Kyuhyun's pov:

How annoying of Eunhyuk! If he needed to see me, he should have been the one looking for me, and eventually coming to my house to discuss whatever he wanted to talk about! Instead I was once again on my way to meet him at the agency, as his seemed quite a urgent matter...it was even a Monday morning: this meant full work...

I was having coffee at my desk, and quietly sipped it while checking that day's agenda. I was trying to get mentally prepared for some upcoming important calls, in order to set appointments with our construction partners over a building site, when my cellphone vibrated on the smooth surface of the table. I took a look at the illuminated screen: reading his name made me roll my eyes up and heavily sigh. Such a timing he had!

I rejected the first two calls, puffing to the ceiling and then bending my head again over the papers that needed my thourough check. After a couple of seconds the screen lighted up for a third time, signalling the arrival of a new text message with a faint beep.

Eunhyuk was kind of insistent then, and in the end managed to get my attention, because I moved my fingers and tapped on the touch screen to browse the inbox.

"Why aren't you picking up?! Hurry and meet me at the agency. I'm announcing a great news!"

And I almost automatically stood up from my chair and grabbed my jacket, ready to get out of my office building. I even got scolded by my secretary, who was protesting to remind me about a quite sudden meeting I had to attend in less than half an hour. What could I do if I was a rather busy person? In normal situations I would have put work above all, however I just sensed that I needed to show up at the agency that day...it was like being attracted there by an invisible magnetic force...which had a name and surname...

I sighed while walking down the main hall of the agency and announcing my name at the desk. A nice girl, who worked at the info desk, smiled upon recognizing me and let me pass through the door behind her, so I could step towards the practice rooms and staff offices.

Uneasiness took the best of me then. I was nervous and unexplicably anxious as well. I mentally counted my steps, as every single one of them could have brought me to wherever Ryeowook was working. He was there and it didn't take me long time to recognize his piano playing in the distance.

"Good!" I sarcastically snorted out with a faint grimace of disapprovement, but got immediately distracted by Eunhyuk's dancing figure from a practice room on the right. He was focused into showing a choreography he had been working on with Donghae for quite a while, and I couldn't help but glue myself to the round window on the soundproof door, completely annoyed by his carelessness. He was in the middle of his job, then why in the world he wanted me to rush with a hurry all the way there, if he couldn't even greet me as soon as I had arrived?

I shook my head and proceeded with my steps further more down the corridor, until I unconsciously arrived right in front of the music room from where I could hear Ryeowook's piano being played. Those light notes had attracted me there and sounded as sweetest as possible in the air. I felt like warming up at once, when I gazed inside the room and found Ryeowook intently playing with closed eyes, totally dragged along by the nostalgic tune. 

He really looked as if music was his only reason to live, because everything from him could tell it: from the way he sat and felt the need of accompanying the music with his every move of the head and shoulders, to that cute slight pout of his lips, while trying to refrain from the impulse to hum along the melody.

I felt an idiot because my heart was skipping several of its regular beats, and, even though my mind was desperately yelling at me not to go inside that room, I did want to move and join him so bad...Luckily I stopped on time, because I saw a stranger running in my direction and I was totally taken aback. I thought he was about to speak to me from the look of his disquiet hurry; but I didn't know him at all, how were we supposed to exchange words then? I widened eyes and stepped back from the slightly open door I had really liked to push, in order to meet Ryeowook, while this tall guy, with a too much skinny figure, according to me, stopped for a second to stare at me deeply in the eyes. I frowned and responded back, without saying a thing. I examined him from head to toe, and I thought he was doing the same, because at a certain point he lightly bowed his head, as if to greet me, or better, to aknowledge my presence there, and went inside Ryeowook's music room.

What? He really went in and dared to interrupt Ryeowook's heavenly playing! I immediately felt the urgent need to spy on them and poked with my head over the window of the now closed door. This unknown guy had reached the corner of the room where the piano was, and bent with his body over to Ryeowook. I coulnd't hear anything because of the soundproof doors and walls, but his mouth was hurriedly babbling something pretty serious: his facial features were all pulled into a very concerned frowning expression and he seemed not to flicker at all, instead he was quite decided while speaking.

I couldn't see anything of Ryeowook's reaction to what the other guy was saying though, because he sat in the opposite direction and I could only see his back. Suddenly he straightened himself and slowly closed the keyboard case. There was something wrong with the news he had just received, because that was the first time I saw him standing up and leaving the piano stool pretty worried, to the point that he had to diquietly walk back and forth around the room, biting lips out of anxiety and frowning like the other guy did. He stopped then and I saw him looking at the wall in front of him with empty eyes, that I couldn't recognize, and slowly bringing a hand to his mouth, torturing his pouting lips and nibbling at his fingertips in distress.

The guy left the piano, where he had just rested his elbows to bent forward to the previously sitting figure of Ryeowook, and walked towards him. 

I couldn't explain where all my rage could spring from at that point, because that guy had suddenly back hugged Ryeowook and was resting his chin onto Ryeowook's left shoulder, covering my sight from whatever other reaction Ryeowook could have had then. I was fuming angry as my body temperature rose and spread all over my face, leaving me breathless and quite visibly red on the cheeks. I clenched fists as I looked at how tenderly he kept on hugging Ryeowook and that this one was now softly the guy's hands, which were placed on his stomach as a result for closing his arms around Ryeowook's waist.

I gritted my teeth and I knew I was about to growl even worse than a beast, because everything I was then witnessing wasn't of any of my likings! I thought Ryeowook had come to Korea on his own, that he didn't have either friends or...

...no, that wasn't possible! Ryeowook couldn't have possibly found his new soulmate in that...that...beanpole guy! I refused to believe that! If he had truly had a boyfriend or whatever, he wouldn't have kissed me back at the party! Okay, he didn't know about me...still, he would have stayed loyal to his loved one, and tried to avoid any trap...even from an eventual true stranger...

Why then I was getting aware of my mounting and unexplicable jealousy, when I watched Ryeowook turning into that hug until he could hide his face on the guy's chest, looking scared and hurt...why? Why was I jealous?! That didn't make any sense! And I got even angrier when that guy moved his hand to reassuringly Ryeowook's hair...once, twice, thrice...stop it, already!...I wanted to scream.

Ryeowook then let him go and nodded to him, pointing with a finger to the ceiling...what was that supposed to mean? The guy patted on Ryeowook's shoulder for a last time, nodding as well, and walked away towards the door I was standing against.

I quickly turned and rested my back against the nearest wall, pretending to be waiting for someone, and my act brought me to nervously cross arms there, tapping with my shoe on the floor multiple times, just to look more convincing. I saw him glancing at me and bowing his head again. I automatically did the same, due to the fact that it was the fastest way to greet people, however I was still red on my face, and, honestly speaking, after what I had seen, I just really wanted to grab him by the collar and slam him against a wall...who was him to Ryeowook, to be able to hug him so tight that freely?

He turned left and reached the stairs, climbing them to go to the second floor. There were offices on the second floor, that meant he was part of the agency's staff? I swear I had never seen him before, though!

The impulse of wanting to check on that worried Ryeowook made me walk back to the door, and I noticed he had just sat on the piano stool again, but he wasn't playing. He sat there, bending his back forwards and holding head in his hands, distressedly running fingers through his locks and heavily sighing.

I heard him this time. The door was half open and I took the courage to walk in, I couldn't endure that sight anymore.

"Zhou Mi?" he said, with broken voice, when I lightly pressed my fingers on his shoulders wrapped in a black leather jacket. He straightened his back and turned to look behind. He turned to look at me, and of course his already sad expression got even sadder.

"So...that guy's name is Zhou Mi?" I stupidly asked, still curious about the other's unknown identity. I really couldn't come with something better, could I?

Ryeowook immediately stood up and pushed me away. I had kinda foreseen that, because I didn't move, while Ryeowook took some steps backwards, to avoid standing too close to me.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" he stuttered, but somehow put himself together again as fast as possible, because he looked as if he was really putting all his efforts into flashing me with his burning coal-like dark eyes. He frowned and pointed at the door: "Go away from here!" I did the opposite and tried to walk closer. I was getting more and more irritated by then. I quickly rolled eyes and tried to stretch a hand in his direction, as if I wanted to reassure him that I didn't want to do him anything bad...not this time...

"Do not even dare to think about touching me!" he shrieked with his high pitch and widened eyes, bracing himself to shield his figure from me. I did deserve that...I guess he was still thinking about our kiss...I would do it, if I were him...and I would hate me, if I were him...

...but I recognized my error and I truly wanted to make up for that, even though I had no reason to make up with a person I intended to forget about with all my might...what was happening to me?

"You two are here then!" 

I looked at Ryeowook and noticed that his eyes had already darted to the door behind my back; I turned as well and found Eunhyuk holding hands with a pretty happy and giggling Donghae.

Eunhyuk's famous timing...

"I thought you would have come to look straight for me, Kyu!" Eunhyuk said, a bit too surprised to find me and Ryeowook standing in the same room. I heard then Ryeowook taking a deep breath in relief.

"You were...busy!" I snorted out, annoyed. I had gave up on an important meeting for his apparently important announcement, but maybe it wasn't that urgent as he wanted me to believe. "Come on, be quick about it! I need to go back to the office..." 

"Calm down, you!" Donghae reproached me, in a scolding tone, but I saw that it didn't affect his happy mood at all. I wanted to be like him and not having to deal with a sea of unbearable thoughts all at once...I sighed then, and he took it as a sign of peace.

"Well...we discussed about it a lot, actually, and..." Eunhyuk was tightening his grip around Donghae's hand, glancing at his lover with the most affectionate of expressions. I could really feel the great love and consideration they had for each other...I wondered if for Ryeowook was the same "...you know about us wanting to tie the knot, right?"

Both of us nodded at the same time, I noticed, and Eunhyuk continued: "We are happy to announce that we will be getting married on Sunday!" Eunhyuk shouted out, showing his excitement through his gummy smile and hugging his chuckling Donghae tight in his arms.

"W-why so sudden?" I asked, pretty shaken by the surprise. I knew that they wanted to have a majestic ceremony with family, relatives, friends and all sort of acquaintances, therefore their dream-like marriage couldn't be organized in only a week and celebrated that same upcoming Sunday! They were crazy if they thought they could handle it...and besides, Eunhyuk had always said that he wanted both me and Yesung to be involved and help them with preparations...I myself hadn't been told anything about it, and I thought that Yesung knew nothing either.

"In the end we understood that we don't need a fancy ceremony. It's our love that keeps us together and we gotta celebrate that! It's useless drowning in luxury..." Donghae explained "That's why we arranged things and set up an humble party with only our families and some friends. This includes you..." he pointed at me "...and you, Ryeowook! It'd be nice to have you as well at the party this weekend!" he made a sign to Ryeowook and I saw he was totally taken aback by the sudden invitation. Donghae moved away from Eunhyuk and literally shoved an official invitation into his hands, confidently smiling.

"Saturday night there will be a dinner, hoping that no one ruins this one as well, between the five of us..." Donghae threw me a pretty dangerous stare and selected me as the possible ruiner of his precious dinners.

"I...I don't think I can..." Ryeowook suddenly spoke from his little corner of the room. He was trying to politely reject the invitation, but Donghae pulled his jacket sleeves repetitively and looked quite childish while doing so, because he pouted and acted all sweet when it didn't suit him at all. Ryeowook was difficultly holding back, until he blushed and curved his lips in a little smile: "S-sure...I'll come..." he scratched the bridge of his nose with a finger, looking extremely embarrassed. "Many congratulations for your marriage!" he added, hugging ligthly Donghae "I'm so happy that you can achieve your love dream, guys!" 

Was I being too much visionary then, or I really did find some notes of bitter reproach in his tone of voice? He was congratulating them for being able to finally marry, but in truth he wanted to blame me for finishing our relationship right at its dawn? I might have been wrong, but that's what I had seemed to understand...gosh...I really was getting kinda obsessed! 

"Is the CEO in his office?" Ryeowook asked to one of them; Donghae and Eunhyuk exchanged looks and then Eunhyuk nodded, pointing at the ceiling, or better at the upper floor. Ryeowook thanked them and excused himself while he went away. Donghae followed him shortly after and I remained in that room with Eunhyuk. I didn't even have the time to wonder why Ryeowook needed to see the CEO, because my friend approached me and put an arm around my shoulders: "So...why in the world I always find you pestering Ryeowook?" he asked.

"What?!" I looked at him quite shocked.

"I don't like the way you are whenever he is around!"

"Wouldn't you mind your business, Lee Hyukjae?!" I burst out, really irritated. Everyone seemed to love Ryeowook for no apparent reason, and everyone was trying to lecture me, out of all people, on how to deal with him...I couldn't stand it anymore. I scrolled off his arm from my shoulders and faced him: "What the heck are you trying to do for inviting him at your wedding?! You don't even know him that much!"

"Right, I need to learn from you..." Eunhyuk shrugged then, but he threw me a sideway glance nevertheless "Mind your business, Kyuhyun. You said it before, didn't you?" he laughed out loud and went away, leaving me like a fool.

---ooo---

Ryeowook's pov:

The Japanese restaurant where Eunhyuk and Donghae wanted to have dinner with me, Yesung and Kyuhyun, was a quite high-class one. It was one of those which provided private dining rooms to customers and where everyone, even waiters and attendants, wore expensive original kimonos, in order to fit with the surrounding atmosphere.

It was a Saturday evening like many others, except for the fact that it was Eunhyuk and Donghae's last evening as fiancés, before jumping into the exciting world of married couples, and my last day in Seoul before travelling back to Paris. I know my staying in Korea was supposed to be a two-month-long one, since I had to work on Jonghyun's upcoming debut, however I couldn't stay there any longer...Korea was trapping me...it wasn't nice to be said of my native country, but that was the truth...and I'm not saying that because of Kyuhyun, I actually didn't care a thing about him...

After his wrong doing, after his mischievous kiss, I had sworn that I would have definitely avoided him for good, and Zhou Mi helped me controlling my mixed feelings. It was good to have him by my side. I had been so good at avoiding thinking of Kyuhyun, that I found myself so shocked for keeping distances in such a perfect way that week. That night, though, I couldn't avoid our eyes to meet...but that was to be our very last time, so it was fine...I was perfectly fine with the idea, and I even worked a lot on how to keep my calmness and act as if nothing about him mattered to me anyway, therefore his presence at the dinner wouldn't have bothered me that much. I practiced with Zhou Mi at home, and despite knowing that Zhou Mi couldn't actually think or act like Kyuhyun would have done, I must admit that it was a pretty satisfying practice, which gave me such good results that I intended to exploit in my favor that night.

If that was to be my last night in Seoul, it was because of what Zhou Mi had told me on Monday, when he suddenly showed up at the agency. It was the same day when I received the invitation at the wedding that would have taken place on the morrow. My best friend rushed to see me to notice me about a sudden call from my French manager, who wanted me to go back home as soon as possible to undergo a delicate surgery which, with a bit of luck, might have definitely increased the chance of resolving my hearing problem. It was a surgery I had applied for since long time ago, but never managed to get done, due to the patients' waiting list being literally overflowing with requests. The medical staff, that was carefully following my case, did its very best to empty a spot for me and I couldn't possibly give up because of work. Therefore I went to talk with the agency's CEO on that very same morning and officially resigned, giving him a notice of a week, during which I still kept on composing music for Jonghyun, writing lyrics and leaving notes for when he would have recorded his songs. Leaving the poor boy alone, while he sought help from me, was heartbreaking for me as well, even because I was getting fond of his own passion for music and I had already promised that I would have promoted his work with him...but what could I do? My health came before anything else!

Knowing about how scared I was because of the upcoming surgery, Zhou Mi was even more considerate and knew how to pamper me, so that I could lift my mood. He bought plane tickets for the both of us and was preparing everything in order to quietly reach the airport at dawn. He had even been kind enough to accompany me right before the room booked by Eunhyuk at the restaurant, giving me the best of comfort before parting ways that evening.

As soon as the young girl, wearing a withe kimono decorated with cherry petals, showed us the way and opened the sliding door, I saw that everyone had already gathered there and were waiting for me. I almost immediately found Kyuhyun's gaze, while entering the room, I felt myself blushing a little bit, but didn't avert it, instead I got surprised of the little smile that curved on my lips and that was supposed to be my greeting for them all.

Zhou Mi put a hand on my shoulder and pressed a little bit, looking down on me and brightly smiling as well. His smile gave me the confidence I was lacking and that I needed to find back, in order to face the dinner. I nodded in response and thanked him for accompanying me. 

"Wait, wait! Are you Ryeowook's friend?" Donghae suddenly asked, and Zhou Mi was forced to stop on his way out. He turned and bowed with his head: "I'm sorry...I didn't even introduce myself...I just didn't want to intrude..."

Donghae shook a hand and smiled, showing him an empty place at the table: "Don't worry! Would you like to stay with us for dinner?"

I saw Zhou Mi politely smiling and I guess my eyes were shining bright at the idea of having him beside me, during that last final battle against Kyuhyun. I looked at him, wishing he would have accepted; however I knew him very well: he declined the offer with his gentleman-like attitude. He didn't feel the right to intrude in a meeting as the only stranger presence. Well, I was an intruder too, considering Zhou Mi's standard way of thought, I couldn't deny that, but I had been officially invited before and not at the last minute, like him. He shook his head.

"Come on! Really! It's fine if you stay! That way you can help us discovering more secrets and things about Ryeo..." Donghae was insisting, but he had been interrupted. Kyuhyun, who sat at the rectangular table just in front of him, stretched a hand out to him and grabbed Donghae's, pressing on the jacket sleeve, trying to calm all that excitement of his: "He said he doesn't want...stop it, now!" I could feel a slight note of irritation in his voice.

"But, Kyuhyun..." Donghae was once again determined to show off his persuasive skills.

"Oh...so, that is the famous Kyuhyun!" I heard Zhou Mi muttering in my ear. He had never seen him before, and I realized that was his first time meeting my life's so-famous-ruiner. I lightly nodded and for a moment I could tell that Kyuhyun's eyes were wandering somewhere above my shoulder, umperceptibly narrowing until they flashed Zhou Mi. My friend didn't possibly notice that, nobody seemed to notice that strange behavior...and once again I drowned in my uneasy feelings. "I'll be at home taking care of our things...you will call me later, so I can pick you up, right?" My heart hopped in surprise at the back hug Zhou Mi was giving me then, winding his right arm all around my shoulders and even pecking lightly on my left temple. It wasn't like his usual himself, but I wasn't that surprised for how he tried to support me, instead for how Kyuhyun was staring at us almost as shocked as me. I don't know why, but I bent my head and smiled covering my mouth, not wanting to think about the hypothesis of having just witnessed Kyuhyun's jealousy. No...that was too delusional...but practicing with Zhou Mi was growing its fruits...I felt incredibly light and careless towards Kyuhyun, that I even thought of being able to share some drinks with him that night. I had to behave well, since it was a great moment for Donghae and Eunhyuk after all, and ruin it with my grumpiness wasn't the best.

I let Zhou Mi go, and took a place at the empty chair between Eunhyuk and Yesung. Some of the ordered dishes had already been brought at the table.

"You two seem very close..." Eunhyuk grinned at me, elbowing on my arm over the table "...I thought it strange for you not having a crush for someone! When you first told me this, I couldn't believe it...and look at how you're blushing!"

I couldn't help but smile even wider then. I was blushing and half giggling by the time Eunhyuk finished his sentence. I took my wooden chopsticks and dipped them into the first dish I could see nearby. I kept silent, deciding not to screw up the imagination he had about me and Zhou Mi being together. I couldn't think of a worse couple than ours! I had to tell him as soon as I got home, because then Zhou Mi's laughter would be unstoppable! When I told Eunhyuk that I wasn't interested in love...it was true, because I thought I wouldn't have met Kyuhyun again anymore, and that my heart had to survive with deep scars I couldn't get rid of that easily...no other man would have had the same effect on me as Kyuhyun did...but...man, Kyuhyun was jealous! He was too damn clearly jealous of what he saw going on between me and Zhou Mi, and I must admit it was something pretty much misunderstandable...

I had worked so hard on my efforts to let him go, and I was finally ready, only after understanding that he might have had still feelings for me...I would have get my well-deserved revenge then...and I was anticipating my last night in Seoul as the sweetest of my life, if it meant getting a little revenge...

Kyuhyun didn't speak much all throughout the dinner, instead he was focused on stuffing himself of any kind of food he could pick within his reach possibility. Still full of that thought, or better, of my secret wish of wanting him jealous of me, I quietly avoided either him or his burning stare on me and enjoyed some chitchatting with the two lovers, who were diplomatically sharing some hints on their upcoming wedding ceremony. It was to be held in the countryside, on a marvelous rented park with a decorated gazebo with plants and flowers, and guests would sit on both sides of a champagne gold carpet so to create the aisle effect and...by the time they had finished talking, both Donghae and Eunhyuk had unveiled more than half of what was to be their ceremony...

As the evening was reaching its final conclusion, the rest of their words was perceived as a complete nonsense babbling to my ears...I couldn't hide the fact that I wasn't that used to alcohol and stopped right at my third glass, so not to worsen my health condition before the surgery.

If there was someone who had better to take care of his drinking habits, that was Kyuhyun.

He was resting his elbow on the table and, with a helping hand, had his head lifted and tilted on the right side. He looked quite affected by all the drunk glasses as he was staring into void with a stupid smile depicted all over his face.

"Come on, Kyu...let's go get some fresh air..." I heard Yesung say. After a minute he had grabbed Kyuhyun by both arms and helped him on the way out.

"I'm okay! I'm not drunk...not yet!" Kyuhyun was complaining and straightened himself, wriggling from Yesung's grip. When I was well aware that the two of them were away, I decided myself to finally drop my bomb-like news. I couldn't possibly know that knowing about my departure was so shocking to Eunhyuk and Donghae, not to that extent: Donghae was already discussing about pushing back the wedding, so that I could come back to Korea to attend the ceremony...but the thing that they probably didn't understand was that I didn't want to go back to Korea, not even because I was forced to do so... Sure, it was a pity not being able to attend their wedding, but why pushing it back because of me? It wasn't like we were childhood friends or someone with pretty strong ties...it didn't make sense. To calm down Donghae's overreaction, I had to use a reasonable excuse, and mine was: I had to tell him that I needed to undergo a surgery, without dispatching too many other details about my condition. 

"I need to go now..." I stood up and announced, checking the phone. Zhou Mi had just sent me a text, saying he was on his way to pick me up "It was so nice meeting you guys!" I let myself go to a round of hugs with both Eunhyuk and Donghae. I wished them all the happiness existing in this world, perfectly aware that happiness could be found nowhere, but they were a nice couple to see, so it wasn't surely up to me to shatter their dream before even trying to achieve it...

I walked alone down that huge restaurant's wooden corridors, until I got back to the main hall, where the same girl in her white kimono was neatly putting my shoes from the shelves down to the marble floor. I slipped my feet inside them and thanked her with a smile before trying to reach the door.

"Don't say such things! My friend might come back from the restroom when you expect it the less, and hear you!" 

I turned my head, attracted by that familiar voice and noticed Kyuhyun sitting at the waiting lounge with a girl. She looked extremely like the girl who was around him at the party...no, she didn't look like her...she was her! She was such a pretty girl...one of those you could well describe as the cutely porcelain doll-like: perfect white skin, fire red lips, wavy dark long and soft hair, eyes that could pierce through even the sturdiest of the rocks. She was there, sitting gracefully and maybe a bit too provocative, her folded slender legs sensually leaning against Kyuhyun's, while her upper-half body tried to embrace him. Her right arm, wound around Kyuhyun's shoulders and rested on the backrest of that red sofa, was stretching out a bit too much, and her thin fingers were moving delicately, caressing Kyuhyun's right temple. "Nobody knows about us here...I was with some friends, when I bumped into you, my boss, that's something normal!" she said.

"That's not possibly normal if we happened to have slept together once! You are my secretary!" Kyuhyun replied in a mutter, much irritated. He didn't do anything in particular to move from her though. "It wasn't once...you always run to me whenever you're this grumpy...do you need me tonight?" she was tracing his facial features with her fingers, gently lying under his chin "I can dump my friends for you and..." Kyuhyun immediately stood up, when he saw me. I stood struck. I couldn't move any limb, not even with much of my efforts. Throughout all the evening I had felt his burning eyes laying on me, but they weren't as wild, desirous and...dangerous.

I couldn't understand anything then, because he hurriedly walked towards me and grabbed me by the wrist, pulling me after him out in the night fresh balmy air.

"What do you think to do?!" His fingers around my wrist were tighter than during the kiss accident at the party. Why did he have to involve violence somehow? It was hurting very much and I kept on trailing after him, without knowing where he wanted to take me. I looked like a puppet...I was fed up with it: "Kyuhyun, let me go! You're hurting me!" I desperately called out. We walked on the pebbled path until we reached the parking lot on the backyard. I saw the yellow lights of one particular car lighting twice at intermittence, like two torches in the middle of that black and silver shining sea of metal composed by other similar luxurious and sport cars. Kyuhyun stopped in front of the passenger's seat and, not listening to any of my complaints, opened the door and pointed at it: "Get in!"

"No!" I refused, widening my eyes due to the shocking request.

"Get in, I said!" he didn't even wait for me to reply, because he pushed me in in such an indelicate way, locking the door.

"Kyuhyun, what are you doing?!" I punched the window, but Kyuhyun was already getting in from the driver's seat.

"Fasten your belt, or it might be dangerous..." I heard him saying. His safety belt clicked after being secured across his body and he started the engine.

"What?! I'm not fastening any belt! I want to get down! Immediately!"

"Then, do as you want...I won't refrain myself from speed up on the road, anyway..." he sounded strangely excited.

Kyuhyun wasn't joking. He was right when saying that he wasn't drunk...not yet...he could perfectly endure it and drive as normally as possible...even faster! His reckless drive was scaring me, therefore I just fastened the belt as I was told and looked around through the dark night, trying to get a hint on where he was driving to. The thing was that, being absent from Korea for so long, I couldn't remember anything of the various neighborhoods and had no clue on our destination.

"Kyuhyun...please, drive me back...Zhou Mi is already on his way to pick me up...what if he doesn't see me?" I hoped that my worried tone of voice could convince him, but I had to know it before: mentioning Zhou Mi only irritated him even more.

He didn't say much, but I could notice his behavior by the way his hands were strongly clenching around the edge of the wheel, harshly turning it from one side to the other, according to the road. My stomach was so upset. I didn't like the idea of being alone with him...where was he taking me to? Did I have to get scared? I didn't imagine my last night in Seoul being that dramatic! He suddenly halted its drive on time to stop at a red light, but the harsh way with which he stepped on the brake, was almost flipping the both of us from the seats. I stretched out a hand and strongly grabbed Kyuhyun's arm, pressing on it and sinking my nails on the fabric of his jacket, totally scared by the stop. I cursed him then. I felt it spontaneous to let it out, and he looked at me, with a funny expression on his face, in between anger, irritation and amusement. 

"Is this funny? Do you want to kill us?!" I asked, but actually wanted to scream, though I knew that, if I let out just the smallest of the shouts, I would have panicked...and panic meant that my ear would have started aching so bad, to the point of making me faint there. I controlled my voice and lifted my hand from his arm, blushing...but luckily it was so dark that Kyuhyun couldn't see it.

We definitely stopped in front of a pretty detached villa in a quiet residential area of the capital. I didn't recognize it, but something told me that that must have been...

"Welcome to my house!" Kyuhyun got off and run to my side, helping me out and almost immediately securing his hand around my wrist again. "Gosh, can you please stop doing that! It's hurting!" I complained and pulled my arm back, but he didn't listen "I can walk on my own!" I insisted, but couldn't do anything. He just climbed the three stone steps in front of the gate and opened it, pushing the iron bars with too much strength. After a couple of minutes we were inside. I don't know why, but I was so curious to peek more of the house in which Kyuhyun lived, just to understand a bit more of the man he had turned into; however he didn't even switch the lights on. Of course, he knew how walk around his own house, he could do that even with closed eyes, and in the end silently dragged me straight to the staircase, directed towards the second floor.

"Ouch!" I let out and grinned, when my foot bumped into the first hard step and I was about to stumble down, if not for Kyuhyun who, having already climbed a few more steps than me, was the kind of towering presence, and firmly turned to grab me "Be careful..."

"I am careful! There's a thing called 'electricity' in this world, we are really lucky to have it...so why don't you use it and turn the lights on? I reproached him, becoming even more pissed off by what was happening. I felt then Kyuhyun's arms entouring my waist and he helped me climbing the stairs, offering his arm as a support. "Where..." I tried to ask again, he cut me off "...stop it...I'm getting angry..."

"Then let me go, so you can get angry over someone who is not me...what do you think?" I shyly smiled, not realizing that we had reached his own bedroom. Kyuhyun pushed me inside once again, and I heard the door shutting closed. The room was dark and a bit cold as the rest of his house, but the moonlight filtered through the window and directly hit the huge double bed. I looked around, seeking for Kyuhyun, wanting to ask him why he had brought me there. I was about to feel my heart exploding and the sharp pain, settled and growing inside my chest, worsening as seconds ticked. I turned to my left and found Kyuhyun slowly walking towards me. I backed off, scared, and got stopped only by the presence of an empty wall behind me. If, to be granted a chance to escape, I could have pierced the wall with my body and escape through the solid material, I would have already done it, like those ghosts from horror movies...slipping away and quietly passing by. Instead I got stuck there, blocked once again by Kyuhyun's body flattening on mine.

"Wh-what..." I stuttered, blushing hard, trying to push him away with all my strength. I grimaced, not wanting any of that farce. "Stop it...please..." I pleaded with low shaky voice, when I felt his lips under my chin, tracing slowly every vein from my neckline. "I...I need to go home...Zhou Mi is probably still waiting for me..." 

I heard him grunting then, like a rough complaint to my stuttering confidenceless words. His hands were firmly grabbing my trembling body and held me against the wall, to stop me from moving further: "Stop it! Stop it!" he suddenly burst out "Zhou Mi here...Zhou Mi there...I'm sick of it! It's always him! Cut it off! I saw him on Monday at the agency...I noticed how he was touching you..."

He stopped kissing me. This time he was eagerly examining my eyes. His were still that dangerously burning...I could end up even more hurt only by gazing at him.

"What does it mean? What does it mean that you noticed how..." I began, this time triying hard to fight my fear back and react in front of him. I slipped my hands through the small empty space between our stomachs, to wriggle and push him back. He was taken aback by my act and let me flee from his grip. "...wait! Does this mean that...you were spying on me? The other day when you showed up at the agency! You were...why? Why in the world?!" I was about to cry, I didn't care if I could provoke myself a banging headache and a blackout...I just wanted to yell at him, to let out my deep frustration...to invest him with my mounting anger...I just wanted to do something for once, and not only passively suffer all his doings.

"Why? You ask me why?" Kyuhyun began to yell back at me, heavily sighing; his arms opened and stretched at his both sides as if to prove himself as innocent "Because I cannot tolerate the way he behaves with you! I won't allow you to be hugged that way by him anymore! I only met him twice, but that was enough for me to understand that..."

"Do not think you have got the right to act the jealous one!" I snorted out, waving at him an accustory index finger "Because...hey...world calls out to Kyuhyun! You have no right towards me! You are nothing to me, can't you see it?!"

Despite my anger, despite my despair, I really wished not to bear his glance at me anymore...The way he was looking at me...he seemed to be struggling with an inner fight, whose true nature I completely didn't know about. Nevertheless he interrupted me brusquely then, because he pulled me again into his hug and strongly closed his arms around my body, placing both his hands behind my head, to hold me steady against his pounding chest. His hearbeat was so annoying...Kyuhyun's heart had begun beating faster and faster, as if accompanied by a group of blasting drums...like mine...I could listen to it with my good ear flattened on his white t-shirt. His fingers ran softly through my hair, in a massagging caress that was driving me crazy. I wanted him to stop...or I would have showed me completely off-guard...I wouldn't have had any reason for fighting him back...well, I wasn't fighting against Kyuhyun or his unexplicable acts...it was more correct to say that I was fighting with all my might against my love for him, the same strong feeling I had said to have completely erased from my mind...that weakness of mine was so shamefully embarassing...

"This is how he hugged you..." he whispered, when I kept silent, totally taken aback by his sudden embrace "...I feel like not letting anyone else, except me, doing this to you..." his slender fingers through my hair were that soothing that I wanted to stay in that embrace forever, surviving only if he held me up like that...

"No...no...you, you can't!" my faint voice came out in a mumble. My lips where brushing against the cotton shirt and, as I spoke, I felt the warmth of my breath spreading on his clothes, before fading away "...you...you, idiot...you hate me, remember?" still stuttering, I lifted my arms and began punching him on his back, strongly at first, then more weakly...simply clinging onto my despair.

"Don't talk nonsense, Ryeowook..." my name sounded so heavenly, and I shivered. "It's only because I loved you very much and...still do it...that I cannot help but hate you...it was heartbreaking for me, try to put yourself in my shoes...she was my sister! Blood of my blood..." he halted for a second, before resuming speaking, shaking his head above, and still tightening his arms around me "...I don't wanna talk about the accident...I simply want to have you in my arms...can't we do that?"

That was enough. I was so confused...he was telling me that he loved me, yet hated me at the same time...that was the most absurd confession I could have ever listened to in my whole life! "Put yourself together, Kyuhyun! You don't even know what you are talking about! You're being obscured by bitter resentment now...you don't know if you want me, or the memory of my past self..." I explained, hurt by my same words. "...you...won't have me in your arms anymore...let me go...I don't want you..." What a pointless lie...

"I'm sorry, I can't do that!" his voice was strangely shaky...I noticed it, before bitterly shutting my eyes at the touch of his lips brushing against mine. He was rough either while desperately wanting to combine his lips with mine, or while his hands went to the collar of my checkered blue shirt, tearing apart the first three upper buttons, which I heard falling and reaching the ground with an almost umperceptible tic-sound. I couldn't let him do it...I could not allow Kyuhyun to have me that easily...he was eagerly trying to the rest of my shirt, his mouth all over my collarbones, teasingly biting the now visible skin, but I stopped him, blocking his hands in mine and parting them from me. I had just figured out that Kyuhyun's despair was being driven by mere lust...again, I wasn't a toy...and for sure I wouldn't have let him take me, buying me with his fake sweet words about how he was still confusedly in love with me...I hated him more than ever...

"I-I know I screwed up things...I know I had been a jerk...I am! I admit it! You won't have another admission from me as open as this one, but...please...hating you would probably be the easiest way, however I think I need your help...I need to understand what this swirling of emotions in my stomach is! It prevents me to sleep at night, to normally eat and it takes my breath away whenever I see you! Help me! I'm so confused...and you are my constant obsession! I need you back to me, can't you see how much foolishly desperate I am? You are the only key to overcome my hatred...let's go back to when we were young, and free, and we loved..."

"Don't mention love!" I burst out, freeing myself and stepping back. I was crying then. Tears rolled softly down my cheeks and I could feel one in particular, running down my chin, reaching that part of my almost bare chest, he was kissing so wildly just earlier. "You never knew a thing about love, you don't know what love is! And you never knew a thing about me...or you wouldn't have left me! You are telling me that you want me back, right? How were you exactly thinking of having me back? By bringing me here so you could have a satisfying round of on me? You have your secretary for that, as far as I know! Don't toy with me...stop joking around and face reality! I have been living in a foreign country for ten years, putting a forced scary distance between us, building walls in my head and around my heart, hoping that I would forget about you! You were all I wanted, you were the one I wanted to build something serious with...our love, our future...it was all a bad dream, though! It shattered into million pieces before even reaching the start! I can't understand you at all! Did you feel accomplished for kissing me at the party and scaring the hell out of me? Tell me, I'd like to know how much fun I caused you! Because I'd be really glad to know that you had your good laugh at me, while that very unexpected kiss was settling in me the strong conviction that I need to erase you from my memory forever! You abandoned me, and never knew what you contributed to create in me throughout the years!" 

Time for truth was slowly reaching its peak, as I rushed my words out without getting a proper pause in between. I felt the urgent need to tell him everything...and I couldn't stop. I counted on my fingers then: "I felt totally worthless of any kind of human relationship existing! I felt like a worm, blaming myself for something I hadn't even done, and thinking of deserving your hate! I shielded myself and decided not to trust people anymore, until Zhou Mi came and helped me breaking my walls down. He's the most precious friend I've got by my side, so stop acting the jealous Kyuhyun! That's extremely childish and you are not seventeen anymore! It doesn't suit you at all! I will love nobody as madly as you!"

I took a deep breath then: my face was completely red and hot by the time I had finished speaking, and that was when I got struck by the heartbreaking sight I had before my eyes: Kyuhyun standing still on his spot, bending head, some tears shone on his hidden face, enlighted by moonlight, his hand firmly clenching his t-shirt at his heart's height, fingers almost too painfully sinking in the covered flesh: "This...hurts..."

"I was hurt the most..." I let out another whisper, not wanting him to win until the very end.

"Please...trust me, Ryeo..." I cut him off, rolling my eyes. He was yet again talking uncomprehensible nonsense. "Trust? You cannot be serious, right? That's the very first thing you lacked of, back then...you can't ask me, out of all people, to trust you, because I simply don't know how to trust people...it's all thanks to you, I guess...and even if I did, I wouldn't do it for you, not even as a last wish before death!" I braced myself with my right arm, while with the left hand I tried to keep together the two sides of my torn shirt, so to cover myself. I walked some steps away then, expecting Kyuhyun to follow me. He didn't.

A whirl of crazy unstoppable emotions, I had never felt before, immediately showed up and swept away those painful thoughts that were convincing me to hate him, the only first ever love of my life. "If only..." he said. I was already standing by the door, leaving behind Kyuhyun, when this one let out a whiney "if", one of those full of resentment, fear, yet also rich in hope: the last lingering feeling human race was used to exploit when everything seemed already lost...

If only...

"Right...if only I could stop myself..." I thought then, because I suddenly halted and turned around. "I'm going to regret this for the rest of my life..." I muttered in a blow. I hurried again towards Kyuhyun and grabbed him by the collar of his t-shirt, roughly dragging him close to me as I tiptoed to look at his dark watery eyes. The fire totally extinguished. I would have lit it again, and made it burn for me only that night... I slipped a hand behind his neck and run some fingers at the base of his hair, pulling it with vigour, yet not that strongly. 

"Shut up and kiss me...now!" I ordered him with unexpected boldness. He did as he was told and we were both totally invested by a wave of strong, rough and pure feelings that drove our every move. His arms were yet again closed around my waist and pushed my body to flatten against his. I felt his loving lips eagerly moving on mine, tasting what I could offer him and asking for more. I took initiative and let my tongue slip inside his mouth, his lips as soon as I had entered with a rush, resting my tip on other further spots that tasted as sweet as him. I couldn't help but let out a small smile while Kyuhyun kissed me back, exploring my mouth with as much dedication as I was showing just earlier. I smiled at the memory of our first ever kiss. It wasn't as bold and wild as that one, but it all started from me...and that made me feel somehow...safe...

I parted from that kiss and proudly stood up to him, piercing his gaze with my own eyes: "...you owe me at least this...prove me that I'm wrong, show me the way to trust you again...let's do it together..." I stopped, taking my breath back after that wild kiss "...own me tonight, and love me like you've never done before...Kyuhyun..." I whispered in his ear.

Kyuhyun hugged me, bending knees just a little to gather strength to pull me up. I automatically sprang in that embrace and closed my legs around his waist. In a blink of an eye I found myself lying with my back on the soft bed, with Kyuhyun crawling on my trembling body...it was a moment, just the time to fully understand what was going on between us...and I softly closed my eyes, trusting him with my warm living heart that seemed to have unlocked itself from the ten-year-long frozen sleep...I closed my eyes and I felt his love...his sweetness...his soul posessing mine...

...my last night in Seoul couldn't have been more intense...