Sehun stared at his own reflection in the bathroom mirror. He let out a sigh. Whatever he did, it never worked, and right now he didn't need it to work either. His feelings wasn't as bad as he thought they would be, but he figured out he could live with it, or at least find a way to do so. 

They met in middle school and instantly became more important in each other lives than oxygen. Everyone knew how good friends they were and everyone knew wherever there was a Sehun, there is a 95% chance there will be a Tao with him.

He had always looked at Tao as an older brother. Though their friendship first started out with Sehun helping and teaching the Chinese student. Tao had always been a rather touchy person, even when they first met. Neither of them found anything strange in hugs and cuddles, like it's scientifically proven to make you happier, so it wasn't that big of a deal, right?

Sehun liked the hugs and the cuddles on cold winter days. That was until his heart started beating faster when his best friend's body came close to his own, or how he would stare at is friend's lips moving when he talked, or how he started to wonder how they would feel against his own. 

No matter how many girls he dated, no matter how pretty or wonderful they were, they never made his undying feelings for his own best friend go away, and it made him terribly frustrated. He had tried to ignore his older friend, but it ended up making the both of them rather sad, so that wasn't an option at all.

It hadn't been many days since he accept his own uality, the only problem was if people around him could accept him. His parents, his group of friends(not really much to do there because a few of them are already out as either gay or bi/pan), his best friend and his girlfriend. Yepp, his current girlfriend, Haera.

They had been dating for 2 months, she was great. Long dark hair, cute button nose, droopy eyes and pretty pink lips and her personality even better. However he wasn't attracted to her. He felt sorry and guilty for doing this to her, it was such a selfish thing to accept her confession and pretend to like her, only so that he could try to forget his own feelings. She didn't deserve this. She deserved a guy who well, liked girls to begin with.

But the sooner he ended it, the less damage he would do, at least he hoped so.

As he had left the bathroom he walked over to the couch and picked up his phone from the coffee table in front of him and gathered up his courage to send her a message. It took him probably 5 minuted to write a proper message after all the 15 other ones that he kept erasing and rewriting. 

To: Haera

Haera, do want to go out and have some bubble tea? :D 

Sent. It took five minutes until she replied, agreeing on meeting up.

The spring weather was nice, not too cold nor was it too hot. They had found a bench in the park that was nearby the bubble tea shop they had just been at 6 minutes ago. The park had a beautiful scenery, in the winter it would be covered in white snow and the small pond would be frozen, and some of the trees would be decorated with christmas lights. But in the summer it would be green, all of it. The pond would be covered with lily pads and ducks being fed by children, and the tall trees would have green leaves rustling in the wind with couples sitting under them on blankets enjoying their time together.
 

Haera sat down on his left, she eagerly spoke about how pretty the park looked and how nice the smells were. But Sehun couldn't focus on her words, he kept thinking about what to say, how he could do this in the kindest way as possible. Not that there were many kind ways to come out as gay to your girlfriend and tell her you were never attracted to her at all. 
 

Of course Haera noticed how he didn't really pay attention to her, or how is face his face that carried a smile just a moment ago was now turned into a frown
 

“Sehunnie, are you feeling well? You don’t looks so good. Maybe you should just go home and rest.” The smile she gave him was warm and loving. It's the smile that made every single guy at their school fall for her, well the ones who actually liked girls that is. It's the same smile she would give him secretly when they had class. It was also the same smile she gave him when she confessed her feelings for him.

And now he had to break her heart. Fantastic.

He let out a sigh and lifted his eyes to they met hers. “Haera, there is something I need to tell you…”  Her smile never faltered, but she grabbed his hand that was shaking slightly. His heart was beating so fast it was feeling as if it was going to rip out if his chest.
 

"Sure, you can tell me anything, you don't have to be so nervous." She gently squeezed his hand and caressed his cheek lovingly 

“There is something I've tried to get over, and I thought being with you would help, but it never did, not even with the other girls. You're an amazing and wonderful person. You're so beautiful in every single way, all the other guys would die to get your attention. But I can't feel it, I can't feel the attraction, Haera. And for years now I have wondered why I never felt the thrill of holding hands with a girlfriend, or when we kissed why I never felt anything. Well that was until I started feeling all that with someone I knew I shouldn't. I started feeling that for a guy, Haera. I've been trying to deny the possibility of what my uality might be, but now I'm ready to accept it” He turned his head to get eye contact with her, but she was looking at the ground, lips shut together into a thin line and cheeks filled with a pink blush. "I hope you can do that too."
 

"I hope you're happy. Good bye, Sehun." Her voice was shaking and tears were falling down her cheeks. Not once did she look at him when she walked away. He had hurt her, she didn't deserve this at all. 

Before he could become even more gloomy his phone rang in his pocket. He fished it out of his pocket to see who the idiot was who wanted to disturb him at this moment. But the caller ID made Sehun smile brightly. “Tao! How are you? You haven’t called in 3 days, I was getting worried.”

3 days seems like nothing for some people, and you may say he was overreacting, but ever since they met there hasn't gone 48 hours between each time they talked to each other. So for Sehun 3 days felt like 3 months.
 

“Hunnie, I told you I was going away with my family and you know how they are." Sehun found himself giggling at the thought of the Huang parents. They are a very sweet and loving couple, but family time literally meant family time. No talking to Sehun on the phone, no browsing the internet, nothing. "But I’m home now. Why don’t we meet at the park? How does that sound to you, you lil’ brat?” sounds of Tao chuckling in the other end of the call gave Sehun butterflies in his stomach.

How he had missed it. “I'm actually already here, so I'll wait for you then. See you later!” as he hung up he could feel his heart drop. He was meeting Tao, and he was going to tell him everything. He internally cursed at himself. He had prepared himself for this, yet why did he not feel ready?
 

It took Tao 20 minutes to get to the park from when they hung up. Seeing the blond boy made his heart skip a beat. He looked so stunning in his plain white shirt and black jeans. Others wouldn't give him a second look, but to Sehun, he was the most beautiful thing in this whole entire park. 

Tao noticed Sehun who sat on the bench and gave him a wave before he started to jog over to him. 
 

"Sehun, did you miss me?" Tao asked cheekily and opened his arms to get a hug, but Sehun didn't more from the bench he was sitting on. Tao let his arms fall on his side with a pout on his lips. 
 

He wanted to hug him, but he couldn't let himself do that. "Me and Haera broke up."

Not a single word came from his best friend, all he did was pull him into a hug, patting his head a