chapter warning: self-harm. (written through my ipod, I apoligize in advance for the mistakes

there's a reason why i don't like writing sequel, ideas are everywhere so the story goes on and on and on. ;_;

"let me go". the older boy uttered, struggling to pull his hand out of Sehun's tight grasp, but he was left unheard as the latter continued to drag him out of the café until they've reached a secluded place.

Sehun let go of Luhan, facing him as the other nurse his aching wrist.

"what the happened in there?" the taller boy started, each word he said was laced with anger that had Luhan looking up to him in fear. 

Their eyes met and Sehun couldn't comprehend the emotions reflecting on the pair of doe-like eyes. 

longing, hurt, fear, betrayal, love? 

He was frustrated when Luhan continued to look at him so he decided to just leave the other but even before he could fully turn around, he faintly heard Luhan said something.

Sehun looked at him again. "what?" he asked, voice firm.

and it took Luhan a huge amount of courage to repeat his question. he could feel his heart beating up to his throat, his chest tightening.He know he'll get hurt even more with what he's going to ask, but he wanted to know; he needed to. 

"what does Baekhyun have that I-I don't?" 

If Sehun was taken aback with the question he didn't dare show it as he maintained the ugly scowl on his face. Earlier at their university's cafeteria, he wanted Luhan to ask about him & Baekhyun's relationship, to explain to him everything that his current boyfriend said but right now due to his anger with what Jongin and Luhan did inside the cafè. 

He wanted nothing but make Luhan feel miserable like he is now. 

Sehun's scowl was replaced by a smirk as he stared at Luhan who quickly looked away, moving a step backward as he grasp the hem of his offwhite button-down shirt. 

the taller student was amused watching the other boy stood nervously in front him, he would have laugh, teased the other but Sehun's mind was clouded with anger, yes it was anger not jealousy. Why would he even be jealous when there's no reason to be.

Sehun gritted his teeth, jaw tigthening as what he saw earlier flash inside his mind, igniting the anger he feels even more.
He walked closer to Luhan, startling the latter as he cupped its left jaw using his right hand; thumbing the flawless, soft cheek as he gently tilted his head upward until their eyes met.

Luhan's heart beat was a chaos inside his chest, he knew Sehun could feel on his jugular as he continued to caress his check. Luhan should be happy at what is happening now but the longer he stared at Sehun's eyes, the more he knew that everything between th already ended. 

without second thought, Sehun crashed their lips together. teeth clashing but he didn't care, he wanted Luhan to feel pain, he wanted to erase the feel of Jongin's lips against the other so he bit on them, hard until it bleed as he continued to ravish Luhan's lips who was just standing there, unmoving, as every rough move of Sehun's lips against his, his heart broke more that it already is. 

Sehun continued until his lungs burn for the need to breath. He pulled away from the unreciprocated kiss, pressing his forehead against Luhan as he breath deeply.

after a few seconds, the evil smirk appeared on Sehun's handsome face again as he saw the cut of Luhan's lower lip. 

"you wanted to know my answer". he started as the shorter boy continued to stare at him, face void of emotion that Sehun expects to see. 

"Baekhyun is way much better than
you are, Lu. That's why I never regret cheating behind your back". the younger mocked, staring straight at Luhan's eyes, the only thing that shows what Luhan really feels inside.

"he never force me to do anything I don't like". he stop when a voice inside his head shouted something that he knew he is. 

"I like, no, i love everything about him." 

Sehun would have continued more but Luhan nodded his head as if saying that he already understand.

Luhan's lips curved to a weak, forced smile as he lifted his head to look at Sehun. 

"I-i love you, Sehun. Just don't forget that." he said one last time before he turned to leave before he cries in front of the man he loves. 

He understood now. He really wasn't the person that Sehun would need. He lacks everything that Sehun wanted and no matter how much it hurts, it wasn't enough. 

Sehun watched Luhan walked away until his back disappeared. He have so much to tell him, so much LIES he need to tell him so he would know that Luhan still loves you. 

He said he does but Sehun wanted more because deep inside him, he wants Luhan back and that want is slowly eating him inside. 

------

the second he closed the door of his dorm room, Luhan leaned his back against it, legs feeling weak as he slumped onto the floor. Choking sobs wrecked his body as he cried his heart out, right fist hitting his chest repeatedly to conceal all the pain inside him. 

He curled into the floor forehead pressed hardly against the cold cement of his room, hands gripping and pulling his hair with all his strength until he felt his scalp being ripped from his head.

he needed so much pain to forget and still, it wasn't enough. 

Luhan didn't know what he did wrong or what he lacks for their relationship to end just like that.

He gave everything, he loves him more that himself and if Luhan could give his life to Sehun, he would but he knew that it will not change anything now. 

Luhan stood up with wobbly legs, holding onto anything within his grasp for support until he reached his study table.

he was breathing deeply, air lacking inside his lungs because of his crying and hard sobs.

with blurred sight due to his unending tears, Luhan searched for the blade inside his drawer, grasping it tightly not minding how it cut through his fingers and palm as he slumped again on the floor.

he watched as crimson liquid slowly flow from his closed hand down to his forearm. He let out an empty chuckle, tears flowing again from his now red and swollen eyes. Luhan slowly opened his hand, took the blade from his bleeding palm and positioned it above his wrist, exactly above his strong, beating radial pulse.

'just one move and everything will end' he told himself and was about to move the blade when suddenly, a hand stop him.

Luhan looked up but wasn't able to know who the person was before he fell into unconciousness.