.” She replies and I feel hot tears running down my cheeks. “Thanks, Mommy.” I answer, my trembling voice was clearly audible but she didn’t ask any further and I hear her walk down the stairs. 

I heard two consecutive clinks on my windowpane as I stand up and move my curtains on the side. I see Kai standing in our yard with his hands tucked inside his pockets. I slide my window up as I pop out my head outside, “What are you doing here?” It was freakin’ 11 in the evening and my parents are asleep by now. I suddenly grow tense when I realize that my parents will kill me when they find out that Kai is in our house. My parents aren’t really that much of in favor of Kai as my boyfriend. They find that jocks are players, and I insisted that not all of them – even Kai. I don’t even know when my parents became stereotypes when they didn’t even mind my sister dating a jock when she was in high school. It’s like they were preventing me into becoming like her when we’re nothing alike, besides the physical look, they always mistaken as us twins, which flatters my sister who is five years older than me and that makes me five years older as her, which is an unfair advantage for me. My sister was the rebel type, she breaks the law here and there until my parents got fed up with her actions and decided to not just care anymore. When my sister got pregnant, that’s when she stopped and realized that she has her own responsibility from now on and my parents aren’t going to be there when she’ll have this baby. When she broke the news, mom and dad was devastated at her and I just ask the baby’s gender. I didn’t want to hate the baby because he/she was a gift and my parents soon accepted it when they saw her came out into this world, and they named her Yera, she named it after my grandma’s.

After years, my sister met a guy at the restaurant where she was working and she told me that it was love at first sight. My sister never had any relationship after the one she dated when Yera was one. She kept Yera a secret and told him that she was our baby sister. After two years of dating, he told her that he was willing to take their relationship to the next step and she told him the truth about her. The guy didn’t take it that she lied to him but most of it is that she has a child that wasn’t his so they broke up and she left her broken and shattered. She was then scared to enter in another relationship so she just focused into surviving Yera. Well, only a few people knew about her since she moved to London with her husband and daughter. I’m happy for her, despite the crazy past that she had when she was a teen, I think she deserved it, a beautiful family and a happy life.

Maybe it’s the reason why they hated me for dating a jock. I don’t blame them for being protective of me and for stopping me from repeating our history, but they need to trust me more and more. It’s like th