I’m a manly man. Its what i always say. No matter what condition that happen i always showing my confidence and my cometitive side. Just if people know the truth. I just as coward as them. And sometimes its annoy me. Pretending is painful and the most tiring thing. But i am afaid if i show my weekness that person will going flying away from me.

      Sometimes i wonder who i am for you? Who i am? Did i’m important? Did you even care about me? Or i’m just kind thing that you looking for when you need something? How  many time you going to hurting me. I want stop myself from anxiously calling for you.  I am not a machine who couldn’t hurt. I  am not a doll you could play. I am not a glass you could smashed into a pieces . The stupid me was a kind of like a boomerang, no matter how cruel you throw me away i always coming back to your side. The closser i want to get to you, the more painful and tragic it is. Could it that way you keep hurting me? Because you know that i always coming back?. How if i’am not going back? How if someone holding me coming back to your side? Did you at last notice my presence? Did you going to feel empty without me? Should i try it? Should i? But i am afraid how if you realy not looking at me again. How if i realy not someting important for you. How if i become meaningless and you dont want to use me again. I’m afraid you only using me but i’m more secared if you not gonna using me anymore. 

--------------

hay hay hay ..... Today was lay oppa birthday... happy unicorn day hehe

and today was my birthday too kekekke.. i'm 18th years old now... getting older day by day.

surely October 7th is a special day \(^..^)/