Jinki's POV

   Having a relationship with a person younger than you makes you feel responsible for every action you guys would take. Sometimes, you will either feel guilty or insecure with your relationship.

    And that's what I feel. Being older than my boyfriend Minho for over 2 years. I somewhat feel guilty that I'm corrupting him.

    The first time I met him was when I was crying over a broken heart. I once fell in love with my childhood friend and best friend Kim Jonghyun but he doesn't like me back. Not that he said it straight in my face, I just can feel it. Then Minho came, and started distracting me. From then on, we became close friends. Until one day, he asked me to be his tutor. He is studying in highschool while I'm in my uni. I wanted to say no but I can't. He just simply used his big round eyes on me and I'm lost. How pathetic right?

   So that's where everything starts. He confessed to me and we started going out. I haven't really moved on with Jonghyun before and Minho know it, but he insisted.

    And now, I can confidently say that I'm over that stupid dinosaur. I can now look in his eyes without feeling anything.

    I am happy with Minho, I don't have anything to complain. That's true but right now, I'm lonely. Why? Because its been a year since the last time I saw Minho.

    I once received a call from his friend asking if he is okay in america but I didn't know what to say. I didn't even know he left for America! So I just answered him with a simple: "He's okay.No need to worry."

   After that, I tries to call him but he's cannot be reach. Oh! How annoyed I was that time!

    And now, I'll just receive a message from him that he's in Incheon Airport? He wants me to pick him up? What does he think of me? Stupid?

    I didn't pick him up, instead, I spent my time in a bookstore that my friend Byunghee owns. 

    Later that night, I went home with bags full of books --I always buy a lot of books when I'm not okay or piss off--, as I arrive to my apartment, I see Minho sitting on the corner with his luggages. 

     Hmmp! I don't want to talk to him!

      "I'm sorry but, can I stay over tonight? I lost the keys to my apartment and my landlord is still on a vacation, he will be back tomorrow though." He said.

     Damn! I miss his voice. But no! He left you Jinki. He left without a word. But since I can't let him be because, technically he is still my boy friend. I left my apartment door wide open for him to enter. He did so.

      "I'm coming in." He said.

       I walk to my room to change, after that, I plop myself to the couch. I can feel Minho staring at me. I don't care, he deserve it anyway.

       "Hyung, I'm going to use your shower." He said.

      Whatever. 

       While Minho is showering, I can't help myself from thinking if our relationship is worth continuing. I mean, we have little time for each other and we don't share what's on our mind. We only show pur love through . Is that even enough?

       Sigh. What am I to do? Can I still continue this? Can I still continue while I'm feeling less confident? When I'm doubting if Minho still love me? Oh! Right, he once said that he fell for my crying face. But what's there to make me confident? Nothing right?

      Minho is young and handsome, he will find someone better. Better than me. And I don't know if I can take it. If my heart can accept it.

     After a while, I heard the bathroom door shut close, he's finally done.

    "Thanks for letting me use the shower. I'll go ahead." He said while putting his shirt on.

    Oh, he's going... Wait! He said he doesn't have anywhere to go! 

      "But you said--"

     "Don't worry, I think I can manage, I can try asking my senior if I can take his couch. You look quite busy so, I don't want to trouble you." He said. "Thanks for your help today hyung."

     No! He just got back. How come he's leaving again? Leaving me again?

    Minho is nearly out the door when I blocked it with my hands. Our position makes me inhale his manly scent.

    I want to tell him don't go. Don't leave me alone again. I don't want to loose you. But I can't. I can't open my lips. My heart is aching. All I know is I'm hurting. I'm lonely. I don't want to be left alone.

    I feel a hand touch mine, intertwinning it before pinning me on the closed cold door. Things happen so fast that all I manage to say is a short "Wha--". Before I found his lips on mine.