“Have you ever-”

Junhong’s lips pull into a thin line. His hand absentmindedly running along Daehyun’s back, up and down in a soothing motion. His fingertips feel like they burn. The older boy sits on the balcony railing, dangerously close to the edge. Junhong tries not to think too much about that.

Daehyun glances at him through the corner of his eyes, silently questioning. Junhong deliberately doesn’t meet his eyes, keeping his own gaze upward toward the night sky.

“Have you ever wanted to go back?”  

There’s no stars in the sky, especially not here in Seoul where the light pollution is too high. Junhong feels like it’s too silent. Even though there’s the sound of traffic and night life below them, the whistling of the wind through the skyrises, and the muted noise of the television playing back inside. The breeze, welcome at first when they had both come out onto the balcony, now carries a sharp chill.

Daehyun hums. Junhong stops rubbing his back and drops his hand. Daehyun keeps his gaze on the sky, but reaches for Junhong’s hand. He holds it, gentle, and maneuvers so that their fingers lace together.

In his lap, he plays with Junhong’s long fingers. It’s another moment before Daehyun hums again. His hands are now motionless, but he’s still holding Junhong’s hand in a steady grip.

“Not particularly.” He laughs, empty, the smile not reaching his eyes. “It’s not like I can return anyways.”

Junhong looks at him then. Daehyun looks tired. His plush lips are pulled in a straight line, eye bags a bit more prominent, and shoulders hunched in. He’s swimming in Junhong’s sweater.

Junhong glances at Daehyun’s back. Where the two large scars, long since healed, run on his upper back between his shoulder blades.

Proof of his descent from Heaven.

His chest constricts.

“But,” Junhong knows he shouldn’t prod like this. “But, do you want to.” His voice is barely above a whisper, carrying the weight of his own insecurities.

Daehyun’s head drops and he curls in on himself, hunched over so his elbows rest on his knees. He brings his hands up, clasped along with Junhong’s and speaks, warm breath hitting Junhong’s knuckles.

“Sometimes.” His voice is low, almost inaudible with the noises around them.

He looks at Junhong then, eyes dark and glistening with the lights of the city. Junhong feels breathless in front of Daehyun. He continues, voice raw with emotion, “I miss them sometimes.”

Junhong knows who he’s referring to, has heard many joyous tales and stories. Of Youngjae. Of Jongup. Of Himchan. Junhong’s eyes stare down at the street below. He feels inadequate, all Daehyun has on earth is the company of himself and maybe Yongguk.

Daehyun must recognize the look on his face and that makes him feel even more useless. He doesn’t have much to offer Daehyun. What is his music education degree and run down apartment going to do to help make this angel happy.

“Junhong,” Daehyun’s voice is like honey, sweet and soothing. Junhong glances up and Daehyun cups his cheeks. “I enjoy it here with you. You’re the sweetest boy I’ve ever met.” Daehyun’s eyes are sparkling and he’s smiling that smile that makes Junhong feel like his heart is melting.

Daehyun maneuvers off of the railing and stands on the balcony. He grabs Junhong’s head and pulls it down to knock their foreheads together. Junhong naturally wraps his arms around Daehyun’s waist. He’s glad Daehyun’s down from the railing.

Daehyun’s voice is low, “Sometimes I miss my friends just like how you get homesick for your family. But that doesn’t mean I wish to return. There’s a reason why I’m not up there anymore.” He laughs, light and breathy. Daehyun loops his arms around Junhong’s shoulders and buries his face into his neck, pressing a kiss there. The night chill doesn’t bother Junhong anymore.

Daehyun starts speaking again, voice muffled. “You’ve been a true blessing to me Choi Junhong. I wouldn’t want to be spending my days with anyone else.” He leans up and kisses Junhong short and sweet. There’s a dark flush on his cheeks and Junhong is endeared. Will forever be endeared by this angel of his.

He tightens his arms around Daehyun’s torso. He knows sometimes Daehyun gets a distant look in his eyes especially when he thinks he’s alone. But never has that look been directed at him. Junhong looks at him now and Daehyun looks at him with such warmth and love, he feels foolish for his own insecurities.

He surges forward and presses kisses all over Daehyun’s face, whispering words of love in between. He kisses him until the boy in his arms is giggling and squirming. Both of their worries forgotten.

Back inside, the envelope, white with only the letters Jung Daehyun written in gold, lays on the coffee table unopened.

A/N 

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