Hyukjae's eyes slowly move across the room. He looks at all of the shelves and searches for an open spot. His fingers tap against the carved wooden dragon in his hands and then his eyes come to a stop and he approaches a shelf. He carefully shifts a few items on the shelf before placing the dragon in between them and then he steps back and admires its new home with a small grin.

“A masterpiece,” Ryeowook says from just behind Hyukjae, “as always. I bet someone will buy it in less than a week.”

“That's wishful thinking,” Hyukjae responds. “But you're probably right. My pieces are too awesome to stay in here for any longer than that.”

“You disgust me.” Ryeowook walks away while Hyukjae continues to grin.

“You coming to dinner tonight?” Hyukjae asks, turning to face Ryeowook.

Ryeowook makes his way to the door and flips a sign to let the world know that their shop is closed.

“Of course,” he says. “I thought we were heading out together?”

Hyukjae shrugs. “I'm ready to go when you are.”

Ryeowook locks up the shop while Hyukjae stands outside and holds Ryeowook's coat open for him. Ryeowook practically dives into the coat, claiming that the weather is growing cold far too quickly, and then they start off down the sidewalk together, walking away from the small shop on the corner known as Kim's Crafts.

-

Every Friday evening finds a group of six friends gathered together for dinner at a restaurant called Sunny and Luna's. Hyukjae, Ryeowook, Sungmin, Tiffany, Sunny, and Luna sit together at the same table every week to catch up and wind down.

Hyukjae approaches the restaurant with Ryeowook, passing under the sign adorned with a sun and moon to enter. Sunny and Luna close the restaurant every Friday night just to allow a private dinner between friends. Hyukjae looks around and finds that he and Ryeowook are the first to arrive. The noises and muffled voices from the kitchen tell him that Sunny and Luna are still cooking.

“Your guests are arriving!” Hyukjae calls out playfully. He takes a seat at the usual table with Ryeowook.

“We're almost done in here!” Sunny calls back. Hyukjae notices a significant increase in clanging noises after that.

The interior of the restaurant is colorful and warm. The wooden walls are covered in paintings made by artists from around the town and the wooden tables are complimented by the various colorful chairs that accompany them. Hyukjae had helped with the decorating when Sunny and Luna were struggling to keep their new establishment afloat. Hyukjae feels quite proud knowing that customers often compliment the design of the restaurant.

“Food's ready!” Luna yells, bursting out of the kitchen with plates balanced on her arms. She places them on the table with practiced grace and then flops down next to Hyukjae with a sigh before leaning her head on his shoulder.

“Hey there,” Hyukjae says, rubbing Luna's shoulder, “long day?”

“Long week,” Luna responds. “Glad it's over.”

Sunny adds several plates to the table and sits down next to Ryeowook.

“Wait,” she says, “where are-”

Sungmin walks through the door with Tiffany trailing behind before Sunny can finish asking where they are. Hyukjae is already too busy eating to notice the looks of bemusement on their faces.

“Are you guys okay?” Ryeowook asks.

“Yeah...” Sungmin replies. “It's just... we saw something... weird out there.”

“We're probably both too hungry to see properly,” Tiffany says quickly, nudging Sungmin towards the table.

“What was it?” Sunny asks, eyes wide.

Tiffany laughs as she and Sungmin take their seats. “Nothing,” she says. “Honestly, it must have just been a trick of the light or something. Right, Sungmin?”

Sungmin nods and occupies himself with food to keep from answering.

“You guys are both weird,” Hyukjae says, mouth full of food.

Tiffany and Sungmin share a nervous glance before looking down at their plates.

“So,” Luna starts, “anybody have good gossip this week?”

The table goes silent while everyone thinks.

“Oh,” Ryeowook says, turning the table's attention towards him, “I'm pretty sure Hyukjae is a demon or a wizard or something. He carved a dragon out of wood in a day and it looks awesome.”

His “gossip” is met with eye rolls and sighs.

“We all know Hyukjae is magical,” Luna says. Sungmin nods. Hyukjae grins around the broccoli in his mouth. “Anyone else?”

“I beat my high score at Tetris yesterday,” Sungmin offers.

“I bought a new pair of shoes,” Tiffany tries to contribute.

“In other words, it's been another slow week,” Luna concludes.

The conversation drifts around after that, giving everyone time to complain and joke and console one another on the week's hardships. When all of the food has been eaten and all of the week's catching up has been done, the six friends part ways and return to their own lives for another week.

Hyukjae walks home in the dark, breathing in the refreshing cool air. He doesn't live far from the restaurant and arrives at his house within only a few short minutes. He steps inside and is greeted by a familiar, comfortable silence. He kicks off his shoes and hangs up his coat before heading straight up the stairs. He brushes his teeth in the bathroom, making sure to remove all of the broccoli from his teeth, and then he heads to his room where he puts his pajamas on and tosses his clothes into his laundry hamper.

Finally, Hyukjae crawls into his cold bed, shifting around until he starts to feel warm. His eyes are wide open, staring at nothing. He allows himself a small, tired smile before he closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep.

-

Hyukjae is woken by a fuzzy weather broadcast coming from his alarm clock. He'd forgotten to turn off his alarm but at least now he knows that it will be a cloudy and possibly rainy day today. He stays in bed for just one more hour before he gets up and takes a long, hot shower.

Deciding to dress in his most comfortable clothing, Hyukjae pulls a cream sweater from his closet and pairs it with his favorite sweatpants. He puts on a pair of simple, white socks to help battle the cold wooden floors and then he heads downstairs, deciding that today is the perfect day for lots of food and lots of television.

It's halfway through a hefty plate of scrambled eggs and twelve minutes into a morning news show that Hyukjae hears a knock on his door. He mutes the television and puts down his plate of eggs.

“Coming!” he calls out, untangling himself from a blanket and hastily shuffling to the front door.

Hyukjae opens the door and his body freezes. His entire world becomes silent. He can't hear the rain splashing against the ground or the car driving by on the street. All of his focus is on his sense of sight. His eyes are wide open, staring at something impossible.

“Donghae,” Hyukjae whispers. His hand falls from the doorknob and he continues to stare, unblinking. “Y-you... you're dead. You're not here, you're dead.”

Donghae is staring back, a look of pure anguish on his face.

“Hyukjae,” he says. “Hyukjae, I... I'm so sorry.”

“You're dead,” Hyukjae repeats, loudly this time. He starts to back away from the door, shaking. “You died. You're dead. This isn't real.”

Donghae steps forward hesitantly, his face now filled with worry.

“No, Hyukjae, I can explain. I'm alive. I'll... I'll explain everything, okay? But you need to calm down.”

“I was at your funeral! I was at your grave just last month! You're dead! We buried you!”

Hyukjae is shaking intensely. He can't breathe. His throat feels sore from only a few words. Donghae keeps talking but Hyukjae doesn't want to hear. He puts his hands over his ears.

“No!” he screams. “You're not real! You're not here! You can't be!”

Hyukjae's breathing becomes shallow and rapid. His lungs feel tired and his head is spinning. Slowly, Hyukjae loses all of his senses and his world goes black.

-

Donghae carries Hyukjae upstairs and places him in bed. Then he swiftly removes his hands from Hyukjae's body. He tries not to think about the way Hyukjae feels in his arms because Hyukjae isn't someone that he deserves to hold. He tries even harder not to think about how this house used to be theirs and that they used to share this bedroom.

Afraid to look around, afraid to see what has changed, Donghae hesitantly glances around the room. The furniture is all still there but the bed frame is new and Hyukjae's desk is in a different corner than it used to be. Everything is still black and white minus the splashes of color provided by the paintings and pictures on the wall.

Just as Donghae's eyes are roaming over familiar pictures that contain his own face, he hears movement. He turns his head to find that Hyukjae's eyes are open and staring right at him. Slowly, Hyukjae sits up. Donghae doesn't move so that he doesn't startle Hyukjae.

“I'm dreaming, right?” Hyukjae asks, voice hoarse and shaky. He tears his eyes away from Donghae and closes them. Donghae ignores the tight pain in his chest that he feels just from the hurt expression on Hyukjae's face.

“No,” Donghae responds quietly, watching Hyukjae's hand curl against the bed sheets, “you're not dreaming.”

“Then I'm crazy,” Hyukjae says quickly, loudly.

“You're not crazy,” Donghae says back. He takes a step closer to the bed and Hyukjae scrambles to get up and back away.

“There is no other explanation.” Hyukjae is shaking again. “People don't just come back from the dead.”

“I never died,” Donghae tries to explain. “I know there was a funeral. I know what you went through but-”

“You don't know what I went through,” Hyukjae snaps. He's shaking more now. “You... I know you're dead. You can't be alive.”

As soon as Donghae tries to take another step forward, Hyukjae turns and runs to the small bathroom attached to the bedroom. He locks himself inside.

Donghae is terrified. He'd expected a punch in the face; he'd never imagined that Hyukjae would break down like this. Cautiously, he sits down next to the bathroom door. He hears Hyukjae's rapid breathing on the other side.

“Hyukjae,” he says softly. He hears a stifled sob in return. “You're not crazy. You're not dreaming. I'm... I'm not dead. It's me, it's Donghae. I'm here.”

“Go away,” Hyukjae whispers just loud enough for Donghae to hear.

Unsure of what he should do, Donghae looks around nervously. He spots Hyukjae's cell phone on the bedside table.

“I'm not going anywhere,” he says. “I'm not leaving you again.”

He stands up and makes his way to the phone. He flips through contacts until he finds the one he's looking for. He begins to write out a text.

“I need you to come over. It's an emergency.”

He sends the text and then he waits. Hyukjae stays locked in the bathroom and Donghae becomes increasingly worried until he hears fervent knocking on the front door. Without wasting a second, Donghae speeds to the front door and opens it.

“I knew it,” Sungmin says. The shocked look on his face contradicts his words. “I knew I saw you. Last night, in front of the restaurant... it was you, wasn't it?”

Donghae takes in Sungmin's facial features, wondering how he can still look exactly the same. He nods.

“How?” Sungmin asks, stepping inside and looking Donghae up and down. “How are you... alive?”

“I'll explain everything,” Donghae says, closing the door and locking it. “I promise I will but I need you to help Hyukjae.”

Sungmin shakes off his confusion and immediately becomes concerned. “What happened to him?”

“He doesn't think I'm real,” Donghae explains. “It's like he can't decide if his eyes are right in telling him that I'm here or if his mind is right in telling him that I'm not. He locked himself in the bathroom to get away from me and he won't come out.”

Sungmin takes a deep breath to compose himself. He glances up the stairs and looks back at Donghae.

“When you... died... it took Hyukjae a long time to be okay again. He didn't want to believe you were really gone. Now... after all the time it's taken him to realize you really were gone... it's no wonder he doesn't believe you're here.”

Donghae thinks he could fall over and die right here just by imagining the pain he'd caused Hyukjae. But he stands his ground and places a hand on a still bewildered Sungmin's shoulder.

“I need you to help him,” he says softly. “I need you to get him out of there and then I'll explain how all of this happened.”

Sungmin looks into the eyes of his old friend, recognizing the deepness in them, saddened by the pain he sees.

“Okay,” Sungmin says. “I can try.”

Sungmin walks upstairs and into the bedroom. He sits down next to the door while Donghae stands on the opposite side of the room. Sungmin takes another deep breath before he speaks.

“Hyukjae? It's me, Sungmin. Are you okay?”

“No,” is Hyukjae's shaky reply. “I don't think I'm okay.”

“I need you to listen to me,” Sungmin says as gently as he can. “Hyukjae, Donghae is here. I know you think he died, I thought so, too. But he really is here. He's alive.”

There's a moment of silence before Sungmin hears a small cry come from inside the bathroom.

“How?” Hyukjae asks, voice strained. “How is that possible?”

“I don't know, Hyukjae.” Sungmin looks up at Donghae briefly, still astonished to know that he's alive. “Honestly, I don't. But if you come out, Donghae can explain it to both of us, okay?”

The silence is longer this time. Then the door handle turns slowly. Sungmin stands up and the door in front of him opens, revealing a distraught Hyukjae.

“Hey,” Sungmin says, immediately embracing Hyukjae, “it's okay.”

Hyukjae returns Sungmin's embrace and when he catches his breath, he turns his head, looking straight at Donghae. Donghae looks away, unable to hold Hyukjae's gaze.

“Can you please explain this to us now?” Sungmin asks.

Donghae looks back to find Hyukjae staring at the ground. He looks to Sungmin and nods.

“You probably already know... I was being held as a hostage.” Donghae pauses when both Sungmin and Hyukjae visibly become tense. “We'd been investigating for months and when we finally found who we were after... my partner and I went in without backup. We underestimated the situation and he... he was killed. They kept me as leverage, to make sure the police wouldn't barge in and put me at risk. I was in that building for days. I heard everything they said, learned all of their plans and the locations of their hideouts. I knew they'd only talk about it in front of me if they were planning to kill me. Luckily, they'd only tied me up with rope and I managed to loosen it enough to slip my hands out. I watched them rig the place with explosives and as soon as they made their escape through an exit tunnel, I ran. I barely made it out in time but... I did make it out.”

Silence fills the room and the only sound comes from the raindrops pounding against the roof. Sungmin looks over to see Hyukjae still staring at the ground, emotionless. He rubs Hyukjae's arm comfortingly and then turns to Donghae.

“That doesn't explain why you were gone for two years,” he says. “Why didn't you... why didn't you come back? Why didn't you tell us you were alive?”

Donghae takes a deep breath and then exhales. “I wanted to,” he says quietly, barely audible over the sound of the rain. “I really wanted to. I thought about coming home every single day. But I wasn't allowed. I was put into a protection program. They needed to keep me alive in reality and dead on paper. With my knowledge, they were able to send an undercover team to infiltrate. If I would have come home, the enemy would have found out. They would have known their operation was jeopardized and they would have come after me... and you.” Donghae stops to let out a shaky breath and closes his eyes. “I couldn't take that risk. Even if I hurt myself and others by staying away, I couldn't come back and let them hurt my family or my friends.”

Donghae looks up to see that Hyukjae is looking at him. Hyukjae's eyes are still filled with immense pain and Donghae feels nothing but guilt. Hyukjae takes a few slow steps forward. He stops just in front of Donghae and examines Donghae's body and face.

“I'm sorry,” Hyukjae says softly. “I'm sorry that all of that happened to you.”

Donghae quickly shakes his head. “I don't deserve sympathy from anyone. I'm the one who needs to make apologies. And... I have a lot of them to make.”

“You're right,” Hyukjae says, nodding his head slightly, “you do.”

Hyukjae leaves the room. Donghae watches him go.

“Donghae,” Sungmin calls gently when Donghae's eyes stay fixed on the door. Donghae turns to Sungmin and tries to hide the emptiness he feels. “Donghae, he... you just have to understand that he hurt so much when you left... he couldn't even function. We all had a hard time but he didn't know how to go on. Eventually he did but it wasn't easy. And now that you're back I don't think he knows what to do.”

“I understand,” Donghae says hoarsely. “Which is why I can't even look at him. I want to hold him so badly but I don't deserve to even be around him after what I've done to him.”

Sungmin looks heartbroken just from listening to Donghae's voice. He sighs and steps forward to hug Donghae tightly. Donghae returns the hug, finding comfort in friendly arms. Sungmin eventually backs away, still holding onto Donghae. He smiles.

“For what it's worth,” he says, “I'm really glad you're not dead.”

Donghae manages to smile back. He looks down, preparing to heave a sigh when he looks at his own hand and catches a golden glint. He lifts his left hand, staring at the golden band on his ring finger.

“Sungmin... does he...”

Sungmin looks at the ring and then he gives Donghae a sad look.

“All I know is that his therapist made him take it off.”

Donghae nods, letting his hand fall to his side again.

“I guess I should... I dunno, get out of his hair. Maybe get a motel.”

“Nonsense,” Sungmin says loudly and then lowers his voice. “You can stay with me.”

Donghae smiles. “I'd appreciate that.”

Sungmin and Donghae descend the stairs and find Hyukjae sitting at the kitchen table, mindlessly picking at its smooth surface.

“Hey Hyukjae,” Sungmin says, startling him, “we're gonna go.”

“Oh,” Hyukjae replies, standing awkwardly from his chair. “Okay.”

Sungmin glances at Donghae and then turns to walk away, leaving Donghae and Hyukjae alone. Donghae steps forward, spotting Hyukjae's bare ring finger before looking away. Hyukjae freezes up and Donghae feels guilty all over again.

“I want you to know something,” Donghae says. “I had an agent assigned to protect me and I couldn't do anything without his permission. As soon as he told me that I was safe to live my life again, I rushed here. I was so scared to see you again and I hesitated but... your door was the first one I knocked on. I haven't even told my family yet.”

When Hyukjae doesn't respond, Donghae starts to turn away.

“Your mom doesn't know?” Hyukjae asks suddenly. Donghae turns back to see a concerned look on his face.

“No... why?”

“She's so fragile,” Hyukjae says. “You can't just show up at her door and expect everything to be fine. If I... fainted when I saw you, what do you think your mother will do?”

Donghae is overwhelmed just by the sound of Hyukjae's voice. He doesn't even know how to respond.

“When are you going to tell her?” Hyukjae asks, seemingly frustrated.

“Uh... I'm not sure. As soon as possible, I guess. I don't want to stay away from her any longer.”

Hyukjae's expression softens and he sighs. “I'm coming with you,” he says, walking to the stairs.

“Wait, what? Why?” Donghae asks, alarmed.

“Because she needs someone to soften the blow. If I tell her what's happened, it'll be easier. She won't have to think she's insane and pass out on the floor.”

The burning look Hyukjae gives is enough to make Donghae cower. But as Hyukjae walks up the stairs, Donghae can only feel glad that Hyukjae had actually talked to him.

-

This isn't how it was supposed to happen, Donghae thinks as he rides in Sungmin's car with Hyukjae in the backseat. I was supposed to come back and be welcomed with hugs and spend the day wrapped up in Hyukjae's arms. Not... in his glares. He glances in the mirror for the nth time and sees the anger painted on Hyukjae's face. This isn't how it was supposed to happen at all. 

“This is it, right?” Sungmin asks, pulling his car into the driveway of a small, blue house.

“Yeah,” Donghae says, wiping his already sweaty palms on his pants.

Hyukjae doesn't waste time. He exits the car and heads to the front door. Donghae ducks in his seat, watching as the door opens. His heart pounds in his chest and he tries to remember how to breathe as he catches a glimpse of someone standing in the doorway. The glimpse disappears inside along with Hyukjae and he lets out a held breath before slumping in his seat.

“So Hyukjae doesn't seem happy,” Sungmin observes. “He also seems to be in a hurry.”

Donghae rubs his face. “He's only doing this for my mom. As soon as he knows she's okay, he'll get out of here as soon as possible just to get away from me.”

Sungmin cringes because he knows that it's true. Hyukjae doesn't want to be around Donghae. He doesn't know how to be around Donghae. But he does know how to be around Donghae's mother. He knows that he loves her and that he'd walk through broken glass to keep her safe. Donghae just happens to be a bit of broken glass that Hyukjae has to deal with in order to help Donghae's mother.

Sungmin is about to comfort Donghae but the front door opens again and Donghae's mother rushes out of the house, looking around frantically. Donghae jumps out of the car and pauses briefly when they see each other. Then he sprints towards her, enveloping her in his arms as she cries against him. Donghae looks up to see Hyukjae walking towards the sidewalk with Sungmin running after him. Sungmin stops Hyukjae and they exchange a few words before Sungmin nods and Hyukjae walks away. Donghae wants to stop him but he doesn't. He closes his eyes and clings to the mother he's missed dearly for two years.

-

Hyukjae slowly sits down on the couch where he'd been early in the morning. The television is still muted and the room is eerily silent. He stares down at his cold plate of half-eaten scrambled eggs and the only thing he can think about is the way Donghae used to make him breakfast as an apology for leaving in the middle of the night because of a case.

Gripping the plate tightly, Hyukjae walks into the kitchen. He scrapes the eggs into the trash and takes the plate to the sink. He turns on the hot water and suddenly all he can think about is how Donghae always volunteered to do the dishes, even after a long day at work. He remembers days when Donghae would refuse to let Hyukjae step anywhere near the kitchen sink. Hyukjae is lost in his thoughts and hardly realizes that he's furiously scrubbing the plate and that his hands are red from the hot water.

He frantically turns the sink off and silence fills his ears again. Now, the only thing that Hyukjae can think about is the fact that his life is upside down all over again.

-