Birthdays.

Why was it such an important thing? Why must the phrase go "Happy Birthday" and not "Sad Birthday" because some people just don't like birthdays. It reminded them how much older they were than the year before or something bad happened on their birthday or it could be that it reminded them something they didn't want to remember. Joonmyun was one of those people. He has no actual reason why he hates his birthday, he just does.

Although it all changed when Yifan came into his life. Wu Yifan, the tall scary glaring Canadian-Chinese man who surprisingly has a heart full of love and lots of plushies and is actually a big baby and Joonmyun knows this cos he seen it first hand. During the first year they were friends, Yifan was actually the first person to wish him a happy birthday and the first person to give him a present at exactly 12 'o clock. Joonmyun didn't know why it made him smile but it did and he was happy the whole day.

Ever since then, Joonmyun knew he could look forward for his birthday. So long as there is Yifan in his life, he could might actually enjoy his birthday.

The frist time they heard the news that EXO was actually going to be divided into two groups, K & M, to say that they were sad was an understatement. They were devastated. They thought they were going to be performing together and when Joonmyun found out that Yifan was going to be promoting in China and him here in Korea, he couldn't help but drop everything and walked away from the practice room. The others didn't see it but Yifan did. He too drops everything and proceeds to follow Joonmyun out of the practice room. He left just in time to see that ends of the checkered sweater that was tied around Joonmyun's waist turned a left at the corner.

Yifan jogs and in just no time was right behind Joonmyun and he didn't have to make his presence known because that's how well they are attuned to one another. They kept on walking until they reached to the last room of the practice hall and enters. 

The last room of that practice room with the piano, the one that SM fans knows about, the haunted room that Taemin was afraid of was the room where Joonmyun and Yifan hangs out together all the time. It was actually them who was playing the piano that night when Taemin was going to practice and it was Yifan who slammed the keys together, making Taemin ran out out of the room for his life. 

Joonmyun sat down on the piano and started pressing one key by one and although it was played slowly, it was one of the many piece that Joonmyun loves to play. This piece however is played whenever he's sad or down for no reason and it was just one of the many things that is Joonmyunish that's tuck into the file in his head. Joonmyun continues to play slowly and bit by bit the pianist starts to play it faster and faster and faster than it should have been played and in no time, Joonmyun wins against the piece and he breathes rapidly in order to control the burning feeling that's in his chest. 

"Are you done?" Yifan asks him and Joonmyun turns around to glare at him through his tears, sitting on the floor, back leaning on the door. Yifan just looks impassive but Joonmyun can see that he too wants to cry because they promised, pinky swear promised each other that they'll perform together from the first day they ever step on a stage until the ends of their career. " you Yifan."

"Well I can assure you that actually won't help us in this situation. In fact, I think it'll make everything worse. But you know what would make me feel better? If you just stop crying like a ing baby and come here and hug me too because I think I'm going to cry as well." After the end of Yifan's sentence, Joonmyun was already walking towards the tall man and hugs him too and there they both cried like ing babies.

At the end of the tears and the somewhat broken wish they shared, they wipe their tears off and looked at each other. Yifan ruffles the shorter person's hair and tells him that they needed to make a new wish since there's no way that this one was going to happen. Joonmyun thinks quietly and Yifan gets up to move towards the piano and plays a bit of something that he learned from Joonmyun's personal lessons. Joonmyun then moves and sits beside him and corrects a few things.

"So did you get a new wish?" Yifan asked while his fingers glides over the white tiles. Joonmyun nods. "So what is it?" Joonmyun doesn't answer and instead shakes his head. "You're not gonna tell me?" The shake of his head moves again. Yifan glares at the smaller man and asks him why not. "You'll just have to wait till my birthday to find out."

"Wha-wha-what? Joonmyun, your birthday is like 3 months away from now. By then I don't even know where I'll be." Joonmyun then stands up and walks away from Yifan to open the door. "Then I guess you'll never find out now would you?" And just then he bolts out from the room with Yifan hot on his tails. "You punk, come back here and tell me!"

"NEVER!"

Yifan never really did find out the other day and thank God, he was still in Korea when joonmyun's birthday arrived. As always, he stays up at night and had already prepared a present for little Joonie where it was safely tuck under his pillow and as soon as the clock strikes twelve, phone in hand, he calls Joonmun eventhough they are living under one roof but where's the fun in walking up to his room and wishing him a happy birthday.

Joonmyun answers and he was already smiling.

"Yifan."

"Joonmyun."

"Happy birthday."

"Thank you."

"Are you going to tell me now?"

"Of course, I'm a man of my word."

And Joonmyun tells him and Yifan was touched and eventhough they had practice early morning later that day, those two kept on talking in small voices and until the sun rose up and the both of them were out of their rooms, their phone was still on their ears when they reached the kitchen. "Morning Yifan."

"Morning to you too. Oh, and happy birthday." This year was no different than the years before. For sure, the day where Joonmyun will always have a small smile on his face was the day when it was his birthday.

This year however is different. It's been two years since they debuted and the amount of love they've recieved was nothing short of overwhelming. To throw all of those away is stupid and stupid and stupid. Just plain old stupid.

The company is not pleased but Joonmyun could care less about what they think. What's more important is how the members and fans are doing, holding up against these news surrounding them. So many of them are staying up late at night just to check on them and seriously, Joonmyun can never be anymore grateful. They were sweating buckets of sweats and there's only two days till the day of their first solo concert.

Amazingly, they were doing great even with a member short. Who needs him? Certainly not us. They practiced till late in the morning and finally, they were given a 15-minute break to go rest and do . Joonmyun who gave permission to the three youngest members to call any available food outlet and order something, moved to the couch where all his stuff was dumped there before the grueling torture of only 11 members of practice started.

He grabbed his phone blindly from his bag and switched on, only to see there were missed calls from an unknown number since 12 midnight ago. Now its 2.47 in the morning. After all the past experiences of threat and prank calls from sasaeng fans and friends, one would actually think that Joonmyun would be smart enough to not call an unknown number back.

He does wanna do exactly that but something deep inside him, keeps on poking and telling him to call it back since it could be very important and so he does. He waits and randomly checks out himslef in the mirror while he waits for the other line to pick up. He hears it being answered and before he could say anything, he hears that treacherous voice saying that one phrase that has just become his number one hated phrase ever.

"Happy birthday."

His heart plummets down and thank God no one was here.

"You."

"I've never forgotten it before and I won't forget it now." 

"Why are you calling? We don't need you. I don't need you."

"Joonmyun I-"

"What makes you think you can just call me and wish me happy birthday? Because it certainly doesn't feel like a happy birthday to me."

"Joonmyun can you just wait okay? I've been doing this for years now and I'm not going to stop anytime soon. You mean a lot to me."

Joonmyun scoffed. Yifan can't hear it or even see him right now, but his eyes are red and his cheeks are run down by tears. "Obviously not so much since you left. You ing left and you didn't even have the balls to say it to my face why!"

"Joon-"

"Shut up Yifan just shut up! From now on, don't even think of wishing me on my birthday and don't even think of trying on contacting me and don't think nothing's change because all of it changed from the moment you decide to leave us and f- you Yifan. you and damn you to deepest pits of hell and never return."

At that last bit, Joonmyun breaks down with the phone cradled in his hands and he screams when the pain resurfaces from the last few days but tenfold than before. When he was done screaming, he sobs like the child that he actually is at 24 years old and feels someone picking him up and holding him to their chest. He knows this smell and he doesn't want to but he find himself hugging him and leaning more into his chest so he can savour the memory until he dies because what he was about to do was going to break both of their hearts.

He falls back from the embrace and tries to fight off Yifan from touching him. He manages but one of his hand is still in Yifan's grasp and by the looks of it, he's not going to let go.

"Let go of me Yifan." Yifan shakes his head.

"This is not the time for you to be mute and be a stupid child. Let. Me. Go."

Yifan again shakes his head and that does it for Joonmyun. He turns around so fast and smacks his face with his free hand and Yifan was shocked. He turns to look at the angry smaller man. Joonmyun pulls away from his grip and glares at him with so much hate Yifan didn't know he possessed.

"Joonmyun-what?"

"You decided to leave us. Then go. Leave."

"It doesn't have to be like this Joonmyun. Please. You're my best friend. Nothing has to change."

Joonmyun turns to him and looks at him dead in the eye. "It doesn't work like that. Things are different now. You left. It could have been okay for you to say things like that if it was last year. We may be tired, we may be sick but at least we were together. Me and the boys now, we are together, and you were a part of it but you threw that away and it just doesn't work like that anymore. Just go and leave. Let us be."

Every step Joonmyun took, one by one a crack was felt in Yifan's heart. When the door closed, Yifan was just a soulless human being.

You didn't even hear what I have to say.