(image not mine, credit to rightful owner)

 

 

 

At my shy confession which I couldn’t say like a man.

You quietly stepped over to me and embraced me. I yearn for you… I want to go back.

 

 Rain fell heavily outside, but Changmin couldn't hear it over the sound of his headphones. He couldn't help being excited over Jaejoong's solo mini album. Although he acted as if he had no idea about it, he was quite up to date. He couldn't help but to think that some of the songs were specifically about him or maybe for him. Sometimes he felt angry about it all but sometimes he felt guilty and sad. Especially after hearing 'All Alone' and 'One Kiss'. It had been getting worse and worse for him as time went by. He wasn't sure of anything anymore. He was getting distant from Yunho and as he laid in his bed listening to his Jaejoong hyung's beautiful voice he realized he felt all alone.

 

I couldn’t think, for even one moment,

that there would be a time when I would be without you.

But as time flows, it will be as if nothing happened and we wont be able to recollect.

 

By hanging out with friends like Kyuhyun and others, Changmin thought he could get his mind off things. But each time Kyuhyun touched him he was reminded of his touchy Jaejoong hyung who was always trying to be affectionate with him. He wondered if he was still touchy? He figured he probably was and Yoochun and Junsu had now fallen to be his victims of random cuddles. But at least they would actually cuddle back. They won't push him away and act as if they don't want to be near him. 

 

"You alright Changmin?" Kyuhyun rubbed his back. 

"Yeah" Changmin grumbled wishing he could tell everyone not to touch him. 

 

Even when Yunho touched him just for photo shoots or filming he'd find himself quite angry. But he never said anything… In fact he would go with it anytime someone touched him now he'd just be touchy back.  But in reality …. he hated to admit that alone at night he'd sometimes cry out of that anger. That he just wanted to feel Jaejoong's touch. Hear him laugh as he would just hold onto him tighter every time Changmin just tried pulling away. He just wanted to be held by Jaejoong and have him speak soothingly to him. 

 

"Why is my baby crying?" Jaejoong would ask and wipe his tears away with his thumbs before placing a soft kiss on Changmin's nose. 

 

He wanted to be Jaejoong's baby again. Changmin just wanted to be taken care of again. He needed that. But no one was here to baby him now he was a grown man who must act like an adult, move on and take care of himself. But more than anything he just wanted to whine and kick and throw a tantrum until Jaejoong would come and calm him down. Just like his mother would when he was a young child. 

 

I believed in eternity, I can’t easily forget about you who made up my life.

 

"Yah Changmin, want me to make you something? Or we can go out to eat! Your favorite is on my computer right now want to see?" these were the kind of things Jaejoong would say to an angry or upset Changmin. Or he'd just cuddle him and tickle him till Changmin had no choice but submit to his hyung. Later he would even submit to his kisses.

 

Tears trailed down Changmin's cheeks as he pressed replay on Jaejoong's album. 

 

Like a fool I took your love for granted
Because I got used to it
I only have heartful of apologies

 

He got up yanking the headphones out and quickly put on the first outfit he could find. He then grabbed his car keys and left, ignoring the pouring rain and that he was now drenched, he got into his car and left. 

 

Changmin could not take it anymore. He needed to see him, to feel him more than anything…. But when he arrived at the unfamiliar house he stayed in his car for about an hour. It was two in the morning now. He thought maybe he made a mistake coming here. 

 

"I want to run to you my love" started playing in his mind and he got out of his car quickly walking toward the door. He rang the doorbell obnoxiously like he always used to before. He chuckled to himself. But then he thought what if he was asleep? He felt bad for possibly waking Jaejoong but if his hyung was still the same, he knew Jae was not asleep yet. 

 

 Changmin stood up straight and coughed ready to put his usual manly act that he is now accustomed to as he heard the door unlocking. As predicted a wide awake looking Jaejoong opened the door his eyes wide in shock. He looked much too thin and pale for Changmin's liking. 

 

"C-Changmin?" Jaejoong stuttered. 

 

Even after a long time

Your familiar face still is dearly precious to me

 

At the sight and sound of Jaejoong, Changmin broke apart in an instant. 

 

"H-hyung." his baby voice came out, his face scrunched up slightly as tears threatened to stream his face. 

 

Seeing as how drenched and wet the younger man was, Jaejoong quickly pulled the him into his home, closing and locking the door. He looked him over as if inspecting him like a mother would her son to see if he was hurt. 

 

"H-hyung" Changmin repeated before finally breaking out in tears. Causing Jaejoong to wrap his arms tightly around him. 

 

"Are you okay? What's wrong Minnie?" Jaejoong caressed his cheek gently and ran his fingers through his hair. "Aish you've gotten so huge Changmin" he chuckled softly. 

 

"I just…" Changmin cried harder burying his face into Jaejoong's neck, inhaling his sweet scent and held onto him as if for dear life. 

 

"Changmin" Jaejoong spoke sweetly as he caressed the tall boys hair and gently led him to the couch. He rubbed Changmin's back and spoke sweetly to him saying things like:

 

"I missed you so much Changmin"

 

"I'm so happy to see you."

 

"I'm glad you've been eating well."

 

"Thank you for finally coming."

 

Changmin just kept crying into the older man's shoulder until he heard the words he'd been longing to hear.

 

"I love you Changminah. Always will no matter what." 

 

Did you not hate me

For I was not even able to say a word like “Thank You”

Because I was shy

 

He slowly stopped crying but still kept his face nuzzled into Jaejoong's neck as he tried to focus on how nice Jae's hand felt rubbing circles into his back. He smiled softly when his hyung placed a soft kiss on his head. 

 

Changmin finally looked up to look at the beautiful face of his hyung and was greeted by a warm smile but was shocked to see tears streaming down Jaejoong's face. 

 

Jaejoong broke into a sob and turned his face away trying to hide it with his arm. 

 

"I'm so sorry Changmin. I'm so sorry.. I didn't mean to leave you.. I.."

 

Changmin frowned his heart aching at the sight. He pulled Jaejoong onto his lap and hugged him tightly. 

 

"It's okay hyung, you did what you had to and I'm really proud of you, Junsu and Yoochun." Changmin said softly now taking his turn to comfort Jaejoong. He messed his hair a little roughly. 

 

"Changmin.." Jaejoong whined as his head got smothered by the larger man. Changmin chuckled and tilted others chin up and pecked his lips. Jaejoong stared at him in shock but then smiled widely. This was definitely not how he imagined it would be meeting his hyung again. He always pictured it would be with Yunho and they would probably be distant and cold to each other. But he was glad that wasn't the case. It felt just like old times. 

 

"Aish Changmin" Jaejoong ruffled his hair and tried hugging the boys head. 

 

"Yah hyung!" 

 

"So tell me" Jaejoong released him and fixed Changmin's hair. "What brings you here around this time of the night." he laughed. "I thought you were hurt or something… you scared me!" he pouts.

 

Changmin looked down shyly tears welling up again. 

 

"Aigoo okay I'm sorry you don't have to say anything then" Jaejoong was quick to wipe the tears and hug him again. 

 

"No, it's just I really missed you hyung." Changmin sighed and nuzzled his nose against the side of Jaejoong's face. 

 

"I missed you too Changmin" Jaejoong kissed the boys forehead. 

 

"I missed your touch as crazy as that sounds." Changmin grinned.

 

"Yeah, it is a bit odd that you are letting me smother you" Jaejoong laughed. "I was kind of scared at first but I like it. I was starting to get jealous you know?"

 

"Jealous, why?"

 

"Because after I left you suddenly got shipped with everyone, became touchy and KyuMin couple has been getting so popular."

 

"Hyung…" Changmin grabbed Jaejoong's face and looked him straight in the eyes. "I can't believe I'm admitting this but I only did all that because I missed your touch. I g-guess it was my way of trying to say that I wanted you to…. touch me."

 

Jaejoong burst out laughing. "That says the complete opposite Changmin, but that is very cute and nice to hear."

 

Changmin pouted earning him a sweet kiss. Grinning he pulled Jaejoong closer into him and kissed him deeply shoving his tongue into his mouth. His hand reaching down to Jaejoong's .

 

"YAH SHIM CHANGMIN" Jaejoong laughed as he pulled away. "You're still the biggest ert ever." he pinched the younger ones nose. 

 

"H-hyung ouch" Changmin rubbed his nose. "I just missed you!" he whined while making a cute puppy face. 

 

Jaejoong smiled and wrapped his arms tightly around Changmin's neck and took his turn to kiss him deeply. 

 

After, both were out of breath they pulled away and chuckled. 

 

"Hyung… can I spend the night." Changmin gave him that sweet smile.

 

"Of course baby. Anytime." Jaejoong smiled kissing Changmin's forehead.

 

"And can you cook for me? I'm hungry!"

 

"Aish Shim Changmin…" 

 

Changmin grinned happily and nuzzled into Jaejoong, hugging him tightly. 

 

 

Love U baby I love U
Thank U thank U
Love U baby I love U
Thank U thank U

Baby I swear forever