... That went faster than expected. Anyway, I think I'm okay with putting this one up now.

The first out of ten ficlets!

Song: Call Me When You're Sober - Evanescence
Pairing: BaeRi/SunTory/SunRi
Word count: 772

Thanks to Shaeneice for the song title!

Youngbae’s used to it. It doesn’t bother him anymore – at least, that’s what he tries to tell himself every time it happens. He has pretty much given up, resigned himself to the fact that the maknae of Bigbang will never come to love him as Youngbae loves him.

It’s a fact that threatens to break him, especially knowing that, no matter what, he loves the maknae, and he can’t just ignore that. It’s not easy, not at all, and it’s even harder to fall out of love.

At least, that’s what Youngbae thinks.

He’s tired, though, so tired of going through this every time. He’s so tired of it.

So this time, when his phone rings late at night, he puckers his lips, frowning, and reaches for the phone, his finger sliding over the screen to accept the incoming call.

“Hyuuuuuuung!” the maknae’s drunken voice immediately sounds and Youngbae’s heart drops despite everything.

He’d hoped. He always hopes. And his hope always shatters.

“Hyuuung!” Seungri whines before it turns into that loud, characteristic laughter of his. “Hyung, hyung, you know what? You’re the best, hyung! I love you!”

“Maknae…” Youngbae warns, his heart hurting at the words slipping so carelessly from Seungri’s mouth. At any other time, he’d be happy – ecstatic – to hear those last three precious words from Seungri, but the maknae is drunk and won’t even remember calling Youngbae when he wakes in the morning with a hangover.

And worse yet, those three words don’t mean what Youngbae so wishes them to.

“You know I love you, right?” Seungri continues happily, obliviously. “I don’t tell you enough, y’know. You’re, like, always there, y’know, but I don’t tell you nearly enough and it’s my fault, sorry, hyung, but I really mean it and you’re really the best and – hey, hey, why aren’t you here? You always stay home! Hyuuuung, you should be here and party with us, yeah!”

“Seungri-ya, go back to the party,” Youngbae sighs, closing his eyes. “Don’t call me.”

“Hyuuuuung!” He’s back to whining. “I lov-“

“Call me when you’re sober,” Youngbae snaps in a moment of frustration and ends the call, throwing the phone away and then cursing himself quietly. He buries himself in the bed sheets, pressing the pillow against his ear to keep out the noises from his phone.

He doesn’t want to answer. He doesn’t want to talk with the man he loves because the man doesn’t love him back. He doesn’t want to. He’d much rather stay in bed and curse love and wonder why he always ends up falling in love with people he can’t get.

He’s almost fallen asleep by the time everyone returns from the party. He waits and, as expected, it doesn’t take long before the door to his room opens and he feels someone sit down on the bed.

“Hyung? Are you angry with me?”

Youngbae curses his own inability to keep the promises he makes to himself.

He stays quiet for a while before he turns around, letting his head emerge from under the sheet in order to look up at the maknae. “I’m not angry,” he admits gently. It just isn’t possible for him to be angry with Seungri.

Seungri lightens up in a bright smile and Youngbae wants to laugh but he also wants to cry. “That’s why I love you, hyung!”

Youngbae’s smile is pained. “Go to bed.”

“I am in bed, pabo hyung,” he whines, lying down and sticking out his tongue at Youngbae.

“Your own.”

“Why not here? I’m too tired. I might as well sleep here. My room is too far away.”

And, once again, Youngbae resigns, letting his maknae sleep in his bed because what else can he do?

His heart belongs to the maknae and no matter how hard he tries, he cannot be mean to him. No matter how hard he tries, he cannot stay away.

He watches Seungri’s face, imprinting the lips, the eyes and the nose in his mind – a silly thing to do seeing as he could never ever forget the face of his beloved. No, it’s just an excuse to observe his sleeping maknae and he knows it.

“I love you. Sleep well.”

And in the morning, the maknae is awake and hyper despite whining about a hangover and his hyungs all snort at him and scold him for partying too hard and drinking so much.

Youngbae merely watches with a smile because, truly, that’s all he can do.

Smile and hope for the day when his love for the maknae is gone because only then will he be able to breathe easily again.

... Well. Hope you liked it!

Next ficlet will be up in a couple of days. Maybe. I don't really like it as it is now, so... We'll see.

Have any of you watched Bride of the Century? I absolutely love it!

Thanks for reading!