You sighed. It’s been 2 days since you and Seunghyun talked for the last time. And your graduation is the last topic that you talked. Ugh, you hate it. Graduation is like the current question of your life, besides, you don’t know where will you continue after you finished your study at the university.

You rolled onto your back. Glancing at the sunrays that peeked through the closed curtains. You looked at the clock, it’s 8:30. Since Seunghyun has been away since 2 days, no one has disturbed your sleep, waking you up so early in the morning to make breakfast. Seunghyun has been away since 2 days, Himchan said he’s gonna be home tonight. According to Himchan, Seunghyun went to another city with his friends to works on a short movie. You didn’t ask any further because you still don’t want to remember Seunghyun and your last conversation with him. But you realized that……you kinda miss him.

You got up from your bed and walked to the kitchen. You opened the refrigerator and grabbed a box of milk. You’re too lazy to make breakfast. Well, since Seunghyun is away, you haven’t been eating properly. You decided you gonna watch TV for about an hour and then back to study for your exam. You walked to the couch and the TV, that’s when you heard Himchan’s bedroom door opened and after that you heard his steps walking down through the stairs.

Himchan was wearing his grey sweatpants along with the black hoodie. The hoodie is one size larger so he looked cute. Even though he’s your brother, you can’t lie  to yourself that sometimes he’s prettier than you. “G’mornin’!”, he said with a slurry voice.

You chuckled, “have you been drunk?”

“Uh, no, I’m just…sleepy. That’s all.”, he shrugged. “Did you make any breakfast?”

You raised your box of milk to him, “No.”

“Uh, my sister is so lazy whyyyy~~”, he whined and walked to the kitchen.

“Sorry no sorry!”, you shouted and laughed.

“It’s okay tho, I’m making breakfast today”, he said. You nodded gratefully.  Soon after, you heard him busy with the kitchen stuffs. “Uh, by the way, I haven’t told you that Yongguk is coming today right?”

“He is? In the morning?”

“Yeah, we’re going to discuss the songs for tonight’s performance. So now I’m making breakfast for three people. You, me, and him.”, he said. Ah, he’s going to perform again tonight, so it seems you’ll be alone until Seunghyun’s home which is you don’t know in what time is he going to be home.

You looked at Himchan’s cooking. Fried rice. You smiled to yourself, finally a proper meal!  “I’m going to eat in my room is that okay?”, you asked him while grinning. You both knows that your mom hates if anyone eats in their room. And so does Seunghyun. “I’m going outside to studying with friends in the afternoon I think.  So I’m going to bath now, and you can enjoy your time with Yongguk.”

“Enjoy your time with Yongguk”, you giggles. He scoffs. “Sounds so gay”

“Don’t punch me but you do look like his girlfriend”, you chuckled and run to the bathroom. Ignoring Himchan’s shouting.

*****

You left the house to go to your friend’s house to studying together. It’s all went well until you have a headache which is getting heavier during your study. You wondered, maybe you’re on a stress again. And you realized it’s  08:30 pm, your head is getting heavier and you feel tired. You sure it’s stress. Finally you bid your friends goodbye and drive home.

Fifteen minutes later, you’re still on your way to home. Thinking when will Seunghyun’s coming home. Since he didn’t contact you at all, and it’s too awkward for you to contact him. You can’t do anything. You just have to wait until he got home. Ugh, when will the awkwardness between you and your brother ends? You sighed heavily.

Your car stopped by a traffic light. You turned your head to the right and see a club. You read the name of the club….and it seems so familiar in your ears. You smiled, you finally remembered. It’s the club where Himchan and Yongguk perform today! Suddenly you get all excited and drive your car to the parking lot. Because it’s not weekend, the parking lot is not that full and you got your car parked easily. After you parked your car, you message Himchan.

“Hey! What time will you perform? I’m in front of the club!”

Without hesitation, you sent it. You wait, wait, wait, and wait for the reply. But after 10 minutes, you didn’t get any. Losing your patience, you got out from your car and stepped in to the club. After showing your ID card to the guard, you took the free welcome drink which is an alcoholic drink. Aw, too bad you didn’t bring you ciggs. Well, forget about the ciggs, you smiled to yourself, well, after 4 days of studying, you take this as the time to treat yourself. A little time to have fun won’t hurt right?

You moved further to the center, slipping in between dancing people to find a place to sit. You finally found an empty chair in front of the bartender. You sit there and nodded your head to the music’s beat. You looked at your watch, it seems like the night has just started and Himchan hasn’t performed yet. Since you can’t contact him, you decided to wait. You pulled out your phone to see if Himchan replied to your message, but it turned out that you phone was out of battery. ‘Nice’, you thought. ‘Now I am clueless and bored over here.’

After a few times (you’re not sure how long you’ve been waiting because  the alcohol made your head felt so light) you heard the MC talking about the performers that will performs on tonight’s show. You heard Bang Yongguk and Kim Himchan as the guest star. Guest star? Yeah, how’s your pretty and noisy beloved big brother could be a guest star on a show? Oh, maybe it’s because of Yongguk. Himchan has told you that Yongguk is a famous underground rapper and he has performed almost in every famous clubs in South Korea.

After a few dance and rap performances, you heard the MC called Yongguk and Himchan. You stood from your chair, left your free drink on the table and move to the middle of the crowd. For a girl, you’re kind of taller than the others. It’s not hard to look what’s on the stage even when you got stuck in the middle of the crowd.

You saw Yongguk, with a red sweater and a shades hanging on his sweater’s collar. Wow, he’s DJ-ing back there. So cool. After played the intro , he was rapping to the beat. His deep voice……reminds you of Seunghyun’s. Ah! Why are you thinking about Seunghyun? He’s not here! Stop thinking about him! You shook your head and look up to the stage again. Then from the right side of the stage, you saw someone walking in a tosca swater with a red snapback, (You recognized that snapback, of course, it’s your gift  for his 21st birthday) it’s Himchan! You raised your hand and move it to the beat of the song. You began to move your body too. Guess the alcohol is taking over your body, relieving your stress.

After three songs (or is it four? You don’t remember) they finished performing, the MC called them for a quick interview.  Your sense is finally back and you decided to go home. You somehow don’t want Himchan to know that you’re here. It’s too late for you to go home tho, past your night-time. You heard Himchan talking about girls on stage. You could only giggled to yourself and walked to the parking lot.

*****

You drove your car slowly, enjoying your totally quiet neighbourhood at the past 12 am. Your headache is somehow found its way back to your head. You considered yourself lucky because you could drive safely to here and your home is not faraway from here, only one more turn ahead on the right and you’ll be arrived. You hummed Himchan’s rap while your car is getting closer to your home. ‘One more turn.  One more turn.’, you chanted to yourself.

After your car took the left turn, you finally saw your home. You smiled a bit. After getting closer, you realized that..the lamp on the left room at the second floor was on. Seunghyun’s room. Your smile faded away. There was chill on your spine. Oh….God…you forgot that Himchan said that Seunghyun is going home