Chapter 14

“Are you sure you don’t need to see a doctor?” Jaejoong asked, helping Yuri out of the car. She had barely stopped coughing during the ride home. Her cheeks were hectically bright & her eyes blinked rapidly, as if they stung.

“No, Jaejoong Oppa.” Yuri gasped in between coughs, ‘Oh Oppa, how do I tell you?’ She thought miserably, “But Yuri, look at you! You can hardly walk!” Jaejoong protested, feeling the heat from her flushed, feverish body even through her black faux leather sleeve sweater.

“Oppa.” Yuri stopped walking abruptly & looked up at him, “Promise me something. No matter what happens, never bring me to a hospital.” She said desperately.

Jaejoong looked startled & was about to protests again, when Yuri’s frightened eyes silenced him.

Yuri had never been one to plead but this was an exception, “Please? Promise me?”

Jaejoong hesitated but then slowly nodded, almost against his will, ‘Why is she so stubborn about going to the hospital?’ He wondered uneasily, but managed out loud for Yuri’s benefit, “I promise. No matter what happens, no hospital.” He said, forcing on a smile, “I just hope there won’t be any need of one.”

Yuri breathed out in relief but she caught it mid-breath. The ground felt like it was spinning under her very feet & dots began dancing in front of her eyes, “Oppa?” Yuri asked in a wavering voice, scared.

“I’m here, Yuri. It’s okay.” Jaejoong drew her closer towards him but suddenly, she felt much heavier than a normal, stable person should. He looked down & saw her limp body in his arms; eyes closed, loose hair fluttering in the breeze, framing her pale face.

“Yuri.” He shook her, hoping to pull her out of the trance. Jaejoong gathered her in his arms & his first reaction was to take her to the hospital but what Yuri said tugged at his heartstring, making him stop. Praying it was nothing more serious than a bad cold, he brought Yuri inside.

Quickly, Jaejoong rinsed out a cool piece of cloth & went over to where Yuri was lying on the bed, feverish & hot. He sat down next to her, gently wiping her flushed face, tenderly brushing the locks away from it. It pained him to see her in such a condition, “Please, Yuri? Wake up.” He took her soft hands, bringing it up to his cheeks, feeling the silkiness of her tanned skin. Yuri moaned in her sleep & lashed out at him. Gasping in pain, Jaejoong moved away from the bed, flexing his injured arm.

Suddenly, Yuri sat up, gasping, eyes flying open. Her lips were parted slightly, moist with sweat, “Oppa.” She called, looking around wildly, “I dreamed.” She clutched her head in pain.

Hurriedly, Jaejoong went to her, injury forgotten. He sat down behind her, easing her against him.

‘She’s burning up.’ Jaejoong thought, alarmed “Yuri, are you alright?”

‘Yes.’ Yuri wanted to say. She couldn’t tell him, she just couldn’t. She shook her head, trying to clear her mind, “What is it?” Jaejoong questioned gently, taking both of her hands.

Yuri closed her eyes, sorting out the thoughts in her head, ‘It’s no uses.’ She thought, ‘I can’t keep this to myself any longer.’

“Its okay, you can tell me. I will always be here for you.” Jaejoong said softly, a note of dread creeping into his voice. Tears began pouring out of Yuri’s eyes as she buried her face against him, “Oppa, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She whispered, over & over, words muffled against his chest.

Jaejoong’s throat suddenly went dry, “What are you sorry for?” He asked, desperate to understand what was bothering her. It couldn’t be anything, right?

“Oppa.” Yuri pulled back to look up at him, “I’m sick.”

“I know that but you will get better in a few days.”

Yuri shook her head & a sad smile crossed her face. Jaejoong knew right then what she was trying to say. Her eyes never left his as she finally said those few words that numbed his soul, “I’m dying, Oppa. I have aids.” Jaejoong’s world went blank. His head started to spin as if he too, was sick, ‘Yuri, my Yuri, dying?’ He couldn’t make the connection between the bright, vivacious Yuri in his mind with thoughts of death. How could a little cold suddenly turn into this evil, full-fledged, terminal illness sent from hell? Jaejoong held Yuri tightly against him, closing his eyes & wishing for the whole thing to go away.

“What? You have got to be kidding me.” Changmin laughed nervously as he slapped Jaejoong on the back, rather harder than he normally would have out of nerves, “Good one, man. You almost got me there.”

Jaejoong closed the door firmly behind Changmin & turned to look the man straight in the eye. His eyes were filled with such intense pain & anger that Changmin was stunned, rooted to the spot. He knew immediately that Jaejoong hadn’t been joking. He knew that was the truth, though no words had been spoken. He had never seen his friend in so much pain. Actually, whether he had seen anyone in that much pain was a serious question.

“Well.” Changmin tried optimistically, not quite grasping the full concept of the illness, “Maybe Yuri will get better.”

“Its aids, Changmin.” Jaejoong said, “Have you heard of anyone getting better from aids?” He would have shouted if not for Yuri who was sleeping peacefully upstairs. Yuri, his precious Yuri, was sleeping for hours on ends now.

Changmin looked down, unable to stand the look of grief in Jaejoong’s eyes.

“God, why her? Why?” Jaejoong’s shoulder shook uncontrollably.

Changmin wanted to yell too, but restrained himself as yelling at the top of his lungs would probably make matters worse.

Jaejoong was now quiet, the fire going out of his eyes. It had been like this ever since Yuri had told him eight days ago. Among the first of the onslaught of questions that popped into his head was why, “Why you of all people? Why didn’t you tell me?” Yuri had been calm, explaining to him patiently why she had kept her secret to herself, “Its not that I didn’t trust you, Oppa. I know you will never do anything to hurt me but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” Jaejoong was furious at the people who had shunned her, turning the last year of her life into misery.

“Oppa.” Yuri had said, pulling at his arm to calm him down, “Don’t be mad. If I hadn’t gotten aids, I would have never moved in with my aunt. I would have never met you.” Jaejoong felt as if someone had a tight grip around his heart as Yuri gazed him in the eye, her eyes gentle, comforting him.

Now that he thought about it, he had to admit he was being selfish. For the past eight days, Jaejoong had been moping & cursing the world for being so unfair while Yuri tried vainly to calm him down between bouts of racking coughs. He had been so wrapped up in his grief that he had neglected the only thing that really mattered to him.

“Can I...Can I visit her?” Changmin asked timidly, for fear of provoking another fit of anger from Jaejoong.

It took awhile for Jaejoong to register the fact that Changmin was talking to him, “I guess so.” He said finally, in a slightly trembling voice, “Yuri wouldn’t like it if she knew you & Victoria found out though.” Changmin nodded as Jaejoong led him upstairs to Yuri’s new room. They hovered over her bed silently. Jaejoong gazed at her in devotion. Yuri had lost weight & her pale lips were dry as the fire continued to eat at her from within but she was still the most beautiful thing that Jaejoong had ever laid eyes on, ‘She’s still the same.’ He thought, ‘Still as pure & perfect as before.’

Changmin reached out for Yuri’s hand but stopped mid-way before pulling it back slowly, “I’m sorry, man.” He said softly, careful not to wake Yuri up.

Jaejoong was silent, asking god over & over again, why he chose to do this. How could god take away the only person in the world that he truly loved? He knew he would never find an answer.

“Jaejoong?” Changmin said uncomfortably, motioning towards the door. Jaejoong nodded mutely, dropping a gentle kiss on Yuri’s forehead before following Changmin out of the room.

“You alright?” Changmin asked, after an awkward pause.

‘No! My love is dying & I’m supposed to be alright?!’ Jaejoong wanted to cry out, “Yeah, I guess so.” He ended up saying.

“Yeah, right. How can you be alright at a time like this? I’m sorry for asking this but.” Changmin said softly, seeing straight through his friend, “But how...how long does she have left?” He asked, when Jaejoong remained silent, determined to know the worst.

Jaejoong shuddered. He remembered asking Yuri this question, “I don’t know, Oppa.” She said honestly, “That’s how aids works. You feel fine until your immune system stopped fighting germs & then.” Yuri stopped, “How long?” Jaejoong had asked again, driven out of desperation.

“Three weeks?” She guessed simply.

For the hundredth time that day, Jaejoong’s world went blank. Three weeks? Only three more weeks to spend with his Yuri & then she would slip away from him? Forever.

“Three weeks?!” Changmin gasped, voice echoing with disbelief. How could this be happening to his good friend? It just wasn’t possible but it was, “Jaejoong.” He started hesitatingly, “I know how you feel right now but man, if there are only three weeks left, you should put away your pain. Cheer up for Yuri’s sake, make the rest of her life happy, you know what I mean?” Changmin forced himself to finish while Jaejoong glared at him. He thought Jaejoong was going to yell.

“You are right.” Jaejoong’s shoulders slumped down & he mumbled quietly, “For Yuri’s sake.” He repeated firmly, even though it looked like it was taking every ounce of effort to say it.

“What is it that you want me to see, Oppa?” Yuri asked playfully, as he helped her onto the balcony. It was a warm day & Yuri wore a simple khaki oval eyelet dress, reminding Jaejoong of the angel at the beach they had gone to. The dress hung around her figure, hiding how delicate & fragile it really was. She had finally stopped her heart-wrenching bouts of coughing but it seemed like she was growing weaker with each passing day.

Her coy tone caused Jaejoong to smile for the first time in days & he knew Changmin was right. There was no point dwelling on the future all the time, “Wait, you will see.” Jaejoong sat down on a large deck chair & pulled Yuri down next to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly to keep her safe & warm as Yuri snuggled against him.

Together, their eyes traveled into the tranquil sky where the fiery ball of sun was just beginning to set over the horizon. From the other side, the moon had started to rise. Jaejoong had picked this day because he knew from past experiences that it would be a full moon. The moon shone with a dull incandescence, rays of silver emitting from it to meet the golden sunlight in the middle of the water, creating perfect cadence & harmony.

Slowly, the sun continued to set & the moon rose gracefully, bathing Jaejoong & Yuri in its soft glow. The sky changed from a dusky orange to a deep, velvety blue & finally, twilight. The first stars twinkled in the sky, reflecting in Yuri’s eyes who had watched the whole magical transformation in silence.

“Wow.” She breathed quietly.

Jaejoong pulled her closer to him, “Wait, there’s more.” Suddenly, a streak of light flashed across the sky but vanishing almost as quickly as it had come, a meteor & then another & another, filling the sky with an unearthly beauty.

“They are beautiful!” Yuri cried happily, seeming healthy for the first time since she arrived at Jaejoong’s house. Some color had come back into her cheeks & her eyes sparkled with inner light & happiness.

“So are you.” Jaejoong replied, & for the first time, said so without hesitation.

Yuri’s cheeks turned crimson, the color accenting her vivacious eyes. She turned to him, “Thank you, Oppa.”

He wasn’t sure whether she was thanking him for complimenting her or for the series of displayed of nature they had just witnessed. He smiled, “I want to show you something else.” He said instead, gazing up at the stars.

Yuri’s eyes followed his until simultaneously, they landed on the same stars. They were fairly dim stars, not standing out enough to be a part of a constellation, yet they were so close together their light was interwoven as one.

“Those.” Jaejoong told her proudly, “Are our stars.”

Yuri giggled, “A Jaejoong & Yuri star?”

Slowly, Jaejoong reached into his evergreen hooded zip-front sweatshirt pocket & gasped in dismay as he felt around in his empty pocket. With something akin to panic, he d in his other pocket, only to find that it too, was unmercifully empty, “Oh lord, where did I put it?”

“Oppa?” Yuri called softly, “What are you looking for?”

“It has to be here. What did I do with it?” He murmured distractedly, under his breath, now rummaging through every available hiding space in his sweatshirt. He had brought it home, he remembered, flushed with childish pride at his creative idea to surprises his girl with…

“Ha.” Triumphantly, he stood up, pulling a startled Yuri up with him, “I remember now.” He turned to a curious Yuri, placing a finger lightly over her lips as she opened , “Come with me.”

Obediently, Yuri followed him inside, turning around for a last glance at the dark sky, hoping to see another meteor. When she finally stepped through the doorway, she found Jaejoong standing in front of her desk, holding up a scroll-like object. His eyes twinkled & an excited grin was plastered on his face.

Taking the scroll from him, Yuri settled on her bed & waited until Jaejoong joined her, “What’s this?”

“The Jaejoong & Yuri star.” He repeated her previous statement softly, his breath tickling her ear.

She carefully untied the ribbon, unrolling the small leaf of paper & gasped with delight as her eyes quickly scanned its contents, “Oh my god, Oppa, you didn’t.”

‘Dear Ms. Kwon,

Congratulations. You now posses two stars of our universe, named in honor of Kwon Yuri & Kim Jaejoong. The JY stars, near the constellation aphrodite, the goddess of love’. That was all the letter bore, with a golden seal from NASA.

Jaejoong smiled a little sadly. Two stars. Two stars to remind him of his undying love for her until the end of time.

Yuri turned to him, still smiling. Jaejoong furthered that endearing smile by placing a soft, gentle kiss on her lips. It deepened passionately as Jaejoong lowered her against the the soft, mattress.