Background Information: Luhan is a Chinese middle schooler with a Korean boyfriend named Sehun, who is also in middle school. They met over the Internet a couple months ago and have since started dating. Their relationship was inevitably discovered by their friends shortly after. Everyone is in the same grade. Basically, this is about idiots going through an awkward stage in life (puberty) while in a long distance relationship.

Author's Message: I'm so sorry for not updating. I'm not going to list my reasons, as they will probably bore you to death, so I hope you enjoy this little one-shot I wrote at two in the morning last night. (It probably lacks some comedic factors, but whatever.) Unfortunately, it has nothing to do with pick-up lines - but I promise to get to those very soon!

Warning: Extremely OOC.

This has not been pre-read.

“So how does your relationship work with the whole long distance thing?” Yifan asked Luhan one day as they were leaving the classroom after school.

“What do you mean?” Luhan asked looking up at Yifan. “Like talking and stuff? We mostly text.”

Minseok interrupted Yifan and Luhan’s conversation, coming up behind them and slinging an arm around Luhan’s shoulders. He shot the boy a (slightly) teasing smile. “What about, you know, more intimate stuff?”

Luhan could feel his face growing hot as he tried to not run away from the conversation. “W-well you can’t really do stuff like that over text.”

“Sure you can.” Zitao added in, smirking in a way that made the recent color to Luhan’s face disappear in an instant. “It’s called ting. Though of course you being the innocent thing you are you wouldn’t know how.”

The drawl and stuck up way that Zitao was speaking made Luhan’s blood boil as it usually did and, as every one of his friends figured he would, Luhan rose up to Zitao’s teasing.

“Of course I know how! Definitely, I could definitely do it if I wanted!” Luhan growled out before hopping onto his bike and leaving behind a laughing Zitao and a Yifan that knew nothing good was going to come from this.

.

Luhan: Would you like to kiss me?

“Oh.” Jongin laughed looking over Sehun’s shoulder. “How bold of him.”

Sehun quickly turned the phone over on top of his book as Jongin walked around to the other side of the table with a few reference books that he had gotten off of the shelves of the library.

“It’s rude to read peoples messages.” Sehun mumbled out itching to pick up his phone again to reply to Luhan and ask him what made him ask that.

“Well when someone stares blankly at their phone for five minutes without moving people, me included, get curious.” Jongin smirked before opening one of his books. “Don’t mind me, reply to your boyfriend.”

Sehun blushed before grabbing his phone and hiding it under the edge of the table so Jongin couldn’t see. He didn’t really understand why Luhan suddenly wanted to know but Sehun figured he should at least be truthful.

Sehun: Yes.

It wasn’t long before his phone buzzed and he ignored the chuckle from Jongin and opened the message.

Luhan: Would you like to do other things too?

Luhan really needed to learn to be more specific sometimes.

Sehun: Like what?

Luhan: Hug?

Not really sure why Luhan wanted to know Sehun texted back quickly answering the question truthfully and asking one of his own.

Sehun: Yes. Why?

It took nearly seven minutes before the next text came and Sehun kept glancing at his phone the whole time wondering if he had answered the wrong way. He even checked twice just to make sure that the message had actually sent.

Luhan: Uh… what about kissing with like tongue and stuff?

Sehun blushed causing Jongin to look at him, eyebrows raised in question, but Sehun just ignored him and stared at his phone still confused but decided that it was best to be truthful. I mean they were dating, they hadn’t gotten to that kind of stuff in their relationship yet but it’s not like Sehun didn’t want to.

Sehun: Yes.

The next reply took even longer and Sehun had begun to worry if he might have scared Luhan but when his phone finally buzzed the worry was replaced by confusion.

Luhan: What about… touching?

Touching? Well you can’t really kiss or hug without touching. Confusion ate away at him and Sehun was sure that Jongin was looking at him like he was insane but he didn’t really care. Not wanting to answer in the wrong way Sehun figured it was best to ask what Luhan meant.

Sehun: Touching?

The next reply seemed to come instantly and Sehun froze once he opened the message.

Luhan: You know… each other like down there and stuff.

Sehun was sure he was on fire at the moment from all of the blood that rushed to his face. Glad that Jongin couldn’t read what Luhan had written he quickly typed out his reply before hiding his face in his hands and ignoring Jongin who seemed to really want to know what Luhan said if the questioning look was any indication.

Sehun: Yes.

The reply came immediately but Sehun wasn’t able to open the text until a few moments later, slightly frightened about what other questions Luhan would ask.

Luhan: Okay! Thanks!

Well at least it wasn’t another question like that, Sehun thought.

Sehun wasn’t really sure if he’d be able to handle any more.

.

“Idiot.” Zitao snickered as he read through the texts that Luhan had practically shoved into his face as he’d entered the clubroom. “That isn’t ting, that’s an interrogation.”

Luhan blushed and quickly grabbed the phone out of Zitao’s hands.

How couldn’t it be ting, Luhan thought, it was an intimate conversation right?

“W-well then what’s the right way?” Luhan stammered out looking around at his friends who all seemed to blush even harder than Luhan before making excuses and rushing out of the room.