Kris put his arm on Suho's shoulder, bringing him closer as they stood on the stage admiring the brightly shining ocean of silver lights. The sight was truly breathtaking and one could never possibly get tired of it.

"Yifan do you think we can do it?" Suho asked, his gaze not leaving the crowd.

The older looked down at him quizzically.

"I don't want us to be one of those groups that shine brightly but burn out just as fast. I want EXO to be big and I want it to last forever."

Kris smiled and bent down slightly to reach the younger's ear. "Can you see them, our leader-ssi? All those people came just to see us and it's only the beginning of our journey. They love us and as long as they do, we're going to exist. As long as you lead us we're capable of anything."

Suho smiled to himself and looked up at Kris challengingly. "Seems like a lot of responsibility for one person."

"It indeed does." he smirked back and intertwined their hands together as he turned his eyes back at the crowd of fans. "You're lucky you have an extremely handsome Duizhang to share it with, no?"

Suho hummed and stayed silent for a few minutes then gave the older's hand a small squeeze to turn his gaze at himself. When Kris once again looked down at him Suho stared straight into his dark eyes with a serious expression on his face.

"I need you Yifan. You know that, right?" he uttered. "I can't do it alone, so you have to be by my side. Always."

Kris smiled warmly and grabbed the shorter's man face in both hands reducing the space between them. "I'll never leave you Joonmyeon. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever."

Suho's eyes snapped open, a thin sheen of sweat covering his body. He stared at the ceiling with his eyes wide open before he let out a shaky breath and swung an arm over his forehead. 

It's been a while since I've had those dreams.

When his heart calmed down he got out of the covers and sat on the edge of the bed propping his head with both of his hands, burying fingers in his hair. It had been almost a year since Kris left EXO, almost a year since he crushed eleven distinctive hearts into pieces. It took some time and effort, but in the end they all managed to get over it and came back to their previous lives like nothing had ever happened. Suho had never tried to contact Kris, strong feelings of betrayal and hurt in his chest successfully preventing him from doing so. Thanks to extremely busy schedule he never really had time to mope around or sit and feel sorry for himself. And then, one day he just woke up and felt like he can finally be himself again, like he can finally move on. And that's what he did. He accepted the fact that Kris left and was not coming back and that's when the dreams finally stopped. Kris hadn't haunted him even once in his sleep since then.

Until today.

Suho exhaled slowly and brought a hand to his chest. He felt terribly anxious, like something really bad was going to happen but he couldn't quite put his hand on it. With a heavy heart he stood up and dragged his feet to the bathroom hoping that a shower would help him get rid of that feeling.

It was the day of the China Star Concert to which EXO had been invited among many other artists promoting in China. All the members were in the waiting room, preparing themselves and practicing for their upcoming stage. Suho was sitting on the couch staring blankly at the uproar surrounding him. His chest still felt weird and he found himself wondering whether for some reason he was just super nervous about their performance or maybe there was something seriously wrong with him.

"Your stage starts in 15 minutes guys. Did you put on your mic devices yet?"

Lay turned to the staff member. "We didn't receive our mics sir. Shall I go get them?" he offered, already standing up from his seat.

"That would be great. Than-"

"I'll go." Suho interrupted. He felt like he needed to get out of here for a moment. He needed some peace and silence. "Yixing, you stay and finish preparing yourself for the performance."

"Okay hyung." Lay sat back down and let the stylists do the last touch-ups to his hair and makeup.

"Room 4!!" the staff shouted.

Suho left the waiting room, closed the door behind him and leaned against the closest wall closing his eyes. His heart was beating faster than normal for no apparent reason, he clutched his chest tightly and slowly exhaled through his mouth. He dozed off for a minute and then suddenly remembered he had to go pick up the mics for the members, so he hurriedly pushed himself off the wall and wandered in the direction of the room with the equipment. He took a turn right and abruptly froze on his tracks as a familiar sound reached his ears. His heart stopped, he suddenly forgot how to breathe. With his eyes wide open he stared blankly at the floor too scared to lift his gaze. He heard someone talking. Straining his ears he tried to make sure he wasn't wrong, he must have been wrong.

The voice sounded just like...

"Yifan" Suho shook the older's arm lightly. "Yifan, wake up."

The bundle under the covers stirred in bed and soon a pair of dark eyes peeked outside. "Joonmyeon? What's going on? What's wrong?" he asked, his voice hoarse from sleep. Kris sat up and rubbed his tired face with his palm trying to adjust his eyes to the darkness.

"Tao's sick. I'm going to get him some medicine, his fever's pretty bad... Can you keep an eye on him until I come back?"

"Sure..." Kris muttered and got up from his bed.

"Thanks. I'll get going then." Suho smiled and turned to leave when a hand grabbed his wrist.

"Wait. What time is it?"

Suho turned his gaze at the older and looked at him quizzically. "I'm not sure, 3 AM maybe?"

Kris sighed and ran his finger's through his blonde hair. "Stay. I'll go get the medicine. It's not safe for you to wander on the streets at this hour." he opened his closet and grabbed some clothes to throw on himself.

Suho shook his head smiling. He knew there was no way he could talk Kris out of it, he tried so many times already in the past and never succeeded. Suho grabbed his hand and gave it a small squeeze. "Thank you."

Kris ruffled the shorter's man hair. "I'm going. Take good care of Tao."

"I will. Be safe"

Suho swallowed hard, he could hear his own pulse speeding up, thumping loudly in his ears.

That voice...

He squeezed his eyes shut and forced himself to lift his head. Then he slowly started to open his eyes and when the view cleared up enough for him to see his breath hitched. He felt like someone had sewn his feet to the ground, his body turned into stone. Just a few meters away from him stood Kris totally absorbed in his conversation on the phone. Suho's eyes unconsciously wandered all over his body. He didn't change much, still stunningly handsome, still radiating huge amounts of charisma. His hair was black and a lot shorter now, which in Suho's opinion only made him look more manly and mature.

"Yifan" he breathed out unwittingly. It was way too quiet for Kris to hear but somehow, right at that moment the older lifted his gaze and his eyes met with Suho's. 

The last things he saw was Kris' shocked face and how he mouthed "Joonmyeon" before Suho hurriedly turned around and fled from the scene as fast as his legs let him.

EXO's performance was successful although Suho got through it rather absent-mindedly like he was on some sort of autopilot. The members got off the stage and walked towards the changing room and Suho wanted nothing more than to just finally get to his hotel room, go to sleep and forget.Then, he could pretend that it was all a really bad dream and when he wakes up everything would be back to normal. He dragged his feet slowly following after s when someone suddenly grabbed his wrist. He felt a strong tug on his arm and seconds after he found himself leaning against a wall with a pair of dark eyes staring right at him.

"It's really you..." the man whispered and caressed Suho's cheek softly, like he was afraid it would break. "Why did you run away? Didn't you hear me calling after you?" he asked.

Suho didn't. But even if he did he would still run away.

Kris was looking at him intensely, scanning carefully every feature of his face. "Still as beautiful as ever." he uttered, his voice low.

Suho thought he must have heard him wrong. Did Kris just say he was beautiful? He really couldn't wrap his mind around what was happening, his brain felt like it turned into cotton candy.

The older looked at him now with a somewhat pained expression on his face. "Aren't you going to say anything?"

"..."

Getting nothing for response Kris exhaled slowly. "Look... Do you have some time right now? I'd like to talk to you, it's really been a long time." he looked at him pleadingly.

Suho wanted to say no, he still had that strong urge to push Kris away and storm off as fast as possible. But he found himself nodding before he could really think about it. A certain part of him missed the older terribly, craved any sort of contact with him.

"I have to change my clothes and tell my manager I won't be coming back with the rest of the group." Suho mentioned and Kris looked absolutely delighted to finally be able to hear his voice.

"Okay then. I came here by my car so how about you meet me outside, at the parking lot? I'll be waiting for you." Kris smiled at the younger and turned around to leave.

"Would you mind if we went to my apartment? I don't think it's safe to go to any public place, we'd probably get recognized in a second." Kris said as he the engine.

Suho only nodded in response. He still couldn't believe it was happening, he'd never in his dreams thought he'd meet Kris ever again, and he certainly didn't think it was possible for them to just go and hang out. When he sometimes imagined their encounter it always included raised voices, reproaches and hurt feelings. He was still surprised at himself that he actually showed up at the parking lot since running away crossed his mind multiple times on his way there.

Suho turned his gaze towards Kris and suddenly realized he stopped feeling that nauseating anxiousness from before. His heart was still beating a little too fast but he figured it was from different reasons now.

The ride to Kris' apartment took half an hour and it was almost completely silent, the only sound being the restrained melodies flowing from the speakers. When they arrived the older announced it by a muttered "We're here.", they rode the elevator to the 15th floor and Kris typed the code to open the door. Suho suddenly felt a little excited, curious about how the older's place would look like. 

They stepped inside, Kris took off his jacket and shoes and switched on the lights. The apartment was modern styled, and in Suho's opinion it didn't give off that cozy feeling he himself needed to feel comfortable. What caught his eye was a huge window wall. He went a bit closer to get a better view, which was absolutely breathtaking, he actually felt like he could step through the glass since the window was reaching the floor. Suho always enjoyed watching cities at night, the feeling was similar to the ocean of light sticks at their concerts, it was a sight that made him feel tingly, calm and excited at the same time.

"Do you want something to drink? Or maybe you're hungry? I could order something to eat." Kris offered making Suho turn his gaze at him.

"A cup of coffee would be great, thanks." the older nodded in understanding and Suho followed him to the kitchen. He leaned against a counter and watched Kris prepare their drinks.

"How's Tao doing? He had been calling me multiple times after I left..." the older asked hesitantly, his attention still on the coffee maker.

Suho's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Oh, so now you care?" He suddenly felt something snap inside his head, the anger he never had the chance to express now bubbling up in his stomach. "You knew it was him calling you and you didn't pick up? You , do you know how much he cried because of you? Do you not know how much he cared about you?"

Kris turned around and looked the younger straight into his fuming eyes pleadingly. "Joonmyeon... I'm really sorry it had to happen like this... You know how precious Tao is to me, I'd never hurt him intentionally. It was torture to see him call so many times and ignore him... but it was all for the best. The sooner he'd forgotten about me the better it was for him."

"You think that was for the best? You left without a word, not explaining to any of us why you were leaving." Suho's face grimaced, his heart clenching painfully. "Do you have any idea how it felt? Do you know how confused and hurt we were? We all trusted you, Yifan, and you betrayed us not even sparing us a look when you were leaving." Tears welled up in his eyes and Kris swallowed hard feeling terribly guilty.

"Joonmyeon..."

A sob escaped Suho's lips but he couldn't stop now, his heart was pouring out all those feelings he kept for himself for all those months. "And me? Did I really mean so little to you? You were supposed to be my partner, you were supposed to never leave me. Do you remember? You promised me, Yifan. That you will always be by my side and we'll lead EXO to the top, together. You lied to me." he pushed Kris with his hand softly. "You lied to me...

Kris took a step forward and pulled the younger into his arms hugging him tightly. Suho didn't even try to fight it, he felt like all the strength in his muscles left him.

"How long?" he continued, his voice weak. "Sometimes I wonder how long you were with us, pretending that you weren't going to break our hearts a second later. How long you played along, deceiving all of us... Was it days? Weeks? Or maybe months? Just... how cruel can you get, Yifan?" he whispered against the older's neck.

Kris pulled back and grabbed Suho's face in both hands looking straight into his eyes. He knew he'd hurt the members, it was inevitable. But seeing Suho broken like this, it made his heart feel like it was being stabbed continuously with a dagger. He wiped the younger's eyes with his thumbs and looked at him for a few seconds before leaning down and pressing their lips together.

Suho whimpered in surprise but didn't try to push away the other. "Wha-" he managed to whisper in between the kisses. 

Kris pulled back, his hands still holding the younger's face. "...You... Please don't think like this. I never wanted things to turn out this way, everything was happening so fast I completely lost control over it." he looked down at Suho, his eyes full of sadness. "Joonmyeon, you... mean a world to me. I'm sorry I hurt you so badly. If that helps you feel even a bit better you should know that I was hurting too, the thought that I wasn't going to see you for the rest of my life scared the out of me. You have no idea how happy I was when I saw you at the backstage today. I know that you run away because you didn't want to see me but... I couldn't let that chance pass... I couldn't let you go once again... I'm so sorry Joonmyeon". He let his hands slip off the younger's face and lowered his head in shame.

Suho looked at him in silence for a couple of seconds considering his options, then let his hands rest on Kris' neck and pulled him down mushing their lips together once again.

The kiss very soon became heated, infused with the desperation and unsatisfied desires. Kris' hand slipped under the younger's shirt feeling the smooth, hot skin underneath. Suho pressed himself flush against him grinding their crotches together. He let out a small moan against Kris' lips and the older growled in arousal. He let his hands wander down Suho's back, then slip inside his jeans. The younger let out a shaky breath when he felt him knead his cheeks. His heart was jumping out of his chest, the heat and Kris' intoxicating scent making him feel dizzy and lightheaded. He wondered what it all meant, he and Kris were never this. They were close, almost too close, but they never crossed the line, never went past the friendship tag. He and Kris were never this, but Suho wondered if maybe this wasn't what they were made to be from the very beginning.

Breathing heavily the older grabbed him below his and lifted him making Suho wrap his legs around his hips. Kris slammed him against a wall and started planting open mouthed kisses all over his neck, and biting in between them.

"Yifan..." Suho breathed out. Nothing was enough anymore, he needed more of everything. He was about to lose his mind any second now.

Kris placed one last small kiss on his neck, then ed Suho's jeans, ped his fly and slipped his hand inside his boxers.

"Holy -" Suho's stomach tightened at the sensation. He wrapped his arms around Kris hugging him tightly, breathing heavily into his neck.

The older shivered slightly feeling his hot breath on his skin. He pushed himself off the wall, still having the younger wrapped around his hips. "Bedroom" he uttered, his voice low and rough from lust.

Suho was sitting on the couch in the living room, his face grimaced. The members were running around, playing, arguing and he really wanted just to have a few minutes of peace. His pleadings for lowering the volume were being forgotten after 30 seconds and his head was starting to ache.

Kris glanced at him sympathetically and shook his head at the members' behavior. 

"Let's go." he grabbed the younger's hand making him look up at him quizzically.

"Let's go." Kris repeated and tugged on Suho's arm to make him stand up.

They got out of the dorm and went up on the roof. Kris took off his jacket and spread it out on the ground, then lied on it holding his hand in the air inviting Suho to join him. The younger shook his head in disbelief, smiling to himself. He rested his head on Kris' arm and took a deep breath in enjoying the silence.

"I know the kids can be too much sometimes but you shouldn't glare at them like you are about to rip their heads off." Kris grinned.

"Oh? I thought I was doing a pretty good job hiding my intentions." the younger retorted smirking.

"You were. But you can hide nothing from me. I know you too well."

Suho hummed and closed his eyes feeling his muscles relax. "I guess you do"

It was silent for a few minutes, both of them enjoying their time alone and the feeling of the soft breeze tracing their skin. Then Suho turned his gaze towards Kris.

"Can I ask you something?"

The older hummed in agreement, his eyes still closed.

"Are you bothered by the whole 'umma and appa' concept? We're not a rookie group anymore so we don't need to do that if you don't want to."

Kris thought for a second. "No. I mean, it can get pretty embarrassing sometimes, but I'm not bothered by it. In fact, I think it's pretty cute. It's fun to think about us as of a couple with 10 kids don't you think so?" he grinned and glanced shortly at the younger. "And I think that the fact that together we make a total of 100% is pretty cool, although some might find it cheesy. It makes it look like we are complete only when we are together, like we were made to be one." 

Suho didn't reply only smiling to himself satisfied at the older's answer, his heart swelling with something he couldn't quite describe.

Suho opened his eyes and looked around the room. Judging from the darkness it was about 4 AM. He turned his gaze at the man sleeping beside him. His heart was breaking at what he knew he had to do. He got up from the bed careful not to wake Kris up and wandered around the room collecting his scattered clothes. He slipped into his pants and zipped them up.

"If you want to sneak out you should know that you need to know the passcode to the door." Kris said quietly startling Suho and making him jump slightly. The younger couldn't help but notice the hurt and disappointment in his voice. He looked down, his heart clenching painfully in guilt.

"Yifan..."

"It's pretty long, do you need me to write it down for you?" Kris stood up not caring about his still body and started searching for a piece of paper. "Technically I could just go and type the code in myself but I can't do that. If it depended on me I'd never let you go." he chuckled bitterly.

Suho's eyes teared up. "Yifan..." he pleaded. "I'm going back to Korea tomorrow morning. It... Us... we aren't meant to be... it just can't work out..." he took a few steps towards Kris and caressed his cheek softly.

The older lowered his head and bit his lip, his own eyes welling up with tears. "...I know that... But I don't want to let you go... I didn't say that yesterday but I hoped you'd understand..." he looked up straight into the younger's eyes and smiled sadly. "I love you to death Kim Joonmyeon"

A sob escaped Suho's lips, his heart breaking into million pieces.

"I love you too. I love you so much." he whispered against the older's lips before sealing their lips in a kiss. "I love you Yifan." he sobbed out. "I love you."

Kris placed a small kiss on the younger's forehead, then brought him to his chest and hugged him as tight as he could trying to calm him down.

When Suho stopped crying he suddenly stiffened in Kris' arms. "Yifan..." he sniffeled "...You're ... D-do you think you can put some clothes on?"

Kris laughed wholeheartedly. "I dunno... How about you take off those jeans?"

The younger giggled blushing and let himself be picked up by Kris and then placed gently on the bed.

The day of the flight finally came. They drove to the airport in silence, their hearts feeling heavy with what was about to come. It was the last time they were seeing each other and none of them knew when they would meet again. They managed to find a quiet corner for themselves so that they could say their goodbyes without any audience.

Suho stood in front of Kris, staring at him quietly, his eyes already wet with tears. The older smiled sadly at him and pressed their lips together. "Are you going to tell the kids?" he asked, his forehead pressed against the younger's.

"No. I think that's going to be better for them, I don't want to mess in their heads."

Kris nodded slightly in understanding.

"I love you Joonmyeon. It's kind of silly I'm only telling you now when I've been feeling this way for the longest time." he smiled bitterly "I wish things turned out differently in the past..."

Suho looked up at him and his lips trembled. He felt like the longer he stood here the harder it was for him to think about leaving. He pressed their lips tightly together then pulled away, tears streaming down his rosy cheeks.

"I'm going." Suho uttered quietly biting his lip.

"Take good care of Tao"

"I will." the younger gave Kris a pained look and turned around to leave.

"Be safe." 

One day... we're going to be together. Now we're living as incomplete human beings but in the end... We are one. We were one from the very beginning.

The end... I hope you liked it, comments and feedback are very appreciated! I hope it wasn't to cheesy or something.. Anyway, thanks for reading! ^^