Ten Ways Of Courting Brat Luhan - A Guide By Oh Sehun ft. Troublemakers eunhae

When Hyukjae decides to formulate a new plan for Sehun to have another attempt at wooing Luhan (or in Hyukjae's words “the faery-like boy who’s never going to notice you”), Sehun becomes sceptical.

“Are you sure? Abstholutely thcertain?” Sehun queries, not wanting to take any chances on ruining his most likely last slot with courting Luhan, especially if this advice is from the stupid Hyukjae. Last time he came to Hyukjae for help, those pickup lines made Luhan very cross with him. The boy with baby pink hair is still sending his most evil look; implying the hidden message that Hyukjae will be killed if this isn't successful.

When a sudden chill barely passed down his spine, Hyukjae's body jolts unwillingly and he looks up. Sehun looks like a growling puppy, especially with the colour of his hair. It hardly makes the younger look fierce. Resisting a chuckle, Hyukjae smacks Sehun across the back out of the blue, the sound crisp in his ears.

“OWW! YOU ALMOST KILLED ME YOU !”

On hearing this outburst, Hyukjae explodes with laughter, his body convulsing so much that his hands have to clutch his stomach to hold onto something at least. Hyukjae finds that ticking Sehun off is very amusing, and that his insults doesn’t even bother him the slightest.

After calming down, Hyukjae retorts with a smirk. “Do you still want my help? If you do, shut up and follow me. We need to visit a special someone for this preparation.”

•••

Turns out, the special someone Hyukjae was being mysterious about is no other than Donghae. Sehun even thought that the route to the stranger’s house is familiar — it’s actually Donghae's shared dorm. Tch, sneaky Hyukjae. Donghae's hot roommate, Siwon, opened the door for the two to go inside and wait and immediately Sehun and Hyukjae scrambled into the warmth.

Now, the two sat on Donghae's bed — the slightly messier side compared to Siwon's, but still relatively neat — and Sehun uses this chance to look around in mild awkwardness. Just where the hell is Donghae? Hyukjae is tapping away on his phone with fingers moving a hundred miles per second as Korean characters appear on the screen; it’s obvious that he’s texting someone — probably Donghae, those two are inseparable, whilst Sehun observes Siwon. The younger doesn’t come round to Donghae's dorm often because that’s where all the second years are located and to be frank they are scary. Furthermore, the trio tends to hang out in little quaint cafés and the library or visit parks, and now reflecting back Sehun believes they crash at his place more than they do at Donghae's or Hyukjae’s. Frowning, Sehun makes a mental reminder, that is certain to be forgotten by an airhead like him, to raise his opinion in this say which will hopefully cut down on the frequency of him having to welcome the two older hyungs into his small and cramped room. (And because, the mess they make is a pain in the arse to clean up afterwards by himself.)

Sehun watches quietly as Siwon disappears into the bathroom half (does he not feel shy with two almost-strangers staring at his every move and tanned torso? (Well to be honest if Sehun had his body he would walk around all the time just to show off)) only to re-emerge fully clothed and hair styled, looking like he is on the run. Siwon tucks his thumbs into the empty jean pockets in the back as his fingers taps rhythmically on his perky a few times, his expression one of contemplation, before spotting his car keys and speedily putting on a jacket and grabbing the keys to tuck into his pocket. He turns to Hyukjae and Sehun suddenly, making the boy break his eye contact out of guilt (why Sehun is guilty in the first place he does not know) as he looks down, his interlaced fingers much more interesting. Sehun only looks up again when Siwon speaks in his smooth voice.

“I'm so sorry guys, but I have a date tonight and I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave now. You’ll be alright here alone waiting for Hae right?” The buff male has an apologetic look on his face as Hyukjae answers with a light smile.

“No, it’s fine! You go ahead and enjoy your date.”

Siwon breathes a sigh of relief and waves goodbye at the front door. “Bye guys! Please inform Donghae I’ll be back by ten!” And then the door clicks shut.

The two sit on each end of Donghae's bed, both sporting a dumbfounded expression as boredom tolls on. Sehun is reduced to a lanky mess sprawling out on the cool duvet and cradling Donghae's pillow, his eyes beginning to feel drowsy and tired. Hyukjae, on seeing Sehun looking like he’s about to fall asleep any second now, kicks the younger on the shin in hopes of the action serving as a wake up call. It does, because Sehun yelps immediately as his eyes shoot open.

“Yah! Don’t you dare fall asleep on me!”

“But hyung!” Sehun drags out the word trying to sound somewhat cute, but apparently it does not have an effect on Hyukjae. The elder must be immune to it. “When is Donghae hyung going to be back anyway?”

Hyukjae snorts and sits up quickly, crossing his legs to face Sehun. “I have no idea, really. Where could he be this late at night?” The sandy-brown haired male rubs his chin thoughtfully, phone forgotten.

“It’s only just past thsixth in the evening, it’s not late. And weren’t you texting him moments ago?” Sehun deadpans.

“Could he be meeting his other friends? But he sees them in lectures everyday, so why would he spend his weekend with them? And I was texting someone else, actually.”

“Maybe hyung isth out on a date.” Sehun decides to tease Hyukjae. He sees the other’s face twitch as a frown comes on. Hyukjae has his eyebrows furrowing in what appears to be great political concerns but in reality the male is just evaluating the idea of his childhood best friend going out on a date. The usually large and muddy brown orbs are tightening into slits. From his lack of smile and austerity posture — his back rigid and firm — Sehun assumes there is more than a feeling of friendship between the two.

Hyukjae suddenly barks out a chuckle, although to Sehun's eyes and ears it looks and sounds forced. “Maybe,” Then after a considerable pause, he continues, “I guess our fishy is desirable to a few out there.”

“It’s not just a few, it’s many, for your information.” Startled, Sehun and Hyukjae look up to see Donghae toeing off his shoes; his face is red and his breath short and raspy and Sehun could almost see steam shooting out. The male’s eyes are glistening and appear very wet and magical under the poorly lit orange glow, and they both watch Donghae walk in and drop several plastic bags bulging with convenience store items onto the floor. Huffing from the excessive exercise, Donghae shrugs out of his coat and collapses on top of Hyukjae, his legs also resting on Sehun.

Hyukjae groans and tries to push Donghae off, since the boy is heavy, but Donghae only sticks onto him even more.

“Hae…” Hyukjae whines.

Donghae rolls his eyes. “This is what you get for talking behind my back.”

Sehun laughs, clearly entertained but Donghae does the same to Sehun by shoving a foot and resting it on Sehun's thigh. “You're no better! You were talking about me as well.”

“Hyung! I defended you! I thswear!” On hearing this, Donghae lowers his legs onto the empty space. Somehow, the three have managed to tangle themselves like the intricate patterns on pastries, and begin laughing. Once the commotion in the room dies down, Donghae sighs contentedly; one of his hand reaching over to the mop of fluffy hair on Hyukjae's head. It is soft near the roots, and slightly dry at the tips due to the dying and constant colour change of his hair. Donghae is pretty sure Sehun and Hyukjae are having competitions to see who can ruin their hair first from changing it to colours of the rainbow.

“So, what’s the occasion?” Donghae darts his sight left and right between the two troublemakers, Sehun and Hyukjae. “You can't jut visit me for no reason at all.”  

“What if I say I missed you?” Hyukjae shifts and promptly flips himself from under Donghae's weight, arms on either side of the latter’s head; effectively trapping Donghae underneath him. Disregarding Sehun's presence, who is, at this point, enjoying the transpiration of events. Hyukjae has miraculously climbed over Donghae's still frame, and nobody knows what is going through Donghae's head. The close proximity has Donghae gulping, his eyes shifting uneasily between Hyukjae's body that’s only coming nearer and nearer and his handsome facial profile.

“Uhh…” Donghae tries to regain some of his brain cells, but their legs are pressing snugly and their bodies fit like a jigsaw puzzle, and Hyukjae's light cologne is really making his head dizzy. The shorter male tries to push the male above him away, to put some sort of barrier to this subjugation. Hyukjae's frisky side is coming out, and now Donghae kind of regret teasing the male earlier now. Look who’s been teased now, his mind combats.

Hyukjae uses the time that Donghae is frozen to test to see how much he can tease Donghae. Inching closer — so close that Hyukjae has to pin the arms Donghae raised out of the way, the male on top precedes to press his chest to Donghae's and aligning their bodies together; leaving no space for imaginations. At this point, Donghae's breaths are coming out in shallow huffs, his sight slanting towards the door, mind wishing for an escape but body confined underneath Hyukjae's. Leaning in, Hyukjae tauntingly brushes the tip of his nose along Donghae's jawline, barely skimming over the smooth surface yet leaving a trail of raised goose bumps.

“What would you do…” The male pinning Donghae down murmurs huskily, satin-like voice flowing into the younger’s ears like melted chocolate, “if I am to kiss you right now?”

Seeing his hyung so helpless, and seeing Hyukjae's playboy persona come out, Sehun is about to interfere (and potentially saving Hyukjae from being eternally damned into hell) when Donghae seems to have gained his senses, because a second later, Hyukjae is shoved off of the boy brutally and ends up falling on his flat . Sehun couldn’t help but laugh sharply, because the expression on Hyukjae's face is too humorous.

“Next time I’ll just slap you if you ever do that again. Don’t test my patience okay?” Donghae threatens, although a prominent blush is still visible. However, Sehun is the only one who notices. Hyukjae is too busy rubbing his sore and mumbling to himself to notice.

“Anyway,” Sehun intrudes, and Donghae — as if just realising that there had been another witness to the crime Hyukjae committed — widens his eyes shockingly, lips parted yet no coherent words form. His eyes seem to plead for Sehun to ignore what had just occurred, and Sehun nods hoping to convey his message. “Whatever the hell happened then, I’ll pretend I didn’t see it.” Donghae sends him a small smile, albeit it is a little tight-lipped.

“Hyukjae hyung said that you can help us with something.”

Confused, Donghae points a finger at himself. “Me?” A look of disbelief springs across his features.

“Well,” Hyukjae clarifies the subject further; “Sehun needs your help in wooing the Chinese student in our year, Luhan.”

With that statement, Donghae couldn’t help but raise his eyebrows in suspicion. It’s safe to say that from his years of expertise on his best friend’s character and from their shared experiences, Hyukjae needing his help is usually not a good thing. “And how do I come into this?” Sehun merely shrugs off the responsibility of answering because frankly, he doesn’t have a clue either. Instead, the boy gestures to Hyukjae with a sly smile on his lips.

Donghae, following his direction of guidance, turns to meet Hyukjae's face.

“Care to explain? Monkey?”

“Long story short: since the two previous tips on wooing Luhan didn’t work, this time — based on my fruitful dating experience — food should help in the process of wooing a person.” The proud look on Hyukjae's face is akin to a child answering a maths question correct.

“And let me guess, this is why your relationships didn’t last long.” Donghae and Sehun both snicker behind their hands, watching Hyukjae's complexion turn into a shade of embarrassment.

“Well, you’re helping us bake cookies.”

The retort from Hyukjae has Donghae stop laughing. “What? Me? Why should I? Do you see that pile of assignments I'm supposed to be completing right now?” As Donghae speaks, the male points towards his study desk with paper placed chaotically everywhere.

On hearing this, Sehun loses hope. If his hyung doesn’t want to help, then the chance of him winning over Luhan is even smaller than non-existent.

Sehun hears Donghae sigh and realises it’s all over. Until Donghae says, “Fine. But I'm only doing this for Sehun, so stop looking so smug, monkey.”

Either way, Sehun is still thankful.

•••

3. Food is the way to a woman’s heart (suggested by Hyukjae)

After going out to buy more materials for making cookies, it was already some time past seven by the time the three are situated in the communal kitchen, a level above the floor Donghae shared dorm room. It’s a typical Saturday for university students to call for takeaways and pizza, so nobody is using the kitchen by the time the trio barges in noisily.

Sehun's head of blush pink is the only visible part of the boy that is above the huge plastic bag in his arms, and it could be considered a miracle that the boy haven’t managed to trip over his own feet or something from all of the way down from the convenience store. When Sehun attempted to protest earlier about the big bag he has to carry, Hyukjae and Donghae only replied that it was him who wanted help and it was him who’s chasing after Luhan and it was him trying to compete with over half of the university population (hopelessly). The younger of the three would like to think that his hyungs are abusing their powers as elders just to get him, the maknae, to do all of their dirty work. 

An oily; almost slimy smell invades their nasal cavity and Sehun mentally gags at the flavour hitting his taste buds from the scent in the air.

“Do people not ing clean the kitchen?” Hyukjae complains in place of Sehun. Donghae rolls his eyes and tells Hyukjae to not be melodramatic.

“Now you see why everyone prefers to eat out instead?” Donghae continues to put down his items and Sehun does the same, unloading the heavy bunch of raw ingredients onto the table. 

Pots and pans are hanging off the wall from nails embedded, and from the cleanliness and cracked paint with greasy surfaces, it’s easy to conclude that the kitchen is not in the best condition (and to think this is a relatively good university near the top twenty-five universities in South Korea).

“I can show you how to make it, but it wouldn’t be fresh when we go back on Monday. I suggest you make it again the night before school starts.”

Sehun nods frantically. “That’s alright, hyung. As long as you show me the method, I’ll be fine.”

They mixed flour, eggs, icing sugar, oil, vanilla extract (Sehun heard it’s Luhan's favourite) and some other powdery bits and liquid-like substances. The instructions were simple to follow, and once they have a smooth and pale yellow batter, Donghae showed both Hyukjae and Sehun how to spread an even layer of the batter onto cooking sheets stuck onto a tray covered in slight grease to stick the sheets down. Watching Donghae move about the kitchen knowing what he’s doing impressed Sehun.

Being so amazed by his friend’s talent, Sehun exclaims out loud: “Donghae hyung, whoever’s your partner will be so lucky!” 

Hyukjae sneers back sourly, suddenly losing interest in the spoonful of doughy conc