By the end of the week Baekhyun is exhausted. Each day seemed to bring in more customers than the last and he had to help out in the kitchen more than he was used to. It didn’t help that his pregnancy symptoms were in overdrive: the sweet aroma that lingered in the bakery made him nauseous, standing at the register made his back hurt, and he made way more trips to the bathroom than he would have liked. Minseok and Yixing graciously offered to take on his responsibilities in addition to theirs but Baekhyun refuses. The bakery is Kyungsoo’s baby and Baekhyun felt personally inclined to keep it up and running. It was partially due to their friendship, but more to do with Baekhyun’s guilt of being pregnant while Kyungsoo was unable to.

---

To say that Baekhyun is glad the week is over would be an understatement. It being Saturday means no alarms, no morning rush, no work, and he gets to spend all day with Chanyeol. He still has some finances to run for Kyungsoo but aside from that he is free to do whatever he pleases which at the moment is making himself into a burrito with the sheets. Chanyeol is already gone from the bed, probably working in his office Baekhyun figures, the pregnant man settles in the middle of the bed.

Mongryong, Baekhyun’s corgi, seems to want to join in on the fun too. Chanyeol doesn’t usually allow the dog to join them on the bed, but what he doesn’t know won’t kill him or it might since Chanyeol is deathly allergic to dog hair. Baekhyun concludes that he will just wash the sheets. He scoops up Mongryong and wraps him up in the sheets with himself.

“Mongryong, my baby. No matter what you will always be my baby.” The corgi lovingly Baekhyun’s face.

The two have been together since before Chanyeol. Baekhyun had gotten him as a pup for his 15^th birthday and instantly fell in love. He and Mongryong were inseparable. They went everywhere and did everything together.

Once Baekhyun thought the movies would be much more fun if Mongryong went along, so, despite Junmyeon’s chiding, Baekhyun stuffed the pup in his backpack anyway. They had almost made it through when Mongryong smelt theater food and began whimpering. Chanyeol, curly-haired and pockmarked, had been collecting tickets at the time and told them apologetically “you’re very cute but my boss would kill me if I let you through” Until this day Baekhyun isn’t sure if Chanyeol was calling him or Mongryong cute. His husband swears he was referring to Mongryong but Baekhyun likes to think otherwise.

At the time Baekhyun was aware of Chanyeol’s existence, they went to the same school after all, but he hadn’t really interacted with him. They didn’t run in the same circles. Chanyeol was a social butterfly and had friends everywhere he went whereas Baekhyun was quiet and preferred to keep to himself. He admits that Chanyeol was very charming but he never considered being friends with him. Having Junmyeon as a brother already provided Baekhyun with a shadow to be hidden by, he didn’t need another one by being friends with the most popular guy in school.

But the theater incident changed Baekyun’s view of Chanyeol for the better. Following Baekhyun and Mongryong’s ejection from the theater and the end of Chanyeol’s shift, the trio ran into each other again. Mongryong had actually spotted Chanyeol before Baekhyun and nearly knocked over the tall boy. As Baekhyun watched his pup and Chanyeol playing, he couldn’t help but be warmed by how gentle and freely Chanyeol interacted with Mongryong, not caring that he looked super dorky when he was happy. Baekhyun could only watch for so long as Chanyeol started having a coughing fit. That was the day they both learned Chanyeol was allergic to dogs and shared their first kiss.

(“It was mouth-to-mouth resuscitation!” Baekhyun insists.)

No matter, it was Mongryong that brought them together that fateful day which is the argument Baekhyun used when Chanyeol told him he had to leave Mongryong behind.

[“We can’t leave him with my parents! He’s my child. He’s the reason we met!”

“Baek, I’m allergic to dog hair as in Mongryong will be the death of me.”

“Don’t be dramatic. They have medicine for that.”

“Medicine costs money. You can visit him as much as you want.”

“Visiting him costs money too. Plus, I’m rich.”

“Correction, your parents are rich and—wait, are you really choosing Mongryong over me right now? Because it certainly feels like it.”]

It was the first argument Chanyeol lets Baekhyun win and it wouldn’t be the last.

---

Baekhyun is pulled out of his reminiscing when the doorbell rings.

“Chanyeol will get it.” He nuzzles into Mongryong fur, not the slightest curious about who is at their door on a Saturday morning. But it seems Chanyeol is not getting the door as the bell is rung again, more insistent this time.

Baekhyun heads to the door with Mongryong at his heels. He passes Chanyeol’s office and notices it vacant. A bright pink post it is stuck on the door.

Morning my sweet, boss called me in. Be back before noon.

Baekhyun doesn’t have much time to pout. Whoever is at the door has resorted to knocking.

“Jooyeon, what’s—“

“Puppy!” Jooyeon’s twins rush in before Baekhyun can finish asking Jooyeon why she looked panicked.

“Baekhyun, I’m so sorry this is so sudden. I need you to watch my kids for a bit. My husband was just in an accident. I-I-I need to get to the hospital. Um, my parents they don’t live here and—and I“ 

Baekhyun stares at his neighbor wide-eyed. He places a gentle hand on his stomach, a recently developed nervous habit. Jooyeon is still rambling, poor woman, but Baekhyun’s hearing is impaired by the influx of information. Jooyeon’s husband has been in an accident? Is he okay? She wants me to watch her kids? I can’t watch her kids. What do I do with kids? Where’s Chanyeol? I need Chanyeol.

Baekhyun’s conscience only returns when Jooyeon hands off baby Jiwon to him.

“Jiwon isn’t a fussy baby. He hardly cries, but he puts everything in his mouth so that’s really the only thing you have to watch out for. Again, I’m so sorry!” Baekhyun wants to protest but Jooyeon is near tears and alone. He is freaking out inside but he puts up a calm front for Jooyeon. Why is he so considerate of his neighbor, who is practically a stranger? You’d want people to do the same if it was you Byun Baekhyun he tells himself.

Accepting his fate for at least the next few hours, Baekhyun slowly turns around to observe the new additions to his home. To his surprise, Jooyeon’s twins are sitting quietly on the couch with Mongryong snug between them. They have even neatly arranged their shoes by the entrance. He makes eye contact with the girls who blink their little eyes back at him and then he looks at baby Jiwon, who smiles and gurgles.

“Hi, I’m Baekhyun.” Baekhyun offers awkwardly. The girls simply smile. What are their names again?

“I’m Sowon! My name means wish! And we know who you are. Mommy says you’re a nice man and that we need to be…be…” Sowon nervously wracks her brain for the word she is trying to say until the other twin intercepts.

“Behave. Mommy says we need to behave.” She reminds her sister. “I’m Soeun.”

Blue ribbon, Soeun. Red ribbon, Sowon. Baekhyun makes a mental note.

“If you want to tell us apart, just look at our hairpins.” Soeun points to her ribbon. It’s one of those trendy pins that spell out the baby’s name.

“Oh…thank you.”

“What’s the puppy’s name?” Baekhyun chuckles. Mongryong is far from being a puppy.

“Mongryong. He is actually really old. More like a grandpa.”

“Grandpa?” Sowon and Soeun look at each other and giggle.

---

Morning turns into afternoon and Baekhyun is getting more comfortable with babysitting. The girls are pleasant enough and true to Jooyeon’s words, baby Jiwon doesn’t fuss and gets along with his sisters well. Jooyeon had called Baekhyun and informed him that her husband’s accident was only minor but he did need to stay in the hospital for a while and that she would be able to pick them up in another hour or two. Baekhyun reassures her that her children are doing fine and that he is glad to watch them.

After ending his call with Jooyeon, Baekhyun figures he should make the children lunch. It isn’t until he is standing in front of the stove that he doesn’t know how to cook for kids. He usually just eats leftovers or Chanyeol cooks, but his husband is still not home.

“Hey mister. Whatcha doing?” Baekhyun is startled by one of the twins. He finds Soeun sitting at the breakfast bar.

“It’s lunch time so, I guess I’m cooking?”

“Whatcha cooking?”

“Umm…what do you want to eat?” Soeun gets a mischievous look on her face.

“I want to eat ice cream and candy.” The little girl giggles at Baekhyun’s dumbfounded face. The 27-year-old can’t believe he is being teased by someone half his size. It’s not much different from Chanyeol teasing him actually, except he is the one that his half Chanyeol’s size.

“I’m just kidding. We can eat porridge. Mommy always makes porridge because we can all eat, even Jiwon!” Baekhyun deflates. He can never get his porridge to cook right and he really isn’t look forward to being criticized by his pint-sized guests.

“Can I help you mister? Please?”

“You know how?” Soeun nods excitedly.

“Uh-huh. I help mommy all the time.” She closes her eyes as if to remember. “First, you put in the rice and then you add the water. Then, you cover it until it starts bubbling, but you have to stir it or it will get stuck to the bottom. And then you have to cook it for a long time until the rice is soft. Oh! And you can add veggies and meat too!”

Baekhyun is impressed by Soeun’s memory. But he also notices how pretty she is. The afternoon sunlight is shining at the perfect angle, making the tops of her flushed cheeks shine and her brown eyes twinkle. He hopes to have a little girl as pretty and smart as her.

“Wow, you remember all that?” Soeun nods with pride.

“I have a photographic memory. It means I can look at something and remember it, like a camera.”

With the help of the little chef, Baekhyun manages to successfully make lunch without a hitch. He settles the children around the table with baby Jiwon in his lap. In between feeding Jiwon, he glances at the clock. The time is nearing two pm and still no sign of Chanyeol. Usually, his husband never gets called into work so Baekhyun assumes it is something important.

Just then his phone chimes. He gets up to retrieve it with Jiwon in his arms but his shoulder is suddenly covered with something warm. Baekhyun figures it can only be one thing: baby throw-up. Baby Jiwon has just thrown up all over him. Thankfully it is only porridge, so, there is no weird coloring or smell but he would prefer to not be thrown up on. Before he can make a move, the girls say something that alarm him.

“Uh-oh.” Soeun and Sowon look worriedly between each other and then up at Baekhyun.

“Uh-oh? What’s wrong?”

“Jiwon threw up.” Sowon points out.

“He only throws up when he is sick.” Soeun finishes. Baekhyun’s previous panic returns.

“Sick? But your mom didn’t say anything about him being sick.”

“He wasn’t sick earlier, but mom said he should be getting sick soon. He always does when it gets cold.”

Baekhyun wants to be upset but he remembers the state Jooyeon was in this morning. Of course, she wouldn’t remember to bring it up. He exhales to collect himself and calmly goes off to clean himself and Jiwon off.

Unfortunately, being sick means Jiwon is no longer the calm, happy baby he was previously. Once he is clean, the baby starts fussing. The girls tell Baekhyun it means he wants to sleep. Baekhyun sincerely prays that all he has to do is give the baby his milk and he will be out like a light, that of course is not the case.

Jiwon puts up a fight when Baekhyun holds him and resists any soothing that Baekhyun attempts. The girls obviously feel bad and try to help Baekhyun out as much as possible but like every sick child, Jiwon just wants his mother. The baby doesn’t stop crying, ever, but does get tired of resisting and just wails in Baekhyun’s arms. Said man is near tears himself.

You’re going to be a bad parent. Why are you so bad at this? You can’t even cook. You’re so incompetent Byun Baekhyun. You shouldn’t be having a kid.

Before Baekhyun can get too lost in his thoughts he hears the click of the door. The most heavenly sound he could ever hear in his current situation. Chanyeol walks in and for a moment has to check that it is indeed his apartment. The pictures, the set up, and Mongryong curled on his dog bed indicate that it is his apartment but the children say otherwise.

“Um…Baek?” Chanyeol observes his husband busily bouncing a crying baby. The child is sweaty, red-faced, and tear streaked. Baekhyun doesn’t appear to be in better condition. Poor things Chanyeol thinks.

“Chanyeol, I need—can you—just—please take the baby!” Without questions Chanyeol drops his bag and takes Jiwon with his awkward limb because it seems Baekhyun would let go of the child whether there is anyone to accept him or not.

Baekhyun squats to the ground, sobbing into his hands. Chanyeol is still unsure of the situation but at the moment he has two crying people to take care of. He wants to comfort his husband of course but decides the baby demands his immediate attention. Mongryong senses Chanyeol’s distress and jumps up from his bed to comfort Baekhyun. Chanyeol gives the dog a thankful rub on the head.

“Hey, buddy. What’s wrong, hm? You’re burning up, must be that cold that’s floating around.” He turns to the girls, who have been looking on helplessly. He assumes they have some relation to the crying child in his arms.

“Hello, I’m Chanyeol. Is this your brother?” They nod in unison. “Can you tell me your names?” Sowon seemingly forgets the tense situation and beams.

“My name is Sowon! It means wish!” Soeun shushes her twin sister.

“I’m Soeun.” Chanyeol offers a friendly smile.

“Okay, girls, I need your help. Can you help me?” They nod.

Chanyeol manages to get Jiwon to stop crying but still has to break his fever. He decides to give the baby a warm bath like his mother did whenever he got a fever. While the tub is filling up, Chanyeol makes a makeshift bed for Jiwon in the middle of the living area and asks the twins to watch him.

Mongryong then rushes in and nips at Chanyeol’s feet.

“Aish, Mongryong, stop that.” Mongryong obeys but starts tugging at Chanyeol’s pants. The tall man then remembers his husband, who was crying when he saw him last. Chanyeol shuts off the water and searches for Baekhyun, but not before he checks on the kids.

---

From his cotton cocoon, Baekhyun can hear everything that is going on outside the bedroom. He can hear Chanyeol’s deep voice vibrating through the walls. He notices that no matter how loud Jiwon cries, Chanyeol remains calm and gentle and his words remain sweet and understanding.

“I know, buddy. I know you’re uncomfortable. Your mama will be back in no time.”

Baekhyun smiles despite the tears that continue falling down his face. He has always known Chanyeol would be a good dad. He just wishes he could say the same about himself. The pregnant man continues listening to the commotion until his eyes become heavy. His tears, though, never stop.

When he awakes again, it is to the sound of the bedroom door opening. He hears the clinking of Mongryong’s dog tags and Chanyeol’s undeniable lead feet. Not in the mood to lay bare his insecurities, Baekhyun feigns sleep.

The bed dips when Chanyeol sits beside his sleeping husband. He knows Baekhyun isn’t really asleep but his husband was so distressed earlier that he decides to let it go. Chanyeol brushes Baekhyun’s hair away from his face. Even after all these years, Baekhyun is still so stunning. He hasn’t aged a day, but Chanyeol isn’t pleased with the frown that takes over his husband’s face.

“What’s got you so down, pup?” With a heavy heart Chanyeol places kiss on Baekhyun’s forehead before he leaves to attend to Jiwon again. “Whatever it is, I got you…always.”

---

Jiwon’s fever goes down after the bath and he calm enough that Chanyeol manages to make dinner for them all. With Jiwon strapped to his front and Soeun and Sowon assisting in cooking, Chanyeol finds himself having a good time despite the earlier chaos.

“You’re married to Mr. Baekhyun?” Chanyeol nods with a smile.

“Yup.” Sowon’s eyes light up with excitement.

“That’s awesome! Mom says being married is like when we play house. I can’t wait to get married so I can play house every day!” Chanyeol chuckles.

The girls continue asking Chanyeol their endless questions between bites and Chanyeol gladly answers. Jiwon seems to be happier too as he excitedly engages in the conversation even if all he can do is laugh, babble, and drool.

They are all so lost in conversation that they fail to notice Baekhyun’s presence until Jiwon shrieks.

“Da!” Chanyeol and Baekhyun briefly make eye contact but the smaller can’t hold contact for long, embarrassed by his earlier breakdown. Oblivious to the mood of the situation, Jiwon shrieks again.

“Da!” This time he makes grabby hands at Baekhyun.

“Jiwon-ie, that’s not appa. That’s Mr. Baekhyun.” Soeun corrects.

“He likes you Mr. Baekhyun.” Sowon informs Baekhyun, who only offers a partial smile. He can feel Chanyeol watching him and directs the same smile at him to assure his husband that he’s okay. Meanwhile, Jiwon continues to struggle against Chanyeol’s hold to reach out to Baekhyun. However, he doesn’t have much time to respond when the doorbell rings.

Jooyeon is alone again but more relaxed than this morning.

“Baekhyun, thank you so much!” She pulls Baekhyun into a hug. “I’m so sorry it took so long. My husband ended up needing some minor surgery so I had to stay a while longer. I hope the kids weren’t too much too handle.”

“Your kids are lovely.” Chanyeol presses himself against Baekhyun’s back. “Hi, I’m Chanyeol.”

Baekhyun can tell that Chanyeol is using his special, people charming smile because Jooyeon is blushing. He isn’t jealous. Chanyeol can’t help it that he has an innate ability to make people fall for him. But it is another stinging reminder of the incompetence Baekhyun feels when compared to his husband.

While Chanyeol helps see Jooyeon and the kids off, Baekhyun decides to clean up the dinner table. Mongryong follows his owner around, rubbing up against his leg as if to comfort Baekhyun. The pregnant man smiles at his dog’s antics.

He almost forgets about Chanyeol until the taller man wraps him up from behind.

“Hi.” Baekhyun doesn’t respond verbally but allows himself to melt into Chanyeol’s hold. It isn’t until now that Baekhyun realizes that he and his husband haven’t had contact all day. I miss you.

“I miss you.” Chanyeol laughs and his breath against Baekhyun’s collarbone sends a shiver through the smaller man’s body.

“I’m right here.”

“I know, but I just miss you.” Chanyeol turns Baekhyun around, pulling him closer. From his position against his husband’s chest, Baekhyun can hear Chanyeol’s heartbeat and it beats in time with his own. It makes Baekhyun wonder how even with their numerous similarities they could be so different. Like Chanyeol will be a good dad and he won’t.

“You’re going to be a great dad.”

“So are you, hon.” Baekhyun sighs. He pushes Chanyeol away gently and returns to doing the dishes.

“No, I won’t.” Frustrated that his husband has so little faith in himself, Chanyeol takes Baekhyun’s hands so he can’t continue with the dishes.

“You will be a great dad, too. Why would you think otherwise?”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Well, make me understand.” Baekhyun turns his eyes towards the floor. He hates showing his vulnerable side to his husband. It’s cynical but sometimes Baekhyun feels like Chanyeol settled for him. They have only ever been with each other. What if Chanyeol wakes up one day and realizes he could do better? Chanyeol is his life. He can’t risk losing him so Baekhyun keeps his insecurities to himself.

“You won’t understand.”

“Well, I can’t if you don’t tell me.”

“How can you?! You’re perfect, Chan. Handsome, talented, great with kids. How could you possibly understand the insecurities of someone like me? How?” Chanyeol is surprised by Baekhyun’s outburst but more hurt that he didn’t notice his husband’s feelings. Baekhyun never said anything so he just assumed everything was fine and he was so excited to be pregnant.

“Babe, I—“

“You can’t. You can’t understand, Chanyeol. And I can’t tell you because I can’t help but feel like I will be judged. I don’t want my feelings belittled and I don’t need you or anyone else to tell me that I’m crazy because I know I am. I know my feelings are irrational and unrealistic, but I can’t help feeling them.” Baekhyun is panting by the time he finishes speaking. He expects Chanyeol to respond right away but his husband just gets a faraway look in his eyes. The taller man remains quiet for a moment but he does speak, it breaks Baekhyun’s heart.

“Is that how little you think of me?” Great. Look at what you did Byun Baekhyun. Why do you always mess everything up?

“I am your husband Byun Baekhyun. Maybe I wouldn’t understand but I would never judge you. I would never belittle you. But if that is how I have made you feel then, obviously, I have failed.” Baekhyun doesn’t stop the tears that fall.

“Chanyeol, I’m so sorry. You’re perfect. I know you wouldn’t do those things. I just—“ Seeing his husband cry makes Chanyeol forget about the hurt he had just been feeling.

“No, no Baek don’t cry. I don’t want you to feel bad. I just want you to know you can lean on me. That’s what I’m here for. I am your husband, yours. I will love you until the end of time.” Baekhyun nods in understanding, holding onto Chanyeol tightly as if he would escape. The taller man makes his pregnant husband look at him.

“Feel like telling me what’s wrong, then?” Baekhyun shakes his head.

“Some other time. Right now, I just need you.”

---

So, I went a little crazy. I'm sorry my writing is so inconsistent haha and I'm sorry it's been a while since my last update. I have been so caught up with school that writing has become the last thing on my mind but I promise I will work on the story when I can. This chapter contains a lot of information on BaekYeol's past so I hope you guys enjoy that and it also gives some insight into Baekhyun's inner feelings. Feel free to comment. Let me know what you think, feel, predict, or just to say hi :)