Chapter IV

"What's the rush?!" Dara complained as she went out of the cab. She took her small black bag and kicked the door shut.

She followed her friend as they entered a flower shop at the corner of the street. She and Jiyong had always managed to pause here to admire the renol flowers.

"Bommie?" The door banged behind her. Everyone inside looked at her with surprise... "My apologies, I didn't mean to disturb you."

"Dara, I'm fifteen minutes late!" Bom, her classmate, just replied and stared at the roses.

"First, you woke me up." Dara stood next to her scowling. "Then you hurried my breakfast and my bath... Then you dragged me out of the house... And now, we're inside a flower shop... What are we up to?... No! What are you up to?!"

"I have a nice date with Tabi. And I need your help." Bom took a rose and handed it to Dara.

"What???!!!" Mixed anger, shock and humor…

Everyone stared at Dara again...

"I... I am really sorry." Dara blushed. "So what to do you want me to do now?" she whispered.

"Shopping, my friend. But first, I need a rose." Bom took the rose from her hand and went straight to the counter.

"All this rush for just one little rose," Dara mumbled to herself.

Fifteen minutes later, they had gone to the mall. They stopped on the garments and clothing department. Bom led her towards the teen's section and they stayed there for several minutes before she took Dara for a break.

Bom settled for a burger and cola. She, however, decided to have just some French fries and an iced tea. The place was crowded inside as well as outside. The noise was not that irritating but otherwise familiar like a tune, people’s voices humming against the loud music set by the audio stands.

"This coming April, the class is going on a field trip to New York. What do you think? Should we go too?" Bom opened a conversation.

It was a futile attempt, Dara just shrugged her shoulders. Bom sighed and sipped her cola. She looked at her again, "You know we could take a ride to Manhattan after that and visit Jiyong."

Dara was suddenly awake. "What?"

"If you have... Jiyong’s address."

"Bommie?"

Bom settled her cola on the table. "Jiyong is your friend, I know that. I know how much you miss him. It's been three weeks..."

"Bom... I am not interested."

"I know how you feel," Bom said softly.

"Stop saying that! I'm tired of you people saying that you know what I feel, when you don't come any closer to understanding me at all!" Dara blurted out.

"I'm sorry, I just wanted to cheer you up."

"Thanks, but you've cheered up the wrong side of me." Dara stood up, got her bag, and left the place quickly. She felt hurt hurting Bom like that but her heart was a stone against a hammer, shattering to pieces and immediately reforming again. She clenched her fists and went her way out of the mall into a waiting cab. At least home, they say, is where the heart is…

It had been a millionth time or so that she would hear her mom saying she understands her daughter. And her friends are supposed to side with her and not to echo what her mother so faithfully declares. It felt like the whole world is ganging up against her. All because of the way they think of her and Jiyong. She isn't affected at all, people around her think she does. Does she? Was this her mask or is it really real?

Dara went out of the cab deciding to walk the last quarter-mile home to the suburbs. There were trees all around; it was more comfortable than the cab's air conditioner. She untied the black jacket on her waist and put it on as the clouds curled up the sky and the wind howled on the trees. The sun ceased to shine and the day was dimmed.

She took a faster pace as a raindrop trickled down her cheek. Seconds later, it was drizzling, and she began regretting she left the cab.

She checked her watch, eight-o-clock. As she clutched her jacket, the wind blew stronger and a strong rain began pouring mercilessly, large drops of slivery white water pouring on the highway and on the trees. She was instantly soaked up in a few minutes. Eyeing a shed a few strides ahead, she began running towards it. The shelter proved to be useless as she arrived, the wind carrying the raindrops in an almost whirlwind fashion towards the shed.

As she was wiping away cold water off her face, she noticed someone walking in the rain. But she hadn't seen anyone behind her in the last minutes that had passed.

The figure of a male in a white jacket and black jeans was a blur some fifty meters away. She looked closer. The sound of the roaring rain slowly turned seemingly to silence as she saw a familiar face. She wiped her face using her soaked hanky and looked again.

He was coming nearer, hair totally soaked by the rain, water dripping down his face and jacket. His hands were comfortable inside the side pockets of his coat. He bowed low, slowly walking.

Kim couldn't resist herself. "Ji! Ji!" she called out. Her heartbeat paced.

"Ji, it's me, Dara!" She shouted and got her wet handkerchief and flagged it up.

But as she looked again, the person had disappeared. Dara looked in desperation and leaned limply upon the shed's post. "Ji," she heard herself whispering. "Ji, come back. Don't leave me." The silence broke, the rain slamming down and thunder and lightning filled the sky. Dara closed her eyes and wished she was home... She was suddenly tired... very tired.

Raindrops falling on leaves..., a tender drizzle, the sound of the door softly closing. The cotton comfort of the bed and the silk sheets was a contrast to the cold flat concrete she had laid on some time ago… Sometime ago… when was that? Dara’s eyes fluttered open and a slight headache persisted. Her mom sat on the bed and looked at her with compassionate eyes.

"Must've been a dream," Dara whispered.

"No, it wasn't. Your father found you lying by the road."

"What time is it?" she yawned.

"It's four in the afternoon."

"That's why I'm hungry. Then how come –"

"You've slept the rest of the day. Your dad left his packed lunch for the millionth time so he headed back home and luckily spotted you lying down on one of these concrete sheds along the highway in the middle of a downpour… before anybody else could’ve thought of doing something bad on you…" Her mom took the small towel from her forehead and put it on the bowl of water. She took it downstairs.

She looked towards the window, the sunlight was slightly probing the sheer drapes of her curtain. Dara felt sad. Was it Ji? The thought occurred again. But it was impossible; Jiyong had been gone for a couple of weeks. An illusion, she thought. She really needs a better mask...

Mrs. Park came back to her daughter's bedroom. She had ignored her husband's demands to let him talk to Dara. Dara hadn't been the same for weeks and it made them worry too much. She tried to repress her anger towards her daughter’s carelessness. She could’ve been mugged there or something if it wasn’t for the strong rain. Thank God for rains…

She closed the door behind her and met her daughter's gaze. Dara looked so young and fragile. She sat beside her on the bed.

"Dara, I know it is Jiyong."

Her daughter's face reacted. Dara rolled her back towards her.

"Your father wants to know what really happened." Mrs. Park softly spoke.

"Nothing happened between me and Ji," Dara furiously replied.

"No. What happened –"

"I was tired, that's all."

"You didn't have to walk –"

"Because I wanted to." Dara’s voice dominated.

Mrs. Park stood up and faced the window. She let out a sigh.

“Jiyong had no other friend closer than you. I know the boy, Dara. When I see both of you getting along well, I feel good… relieved. A sense of security fills me. I trust him very much because I also know him.” Dara turned towards her mother, unbelieving her ears.

Mrs. Park continued, “Besides me and your father, Jiyong had been a better angel. He was watching you always. I always tell him so, to take care of you.” She faced her daughter on the bed. “No one has ever cared for you that much.”

“Why mom?” Dara asked as she pulled herself up to sit down. “Why did you – ”

“Because I know him, I trusted his mother.” Mrs. Park looked outside again. “And I know how much he cares you… as much as you do. It’s natural for teens to fall in love.” She smiled at her daughter. Dara made a face.

“I just miss him, that’s all.” Dara wanted to know if she blushed.

“But it’s time you forget him.”

“Huh?” Dara looked at her mother. “Why? But –”

“Sometimes life has to go on. People must leave some things behind to move on. They won’t go anywhere if they try to carry what’s already lost that may never be found again. Same is true for Jiyong.”

Dara felt teardrops forming. She fought the tears away. There was no reason to cry. Everything is a part of life. She prevailed… Her mom’s right. Jiyong left. He is past now.

WRITER's NOTE:

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