Sunhwa planted her feet on the ground as the swing fell parallel. Thoughts of Changmin filled her mind, maybe he was just kidding when he asked that or maybe he was serious. She ruffled her hair and groaned. There really is that longing in her that wanted to be with Changmin again.  But she also thought it was a bad idea because she knew deep in her heart that she’d end up hurting him again and she didn’t want it to happen. Not again.

She heaved a long sigh then placed her hand on her side. She patted again. She looked around. “I left my bag in the hospital room!” she shrieked. She then stood up and went back to the hospital. She slowly opened the door to the room and saw that Changmin was sleeping. She quietly crept inside and to the window side where she left the bag.

“You could’ve just said no rather than leaving you know”

Sunhwa jumped at the sound of Changmin’s voice. His eyes were lightly shined upon by the orange light of the setting sun seeping through the window.

“It’s getting late, you better get home” Changmin spoke. His voice was monotonous and bitter, not wanting any response, but Sunhwa still wanted to make things clear.

“You don’t understand,” she spoke softly. Changmin elevated his bed so he could see her better, “I have all the time for you to make me.”

The girl looked away as she spoke, “I want to keep skating”.

“And you don’t think you can still do that even if we were together?” Changmin kept his composure but he wanted to laugh, not because it was funny but because it was ticking him off. “You think I’ll hold you back? Ah so that’s how it is?” he continued. Sunhwa bowed. Changmin really knew her well.

“Fine. I’m sorry… if you think I really put you down then go. Just go” Changmin tried to calm down and not raise his voice but he ended up sounding even colder than in the beginning.

Sunhwa walked out with heavy steps and tears threatening to fall. She couldn’t understan herself either.

A few days later, Changmin was able to check out of the hospital but he still had to be supported by crutches. Sunhwa would run into him at school and he’d just give her the same smile he gave the other girls at school. He didn’t treat her as sweetly as he did earlier, but like everyone else. It hurt Sunhwa that he kept a distance. Back then he’d go out of his way to talk to her but now, he’d just nod at her. This was her doing, though. Maybe she should’ve said something else as to why she didn’t want to date him.

“He’s a jerk…” Inna mumbled after taking a spoonful of ice cream, “guys who use the ‘friendzone’ are jerks. They’re just after you for your body. You don’t need a boy like that Sunhwa-sshi!”

Sunhwa chuckled at her friend’s reaction. It’s the first time anyone took her pain personally like that, she could really tell that Inna meant well. “Yeah but I said something mean too. We’re both at fault…” she reasoned. Inna stopped eating then pointed the spoon at Sunhwa, “I don’t know what you two had in the past, I wish you’d tell me, but if you shouldn’t agree on everything he says when it’s against your wishes. He might be a jerk, but Changmin-sunbaenim takes rejection quite well” she said. Sunhwa raised an eyebrow, “did you date him?” The girl who was eating suddenly turned beet red and stuffed with ice cream. “You did? Then why are you supporting me like this?” Sunhwa held the girl’s hands down on the table.

Inna gulped the contents in then let out a dejected sigh. She explained that she and Changmin didn’t date but they were rumored to be a couple since he’d help her out with being on ice when she was new. He’d treat her well that the other girls in her class got jealous and bullied her. 

“But sunbaenim protected me. He’d take care of me and made sure nobody hurt me. I told him to stop that because people misunderstand. I yelled at him and said that I didn’t want to be his girlfriend so he could stop treating me nicely already… but instead of getting mad, he told me about the girl he loved who apparently loved ice skating more than him. That I reminded him of her…” Inna smiled at the memory as she looked up at Sunhwa who was tearing up. “Are you okay?” she asked. Sunhwa wiped her eyes and nodded. She made a mistake thinking that Changmin would hold her back. He knew she’d put figure skating before him but he still took the chance to ask her if they could try again.