Seyoung POV

My day is . It really . Why am I like this? Being so timid and scared of other perception towards me.

I'm holding tight my bag and I wait restlessly at the bus stop, stomping my feet and check on my watch every 5 minutes. It's already 7.30 am. I walked to the side of the street and look on my left to see if the bus arrive yet. I'm becoming more anxious but everybody that was waiting for the bus behind me seem to be more relax and scrolling down their phone or maybe gossiping about the celebrity. Suddenly the pain from my stomach come again. I bit my lips to endure the pain and my right hand massage the painful area. Just then when I was busy being sick, the bus arrive and the other passeger that was relax just now, rush off and make a line to aboard the bus. I barely walk to join them and when it was my turn, the bus already packed with human. My leg freeze and my body tremble from fear.

"Agasshi? Are you going to aboard or not?" the driver asked me who look dumbfounded. I took a few step back and shook my head. The door closed right in front of me and it make it way to the assign destination. Unconciously, my tears stream down my cheek and quickly I wiped it with the back of my palm.

"Park Seyoung, you such a loser. Why are you being like this? What are you afraid off?" I asked my inner self. It such an easy task and I couldn't do it. I end up taking a cab to my workplace. I want to save up some money to go on holiday, but I end up wasting it on the cab fare which far more expensive than riding the bus.

This is me Park Seyoung. A girl that don't have any courage to shout out what I feel. A girl that have no confident and will tremble when she was in a crowd of people. A girl that should be call a loser.Plain. Low self esteem. Vulnerable

"Seyoung could you bring this to Manager Kim?" my collague in his 30 hand me a document to pass it to our department manager, Mr. Kim. He just could pass it by himself though.

"Why don't you.."before I could finish my word, he already hiss at me and start shouting to my face.

"Park Seyoung! You're his secretary right? Isn't it your job to hand this over to our manager? My hand already full of work, and what can I see you got so many free time!"

Is he crazy?! He said I got no work to do?! Put yourself in my shoes old geezer! Faking a smile when you were being shout because of someone mistake. Hold on your self and endure when our erted manager flirting with you. Answer all of the call that come in non-stop.

He throw the file on my table and I just look at him walk away from my place. Slowly, I took the file and went to Mr. Kim room. I knocked his door and went in when he asked me too. I took a deep breath and walk to his table. As I walk to him, I could feel that his eyes were staring my body, from the head to the toes, with his erted face that I want to punch so badly. It make me really uncomfortable. Beside he already had a wife and two kids.

"Mr. Kim, this the file from Mr. Hwang." slowly I put it on his table and to my shock, he purposely make his hand touch my fair white skin.

"Miss Seyoung did you know that you're gifted with a beautiful look?" he said the cheesy thing and suddenly grab my hand. I was startled and brush away his hand from mine, and smile awkwardly.

"Haha, thanks for the compliment. I guess I make my leave first." quickly I bow and run to escape and I didn't turn when he call for me. My chest raise up and down the moment I slammed the door closed behind me and I lean my back against the door.

"ert, ert" I shout,nope, I was talking by myself with the lowest pitch. I bet not even an ant could hear what I say.  I walk back to my place like a zombie and I noticed that my phone vibrating, signing there were KaTalk that were send in for me. I slide it open and read the message from my friend, Hye Rim.

"Seyounggie~ are you coming to visit me today?"

"Yeah I will after I done with my work. I'm going to take the result last examination in your hospital, guess I will drop by to your room." I touch the button send to reply her and just a few second after that she reply me back.

"I'll wait for you. Anyway I have something to tell you! Come quickly okey dear Seyounggie?"

My lips carved a smile but I couldn't reply her back when suddenly a call come in. I put down my phone and start my work.

I bring along the macaron that Hye Rim like with me to the hospital. And a bouquet of white Peony mix with small petite Baby Breath flower around it which I buy out of symphaty.

"Just why I but this flower? It's not Hye Rim like flower that much."

I just stare at the pitiful flower that going to be thrown away by me. The more I look at it, the more I remember about the ahjumma that sell this flowers. When I walk out from buying the macaron from a cafe, I saw a very old ahjumma, so weak, but she still working to get some money from selling flowers. I felt pity towards her so I decided to buy some, which way I want to help her. But now, I don't know what to do with this.

"Then, lets just pretend that I don't know that Hye Rim doesn't like flowers. Gosh, she is a weird girl!" I pressed the elevator button to 7th floor. When it stop at 7th floor, I walk out to the hallway and searching for Hye Rim room, which stupidly I got confused.

"Is it 706 or 707?" I scratch my head that were not itchy and try to figure it out. So, I just decided to just try my luck and went into room 706 first. When I slide open the door, the room was grave silent and only the beep sound from the machine that could be heard. Hye Rim were nowhere to be found so I walked into the room and hastly I open the curtain in front of me, just to see a man with a very good look, with a brunette black hair that cover his forehead, lying on the bed with respiratory supporter on his mouth and a few tube connected at his arm.

"Hye Rim must be on the next room." I talk slowly not to wake him up and walk like a thief so my heel won't make any sound. But then I stopped my step when an idea come into my mind. I walk back to the sleeping unknown handsome man, to his bed side where I found a crystal clear vase on the side table. I unwrapped the plastic and arrange the flowers inside the vase. When I was satisfied with its position, I turned away to look at him.

"Mister, I wish you will get healthy soon." After I wish him, I walk out from his room and goes into the next room just to shock myself when my 3 years crush was also there, laughing happily with Hye Rim. I froze when I see the scene. Hye Rim how notice my existance break my thought when she call for me.

"Seyoung, you are here! What are you doing there? Come in"

My crush, Ki Bum, also turn to look at me with his mesmerizing smile. My face turn red when I look him in the eyes. I walk to Hye Rim at the other side with my head still focusing on the floor.

"How do you do Seyoung?" he asked me and I nod my head and answered 'Great'. I pull my scarlet hair to the back of my ear and pretend to cough to hide my nervousness.

"Seyoung you should congratulate me!" Hye Rim took my hand into her hand with a sweet smile on her face. I fall into confusion, does she have a mental illness? Why I should congratulate to her because she broke her leg?

"Ki Bum and I, we getting marry!" My eyes widen when I hear her announcement but she just throw her arm to hug me.

"But didn't you two..have broken up?"my mouth slipped a question which I shouldn't say.

"Eyy Seyoung~ why you say like that? I just get back with your friend and I just proposed to her. And she say yes." He said happily and the way they look each other, they still love each other. Why I'm being upset? Hye Rim is your friend, Park Seyoung! You should congratulate them, not drenched yourself with tears.

"Congratulation. Yah Hye Rim, you must make me your bridesmaid okey?" I couldn't believe myself that I, Park Seyoung, congratulate to the women that getting marry to my crush. Couldn't bear with sadness, I put down the box of macaron on her table and stood up from my seat.

"Ah Hye Rim I should take my leave first. I have an appointment with the doctor."I bit her a farewell and just get myself out from the room before I burst with tears. As I walked to the registration counter with my eyes still producing a crystal water at the corner of my eyes, suddenly a young nurse approached me from behind.

"Miss Seyoung?"

"Yes that is me?"

"Dr Lee have been expecting you, please follow me." she said nicely and I just followed her to the doctor room. When I went into the room and take my seat next to his table, his face doesn't look good when he monitor something on the screen.

"Park Seyoung sshi..what I'm going to say, you have to accept it with an open heart."he have a sad look on his face when he look at me. I grab tight my skirt in nervous.

"What is wrong with me?" I said with a tremble voice. It took a few second for him to say it and the result crush my life totally. I might go crazy when I hear result.

"You were diagonised with pancreatic cancer. You are at the final stage. Any medicine or treatment, couldn't help you anymore."

"This is not a joke right doctor? I don't feel sick or naeseous or anything. I'm perfectly fine" I try to go against him. This is not what I want to hear.

"Did you frequently have pain around your lower part? At your stomache?"

I was going to say no but then I realized that I was really in pain when I woke up in the morning. Almost everyday. It attack me anytime.

"That is the symptom of this cancer miss."

I fall into silent and my mind turn to blank. What sin did I have done to receive such punishment? I still have a long way to go. I'm still young.

"Doctor, how long I could survive?"

"At very long will be 6 months or at very least, just 3 months."

I my lips and brush my hair to the back. It hard to believe I had such a fatal disease. I thought nothing is wrong. My hand already shaking from fear, thinking how I will die. Just then, a nurse come into the room in rush to call out for the doctor.

"Dr. Lee, patient in room no 706 has woken up."

The doctor asked me to wait for awhile and he rush out to see the patient. How could I wait here? There is nothing he could do anyway. So I get my way back to my house, with a heart that broken into a thousand pieces.

The very first chapter~

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