Sorry, but it still a prequel. Less fluffly even because it happens even before the last story... yeah, I don't know why I keep writing prequels...

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Hanbin feels time slows down as he watches the ball hangs in the air, bringing with it all the possibilities dangling in uncertainty. He switches his gaze to the small libero laying on the floor, to the red mark in his hands, and back to the yellow and blue globe fighting its way against gravity. The loud choir of audiences dissipates into a menacing silence as he sees Mino, the team ace spiker, extends his exhausted hands forward, twisting his ankle in such angle Hanbin knows must hurt. His heart thumps louder as the adrenaline rushes him to move to the other side of the court—a force stirring all his team members to the same motion.

But it’s too late.

Even as Mino reaches out, even as Seunghoon jumps, even as Hanbin wants to prevent it with all his might, the ball hits the ground and rolls unatended to the corner of the room.

The blood pumping on his ears ringing so loud he can not hear the final whistle.

It’s too late.

25 - 22
They’ve lost.

*****

“I’m sorry...” The soft whisper is barely heard in the gloomy changing room, but the guilt is heavy in Jinhwan’s avowal. Hanbin knows it was not his fault, everybody know it was not Jinhwan’s fault. But there is no use in telling, for each of them understands the regret. Each of them knows how it feels to recite their own mistakes inside, calculating how thing could be different if only...

If only I could block that one attack properly... Hanbin thought regretfully, head hungs low.

“It’s okay! We did our best!” Seungyoon says brightly, wearing his usual smile and trying to lift the atmosphere as a cheerful leader he is. “It couldn’t be helped, our opponent is the nation’s big four... Don’t slump down! You guys did your best!”

They did.They have ing done their best.

But losing means everything is over no matter how much hardwork you put in.

And it ing hurts.

“You still have a lot of matches ahead of you, don’t worry. Now, change your stinky uniform while I bribe the teacher for a barbeque!” Patting Jinhwan’s shoulder, Seungyoon excuses himself with a big grin. No one but Hanbin seems to notice a single tear rolling on his cheek as he exits the room—or, if they do notice, opt to keep it on their own just like him.

Hanbin wonders how Seungyoon could be so strong.

Reluctantly, all of them rise from their seat. Giving each other a weak solacing pat. Taehyun and Jinwoo are now both by Jinhwan’s side, trying to prevent their junior from turning into a sobbing wreck—like a crybaby he is.

Hanbin is the youngest in the team, the last to join the regular line up. He is the only freshman who can make the cut after only a month training. He feels proud of himself. While the others only get to sit on the bench, he can boldly fight in the court. Volleyball has been his passion since long, from way back then he does nothing but play the sport, and he knows with his ability and preseverance he clearly does deserve the spot.

Being only six months in the team though, he has the less bond with everyone else. He can not be the cute maknae, he is stoic and serious in nature. Instead of that his interaction mainly consists of discussing strategy with the captain, or doing extra tossing practices with the spikers. They are close, but even when Hanbin can easily reduce the gap on their skills, he can not dream to reach the degree of the seniors friendship.

And eventhough he is sad, angry—frustated even—at their loss, he could barely relate to the grief the other members is experiencing. For him, this is just the first. For him, he can still see himself standing at the court with Jiwon, Yunhyeong, and the other freshmen in the next tournament.

For most of the regulars, though, this is their last game.

Feeling a tad bit guitly of nothing in particular, Hanbin exits the room to get some fresh air—and let the hyungs have all the space and time betweem themselves.

*****

The thought of escaping apparenty has not only crossed his mind. Just a few minutes after he has settled on his hiding place—a shady spot under the tree at the back of the gymnasium, he hears footstep closing by. When he looks up, he is greeted by Jinhwan, a slight suprise adorning his small face.

“Oh, sorry. I thought no one is here.” The older’s voice is cracking a bit. Hanbin is mildly amazed when he realises Jinhwan has not been crying—eventhough he is clearly on the verge of it. Maybe that, and the fact that Hanbin is weak against vulnerable looking stuffs, is why Hanbin offers the spot next to him instead of urging the other boy to leave, which the older gratefully appreciates.

They sit there in complete silence, each consumed by their own busy thought. Hanbin casts a sideway glance at Jinhwan, realising how young he looks despite being a year and a half older than him.

Being the only sophomore amongst the third years, Jinhwan used to be the maknae of the team. Even after the freshmen rolls in, he is STILL the fake maknae of the ream. The seniors pamper him a lot, and that is why Hanbin is not really close to him—he guess, he does not really get the chance to when everyone seems to demand Jinhwan’s presence.

He really should work on his social skill, just like what Jiwon said.

“I feel like crying...”

Hanbin’s train of thought is cut by Jinhwan’s half-whisper. The older looks at him with a tired face and Hanbin just dumbly stares at him. “I’m really pathetic... You are younger and you can be this strong, taking it all in yourself and let the hyungs have their moment. And here I am crying like a crybaby I am...”

Hanbin wants to tell that he is not pathetic, that it is okay to cry and all those stuffs a gentleman should say. But he is Hanbin, and Hanbin is no gentleman in the making.

Jinwhan takes his silence as a signal to go on with his ranting, or he may be too exhausted to even care about what Hanbin thinks.

“It is their last game in high school, and I know how much it means for them. To have it ended in my hand...” Jinhwan looks down on his palms and Hanbin could still see the bruises, both from today’s match and late night practices. Jinhwan is a hardworking guy. He lands the position of the libero after a year sitting on the bench, working his hardest to improve even when his other friends drop-out from the club. Hanbin could see the fondness in Taehyun’s voice as he tells it to him that one particular day. “And I feel like I should not have the right to cry, you know?”

Hanbin knows, but he retains his silence. Still intently listening to Jinhwan’s voice.

“I still have next year, but it is their last. They should be the one crying yet they pretend to be strong so I don’t cry. Even until the end I am the one who is always depending on the hyungs.” A single tear rolls on the older’s cheek. Hanbin scoots closer for reasons he does not understand. “It is j— just... that—”
When Jinhwan finally cries, Hanbin puts an arm around the older and pulls him closer. He is always bad with words anyway. His tongue gets stuck in the most uncool way possible. So he does what he do best, showing his feelings through his body.

Jinhwan seems so small in his embrace.

As Jinhwan’s sobs get louder, body shaking violently against his chest, Hanbin uses his free hand to slowly his hair, trying to calm the other down. This is not the first time Hanbin sees Jinhwan cries (be it from the hyung’s petty fight, or when his day gets really rough), but this is the fist time he witnesses such verocity in his tears. Emotion spilling down in endless dropplets and choked bawls.

Hanbin wants to say that he does great. That his effort to not cry in front of the hyungs is commendable, praiseworthy even.

That he is at the same time both vulnerable and strong.

Funny how only in the time of such despondency you can finally see others in a different light, under the sun where suddenly their emotions are laid bare for one to grasp.

When his cry finally subdues (and they both get numerous calls from Seungyoon who is franctically looking for them), Jinhwan releases himself from Hanbin’s grip. He wipes his tear-stained face with the sleeve of his tees, trying to look better with not much progress. “I guess I should go to the bathroom first, hyung will fuss me to no end if I appear looking like this.” He cracked a dry laugh and begin to stand, dusting the dirt from his shorts.

Hanbin continually staring at him all the while.

“By the way,” Jinhwan grins down at him and slightly ruffles Hanbin’s hair, much to the latter’s surprise. “thank you Hanbin-ah.”

Even as he watches the figure dissapears into the distance, Jinhwan’s sincere smile is still as clear as day in his eyes.

Habin feels as if something had been stolen from him.
(Is it his voice?)

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Don't judge me, I don't even know what I'm doing or why it somehow turns into this....ha!