Chapter II

          “Now that’s funny, Eunju,” Jiyong’s mother remarked.

          “I should have never told Hyun Suk he had that key inside the car. Then he should have never made it to our date that night.”

          They all laughed. Dara’s late birthday party was striding along.

          “We should have never married that next week…” Dara’s mother winked at her husband.

          “Fate was willing, Eunju,” Mr. Kwon said biting his hamburger in half. “I’d rather not have the car than our wedding ring,” he said in a barely audible tone, his mouth already full.

          “You mentioned it was a double wedding. How come Mrs. Kwon?” Dara asked Jiyong’s mother.

          “Mom, I didn’t know that,” Ji said peering into the next picnic basket looking for more donuts.

          They were all eating on a bench in front of a table at the park in Han River. The morning sun gleamed atop the thick clouds. The trees seemed green and children were trying to climb them in vain.

          “Teddy should have been here by now. He can help me remember our story,” Mrs. Kwon said and looked at her golden watch worriedly.

          “Oh, come on Dianne, it’s a matter of 18 years, right Ji?” Mrs. Park said standing up to recover the barbecue on the grill a few feet away.

          “Eunju and I were college buddies, Dara. We swore to marry at the same time,” Mrs. Kwon started. Mrs. Park came back, with the cooked meat.

          “Smells great! I hope it tastes delicious,” Mr. Kwon said. “Go on Dianne…” Dara’s mom offered.

          “Everything’s because of this watch,” she continued taking the watch and handing it over to Dara. “It was our wedding ring. He had no money for that. Hyun Suk, if you could remember, Teddy’s mother gave it to him.”

          “Yeah, I remember.”

          Dara handed the watch for Jiyong to see.

          “We had planned our wedding secretly. But when Eunju broke the news to me that she’s getting’ married, I gave her the idea of a double wedding.” Mrs. Park smiled. “And Dara, I was so thankful of your mom and dad. Their sponsors were also our sponsors. The wedding was so beautiful, right Eunju?”

          “And I want my daughter to have the same grand wedding I’ve had,” Mrs. Park sat beside Dara and gave her a lettuce wrap. Dara just smiled while she opened to eat the wrap.

          Mrs. Kwon’s cellular phone rang signaling a call coming through.

          “Must be Teddy. Excuse me,” Mrs. Kwon said and walked away.

          “I miss Teddy,” Eunju remarked.

          “What?!” was Mrs. Kwon’s sudden reaction called everyone’s attention, her face turning ash-white.

          “What is it mom?” Jiyong rushed to his mom’s side.

          Mrs. Kwon hung up and faced her son. “Y-your d-dad met an accident,” she exclaimed while grabbing a fistful of Jiyong’s shirt.

          The breeze suddenly stopped. Clouds thickened. The greenery seemed to turn pale gray. As they looked at each other with disbelief, the world seemed to have stopped turning.

Jiyong looked at the city skyline from a lone window above the tallest hospital. He seemed alone. From his vantage point, he could see the traffic below, people coming out from everywhere rushing as if someone close to them had also met his father’s fate.

“He’s alright Ji.” The voice reached his ears but not his mind. He just stared away to the horizon.

It was only when Daea stood beside him in front of the thick glass windows did he realize her presence.

“I am sorry,” Dara said.

“There’s nothing to be sorry of,” Jiyong replied with a low voice.

They just stood there watching the panorama.

When the sun began to turn red, Jiyong sat down on the lounge. Dara followed him in silence.

“Don’t you have anything to do?” Jiyong asked coldly. She shook her head.

Her sincere response broke his determination to be left out alone.

“You won’t leave me?” he turned to her.

“Soda or juice?” She looked at him in pursuit.

“I want something else.”

“What?” Dara smiled.

“I want you to leave me alone,” was his brief reply.

“Nice tactic, Ji. But I won’t leave you. Not in a time like this.” Dara went beside him and held his hand.

Jiyong stared at her. Past memories seemed to return to him. He closed his eyes… and dreamed. He was a little boy… playing with another little child. Scenes flashed very fast like lightning… The hands… bound tight together… the hand that helped him up when he stumbled down. The hand… Dara’s hand. He wanted to hold it close to his heart… but he woke up.

“Thanks, but I’d rather be left alone.” He stood up and went away. But in his eyes remained remnants of his visions. Dara was beside him ever since. But not now, his own hand must take care of itself now…

“What’s wrong dad?”
          “Nothing… is wrong… Ji.”

His father’s weak voice was contrary to his everyday happy strong voice. He couldn’t help but stare at his dad. His father’s eyes were blinded and he couldn’t move any part of his body. Only the oxygen tube on his nose sustained him.

“I will… go, Ji.”

“Don’t say that dad. You can’t go away. You’ve got things to do… You need to live.” But in his mind were the words ‘the will to die is greater than the will to live.’

“I can’t breathe… I… am too weak.”

A moment of silence ensued as father and son seemed to reminisce their years together.

“Dad… this is funny to say.” Jiyong took his father’s hand. He can’t feel that Jiyong, he told himself. “But I love you.” He stared at the man who had been his only best friend. A faint smile drew from his face at those memories.

“I love you too… Ji. Keep faith… Nothing will stop you… if you are… determined,” his father spoke, now barely audible.

“I know dad. Please try to breathe carefully.” Jiyong leaned closer at his dad.

“Ji… tell your mother… I love her.”

“Dad–”

“Promise me…”

“Yes I will. You’re not saying goodbye aren’t you?”

“Ji. Study hard– I’m sorry… if I… can’t be there… in your graduation. Take care of yourself–and Dianne…”

A last breathe… and then ensued sheer coldness. The room seemed suddenly freezing and Jiyong put his hands on the still face now waning and pale. The alarm kicked in as the cardiac monitor flattened out. The monotone seemed too loud, deafening him.

Angels knew, he thought while tears formed in his eyes. He stared at the open windows and saw the moon hanging in the dark sky. Is the moon really golden yellow? Why is the sky black? Jiyong wanted to ponder and pretend nothing happened; life is still a mystery, unanswered even when it ebbs away. He shouted at the top of his voice and wailed again and again until strange people in white arrived and took him out of the room.

Dara just stared at Mrs. Kwon. Seemingly endless tears soaked the lady’s handkerchief. Sobs couldn’t escape Dara’s ears. Her mom tried to comfort Mrs. Kwon but to no avail. The loving wife of a faithful husband can’t just accept the fact that her love for a lifetime has gone this world, Dara thought. She couldn’t believe the news herself. She couldn’t even imagine that Jiyong was there.

“Should I say then that fate is cruel?” Jiyong spoke in a muffled tone from behind her, sitting calmly on the soft sofa.

“I can’t agree,” she replies.

“Or maybe God’s just cruel.”

“Not so agreeable,” she snapped and turned around to look at him.

“So how should I call it? Life is unfair?”

“Under heaven, everything has a purpose,” she said and sighed. How do I act out in this one?

“Death has a purpose, Dee?” The thought irritated her.

“I don’t know. I’m not supposed to know everything. Why don’t you just look for reasons yourself?” Dara stood up and walked away with a heavy heart. She had no idea how to comfort her friend.

She went near the window and stared at the black expanse of the sky. The city skyline was alive with all its lights. She tried recalling what she just said. And then conscience struck her. How could she do that to Jiyong? Besides, why should she look for a good act? This was her friend, now broken and shattered… How could she be so cold?

Dara started to return when she saw Jiyong’s place empty. He had gone somewhere. She began to look for him, on the corridors trying to outline an apology, only to find him on his father’s deathbed.

Jiyong just sat still; hands clasped together, eyes locked straight.

“I’m sorry Ji,” she simply said without hesitation.

“It’s okay. You can leave me now”

“I’m sorry about what I said earlier.”

“Everything has a purpose, you said. If you leave me now, maybe I’m gonna find that purpose.”

“You forgive me?”

“Of course.” His tone defied his honesty. How can you forgive the One who took my father’s life away? Not easily so, Jiyong adds to himself.

“So you’ll take Ji with you?”

Dara held her breath as she listened to her mother talking with Mrs. Kwon on the phone. She hid on the bookshelf pretending to be reading something.

“Okay. Right. Just around Manhattan. We would really miss you very much Dianne… He’s going to school, isn’t he? Stop!? You can’t do that to Jiyong… He decided to?.. Why Dianne?”

Dara dropped the book.

“But why? You shouldn’t let him make decisions for himself at this time.”

Dara stood up and faced his mother.

“What will you do?” Her mom looked at her. “Work. Okay. He’ll stay at her aunt… and… work? Uncle?”

Dara dropped her eyes next, and went upstairs to her room. She could still hear her mom arguing about Jiyong with his mother. They can let him decide alright, she thought. “But to stop school, that’s ridiculous,” she muttered… He will be halfway round the world. Will they ever see each other again?