The First Winter is Always the Longest

Part I

It's early spring time—the sun rests high and warm in the sky, trickling beams of its bright sunlight down to the trees and wild flower bushes below on the forest floor. This time in the season always brings a glowing happiness to all manner of creatures; from the singing families of birds building new nests on the low branches close to their small cosy cabin, to the shy new baby bunnies poking their twitching noses out from their burrows at the edge of their garden. Although, you can't really call it much of a garden, if you consider the entire forest their home, as Jiyong does. They own no patch of land or soil in this vast and beautiful place, they are simply the caretakers of the creatures who dwell within.

Speaking of which... two very cheeky and mischievous creatures are creeping a little too close to the fox's nesting burrow for Jiyong's liking. He knows the young male fox has just found his life-mate and she is close to birthing their pups, so naturally the fox has become more territorial than usual. It's to be expected, after all, Seunghyun had grown just as protective when Jiyong had been nursing their children.

"Haru! Shion! Come back to the house!" Jiyong calls out to his two meddlesome children and almost runs off after them when he sees Shion pull on his little sister's curly ponytails but he's stopped by a very firm, warm hand on his shoulder.

"Leave them be, Jiyong, they're only exploring together." Seunghyun rounds on him to block out Jiyong's view of their two children, rolling his eyes when Jiyong lifts up to his tippy toes to peak over those broad shoulders of his husband. He has to shove Jiyong back inside their cabin with a forceful grip, trying not to relent to those red pouting lips. "You know I would never allow any harm to befall upon them. They will be safe together. Please, my love," Seunghyun plays unfairly by nuzzling Jiyong's cheek and sliding his hands along Jiyong's sides, his fingers tickling his skin lightly before settling over his rounded hips. "You should be resting and placing these worries aside, you'll upset the baby."

And just like magic, the growing baby inside Jiyong's swollen belly begins wriggling around and kicking at the sound of its father's voice. Seunghyun's smooth, deep voice has been the quickest way to excite and calm down each baby as Jiyong has gone through pregnancy. They have always been drawn to their father, instantly recognising him as their protector.

"You've woken her up," Jiyong whispers with a tired smile forming on his lips. Seunghyun's hands are so warm and ease his aching body, and Jiyong can feel his eyes slip closed as a soft moan slips from his lips. "Now you'll have to sing her back to sleep," he twinkles those brown eyes up at Seunghyun, loving the slight blush forming on Seunghyun's usually composed face. The only time Seunghyun ever sings to Jiyong is when he's pregnant, never being able to deny his needy husband.

"You are evil," Seunghyun growls but there's a grin pulling at the corner of his lips as he carries Jiyong over to their bed to lay him down gently.

"How else could I fool you into loving me?" Jiyong teases him and pulls him down on the bed beside him.

"Who says we shall have a girl for our third child?" Seunghyun narrows his eyes as he looms over him.

"Who says it shall be a boy?" Jiyong challenges, not once breaking eye contact with his wolf.

"I do. I can sense him, my little boy growing inside you."

"It could be twins."

"It could be."

Seunghyun pushes him on his back and kisses that cheeky grin off Jiyong's face, gliding his hands over Jiyong's smooth bump and tickling the sensitive flesh across his stomach. Never in all his life, did Jiyong think it would be possible to be this happy, to find the man of his dreams—quite literally—and have a family with him.

***

With a forlorn sigh, Jiyong tries his best to hold on to that happiness buried deep inside his chest but it slowly evaporates. When his eyes blink open, all the light and warmth inside him disappears when he remembers where he is. He's not warm and safe inside his home; he's out in the open forests, alone. It's not early spring time; it's the dead middle of winter. The bitter winter air catches his breath and swirls it into mist that lifts up into the air to vanish before his eyes. That dream haunts Jiyong. Almost every night of the new season change, the same dream invades his mind and remains with him until the next season comes along.

Deep in his heart of hearts, Jiyong knows it's not really a dream but a glimpse into their future. He's never been more certain about anything else in his life. The images paint across his memory so clearly and in such minute detail that it couldn't possibly be a cruel fable created by his subconscious. The feelings that linger deep inside his heart, the comfort and warmth of his family, the smell of the crisp fresh forest full of new life at spring, the sounds of the animals playing together and the swaying of the trees in the breeze. It's all real. It's far too real. The ache in his soul suddenly returns, as it always does. With one hand clasping his thick red cape over his heart and the other tightly threaded through his dampened locks of hair, Jiyong tries to keep himself from falling apart.

The solid surface of the tree trunk propping his weary body up is beginning to freeze in the harsh winds, the chill of winter slowly making its way deep into his bones. Jiyong knows he should get up, force his legs to move, trek back home to the village. And yet he can't bring himself to leave this place. The war of his head and his heart wages on until his head feels so heavy, weighed down with countless ignored thoughts and emotions that Jiyong feels like his neck may snap. It's all too easy for Jiyong to recall that fateful day when they first crossed paths, all it takes is for him to close his eyes. He can recall with perfect clarity the feeling in the air on that day, with the promise of the coming winter. The golden brown leaves surrounded his sight, smell and sound as they crunched and crumbled to dust beneath his boots.

The harsh reality before him is a clear reminder that he hasn't seen his wolf since that first taste of harsh winter. The cold winds can be so unforgiving in these times to those with an aching heart. The reason for the ache in his muscles and body isn't just for all the bitter needles of snowflakes getting trapped inside his coat. It's due to how many long, lightless days have passed since then. Jiyong would love to be able to say it's only been half a season since the wolf crossed his path but the miserable truth is an entire year has passed since that day. Jiyong has seen every season come and go without his wolf by his side and now has to face a second winter alone. Without so much as a fleeting glimpse or faint howling in the distance, Jiyong has almost given up hope.

Only when his fingertips begin to throb from the iciness surrounding him does Jiyong finally call it another lonely day over and done with. Thankfully the sun still has a far way to go before it sinks below the horizon, leaving him with sufficient time to make it back home before the veil of night falls over the forests. On aching legs, Jiyong trudges through the thick cushion of slushy whiteness beneath his boots, pulling his hood over his head to fend off more snowflakes melting in his chestnut locks. Another cheerless sigh escapes him, brown eyes staring at the white ground with an emptiness which consumes his entire being. The red riding hood, bathing in milk and honey, bringing an apple with him to bite into—he does all these things out of force of habit, because if he stops doing even one of his routines then it means his heart truly has given up hope. Something he cannot allow to happen.

He knows that their souls are bound to one another, that their lives were always meant to cross paths but then why has he been forced to be alone, without the other half of him?

Jiyong has had no choice but to spend his time working at his parent's bakery, forcing his tired body to slip out of his warm bed in the early morning hours, even before the sun has woken up. The days are long and hard on him but it's the only way he can busy himself to distract his mind from wandering to a certain white haired wolf. When the days are done, Jiyong still doesn't allow himself to rest and opts to spend his evenings with his mother, carefully perfecting the skills of such a talented seamstress. There's a quiet determination deep within him to inherit all of his mother's knowledge so that one day she can smile upon him and tell him how proud she is. After all, she is the only seamstress in their village and no one else within the town has considered taking up the art. Nothing ever changes in this small town; the townsfolk still fear the woods and what lurks behind those dark shadows even more than before.

After Jiyong crossed paths with his wolf, more and more animal carcasses began turning up closer to the edges of the forest. Immediately Jiyong knew it meant his wolf was close by, keeping a watchful on him eye and placing him under his protection. But naturally the townsfolk began to circulate fear and paranoia amongst each other; ‘the wolf has begun to crave our flesh and blood’ they would cry out in the town square ‘soon it shall be our bodies littering the forests floor’. How foolish Jiyong thought them to be, thinking themselves so important to the wolf that it was their bodies he was after. He knew his wolf, and his wolf did not want for anything but his body. Still, it caused a panicked manhunt through the forests for the entire season of fall.

It had been under the reddening leaves of autumn when they found each other and laid claim to their bodies but before Jiyong knew it, winter was here and gone in the blink of an eye. One entire season went by without even a single whisper from his white wolf or the sound of his howl. Surely after the fear in the village died and their panic settled back to its usual hushed whispers of the dangerous wolf, his love would return. But that time never came. Had his town finally succeeded in chasing the big bad wolf away? Had he lost his love before he truly had a chance with him? With so much time lost between them, Jiyong only has his thoughts for company and his fading memories. As the months stretch on, the memories of their fated meeting begin to fade around the edges. It would be impossible for him to forget the brilliant shine in those sharp blue eyes which at first drew him in with the bottomless depths of midnight black.

When his heart is at its weakest, he begins to doubt reality and questions whether his wolf was real or a figment of his imagination. Perhaps nothing as wonderful and pure as true love exists outside the realm of fantasy. When these poisoned thoughts plague his mind, his shaking hands reach out for the long silver chain around his neck—fashioned by his own skilled hands to be the perfect length to conceal his precious ring away from prying eyes. His wolf is real, his wolf is coming back for him—the ring he left in Jiyong's possession is solid proof of that fact. The cool metal soon warms in his palm, and the moment he finds himself locked away in the safety of his room he slips the ring on to his thumb. The smallest of smiles graces his lips in a rare moment of happiness at the memory of finding the ring delicately slipped on to his thumb when he awoke in the forests. Intricately woven metal fit snugly on his wolf's thick finger but even on his thumb it's still a little too loose. Nevertheless, it doesn't trouble Jiyong in the slightest, because having the ring on his finger grounds him and helps to anchor him to his memories.

The fact that his parents strictly forbid him from venturing into the dark, dangerous woods more than once a week to visit his grandmother only serves to challenge the strength of Jiyong's heart. But it means his time is limited. Precious short minutes are all he has to spare to sit and wait in the woods—just in case, just by chance that his wolf will walk by. As the wind picks up around him, Jiyong chastises himself for wasting so much time sitting under that tree. After a full day spent with his grandmother, picking any spices and herbs left untouched by winter’s icy grip, his parents will be expecting him home in time for dinner. By some small grace, the weather seems to be favouring the young boy by the end of his journey home as the wind dies off and the sun peaks out through the heavy clouds for one last shower of sunlight.

Not being able to resist one last moment to indulge himself before its back to his hard-working life at the bakery, Jiyong stops under a short tree with long, twisting branches. The snow is slowly beginning to melt, dripping ice colds droplets from the leafless branches for Jiyong to catch on his tongue. A soft smile spreads across his parted lips, for these quiet moments he has to himself in the forest are the only moments he feels an inkling of life pumping through his veins. Jiyong is too afraid to be honest even with himself because then he will have to admit that the rest of the time, he's merely existing. With a careful eye trained on a fat droplet of water, Jiyong catches it on the tip of his tongue and it into his warm mouth when he suddenly feels a shiver trickle down his spine. And it's not from the chill in the air.

Jiyong spins around so quickly that the hood protecting his head slips down, revealing his reddened cheeks and nose from the cold. Immediately, Jiyong finds himself breathless as he stares into a pair of blue eyes locked on his unmoving form. The clear depths of blue dazzle at him just like the frozen lakes and streams winding through the forests. That familiar mess of hair blends into the endless whiteness of the snow, even breaths coming out in foggy warm air and if Jiyong closes his eyes, he swear he can feel that warm breath ghosting over his face. But when he opens his eyes, it dawns on him that with a few steps he can have that warmth back. Without another moment's hesitation, Jiyong runs towards him, closing the distance in a matter of heartbeats. With unwavering trust, Jiyong leaps into his arms, knowing he'll be caught as he wraps his legs around that solid waist once more. The wolf catches him with those strong arms Jiyong remembers so clearly, holding him close to the warmth radiating off every inch of his body. With a light nudge, Jiyong obediently holds him back, slipping his trembling arms to tightly lock his fingers at the base of his neck.

Minutes go by, possibly hours, the two of them calmly staring into each other's eyes, reacquainting themselves with each other's unique scent; apples and honey and spices and sunlight. The countless times Jiyong has dreamt of this moment, he never once imagined they would spend it in silence. Words are not yet needed between them, instead they allow their bodies to become familiar once again and for now their body language does all the taking. Seunghyun effortlessly supports Jiyong's weight, running his large palms over the underside of his thighs, clad only in woollen thigh high socks. The touch is welcomed, for more reasons than one but one thing is certain—Jiyong can feel heat travel all over his skin where his wolf's hands reach. The boy clings to him with a suffocating grip tight enough to allow the wolf to freely roam his hands all over his body, without the worry of Jiyong falling to the snowy floor of the forest. His touch roams everywhere it can reach—the dip of his waist, the tracks of his ribcage, small of his back, bend of his knees.

With a quick survey of the area around them, the wolf spots a fallen, mossy log, almost void of any ice. The little amount of ice which still sticks to the bark isn't enough to bother him, not in the slightest, especially with his precious little human finally safe and sound back in his arms. Even after the wolf sits down on the log, the boy remains firmly in his hold, nestled warmly in his lap. The boy's arms slip inside his thick coat to wrap around his solid back and as if on instinct, his fingers directly seek out the tension in those muscles. Kneading the knots riddled all along his back and shoulders, nimble fingers track the notches of his spine as though it were soft dough to form and shape with his hands. With their faces pressed so closely together, the wolf can feel how Red's blood has chilled right through his body, dropping its natural heat from staying out in the cold for so long. Knowing how cold and hard his body must be feeling, Seunghyun doesn't hesitate another second to wrap his large, fur coats around Jiyong's shivering form—encasing him with so much warmth that he feels safe, protected and loved all at once.

After a time, the sun begins to dip lower in the sky, bringing forth a grey sky which drops the air around them into a deep chill. The sudden coolness allows Seunghyun the freedom to increase Red's temperature by rubbing their cheeks together. With a determination brought on by their separation, Seunghyun tracks the subtle changes in Jiyong's scent, taking in long, drawn-out sniffs at his hair, behind his ear and down his neck. Perhaps he lingers there a little long because the gentle press of his lips against the smooth, pale skin of Jiyong's neck has the boy flushed and gasping for air.

Reluctantly, Seunghyun pulls away from the warm haven of Jiyong's neck to glance up at the rapidly darkening sky before flicking his gaze back at him. Those cool blue eyes rippling with a wealth of sadness and just a hint at the loss shared between them. "It's getting late." The wolf is the first to speak, twisting a lock of Jiyong's hair which is slightly curled from the dense air of their breaths and the damp snowy air. With a heated palm, Seunghyun caresses his entire cheek in attempts of rubbing away the frosty chill. "You should go, Red."

At those words he's been dreading to hear, Jiyong swallows thickly and grimaces at the bitter taste of sorrow curling its frost bitten fingers into his chest. With a quivering bottom lip, he mumbles numbly, "I know." With a soft gasp of air, Jiyong can feel his throat closing up and constricting his lungs until they burn with each and every gasp of frozen oxygen. "But I don't want to leave."

Unable to control himself, Seunghyun smiles a little sadly but his eyes still shine with a fondness for his adorable creature. Dropping his hands from those red cheeks, he toys with the drawstrings tying Jiyong's cape at his chest to draw Jiyong's eyes away from his gaze. "Please do not make this harder than it already is." His voice trembles, causing a tremor though his fingers. To stop his hands from shaking, he clasps their hands together, resting them between their chests pressed tightly together. Through the pulse in his hands, Seunghyun can feel Jiyong's heartbeat change and match pace with his own and he presses even closer still, until there is no space left between them.

"Can I not stay here..." Jiyong gently bumps their foreheads together and sighs, his tired eyes slipping closed. The tender affections from his wolf trickle through his bloodstream, deep into his chilled bones. "...with you?"

"You know that you must go back," Seunghyun growls quietly at the back of his throat as the words come out his mouth. With the gentlest of whines, he bumps their noses together, rubbing the tip of Jiyong's red nose. "I promise I will find you again."

"Follow me home?" Jiyong asks simply, the corners of his mouth twitching in a long forgotten smile saved only for his wolf's eyes.

"Always," comes the immediate answer, sealed with a sweet, fleeting kiss that gives life to a soft smile.

***

Jiyong could have sworn that the walk back to his home was much longer, especially if one was to take the long winding back routes which he has been leading his wolf through. The times Seunghyun has secretly followed Jiyong down these paths are too many to count but tonight is the first time Jiyong has lead him directly down the path. No one else bothers to take these twisting turns and bends except for Jiyong, so the pair are safe to walk side by side, without fear of anyone blocking their path. Even with the worry of getting home before it's too dark, Jiyong can only feel a surge of bliss and joy at being with his wolf once more. Like a long forgotten melody he's only just recalled, Jiyong walks with a spring in his step and a smile on his lips that threatens to spill over with his laughter. The strangely shy glances Seunghyun shoots his way only ignites that small spark inside his chest.

The two could gladly continue walking hand-in-hand for hours but before they know it, the pair makes it to their last point before parting ways. If they continue along this path together behind Jiyong's parents house, then they will surely be seen—not just by his parents but any passersby who happen to be out for a late night wander. Knowing their impending separation comes closer with each step they take, Jiyong feels his heart clench so tightly he can feel the fear creeping up his throat and threatening to come out. As they reach the large willow tree blocking them from view of Jiyong's house, the young boy turns around on his wolf and clings to the front of his shirt.

"Come to me, tomorrow night. Please." His voice cracks with utter desperation but Jiyong is too focused on the reply he'll receive to feel any embarrassment.

After an eternity of silence, Seunghyun carefully removes Jiyong's hands from the front of his shirt and claps their hands together. "I cannot venture into the towns again. It's too much of a risk." His voice sounds so cut off and void of any life but Jiyong knows his wolf far better than that, and he notices the way those blue eyes lose their shine.

"Am I not worth the risk?" Jiyong whispers, looking away from him. His wolf can act as tough and cold as he likes, but Jiyong knows better. He notices when the light evaporates from those eyes, he sees all the questioning glances and shy looks thrown his way. His big old wolf is nothing more than an insecure pup seeking reassurance at every turn. The faith his heart clings tells him that his wolf only needs a small push to be brave and claim him again.

"Not when the outcome for one or both of us is death."

The shock at hearing those words spoken so casually freezes Jiyong's body just as the snow falling around them has—but he cannot deny that is the the truth. Jiyong cannot deny the fact that they both would be killed on sight if they were spotted together. But despite all that, Jiyong feels an ache buried so deep inside him he knows it's his soul crying out for the other half.

"But we've been kept a part for so long," Jiyong murmurs sadly, those brown eyes of his falling to stare at the ground between them. "Do fate and luck not owe us this one time together?"

"They owe us nothing, Red," Seunghyun eliminates that small space between them and cups his cheek until Jiyong tilts his gaze back up. "You know very well how much we are tempting fate. Even now, us simply being here in the same space, allowing our emotions to take over—" Seunghyun's eyes swim with so many conflicting emotions Jiyong can barely tell if they are still shinning blue or back to their endless black. "It's a dangerous game we play, Red."

"I don't care about the danger!" Jiyong practically cries out, feeling his eyes tear up. The muscles in his body seize up, telling him not to lash out at such a powerful creature but the pain he has kept buried deep inside pushes through until he can control it no more. Taking Seunghyun by complete surprise, Jiyong shoves him away at an arms length. "I know what I feel in my heart is right! No matter how much others wish to condemn me and say it is wrong... Even if you believe it is wrong for me to love you," he adds with a broken sigh, turning himself away from those piercing eyes.

"I do not say we are wrong..." Seunghyun voices slowly as he gently pulls Jiyong back to face him. The look Jiyong gives him almost causes his knees to buckle, the only creature in all the lands that can hold any power over him. "...but the circumstances of our relationship are less than desirable."

"And what would make it more so?" It hurts to hear his love refer to their relationship as undesirable but to be fair, Jiyong knows it is the sad truth. Nervously flicking his gaze to look at his wolf's face, he isn't surprised to see that he looks pained and guilty. After his question remains unanswered, Jiyong knows Seunghyun doesn't want to say the words 'it's impossible' so to save his wolf from causing him more heartache, he simply nods his head with a quiet "fine." Trying his best to avoid the sickening feeling creeping up his throat, Jiyong avoids his gaze and turns to leave without saying goodbye. Before his boot can crunch down on the soft fallen snow, there is a warm hand to stop him from turning away.

"Red, please. Don't turn your back on me..." Seunghyun loses his breath and for a moment he's confused as to why the oxygen seems to evaporate from his lungs, until it dawns on him that the one and only person to stay by his side has been his Red. If his Little Red turns his back on him, it leaves him with nothing in this world.

It's been so long since Jiyong has heard his voice sound so broken and if it were any other moment, he would feel an overwhelming need to comfort him. But after the long year alone, he is done with comforting his wolf. "Even after you turned your back on me this past year?" Jiyong grits his teeth against the feeling of tears welling up in his eyes. "You say that I am yours and yet you were able to leave me all this time. It could not have been that hard for you then," Jiyong's voice cuts through him, causing his skin to sting all over his body.

There is a wealth of sadness and disappointment in those brown eyes which once held so much light for him. He is the cause of all this. The blame lies solely with Seunghyun, for causing so much heart ache and sorrow to his Red. It's as though all that light has been out of him and replaced with a hollow emptiness. An emptiness that Seunghyun gave to him.

As much as his heart cries out to go to his wolf and trace his cold fingertips across that furrowed brow to ease away the fears and worries etched on his skin, Jiyong knows that this time he must stand his ground."You took my heart with you, the day you left and never returned to me. I waited and I searched and I hunted and I prayed but you never came back. Not once. Not one fleeting glance or faint howl in the distance to inform me you were keeping a safe distance. Nothing. You left me," the sting of fresh tears creeps up on him so suddenly that he has to look away, balling his fists tightly, "you left me with nothing.

"I left to protect you." Seunghyun whispers, startled by how weak every bone and muscle in his body feels. Why can't he find the strength to shout, to yell, to fight. Losing this fight for his heart is the last thing Seunghyun will allow to happen.

"From what?" Jiyong demands.

"From me," Seunghyun explains simply. "How selfish could I allow myself to be? Was it right for me to the soul from your parted lips and claim it as my own? To keep your life in my clasped hands and shield it away from you? How is any of that fair on you, taking your choice at a life away from you for my own selfish desires?"

"You foolish beast!" Jiyong cries out. There are flames all over his body, from his toes to his fingertips and soon it explodes and causes him to surge forward and slap his wolf right across the cheek. Once upon a time, the boy would have been terrified to lash out at the wolf of these forests and strike him with his weak human hands but now he knows better, now he knows no harm would ever befall him, especially not from his wolf. Those sharp claws and pointed teeth, they exist to protect him and keep him safe. "How stupid must you be to think you stole my choice away from me! Don't you see?! Ever since I was a child, when I first saw you, my choice was made. Of course I had no choice, I never had a choice. My soul has always ached for yours, Wolf. Mine is the other half to yours. My life belonged to you the moment we met. Why else would your existence feel so wasted without me? Why else would you try to carve out this heart of yours?" Jiyong slams his clenched fist right in the middle of Seunghyun's chest, where he knows the worst of his self-inflicted scars are concealed by his tattered shirt. "The only reason why the wolf inside you is desperate to rip out your heart is because it is only one half of what it should be. I hold on to that other half of your heart and if you continue to push me away, if you refuse to fight for me, then you will never get your heart back from me."

It all becomes too much for Jiyong and his legs can no longer stand the pressure on his heart. With a defeated sob, Jiyong sinks down to the icy ground and buries his face in his frozen hands. Completely exhausted from his outburst, his voice comes out so quiet that if it weren't for Seunghyun's enhanced hearing, he wouldn't be able to hear it at all. "If you had just stayed with me," Jiyong whimpers and peers up at Seunghyun through his tears, "if you had stayed beside me, your heart wouldn't have felt so empty. You could have taken my heart into your hands and I could have made you happy. We both live the same half existence, Wolf. It's not just you who is in constant pain."

Seunghyun leaves room for silence to settle over them, waiting to see if Jiyong needs more time to express himself but after the seconds tick by with Jiyong only staring up at him through tearful eyes and clenching his hands in his cape over his heart, he can't bear to be kept apart from him any longer. Using the slowest and most graceful movements he can muster, Seunghyun crouches down to the frozen, solid ground and crawls closer to his crying mate. The careful movements required to approach him in this state are not unlike those he would use approaching a small creature of prey, relying on the small furry animal's curiosity to lure them in closer towards him and his intriguing scent. Strange that it seems to work precisely the same on his lovely creature, the moment Seunghyun is within arms reach of Jiyong, he is leaping into his arms.

The moment his Red rushes to be back in his arms, Seunghyun can sense the wolf inside him pawing it's claws at his skin. A familiar prickle of nerve endings rises over every inch of his body, demanding all of his inner strength to calm the wolf down. His love has always tempted the wolf to come out and play but he's not yet strong enough to allow the wolf to take over, he can't place any trust in the wolf to remain in control. One thing he can trust though, is his determination to always place Jiyong's safety before anything else in this world—and his precious boy has always been able to put his inner wolf at ease with the simplest forms of affection. Given the time they have been apart, there is a slight hesitation Seunghyun's movements, cautiously testing how far he can allow his wolf to go. With Jiyong burying his face deep in the crook of Seunghyun's neck, Seunghyun releases the breath he was holding in to empty his lungs. When his lungs have pushed out every last ounce of air, they automatically expand themselves, refilling with the fresh scent of Jiyong's chestnut hair.

At the first taste of that sweet scent, Seunghyun can feel his mouth water and swallows thickly. Following the trail of sweetness, Seunghyun slowly drags his nose from the crown of Jiyong's head down to his temple. A soft keening whimper slips past his lips when Jiyong willingly leans back to allow him better access to take in his scent. With Jiyong's tear-stained face so close to his, Seunghyun cannot resist the temptation of those salty tears and with a shuddering breath, he draws back to capture Jiyong's gaze. There, in those impossibly warm brown eyes, Seunghyun finds all the acceptance and adoration Jiyong has always held for this wolf side to him. Feeling reassured that he can give in to his wolf-like tendencies, Seunghyun whines at the back of his throat before leaning in close to Jiyong's wet cheek. His warm tongue darts out to tentatively the corner of Jiyong's lip where a teardrop got lost on it's way down. With gentle to the apple of his cheeks, under his eyes, the top of his lip, Seunghyun cleans up Jiyong's tears, lapping them up on his tongue. When his task is complete, Seunghyun places a chaste kiss to Jiyong's lips, feeling his lips quirk up into a smile.

Even though it's a struggle to tear his eyes away from his Red, Seunghyun's gaze is drawn up to the darkening sky hanging above them. The hairs on the back of his neck prickle as another dark cloud moves across the sky and shadows over the moon, signalling that their time together is already being cut short and every moment he spends keeping Jiyong from his home and his parents, they tempt fates cruel hands closer towards them. If only he could stay by his side every moment of every day, perhaps one day but at least for now, his first duty is to keep Jiyong safe and out of harms way. With his small, trembling creature held safely in his arms, Seunghyun cradles him closer to his chest and rests his head on those soft locks of hair, breathing in his scent once more.

"My Little Red, I did not mean to turn away from you and I am eternally sorry if I made you feel alone in this life. I promise to explain the intention behind my actions to you tomorrow night but for now you must wait just one more day." Seunghyun feels a tiny puff of air against his neck as Jiyong sobs over the prospect of having to be away from his wolf once more. Pulling back slowly to wipe those big fat tears away from Jiyong's puffy cheeks, Seunghyun continues, "One more day. I swear to you I will be back. The night approaches and you must return home safe and sound before anyone discovers you missing."

The very same warm, gentle hands which Jiyong has dreamt of every night reach out to help him back to his feet, carefully brushing the fallen snow flakes from his shoulders before combing through his damp, knotted hair. How easy it would be to simply fall into these arms and never leave.

"My home, you know where it is?" He asks in a soft whisper. "Since you left I moved into the room attached to the back of the bakery. My parents still remain in our house which is detached from the building and separated by a small field of wheat. If you approach from the west side of town, through the edge of the forests you should have a clear path." Seunghyun listens intently to his instructions, brows furrowed in concentration and Jiyong can't resist from reaching out to his thumb over that strong brow. Almost immediately, Seunghyun's face softens and Jiyong continues giving his instructions, fussing over straightening Seunghyun's collar at the same time. "Be certain to come through the field and not directly from the road. Nobody should see you that way. And avoid getting to close to my parents house. My father is a light sleeper."

"Is he truly that protective over you?" Seunghyun thought he could try his luck at bringing a giggle out from Jiyong but the boy narrows his eyes at him, wiping that smirk right off his lips.

"This is important. You mustn't be seen. By anyone. I've just got you back, there's no way I'm prepared to lose you again so soon. Or ever, for that matter."

"I know, my darling," Seunghyun whispers, leaning in to nuzzle Jiyong's cheek. He slowly drags the tip of his nose across Jiyong's cheek and up to his hair. "Close your eyes, Red. Don't watch me walk away."

Jiyong complies and allows his eyes to fall shut, a small whimper slipping through his parted lips when he feels the warmth leave him once more.

A/N: Well. Here we are. Please, let us not dwell on the past and reflect on how long this took me *clasps hands together* all that matters is that I'm posting here and now, right? Please... be gentle with me <3 I'm not the most talented writer, this is less than perfect, there's bound to be a lot of mistakes and I'm sure someone else could have done this story so much more justice. But this story is my heart and soul.

This will be long. Really long. And will take me a lifetime to write it. But I thought it was time I should finally begin sharing their journey with you, Their story will be told through the seasons and this first one, The First Winter, will be broken down into three parts. Part two (which is written and for the most part complete) should be up in 1-2 weeks, depending on how much work I get done on part three. I am SO excited to share this with all of you c': and I hope you'll all enjoy the ride -- patiently ;p

((I ran out of time before work to look over this properly and edit it for the 24584395th time. So umm... I will be back. In a day or two. Because I can't handle the anxiety of logging back in after I post this ahaha. I apologise if it's terrible or riddled with mistakes! I know you guys will be suffering from feels after reading this so imagine the feels I go through when I write it!))