Jiha bit her tongue during the entire car ride back to her family’s apartment. Her mother looked at her occasionally in the rear view mirror, but Jiha did her best to never meet her mother’s gaze. She already knew what was coming her way as soon as they were inside the apartment unit. Their car pulled into their designated parking spot and Jiha made sure to be out of the car first so that her mother would have a small chance of actually getting to talk to her. 

“Jiha, wait for me,” her mother called out as she locked the car. But Jiha just continued walking into the building. She even opted out of using the elevator, in order to lessen the chance that she’d be alone with her mother in the elevator. She opted for the stairs, even though her family lived on the tenth level and she’d have to ascend twenty flights to get there. Whatever it took to avoid a confrontation. It took about fifteen minutes to ascend all the stairs, and when she got to their front door, it was already open. She could hear the hum of a TV station from the inside, along with the sound of dishes clashing as they went into the dishwasher. Jiha held her breath as she entered the house. As soon as she did, the TV was turned off and the clanking of dishes stopped. Jiha continued walking until she was stopped by her mother’s voice.

“So what have you to say for yourself this time?” her mother demanded. Jiha stopped in her tracks and turned around slowly, not showing any emotions on her face.

“About what?” Jiha asked coyly. Her father sat up on the couching, eyeing her with the same look of disappointment that her mother was giving her. Jiha sighed. 

“I don’t know why you’re all so upset,” she said. “It’s not like I got arrested or anything; she just escorted me to the station so you could pick me up. So Min’s friend was the one doing all the driving anyway. It’s no big deal.”

“It is a big deal when you indirectly cause a three-car pile up!” her mother said, raising her voice. Jiha and So Min, after being kicked out of the autograph event had opted to go out back to the VIP exit to see if they could get another peak at EXO. That was where So Min met up with a friend of hers, who drove a taxi. He was off-duty at the time he offered to give them a ride to stalk EXO in their vans. He was weaving through traffic and had indirectly caused a few minor collisions. They were picked up by highway patrol shortly after they took the exit leading to Apgujeong. Jiha rolled her eyes.

“Well… I’m fine,” she said. 

“What is the matter with you?” her father asked this time. “You have got to stop this deranged hobby of yours, Jiha. It’s destructive, it’s dangerous, and I gotta be honest with you, it’s just plain delusional!”

“You’re grades are failing, you’re boss just called to complain today, you’re hardly home,” her mother continued. “Jiha, what’s gotten into you? I get it, you like a certain band, that’s normal. But what’s not normal is the way you’ve been acting!”

“You promised us this was just a harmless hobby, but it obviously isn’t anymore.”

“Jiha, what you’re doing isn’t normal. You’re acting like a crazy person.”

Jiha felt like a knife was being pushed into her chest. Unwilling to hear anything more that these people had to say, Jiha chose to ignore everything else. She turned and marched straight to her room, shutting out her parents’ voice. She slammed the door, locking herself in her room. Once inside, Jiha let out a jagged breath and tried to keep herself from crying. How could these people, who claimed to love and support her, say such horrible things? How could they disdain something that made her so happy? If they were really her parents, they would be supportive of her endeavors, not trying to put her down or judge her for something that made her smile. Jiha clenched her eyes for a moment, trying to drown out the sound of her parents talking through her door. When she opened them again, she looked around her bedroom. The walls used to be so lonely and bare before; now they were lined wall-to-wall with posters and pictures of Kai and his beautiful smile. Jiha needed only to look around her room and know that there was at least one person who would understand, one person who would love her. Jiha walked up to one poster, a picture of Kai in a yellow shirt, and she instantly felt better, being near him. Couldn’t her parents see the calming effect that Kai had on her? Didn’t they see how much happier she was now that she had dedicated her life to something? Whenever she had a bad day, all Jiha had to do was look around her room or watch a music video or listen to a song, and the world was instantly a better place. And that was more than she could say about most other people in her life. How could something like that be considered delusional or crazy? Was it crazy to want the person you love to know you love him? Jiha couldn’t understand. 

She sat down at her desk and turned her computer on. Never mind that she still had homework to do or work in an hour. At a time like this, it was best to just put negative thoughts and focus on what really mattered in her life: Kai. 

Three and a half hours later, it had started to rain. Jiha was fully immersed in videos of Kai: music videos, reality show clips, videos of him on variety shows and game shows, videos of him arriving at airports, at hotels, behind the scenes at concerts, even a few of him putting his bag in the overhead compartment of an airplane. Jiha couldn’t even tell how long she had spent just looking at his face and listening to his voice. She couldn’t even begin to say how much longer she would voluntarily go on doing so. But at that very moment, her phone chimed with a new message from So Min. Jiha paused the video to read So Min’s message, which asked her if she wanted to do a “night shift” in front of the EXO dorm. Jiha smiled.