III.

She forced him to put up fairy lights.

It has something to do with dreams and neverland and all things beautiful and happy. He argued twice, but the third time, Jaein has brought in the small bulbs and was already putting them up just right above where their heads would be at night. Not that Himchan could really complain. But when they cuddled at night, it made the difference between seeing her and, well, not seeing her. Anyway, it was one of her wishes before getting married to him.

And when that day finally came, and they said their vows in front of a small group of closely knit friends, Himchan was overwhelmed with emotions that he was the first to cry when she entered the chapel, dressed in a flowy white gown. He remembered all the things that happened to him ever since he met her and realized that this was really what he had imagined since that day.

Gone were his doubts of a happily ever after with her. Himchan thought that whatever happens, he will stay with Jaein. And they will have their happiness together.

Things were going perfectly well and the groom has moved in her apartment in Oido. Himchan still has to deal with his idol status, and graduating from university. The fans have slowly accepted that Himchan has tied the knot with the love of his life, and they have sent them belated wedding gifts.

A few months later, Jaein burst out of the toilet, a stick on hand, and waved in it front of Himchan who was wiping sleep from his eyes.

"I think I'm pregnant," she squealed. But before Himchan can even comprehend what she was saying, the smile on her face was wiped away with a grim line of her lips.

Himchan, almost too late to realize the situation, grabbed Jaein's hand and pulled her into a big hug.

"We'll figure it out."

And that was when Jaein started crying, wailing like a kid left in the doorstep of an orphanage. "I want him. I want a child, Himchan. But I don't want him to end up like me. I want him to have a happy life, a complete family. Himchan, Himchan," the frail woman repeated like a mantra, hoping that the name would somehow send the sickness away.

"Shhhh," the man whispers into his wife's ear. "You're all better now, Jaein. See. The doctor said you have just to live a healthy lifestyle. You can have a child, Jaein. We will have this child. I will do everything for us to meet him."

The trip to the doctor that day confirmed that Jaein was indeed expecting a child and she's almost three months along. However, pregnancy wasn't easy, as with everything else that has anything to do with Jaein's life. But Himchan did everything he can to make it easier for Jaein. He scoured all supermarkets just to get her dried ripe mangoes, and all convenience stores to get pomegranate juice. He woke up at 4am even though he arrives home at half past midnight for two straight weeks just to get Jaein her craving for madeleine breads, from the bakery across the street. He personally brought Jaein to all her pregnancy appointments and monthly check-ups.  He suspended his activities for the last trimester of the pregnancy until Kim Yojeong was born.

∞

Himchan slowly opens his eyes at the light tapping on the door.

He recognizes the black head of hair just underneath the doorknob.

“Appa,” whispers a tiny voice, unsure if she was heard by the older man she calls father. “Appa?” louder this time.

Himchan sits up and sees the familiar face of his wife, but much younger and without a trace of sadness in her dark orbs; only excitement at seeing her father who has been away for two weeks.

“Yojeong-ah!” Himchan stands up and takes his daughter to his arms, swinging the preschooler around once before giving her a big hug and kissing her forehead. “I missed you.”

“Appa, how was New York?”

“New York is cold Yojeongie,” the father pulls the daughter into another forceful hug. “But the New York Babys loved our show! It’s sad because we only had 2 nights there. Could’ve spent more time with them, but we had to fly back. Appa missed you a lot!”

“I missed Appa too!” the child giggles sprawling on the duvet covers. “Aunt Yejin said I should see you tomorrow because it’s late, but Yojeongie misses Appa very much.”

Himchan kisses his daughter’s cheek and notices t