Chapter 5

 

“Kyungsooooo!”

“Oh my god, will you please get off of me?”

“Kyungsoo, I’m in big trouble.”

“Damn right you will be if you don’t let go of me right now!”

Baekhyun got off of Kyungsoo’s back with a pout. “I need support right now, I’m in big trouble!”

“Why, because you’ve gone on a date with your employer and realize you’ve got the hots for him?”

Baekhyun laughed incredulously. “I do not have the h-hots for him,” he said. He tried to keep laughing but before he knew it he was crying. He sat on the floor and hugged his knees to his chest, and sobbed loudly.

“Oh for the love of all things good,” Kyungsoo groaned. He sat down beside Baekhyun and patted his back. “Baekhyun, don’t cry.”

“This is the worst best day of my life!” Baekhyun wailed. “He’s wonderful, and sweet, and the perfect father, and god help me I really like him!”

“So tell him,” Jongdae said, popping out from who-knew-where and sitting on Baekhyun’s other side.

“I can’t!” Baekhyun cried, “Would you, would you tell the father of the kid you were babysitting that you wanted to date him?”

“It might be a little weird,” Jongdae conceded, “But if that’s what you want then go for it! What’s the worst that can happen?”

Baekhyun stopped crying long enough to stare at Jongdae in disbelief. “I’ll find out that he doesn’t feel the same way, he’ll fire me and I’ll never see him or Jamie again, or worse we’ll date for a while, burn out, break up and I’ll never see him or Jamie again!”

Jongdae winced. “Okay, so bad things could happen.”

Baekhyun tugged on his hair in frustration. “I really like Kris, and I really love Jamie, I don’t want to ruin everything by opening my big, fat mouth!”

“But maybe things will turn out well,” Kyungsoo said. “You said your date went well, right? Maybe he’s the one for you.”

Baekhyun sniffled. “I’m nothing.”

“Don’t say that!” Jongdae and Kyungsoo shouted together.

“It’s true,” Baekhyun said. “He’s a rich cosmetic surgeon with a beautiful son, and a fancy house, and friends and family who love him. I’m a babysitter who got fired from a hotel lounge and disowned.” His voice broke and he lowered his head. “I wish my mom would call me back…”

Kyungsoo and Jongdae had nothing to say. What could they say? They both had loving and supportive families, they didn’t know what it was like to be kicked out.

There was the sound of the apartment door opening and closing and Chanyeol’s voice called out, “Hey guys, what’s going on?”

“GET YOUR IN THE KITCHEN,” Kyungsoo yelled.

There was a thump as Chanyeol dropped his bag, and then he came skidding into the room, eyes wide and looking around frantically. “What’s—what’s—Baekhyun!”

Baekhyun desperately tried to wipe his eyes. “I’m okay,” he sobbed, “Really I am, or I will be, I’ll be okay.”

Chanyeol knelt in front of him and put his hands on Baekhyun’s shoulders. “You need to learn to ask for help, kiddo. Now what’s going on?”

Baekhyun hiccupped a few times, and then said slowly, “I just don’t know what to do. I really like Kris but I’m scared that if I say something, we’ll find out that we don’t work together. And I’m so young and he has his life together, what if he wants someone older? And…I wish I could go home. Kris has such a great relationship with his mom and she’s so open and loving, and I wish I could have that again. I miss my mom so much. And it was partially my fault, I didn’t try to explain things to her I just yelled, and we were both mad…and now I’ll never get to make up with her.”

All three of his friends protested at once, but Baekhyun really didn’t want to hear it. He excused himself and went to bed. He stayed awake for a while, he was still conscious when Jongdae came in and slipped into their bed, wrapping an arm around Baekhyun’s waist. He fell asleep quickly after that, and by the next day he was feeling like his old self again, and so happy about his date with Kris. Sometimes he really just needed to let himself wallow in order to be happy.

 

In the days following the date, Kris and Baekhyun continued to get closer. Baekhyun would often stay late, helping Kris put Jamie to bed, and then he and Kris would sit in the kitchen and have coffee and talk. Sometimes they talked about Jamie, sometimes Kris talked about work, and sometimes Baekhyun talked about his dream to sing. And one day, Baekhyun told Kris about his family.

“I have an older brother, and a mom. My dad died when I was little, my mom remarried. My stepdad…he’s not the most understanding person in the world.”

“What do you mean?” Kris asked.

Baekhyun wrapped his fingers around his coffee mug and stared at the table. “When I said I wanted to major in theater, he asked if I was…gay. Only he didn’t use that word. I told him no, I had a girlfriend and I loved her. I knew I liked guys, so did my mom, but we all thought that…that she was the one. Then we broke up and I started dating Chanyeol. My stepdad found out and kicked me out. My mom…she asked why I couldn’t have just been happy with a woman. I don’t think she understands but I feel like she could have, if she just talked to me. I still talk to my brother, he helped me pay for my last year of college. He says that my mom wants to talk to me but my stepdad is stopping her. He says he can’t support me anymore.”

Kris reached across the table and put his hand on Baekhyun’s arm. “Are you alright? Is there anything I can do?”

Baekhyun shook his head. “No, no. I’m okay, really.”

Kris nodded. “Okay, but if there’s ever anything you need, please let me know. I would be happy to help you out. You have no idea what you’ve done for me. You take such good care of Jamie, I’m not afraid to leave him with you and I don’t worry about him while I’m gone. And with all the pictures and videos you take of him I’m not afraid that I’m missing out on his life. I’m so grateful to you.”

Baekhyun took Kris’ hand and laced their fingers together. “To be honest, I’m a little jealous. Jamie is going to grow up feeling so loved and accepted.”

“Hey now,” Kris said, squeezing Baekhyun’s hand, “You’re loved and accepted too, right here in this house.”

Baekhyun looked up, his heart stuttering to a halt. “I—I, what?”

Kris grinned at him. “Now if I have to tell you how much Jamie loves you, then you really need to get your eyes checked. My little boy looks at you with hearts in his eyes, and he can’t stop talking about what a great babysitter you are. He told me himself that he loves you to the moon. Even if you feel like you’re alone, I’m telling you right now that Jamie will always love you. And you’ll always be welcome in my house.”

Baekhyun felt like he was going to explode from happiness. “Thank you.” He wished he could say more, but he just didn’t have to words.

Luckily Kris seemed to understand. “You’re welcome. You know if you ever want to talk about uality, that’s another thing I have experience with, and I can give you some resources for how to talk to your mom. I didn’t come out to my mom until I was entering college, even though I knew since I was in middle school.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Baekhyun said. Then he blurted, “We should go out again. Like for dinner, I mean. Last time was fun.”

“Yeah, it was.” Kris agreed. “I’d like to go out with you again, too. I’ll ask Yixing and Minseok if they can watch Jamie sometime this weekend.”

They were dancing around the elephant in the room, and finally Baekhyun took a chance and said it. “It’s a date then.”

His hands were shaking and he knew Kris could feel it.

“Yes,” Kris said, smiling like he was the happiest person alive. “It’s a date.”

 

So it was official, Kris was dating his son’s babysitter. He was torn between elated and wondering when he decided that he was fine with dating a 22 year old. But he had to concede that Baekhyun was very mature, he’d been through a lot and he wasn’t at all like Kris when he was 22. At the same time it still made Kris nervous, knowing that he was focused on his own age and was having thoughts about getting married. Baekhyun would have been nineteen when Jamie was born. Was he old enough to be a step father to a three year old? Was he ready for it?

“You’re over thinking,” Lu Han said when Kris voiced his concerns a few weeks later. “You’ve been on what, three official dates? You haven’t even kissed him.”

“I did,” Kris said indignantly.

“On the cheek,” Lu Han scoffed. “You keep going on about how you’re eleven years older than him, you’re so old and crusty, but you can’t even pluck up the courage to kiss your boyfriend. Look, if you’re so worried about it then ask Baekhyun if he wants to be Jamie’s stepfather.”

“I can’t do that!” Kris gasped, “It’s too soon!”

Lu Han gave him a serious look. “Then it’s too soon for you to be worried about it.”

“But I have to worry about it. I have to think about Jamie, and what’s best for him! And it’s not me messing around with Baekhyun only to find out that he’s not as serious about this as I am.”

Lu Han rubbed his forehead. “Oye. Okay, let me ask you this—right now, as he is, do you think Baekhyun would be a good father to Jamie?”

“Yes,” Kris said automatically.

“Why?”

“Because I trust him, and I know that he loves Jamie and supports the way I’m raising him. He’s kind but he’s not a pushover, he respects Jamie but knows not to let Jamie get away with everything. He’s…”

“He’s like you,” Lu Han said with a grin. “So what makes you think he wouldn’t love to be a part of Jamie’s life? You already know that he does. What you need to figure out is do you want him to be a part of your life? Just you, not Jamie.”

Kris thought about that for the rest of the day. It was March, Baekhyun had been watching Jamie for almost seven months, and Kris figured that the time he’d spent getting to Know Baekhyun amounted to about five. It wasn’t that much, really, but the way he saw it he and Baekhyun had made those days and moments count for something. He was just waiting for something, some kind of sign, but he didn’t know what it was.

 

On a Monday night in the middle of the month, Kris was just finishing up the dinner dishes when he got a phone call from Baekhyun.

“Hello?”

“Kris, oh my god, are you…you said I could call you if I ever needed anything, I need help.”

Kris dropped the spoon he was rinsing and struggled to keep calm, knowing Jamie was in the other room. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s my cat, something’s wrong with her, she’s making this awful noise and she’s pacing and shaking her head, I think she’s having a seizure and I need to get her to the vet, but everyone’s out and I don’t have a car, can you drive me?”

“Of course,” Kris said, still keeping his voice calm and even. “Get her ready, I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”

He hung up and called Minseok and Yixing’s home phone. Yixing answered and assured Kris that Jamie could come over for a few hours.

“Jamie,” Kris called as he hung up the phone. “Come here, my love.”

Jamie ran over and Kris asked him to put his shoes on. “I have to go help Baekhyun with his cat, she’s sick. You’re going to go stay with Minseok and Yixing, okay?”

Jamie clasped his hands in front of him. “Can I come with you? I want to help.”

“I know you do, baby,” Kris said, “But I don’t know how long we’ll be gone, and Baekhyun’s really worried right now, I don’ want him to worry about you, too.”

Jamie whimpered. “Okay, I’ll go.”

Kris picked him up and hugged him tightly. “Thank you so much Jamie. I’ll tell Baekhyun that you’re thinking of him.”

After dropping Jamie off, Kris drove as fast as he dared to Baekhyun’s apartment. He parked haphazardly and was about to call Baekhyun when the lobby door swing open and Kris saw Baekhyun dash out, a carrier in his hands. Kris flashed his headlights and Baekhyun ran over to the car and launched himself into the front seat.

“I’ll program the vet’s address into your GPS,” he wheezed, already in the process of doing so. “They know I’m coming.”

Kris put the car in drive and off they went. He could hear the sounds the poor cat was making and his heart twisted. She sounded like she was in so much pain. For a while the only sounds in the car were the cat’s hacking coughs.

“How’s Jamie?” Baekhyun asked suddenly. “What did you tell him?”

“The truth, that your cat was sick. He wanted to come along, but I told him I didn’t know how long we would be and I didn’t want you to worry about him being out past bedtime.”

“Smart move,” Baekhyun said, sounding relieved. “Thank you for driving me, I’m so sorry I took you away from Jamie.”

“It’s fine,” Kris said, reaching over to pat Baekhyun’s knee. “We’ll be there in like five minutes, do you want to call the office?”

“Yes,” Baekhyun said, fumbling for his phone. “I’ll do that.”

Once they arrived at the office a vet technician was waiting for them outside, and she helped Baekhyun get the cat carrier out of the car and took him and the cat ahead while Kris parked. It didn’t take long but when Kris went into the office, he didn’t see Baekhyun. He took a seat and waited. The office was empty apart from the receptionist and a TV on the wall.

After a few minutes a door opened and Baekhyun looked into the waiting room. “Oh,” he gasped, “Kris, you can come in, you don’t have to wait outside if you don’t want to.”

Kris got up and joined Baekhyun in the exam room. The cat was nowhere to be seen.

“They took her into the back,” Baekhyun said. He was chewing on his thumbnail. “Said they wanted a closer look.” He had tears in his eyes and Kris wished he knew how to make Baekhyun feel better.

“What’s her name?” He asked, hoping to distract Baekhyun. “I can’t believe I never asked.”

Baekhyun grinned. “Cheese. When I found her she was just a little kitten, she was hiding out under a car. It was getting cold and I knew I had to get her inside but she was so scared, and all I had on me was the cheese that I took off my sandwich at lunch. I used that to lure her out and she just gobbled it up. Cheese has been her favorite thing since then.” His voice broke. “Oh god, what if she’s really sick? What if it’s something she got when she was outside, and it’s been lurking inside her all this time?” He ran a hand through his hair. “My poor baby…this is all my fault, I just know it.”

“It’s not your fault,” Kris said immediately.

“I’m a bad cat owner,” Baekhyun moaned.

Kris put an arm around Baekhyun’s shoulders, and Baekhyun turned and buried his face in Kris’ chest. Kris rubbed his back slowly. “Look at how quickly you acted, getting her here,” Kris said. “You couldn’t have known this would happen. Nobody knows about these kinds of things, that’s the risk you take when you agree to take care of something so small and precious to you. It’s not your fault she’s sick, you did everything right.”

Baekhyun whimpered against Kris’ shoulder. “This is a parenting speech, isn’t it?”

Kris laughed and ruffled Baekhyun’s hair. “Yeah, it is. It’s fitting isn’t it?”

Baekhyun nodded and pulled back slightly to wipe his eyes. “I have a confession to make, actually,” he said quietly. “I know I could have taken a taxi here, I didn’t have to call you…but I really didn’t want to be alone, you know?” He was crying again. “I know she’s just a cat but I’ve had her for years, since I got kicked out really. I found her like a week later and she was kind of the reason I picked myself up and got back into the world. If she’s really sick I don’t know what I’ll do. I’m sorry I—”

“Don’t be.” Kris interrupted. “I get it. She’s not just a cat, she’s your baby. I know what it’s like, I had pets growing up, I know what that kind of love is like. So don’t worry, I get why you didn’t want to be alone.”

Baekhyun smiled. “Somehow I knew you would say that.” He leaned his head back against Kris’ chest and hugged him. “You’re the best boyfriend in the world.”

Kris knew Baekhyun could hear his heart pounding in his chest. “If that’s true, then you’re a really close second,” he said, impressed that he managed to say it without stuttering.

Boyfriend. Baekhyun called him his boyfriend.

They both jumped when the door suddenly swung open and the vet came into the room, holding a fluffy grey and white cat. “Good news,” She said cheerfully, “This kitty is all better.”

“She…she is?” Baekhyun asked, stepping closer hesitantly. “She’s really okay?”

“Just fine,” the vet said soothingly, handing Cheese over to Baekhyun. He held her like a parent holds a baby, lovingly and reverently.

“What was wrong with her?” He asked.

The vet patted Cheese’s head. “She had a truly nasty hairball in the back of , and it would not budge. No way she would have gotten it out on her own.”

Baekhyun looked between the vet and his cat. “A hairball,” he repeated. “A hairball.” He laughed and it morphed into a loud sob. He sunk to the floor, still cradling his cat in his arms. “You dumb cat,” Baekhyun wailed. “I thought you were dying, I thought you were having a seizure, a stupid hairball! Thank god but jeez you gave me a heart attack!”

Kris laughed and knelt on the floor next to Baekhyun, patting his back. “You okay there?”

“Give me a minute,” Baekhyun sobbed. He wiped his face on Cheese’s fur and she mewed indignantly. “Oh shut up,” Baekhyun muttered. “The least you can do is let me use you as a tissue.”

The vet gave Baekhyun a pat on the shoulder. “If it makes you feel any better, we updated her on her shots right away. You’re free to go at any time.” And she left again.

Baekhyun calmed down after a few minutes and loaded Cheese into her carrier. Kris couldn’t help but notice that he was shaking, and it worried him.

“Are you really alright?” Kris asked.

Baekhyun nodded. “I am. I’m just coming down from the adrenaline rush.” He rubbed a shaking hand over his face and sighed. “Oh god…I really got scared for a while there.”

“Need a hug?” Kris asked.

Baekhyun nodded and slumped against Kris’ chest, his eyes closed. “I just need a minute,” he mumbled.

“Take your time,” Kris said. He leaned his cheek against Baekhyun’s head and rocked him gently, side to side. “I’ve got you.”

It was so nice to have Baekhyun lean on him, to need him. This was how couples worked, they leaned on each other equally, and Kris was so glad to be there for Baekhyun, to support him emotionally. He was also very glad that Cheese was going to be alright, and Baekhyun would get to go home with a healthy cat.

When Baekhyun felt better they left the exam room, Baekhyun clinging to Cheese’s carrier, and went to the reception desk to pay. But before Baekhyun could even reach for his wallet, Kris had his credit card out.

“You don’t—” Baekhyun started, but then he stopped. “It’s pointless for me to argue, isn’t it?”

“It’s the least I can do,” Kris said. “You didn’t let me pay for dinner last week.”

“I’m paying again next week,” Baekhyun mumbled.

As they got in the car Kris asked nervously, “So…um…I’m not really sure if…are you going to be alright, by yourself?”

Baekhyun patted Kris’ knee. “I’ll be okay. My roommates will be back soon.”

“I just don’t know if I should leave you alone,” Kris said.

Baekhyun looked worried. “Did I scare you that much, when I was crying?”

“Kind of,” Kris admitted. “I just want to make sure that you’ll be okay.”

He put the car in drive and started towards Baekhyun’s apartment. After a minute Baekhyun blurted, “You can come upstairs if you want. For a few minutes anyway.”

“I think that would be a good idea,” Kris said. “Just until you’re settled.”

 

Baekhyun’s apartment was nice. He seemed embarrassed, he kept trying to hide the shoes and clothes that were tossed all over the place, and he apologized a hundred times for the state of the place, but Kris liked it. The apartment was older, but it wasn’t falling apart, and it had a good feeling.

“It feels lived in,” Kris said. “I’m still working on that with my house. This place feels like it’s got history, you know? Like…things happened here.”

“You’re strange,” Baekhyun said, shaking his head. But he had a fond look on his face as he said it.

Baekhyun made coffee, and Kris thought about helping but instead he decided to stand behind Baekhyun, with his chin on Baekhyun’s shoulder and his arms around his waist, and hang off him while he worked. Baekhyun didn’t say anything about it, but his cheeks were pink and he was smiling. They stood by the counter while they drank, side by side with their shoulders touching, and talked quietly. When the mugs were empty and washed, Kris reluctantly said that he should get moving.

“I wish I could stay longer,” he said.

“Maybe next time,” Baekhyun suggested. He hugged Kris, his head nestled against Kris’ neck.

Kris kissed Baekhyun’s forehead. Then his cheek. Then his nose. And then his lips.

If there was one thing Kris had missed most about dating, it was kissing. Just like this, slow and easy. No building up to anything, no expectations of after, just kissing someone he really, really…

Someone he loved.

Man, it felt so good to let himself think that. He unconsciously gripped Baekhyun’s hips a little tighter, and Baekhyun rose up on his toes and nipped at Kris’ lower lip. Kris let his lips part and Baekhyun swiped his tongue into Kris’ mouth. Baekhyun tasted like coffee, not at all surprising. Kris found himself smiling and he pulled back slightly to kiss Baekhyun’s nose again. Baekhyun laughed softly and tipped his head back to kiss Kris once more.

It was several more minutes before Kris came back to his senses. He and Baekhyun both leaned back, breathing heavily. Baekhyun was smiling, and Kris wanted to kiss that beautiful smile so badly.

“That was nice,” Kris said.

“It was,” Baekhyun agreed. “Just what I needed. What we both needed, really.”

Kris nodded and kissed Baekhyun again, briefly. “I’ll have you know,” Kris said, “I’m about two minutes away from calling out of work tomorrow and spending the day with you and Jamie.”

But Baekhyun shook his head. “As lovely as that sounds, you have to go to work. Some other time, maybe.”

“Yeah, definitely,” Kris said. “Maybe when the weather is nicer.”

They both heard the front door slam and they jumped apart, eyes wide.

“Crap,” Baekhyun whispered, rubbing his chest. “Gave me a heart attack.”

“Who’s here?” A voice called, “I see unfamiliar shoes.”

“Kris is here,” Baekhyun yelled.

There was a shriek and a tall boy came racing into the kitchen, a wide smile on his face. Kris knew that this was Chanyeol, and he was closely followed by someone who could have only been Kyungsoo.

“Hi,” Kris said.

“Well hello there!” Chanyeol cried, grabbing Kris’ hand and shaking it vigorously. “It’s so nice to meet you!”

“The house is a mess,” Kyungsoo said, staring at Baekhyun with wide eyes. “Why’d you bring him over without cleaning up?”

“It wasn’t planned,” Kris said quickly.

“Kris drove me and Cheese to the vet,” Baekhyun said, “I invited him up, for coffee only,” He stressed, staring at Chanyeol, “And that’s why I didn’t clean.”

“Is Cheese okay?” Chanyeol asked worriedly, dropping Kris’ hand and looking around.

“She is now,” Baekhyun said, “It was just a hairball, it was stupid.”

“It wasn’t,” Kris said, “I would have been worried too, if it was my cat.” He looked between Kyungsoo and Chanyeol. “It was nice to meet you, but I was actually about to leave. I have to go get Jamie.”

Baekhyun leapt away from the counter. “I’ll walk you out,” He said quickly.

They two of them practically raced out of the apartment, shoes hardly on. They started laughing in the stairwell, and didn’t stop until they’d gotten to the lobby.

“Wow,” Baekhyun said, wiping his eyes. “Talk about timing. Not that I would have really cared if they saw us kissing but…”

“I wouldn’t have cared either,” Kris said, “But it would have been a little…awkward, if we hadn’t met officially and that was the first time they saw my face.”

Baekhyun laughed again. “Oh man, I am going to get interrogated when I go back upstairs.”

“About what, exactly?” Kris asked.

Baekhyun hummed thoughtfully. “They definitely know we kissed…they’ll probably ask me if you’re a good kisser.”

Kris’ stomach did a backflip. “And what will you say?”

Baekhyun grinned wickedly. “That it’s too soon to tell. I would be lying, of course I know that you’re a fantastic kisser, but I’ll make my friends sweat for that information.”

Kris leaned forward and kissed Baekhyun again, wishing to god he could stay longer. “You’re not so bad yourself,” he mumbled against Baekhyun’s lips.

Baekhyun groaned quietly and pulled back. “You should get moving, before I keep you here all night. Say hi to Jamie for me.”

“I will,” Kris promised.

 

 

Jamie was sleeping when Kris picked him up, but he woke up as Kris was carrying him into the apartment.

“Hi, sleepyhead,” Kris said, kissing Jamie’s cheek.

Jamie rubbed his eyes. “Is Baekhyun’s kitty okay?” He asked.

“She’s fine,” Kris assured, rubbing Jamie’s back. “She just had a bad hairball, she’ll be just fine.”

“Good,” Jamie said, flopping back down on Kris’ chest. “Can I sleep in your bed tonight?”

Kris really didn’t like taking Jamie into his room unless he was sick or scared, but he already spoiled Jamie so much, what was one night?

“Only because you were so good for Minseok and Yixing,” Kris said. But Jamie was already sleeping again.

As Kris was tucking Jamie into bed, he whispered to his little boy, “I think I love Baekhyun almost as much as you love him.”

 

 

 

Sorry again for the wait. And FYI, I'm thinking that this is going to be 8 chapters in total.