He felt the weight of every tiny mistake he had made, of every flaw in his life, of his self loathing and mental conditions, of the way he’d been treated by his closest brothers and the way he’d grown up. He felt a sudden wave of his deepest darkest moments and a rush of sorrow and hatred. He had held everything in for so long, for too long, and he was driving himself to the point of insanity. He couldn’t take it any longer. But of course nobody would listen. He only had himself, all alone, and not even he himself was trustworthy enough for his own secrets, his own pain. He needed someone, just one person, and nobody could care enough to be that person he required. So, of course, it only got worse.

To the point where he found himself on the edge of a bridge with a thirty foot drop.

The tears, the hurt, the pain, the heartache, the longing, the urge, the sadness, heck even the goddamned blood, had all been experienced too many times before. He had no tears left to shed, no pain left to be felt, no whole heart left to break. His face was left pale, his auburn hair sweaty in the wind from running and his legs shaking as he stood on the edge. Thirty feet below, the deep murky water was swaying with the current. The familiar sensation of adrenalin rushed through his veins as he stared at his feet, preparing himself. There’s nothing to be scared of. Just do it you wimp.

He thought over the previous morning. The way his brothers ignored his existence. The way his heart ached like usual. The way he could be hurt and say “Oh no, it’s fine. I’m used to it.” The amount of blood he had shed. At that thought, his arm tingled, and he looked at it. Reaching his hand up to his left wrist, he caressed his endless number of scars, and reviewed his legs and body. Everywhere. They’re everywhere, you monster. Nobody wants a self-harmer in the world. Nobody would ever love someone who cuts up their arms and legs to calm themselves. Why did I ever start doing this?! Why can’t I be thin or attractive or healthy or happy or – His thoughts were interrupted with sudden tears. His face went numb, the wet tears on his face clashing with the cold air caused him to have a sudden outburst of goosebumps, but more tears continued to fall. He pushed himself closer to the edge. Cars drove by but never stopped to restrain him. He knew nobody cared. He asked himself why he even hoped they would. It was pointless.

With all these thoughts flowing through his head, he stepped forward and took a deep, sharp breath.

And he jumped.

The feeling of sudden weightlessness. The feeling of carelessness. The feeling of being forgotten. The feeling of isolation. The feeling of solitude. The feeling of falling, the air whipping against his back, rain beginning to join him in his descent, as he let go of the past, the memories, the hate, the sorrow, the urge, the blood, the pain, the tears, the sleepless nights, the anxiety, the sadness. And finally, the last minature lingering strand of life that remained in his blackened, dark heart, was extinguished as he drew his last, shallow breath.

He shut his eyes.

And just let go.

A/N: Okay so read the foreword please.

tahnks again for reading. this isnt edited so please comment any mistakes you found ^.^

-kisu x.x