04.

“Suddenly calling me out at this hour for a drink, what’s wrong?”

Baekhyun turned to the source of the voice. “Louis...”

“Baekhyun?! Are you okay?!” Louis yelled when he noticed how red Baekhyun’s eyes were.

Baekhyun started sobbing once again, sending the whole bar in distress.

After a while, Louis managed to calm him down, and they moved to one of the booths. Louis watched as he blew his nose, worried. “Baekhyun, what happened?”

Baekhyun only pouted. “Hey, when you were dating me, did you ever get jealous about things?”

“Of course I did.”

“Really? When did you get jealous? Why?”

Louis chuckled. “I can’t believe this is a question you have to ask. You might think our relationship was shallow but I honestly loved you, Baekhyun. I’d always get jealous when you cling onto other guys. You always did that. But I tried to understand since you’ve always been like that.”

“That’s your fault.”

“I guess so. Hm, oh, whenever we meet someone who turned out to be your ex, sometimes you hang out with them and you ignore me.”

“Eh? Really?”

Louis nodded. “You probably don’t notice that yourself because it’s natural for you to be friendly. Why? Did you and Chanyeol have a fight because of me?”

“Kind of.”

Louis gave him a look. “I’m leaving.”

“What? No! Don’t go!”

“You’re really a moron, aren’t you?”  Louis said, sighing.  

“But I don’t know what to doooo....”

“Fights like this, you should talk it out.”

“We did! And I tried to reason with him but he’s just--”

“Did you try to listen to him?” Baekhyun stared at Louis. “Did you ask him what was really wrong? Because I don’t think it’s only about me. You know him a lot better than I do.”

Baekhyun sighed deeply and bit his lip, trying to stop his tears. 

“If you two really can’t patch up, I’ll give you my two cents. Listen to me.”

--

When Baekhyun arrived back home the next morning, he found Chanyeol cleaning some armories at the living room. It was his stress-reliever. 

“Hi.” Baekhyun greeted.

“Hi.”

“Did you...did you sleep well?”

“No. Did you?”

Baekhyun shook his head. 

“Where were you?”

“With Louis. He gave me some advice. You?”

“Jongdae came. He was worried.”

“I see.” Baekhyun said while playing with his hands. “Chanyeol, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked out. I should’ve listened to you.”

“I know. I’m sorry too.” Chanyeol said while pulling the smaller towards him, embracing him. 

“Is this gonna happen again?”

“Probably.”

“What’s happening? We’ve never fought like this for a long time.”

“I don’t know.” Chanyeol agreed. “Jongdae was surprised too. He even said that we should go to a couple’s therapy.”

“Really? Louis said the same thing to me. Do they think we’re crazy or something?”

“Who knows.” 

“Are we?”

“Probably.”

Silence filled the air as they stay like that for another minute, as if replenishing the energy they’ve lost with the fight, trying to clear their mind about what happened.

“You have the calling card?” It was a good attempt.

“Don’t worry I already booked an appointment.”

“Good.” Baekhyun nodded.

--

They decided to visit the therapist immediately the next day. They tried putting it off until the weekend but because they were both scared of engaging into another verbal fight, they’ve been constantly sensitive towards each other that they both got fed up with it.

“So, I’ve heard a lot of things about you beforehand so this may be easier for us.” The therapist, Dr. Jihyun Lee, said while directing them towards their seats. “Today, we’re going to try something new.”

“Something new?”

“Why? Did they say we’re weirdos? Is that it?”

“No, no, honey, the problem is different for every couple, that’s why the methods are also unique, especially in your case.”

“You just flat out admitted--”

“Alright! Here we go!” Dr. Jihyun then pulled out two sets of folders and pens. “Now, I want you two to answer the questions honestly for me to evaluate afterwards. The questions are different for the both of you. I’ll be in the next room. Just knock when you’re done, okay?”

Surprisingly, despite their earlier protests, they ended up concentrating over answering the piece of paper. Dr. Jihyun thought it’s in their nature as businessmen, that’s why she chose this kind of method. After an hour, they finally finished, and they had to wait for another ten minutes for Dr. Jihyun to finish evaluating their answers.

“This room’s pretty dull.” Chanyeol said while looking around.

“Yeah. How is this supposed to look therapeutic?”

Baekhyun and Chanyeol immediately cleared their throats when the door opened.

“It seems that you two are extremely in love with each other.” Dr. Jihyun said it as if it was the most unfortunate thing anyone could have. “Although it is a beautiful thing, this kind of love is very dangerous.”

“What? How can love be dangerous?” Baekhyun and Chanyeol stated in confusion.

“Not to you two, but to other people.”

Chanyeol crooked his eyebrows in confusion. “What are you talking about? We’ve never hurt anyone. And we’ll never hurt anyone without a reason.”

Dr. Jihyun gave him a look. “Really? Because I definitely heard some interesting things from your friends.”

“Okay, you should know, our friends Jongdae and Louis usually over-exaggerate.”

Dr. Jihyun cleared and then glanced at the paper she was holding to further prove her point. “What would you if you see your lover walking with an unfamiliar man? Point a gun at him.”

Baekhyun turned to Chanyeol who only looked away. “You wrote that?!” 

Then Dr. Jihyun turned to Baekhyun. “And you’re no different either. What would you do if you see a woman clinging to Chanyeol? Grab her hair and humiliate her public.”

“Well, since she’s obviously not Chanyeol’s type, it’s her fault!”

Dr. Jihyun sighed. “Did it ever cross your minds that these people may not have known about your ual preferences and the fact you’re already attached?”

“We’re all over the news, how can they not know?” Baekhyun and Chanyeol said in unison.

Dr. Jihyun was face-palming in her head. “The point is, normal people would first give them the benefit of the doubt before presuming something. And this is why, the kind of love that you have is dangerous to your surroundings. It’s like filling a cup with water. Even though it’s already filled, you still keep adding more water, in the end it overflows and the table gets wet. Do you understand?”

“You can just wipe it off.” Chanyeol and Baekhyun said, again, in unison.

“No, you can’t. That’s not how it works. When a stranger who you assumed to be trespassers suddenly appear in your backyard, you can’t just kill them, you have to inquire, to ask--there’s a whole process before carrying out any action. You two simply act without a single hint of doubt and so you end up hurting other people unnecessarily. Because you are each other’s territory, so for you, everyone else are trespassers, even if they mean no harm whatsoever.” Dr. Jihyun studied their expressions. They seemed to have calmed a little but it definitely alarmed them. “But luckily, we can do something about it. There’s only one solution to this problem.”

“And that is?”

“Adding one more cup.” Baekhyun and Chanyeol stared at her. “Adding another entity, a person.”

Baekhyun and Chanyeol immediately stood up from their seats in shock. “A ?!” 

“Ha?”

Baekhyun pointed at her. “Excuse me, woman, you just said that we love each other too much and that we could kill if someone trespasses our territory! How will a make it better?!”

“No, no, no! I didn’t mean that! I meant a child!”

Baekhyun gasps loudly, looking offended. “A CHILD?! EXCUSE ME, WOMAN, WE MAY BE WEIRDOS BUT WE’RE NOT ES!”

“What--”

“Hello, Child Support Services? Yes--”

Dr. Jihyun hurriedly turned to Chanyeol who was on the phone. “WHO ARE YOU CALLING--”

Baekhyun was still hysterical. “ HOW CAN YOU EVEN SUGGEST THAT?! AND YOU CALL YOURSELF A PROPER ADULT!”

“Yes, I’m here to report a e who--”

“Oh for Christ’s sake--” Dr. Jihyun then snatched the phone from Chanyeol and slammed it on the table as loud as he could to grab their attentions. “I MEANT, ADOPT A ING BABY AND BUILD A ING FAMILY, YOU MORONIC ERTS!”

Those words were the last they heard before the door slammed behind them. 

Chanyeol blinked. “She kicked us out.”

“Ugh. How rude.” 

They both sighed.

“A baby, huh.” Both of them wanted to know what the other was thinking but as soon as their eyes met, they immediately looked away, suddenly embarrassed. 

Chanyeol cleared his throat.  “Should we grab something to eat?”

“Somewhere with a few people maybe.”

Chanyeol’s phone rang and he immediately picked it up. “Oh, it’s Jongdae.”

--

“So?” Jongdae asked, glaring at the two culprits across him with his arms crossed. Chanyeol and Baekhyun just ignored him. “I can’t believe you two. I’m just--she told me never to contact her again and that she’s planning on moving to another city!”

The three of them decided to meet for lunch in the end, although Chanyeol and Baekhyun definitely didn’t expect this kind of atmosphere.

“You’re the one who told us to go there!” Baekhyun argued.

“Oh, so it’s my fault now that I was worried?” Jongdae exc;aimed sarcastically. “What happened anyway? What did she say that you two had to make a scene?”

Baekhyun subtly glanced at Chanyeol before murmuring.

“What? I can’t hear you.”

“She said we should adopt a baby!”

Jongdae nodded, after thinking about it for a moment. “That seems reasonable. What’s the problem?”

“Well...” 

“That therapy didn’t do anything, did it? You’re not even looking at each other!” Jongdae yelled in exasperation. “I’m done, okay. I can’t. Call me when you two finally stop acting like highschoolers!”

“What’s he so mad about?” Baekhyun asked in awe and Chanyeol only shrugged his shoulders in response.

--

“A baby? Really?” Luhan asked over the screen. Baekhyun realized pondering over the thought of having a baby for a whole week, distracting him from his chores and work, never did it any good and will not do him any good if he keeps it up so he finally Skype-d Luhan to let out his frustrations. “B, that’s great! Congrats! I’m so happy for you!”

This idiot can’t even read the mood.

“Who the hell are you congratulating? I’m in agony, Lulu! In agony!”

“What’s wrong?”

“We’re talking about a baby here! This is a big commitment! And it’s not like I have a uterus! ”

"Nobody thinks you have a uterus." Luhan said. “But alright, I see what you’re getting at. He’s that kind of man. A man who’d do a really good job being a father, raising his own kid and all that. The ideal man.”

“Stop it.” Baekhyun said, pouting.

Luhan only stuck a tongue out at him. “Well, have you talked about it with Chanyeol?”

“Not really.”

“B, this is really serious. You can’t just rely on assumptions. You have to talk about it, both of you, if you really wanna do it and how you’re gonna do it.”

“I think we all know the answer to that last one.”

“B!” 

Baekhyun chuckled and then sighed deeply. “Remember when we were just two guys trying to get by, squeezed in a small apartment...”

“Yeah. Time sure flies, huh? It only seemed like yesterday.” Luhan said, smiling as he remembered some of the fun times he had living with Baekhyun back in China. At that time, he had no idea Baekhyun was one of those heirs he only saw on TVs. It felt like his life suddenly turned into a big production movie. “I wonder how that guy is doing now.” That guy or the jerk who two-timed them.

“Jongdae said he’s getting married.”

“What? So he’s straight?! He’s really a scum!”

“Who cares?” Baekhyun said, dropping his head on the desk. “Everyone is getting married nowadays. Him, Tristan, that actor...that actress....ugh.” His remark was  met with silence and he looked up to see the change in Luhan’s expression. He sat up immediately. “Lu? What’s wrong?”

“Huh?” Luhan shook his head. “Nothing. Just thinking about work.”

“Oh, yeah. Is everything okay over there?”

“Yeah. Why do you ask?”

“Well, the other day when Chanyeol was skyping with Sehun, I saw a large bruise on Sehun’s cheek. No one in South Korea is that stupid to punch the Oh Sehun on the face so that means that was you, right?” Luhan bit his lips, as if trying to avoid something unavoidable. Moreover, Baekhyun’s claims were based on experience, seeing as he also once fell victim against Luhan’s punch. “Did something happen?”

“No, nothing happened.” Luhan immediately answered. “It was just a simple misunderstanding, and you know me, sometimes my body just moves on its own, punching people.” He ended with a chuckle but Baekhyun can see right through it.

“Alright. If you say so.” 

Luhan just smiled at him.

--

Sunday that week, Baekhyun and Chanyeol came to visit the Van der Gilt estate for a mini-gathering, hosted by Tristan and his fiancee, Viel--short for Victoria Elisa. The reason for this was not just so Viel and Chanyeol’s sisters, Gyuri and Yura, who have become friends shortly  after meeting each other at the engagement party, could get together for tea but to celebrate Viel’s pregnancy. She was two weeks pregnant.

Baekhyun couldn’t curse enough at the unfortunate timing.

Immediately after arriving, he was greeted with Leo running up towards him with no breaks and Arthur chasing behind him. Baekhyun grunted when he finally caught Leo, feeling his weight. Leo is 12 years old now but he seemed to be late bloomer seeing as he’s still a lot shorter than Arthur. 

“Damn,” Arthur said while catching his breath. “I think he’s really a dog. He smelled you and ran.”

Baekhyun chuckled and ruffled Arthur’s hair. “Don’t say things like that about your brother.” Arthur only pouted. “Although, he does kind of remind you of a beagle, doesn’t he?” Arthur laughed then, agreeing. Arthur is on his 3rd year in University now and he’s a good representation of someone who’s got luck behind them. He’s never had a failing score and he doesn’t even try that hard. It reminds him of a certain someone.

“It’s Hyung! Hyung!” Leo yelled excitedly when he spotted Chanyeol getting off the car and immediately ran towards him. When Leo first met him, he had a hard time pronouncing his name, so much like the first time he met Baekhyun. In Baekhyun’s case, he had an English name. Since Chanyeol didn’t have one, he thought hyung would be easier and so the word stuck. Baekhyun saw how Chanyeol effortlessly picked Leo up and cursed in jealousy. 

“Still lively as ever, huh.” Chanyeol said while walking towards them, carrying Leo in his arms. “Hi, Arthur. How’s school?” He asked as they start walking to the house.

“It’s fine.”

“I’m still amazed at how I’ve never seen you get stressed over school. Sehun would hate you.” Baekhyun chuckled at Chanyeol’s remark. “We’re here!” The giant announced as they walk inside and carefully putting Leo down.

Viel peeked out from the kitchen. “Finally! The queen is here!”

“Ha. Ha. Very funny.” Baekhyun said monotonously.

“Hello, Baekhyun.” Viel greeted with a smile. She’s multilingual so she didn’t have problems pronouncing their names, well, after a few tries of course. “Chanyeol, your sisters are at the back.”

“I’ll go and greet them.” Chanyeol said before running towards the backyard. 

Baekhyun watched him go, with Leo following behind him. Noticing, Chanyeol stopped to pick the boy up, and swung him around, flexing his arms. Baekhyun can hear his laughter even from outside. Baekhyun had always known how he laughed differently whenever he’s around kids. 

Baekhyun almost choked when Viel suddenly pushed a cupcake into his mouth. “Viel?!”

“What’s wrong, Baekhyun?” Viel asked while wiping the cream on top of her newly-baked batch of cupcakes.

“What?”

“You seemed to be preoccupied with something serious. Did something happen?”

Baekhyun blinked then shook his head. “No, sorry, nothing happened.”

“Baekhyun.” Viel reiterated, putting the spatula down on the table. 

“Really, nothing’s wrong. Don’t worry about it. I just got distracted for a second.”

Viel sighed in defeat. “I see. “

Baekhyun’s attention was back on Chanyeol, even though he really didn’t want to. Then he saw a familiar little girl joining their fun. “Is that Jiyoung?”

“Oh, yeah. Gyuri brought her here last week before going to Paris for some event. She stayed here the whole week. Leo likes her, they always play together.”

“That’s cute.”

“Though, I feel kind of bad for Arthur for having to babysit the both of them most of the time. I’m always visiting my OB/GYN and if not, resting. These kids aren’t friendly with the nannies.”

Baekhyun flinched. He might be responsible for that in Leo’s case.  “Arthur seems to be fine with it now? He used to complain whenever we ask him to watch over Leo but nowadays, I don’t hear him complaining.”

“Well, he’s seen a lot and matured accordingly. Leo has grown up a bit too, though his height is still lacking. Should I feed him more milk?”

“I’m sure he’s just a late bloomer.”

“Right. I heard Tristan himself was a late bloomer.” Viel followed with a chuckle.

Baekhyun wanted to laugh at loud but he’s learned to control his emotions...somehow. When he first arrived at the mansion, the Tristan he met was already tall and mature-looking for his age. He knows at least that much. So that was totally unexpected for him.

“Baekhyun, be a sweetheart and help me with these, will you?”

“Sure.” Baekhyun quickly grabbed the other batch and followed Viel to the backyard where the others were waiting. 

It was a full attendance. Both of Chanyeol’s sisters were there, Tristan and his close friends, Viel’s best friend Nicole, Yifan who arrived shortly after Baekhyun and Chanyeol did, and then the young ones, Jiyoung, Leo and Arthur. Arthur looked like a big brother, even giving off the same vibe Tristan did when he was younger, and it made Baekhyun happy. To this day, he still feels like he doesn’t deserve such loving brothers but all he can do now is love them unconditionally and be thankful for it.

“Have you thought of names yet?” 

Viel smiled from across the table. “Well, we still don’t know what the gender of the baby is but we already have a list.”

“Her list since she vetoed everything I suggested.” Tristan chirped beside her.

“No, I didn’t!”

“Really? Name one that came from me.”

“Uh...Philip?”

“That’s the first one you vetoed!”

Everyone roared with laughter.

“Let’s see if you guys can think of better names then. How about you Chanyeol? Any names?”

“Well, if you want Western names, uh, for a girl...Emma, for a boy...Ethan.”

“That was fast.”

“It’s like he’s imprinted those names already.”

Baekhyun can feel his stomach turning. Doesn’t that show how big of a deal talks of having a baby is for him? Names? Baekhyun doesn’t even have names saved in case of situations like this. For starters, he didn’t even think he’d be in this kind of situation.

“Baekhyun!” Baekhyun finally snapped. Everyone was silent for moment, all eyes on him, before Viel spoke again. “Any names? Baby names?” She asked.

“Sorry, I’m not really good with that, especially Western names.” Baekhyun said with a smile.

Monique nodded before turning back to Chanyeol. “Hey, but Chanyeol, you’re really good with kids, aren’t you? It’s not everyday you see a grown-up with the same energy level as those children. I’m telling you! When I came to play, I felt so tired, I wanted to sleep for the rest of my life! Ah, seriously!”

“Monique, you’re exaggerating again.” Viel intervened in mockery.

“I’m not! I’m totally not! And to think this wench is pregnant, ah seriously, what’s gonna happen to me from now on? I’ll be the world’s ugliest godmother!”

“You! Who says you’re going to be this baby’s godmother? There are two perfectly capable candidates here. Isn’t that right?” Viel said towards Chanyeol’s sisters, who smiled proudly in response.

“Ayyy, Vic, you know I’m joking right?” Monique cooed.  “But Chanyeol, I know you’re the youngest, but how are you so great with kids? It’s not like you have a son too, from what I’ve heard. Come to think of it, why don’t you have your own children yet? You’re totally in that age now!” 

Viel froze in the spot. Noticing Gyuri and Yura’s death glares, she immediately intervened, grabbing Monique’s arm.

“Ah, Monique! Why don’t I show you that dress I was talking about earlier!”

“Really? You were--”

“Come on! Come!” Viel yelled as she dragged Monique out of her seat.

“Alright, calm down!”

Chanyeol watched as they go. He’s not slow-witted so he figured out what was happening in an instant. Although it didn’t matter to him, Baekhyun might be another case.  He turned to Baekhyun in attempt to inquire, but Baekhyun was quick to stand up from his seat.

“I gotta use the loo.” Baekhyun said while swiftly hurrying back to the house to use the restroom. Chanyeol watched him go, and then distracted himself playing with Jiyoung.

Baekhyun sighed deeply as he walked out of the restroom. Although it was only an excuse for him to sort out his thoughts, he ended up defecating as his stomach has seemingly gone to one of those episodes. Thus, no sorting happened. And he’s already exhausted.

He quietly walked downstairs and stopped when he heard Monique’s yell, startled. It was coming from the kitchen, beside the staircase.

“God, I feel so awful! Vic, you know how my mouth works, you should’ve stopped me!”

“Right, blame it all on me. You’re still the same even though you’re almost 30 now.”

“I feel really ty right now. I can’t believe I mentioned having children in front of them.”

“Don’t worry. If you apologize, I’m sure they’ll understand. I don’t think they’re that bothered about having children and stuff.”

“Really?”

“Why?”

“Hm, I know a couple like those two. Although, they’re happily married living in Canada, it’s not like they can rid of their desires to have a kid of their own. Surrogacy won’t work. Adoption is an option too but can they really call that kid their own?” Monique sighed. “That’s why...even though they say they’re happy, it’s still lacking right? In our age, all we want now is to have our own family. I’m just wondering if those two are the same. I know Chanyeol is. It’s obvious by how well he gets along with the children in this house.”

“Well, judging from what the media says about them, they’ve been through something most couples don’t normally go through. Maybe they can overcome something like this too?”

“You said they went through something most couples don’t go through but...what most couples go through are internal conflicts--in return, it either strengthens them or breaks them. If they go through one, which will be the result?”

--

The ride back was pretty quiet. Baekhyun hated how this whole thing affected him more than he thought it would. He just hoped Chanyeol didn’t notice anything.  When they finally arrive home, Baekhyun felt exhausted that he just wants to take a nice bath and go straight to bed. This day has been pretty tiring for him--for them--mentally. 

“I’m gonna go prepare the bath.”

“Baekhyun, stop that.”

Baekhyun turned around. “What?”

“What you have been doing for the past two weeks--flat out avoiding me.”

“I wasn’t avoiding you.”

“You were. You won’t even look me in the eye. Tell me, did I do something wrong?”

“No, you didn’t, and it’s nothing, okay? You’re imagining it.”

“Baekhyun, I know you. Do you think I wouldn’t notice? This kind of silence is unnatural, especially for you.”

Baekhyun sighed. “It’s nothing.” He said before walking away, doing exactly what Chanyeol accused him of--avoiding. Pretty pathetic, if he must say.

In the end, he didn’t get his much deserved relaxing bath, as he was thinking about Chanyeol’s words the whole time, and a lot of thoughts sprung out from that.  After getting his pajamas on, he intended to head straight to the bathroom, but he was yet again reminded of Chanyeol and his words when he noticed the lights on his study are on. 

He sighed. It’s not like he can go inside the bedroom with a heavy heart. In addition, Chanyeol isn’t exactly at fault. He decided to walk towards the Chanyeol’s study and knocked before opening the door. “Chanyeol, I’m done with the bath.”

“Baekhyun, come here.”

Baekhyun obliged. Chanyeol was almost pouting when he spoke and Baekhyun figured it must another one of those things where he needs to “energize”. As expected, Chanyeol immediately pulled him closer, while still seated, and hugged his torso. His face was buried against Baekhyun’s stomach.

“I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?” Chanyeol murmured.

“You’re probably exhausted because of me...for being this way.”

Chanyeol looked up at him, creating a distance. “You’re sad.”

Baekhyun blinked at him. “I’m not. I’m fine. I’m just a bit distracted.”

“Can you tell me why?”

“It’s nothing. It’ll probably pass.” Baekhyun said while gently pushing off Chanyeol’s hands. “Go and take a bath, okay?” He said while trying to avoid looking at Chanyeol’s pained expression. 

“Baek--” Chanyeol called, getting off his seat to follow him but was interrupted.

“I’ll be upstairs.” Baekhyun told him with a smile before turning to the door.

“You’re really not gonna tell me?” Chanyeol asked again, hoping for a different answer this time. It made him worry that Baekhyun’s acting like this--the last time he acted like this, he turned out to be the heir of one of the biggest corporation in England. 

Baekhyun was second-guessing. A part of him wants to confront Chanyeol about it and a part just wants to keep it to himself until the worry disappears.  It’s just him, anyway. Although it did feel wrong that he talked to Luhan about it first.

“B, this is really serious. You can’t just rely on assumptions. You have to talk about it, both of you, if you really wanna do it and how you’re gonna do it.”

Baekhyun stopped by halfway to the door. Assumptions. He wasn’t just overthinking things, he was just assuming--because he had already expected to hear something disappointing about the matter. 

But he also isn’t stupid to now know what will happen if he walks out of the door--this matter will just keep going until it becomes bigger and uncontrollable. And this is already bad enough, for him.

“Chanyeol, can you ever live a life without a family of your own?” Chanyeol stared at him. Somehow, he saw it coming but it still surprised him. “A family to cherish and protect, a family of your own. I really think that’d be good for us. We don’t know it yet but...maybe...””

“This is because of Monique?”

“No, it’s just--”

“Then that therapist?” 

“Don’t you think she’s right? What if...what if instead of complimenting each other, we’re actually destroying each other? What if the cups break in the end?” Baekhyun was fondling with the seams of his shirt. It was obvious that he was uneasy, and that this is all so hard for him to say, that’s why Chanyeol listened eagerly. “What if because the cup is too small for us?”

“Then...you want this to end? Because of that?”

Baekhyun looked away. Chanyeol noticed he was biting his lips. That means Baekhyun don’t have any sort of explanation, and even if he does, it was none of his business.

“You know, I’ve thought about it. I’ve always wondered how long we’ll be able to stay together like this, how long will our feelings last but...” Chanyeol gulped, as if swallowing his tears. “I just say to myself, we’re Chanyeol and Baekhyun, because that’s what you always say right? And it makes me really happy whenever I hear it, because it became a sort of assurance for me.”

“Chanyeol, I was just saying--”

“You always look for adventure, for something exciting. That’s why, if you’re tired of being with me then...I can only accept it and give up.” Because if that were the case then he definitely saw it coming. A day will come when Baekhyun will finally look for something new, to run away and fly.

Silence shortly filled the room until Baekhyun threw the vase against the wall, catching Chanyeol off-guard. 

“Baekhyun--” Chanyeol said, reaching out his hand which Baekhyun rejected harshly.

“Give up?! Let go?! How can you say something like that?!  Is our relationship that fragile?!”

“What else do you want me to say?! You come here saying how it might be better for us to think about having a normal family, then so be it! I’ll go a woman right now!”

“If you really mean it, then why don’t you pick up a gun and point it at me then?!”

“Baekhyun--”

“Why don’t you?!”

It wasn’t a question but a challenge. When Baekhyun raises his voice to this extent, with that same glare, Chanyeol knew he was trying to intimidate him. Whenever the circumstances, Baekhyun always has the same glare when he wants something. This sort of power play was not new to either of them. 

Chanyeol picked up the gun from the drawer.Should he point a gun at him? Baekhyun was waiting. If he wouldn’t then that just means he’s submitting himself to Baekhyun’s previous predicaments. Their relationship isn’t fragile. It would take a hundred more bullets to break it down. That’s why, this is nothing.  

Chanyeol raised the gun until it was directly into Baekhyun’s line of sight. They stared at each other. Right now, the security must have already seen through the CCTVs  what was happening and were calling the cops. Anyone would alarmed by something like this. 

Baekhyun wouldn’t budge. He was still staring at him. His breathing was uneven. What exactly was he waiting for? For Chanyeol to shoot at him? Even though that gun isn’t even loaded?

In the end, Chanyeol dropped his arm and hung around the corner, with his head hung low.

“Why did you put the gun down?” Baekhyun demanded. “Chanyeol!”

“I can’t...I can never point a gun at someone important to me, especially the one I love the most. “ Chanyeol replied as he dropped on the floor, leaning against the wall. His head was hung low but Baekhyun can see the tears on his eyes as he wiped them.  “Before I met you, I already knew that I will never be able to love a woman wholeheartedly but I accepted the fact that I still had to get married to one. I knew that only our children would save that kind of marriage. That’s why I’m very fond of children. But ever since I met you and fell in love with you...I threw the idea of having a perfect and normal family away...to be with you.”

Chanyeol was already sobbing. His hands were desperately trying to cover his face at the same time wipe the waterworks away. “How can I make you understand that?”

“Because...it’s my fault, right? Right now, you’re stuck. I know how much you love kids and how much you love your family...that’s why...when I think about how I’m the reason why you can’t have that for yourself, it’s really painful...because I don’t want to selfish...” Baekhyun murmured, trying not to eat his words as the emotions keep piling up inside and his tears drowning him. “But whenever I think about you having a family of your own, and not with me, it really hurts. It felt like I was dying...” He then slowly grabbed Chanyeol’s arm and lifted it up to his chest, so that the gun on his hands are pointing at him from below his chin. “That’s why...I thought that the only way I can let go of you is if you really want me out, so much that you’re willing to point a gun at me and kill me.” 

Chanyeol stared at him. He can see his lips quivering. His hands were shaking even though he’s gripping tightly at Chanyeol’s hand. Chanyeol can see now, how dangerous this kind of love they have actually is. They’ve been avoiding this kind of confrontation but taking it all out on others. That was the purpose of the game and they both knew it. They both knew it so well how they’ll explode, eventually. 

“Idiot.” Chanyeol whispered while slowly pushing their hands down with his other hand. “If I kill you then who’s gonna kill me? If you can’t let go of me, then I can’t let go of you either. We’re just gonna have to  keep holding onto this gun.”

Baekhyun leaned his head against Chanyeol’s and Chanyeol softly caressed his face, wiping off the tears  after holding them in for so long. Then, softly, captured the smaller’s lips, aggressively pushing his tongue in. Baekhyun moaned in surprise. He tried to keep up but he was completely overtaken by Chanyeol. Baekhyun broke off the kiss to breathe. He was gripping Chanyeol’s shirt tightly. He smiled at him, relieved, before falling completely against him, losing his consciousness.

The door slammed open. “What--” Chanyeol turned to Jongdae who was catching his breath. 

“Jongdae? What are you doing here?”

“The security called me, you idiot!” Jongdae answered. “What happened here?” He asked after realizing how trashed the room was. 

Chanyeol placed his finger between his lips, asking Jongdae to keep quiet.

--

When Baekhyun finally came to, he tried opening his eyes but was hit with a headache. “Chanyeol?” He called, voice hoarse. He can feel Chanyeol’s arm by the bed and he can hear turning pages. Chanyeol seemed to be reading a book while sitting on the floor beside the bed.

“Hey, what do you think of the name Nana?”

Baekhyun scoffed with his eyes closed. “For a doll?”

“Okay, then, Annie?”

“From that musical show?”

“What about boy’s names?”

“Boy’s names are better.”

“Hmm, Ethan?”

Baekhyun rolled his eyes, even though his eyes were close. Again with the Ethan. “I don’t know, Chanyeol, don’t ask me. I don’t really like Western names.” He said, trying not to sound so sarcastic.

“So Korean?” Baekhyun nodded. “Jongsuk?”

“Too common, but that actor’s name is also Jongsuk so I guess it’s fine.” Baekhyun particularly liked that actor.

“That’s a no then. Moonsoon?”

“Augh, that person’s gonna get bullied for the rest of their life.”

Chanyeol turned the page quickly. “Jun?”

“Jun is okay. But just Jun is lacking.”

“Hmm, Hyejun?”

“That’s nice. It’s a nice name. Hyejun.”

Chanyeol quickly wrote at the corner of the page. “Does Hyejun remind you of someone?”

“Hm? No? I don’t know anyone with that name. Is it someone you know?”

“Come to think of it...it is someone I know.”

Baekhyun opened his eyes and perked up a little. “It is? Who? Your friend?”

Chanyeol closed the book and moved closer. “Our son.”

“I see.” Baekhyun said, nodding. Then he sat up in surprise. “WHAT?!”

Chanyeol chuckled.

“PARK CHANYEOL THAT IS NOT A GOOD JOKE! I’M REALLY GONNA SHOOT YOU--”

“It’s not, it’s not.” Chanyeol reassured,  waving his hands. Then he fished out a form from his back pocket. “We’re going back to Korea.”

Baekhyun grabbed Chanyeol’s hair in reflex and started shaking around. It was the only thing he could grab at a close distance. “WE’RE GOING BACK TO KOREA!! TO SEOUL!!!”

“Aw, Baek! Let go of my hair!” Chanyeol yelled, feeling the slight pain. Baekhyun suddenly loosened his grip and Chanyeol looked up. Baekhyun was in shock--it seemed to have only registered in his mind now. And then he saw the change in his expression, pouting, and finally the water works.

“Waaah!” Baekhyun whined as the tears continue to fall. 

Chanyeol sat beside him and pulled him closer for an embrace. “I know baby, I know.” He whispered while cooing the emotional Baekhyun. Chanyeol can only imagine how relieved he is and this may honestly be the best decision he has ever made.

A/N:

Hello! This ty author is back ><
First of all, thank you for the 1000 subscribers! YAY!
I'm sorry again for not updating earlier, I suddenly got my hands full with a one-shot.
I just finished it this January, sigh.
Also, I wanted to do a double update but this one took a few turns ohmygod i didn't make it in time :(
I wanted to post before I fly to Manila ><
But I hope you all like it!! <3

Btw, who's going to EXOLUXION this weekend?! See you guys!! :)