Oh Sehun was his name.

Oh Sehun with the bleached blond hair, dark chocolate eyes and a beautiful smile. Byun Baekhyun could never forget Oh Sehun and it wasn’t just because of his defined jawline, not too thin yet not too thick lips and perfectly sculpted cheekbones. It was also because of Sehun’s long warm arms that wrap around Baekhyun and made him feel like home. It was also the way Sehun’s voice could do wonders to Baekhyun’s heart, his kisses lifted up the whole of Baekhyun’s being. It was because of the way Sehun never forgets to tell Baekhyun how much he is loved, the way Sehun looks at him as if he was a miracle, the way Sehun made him smile.

It was because Oh Sehun was his first love and his last.

There are many things that Baekhyun wants to remember, like how his first kiss had been with Sehun; at sixteen and on the rooftop of Sehun’s house. He does remember it, in perfect detail to be precise. Baekhyun remembers the racing of his heartbeat the moment Sehun leaned down, almost towering over Baekhyun at that age. He had eyed Baekhyun’s lips at that moment, had been for quite a while, and when Sehun closed his eyes, Baekhyun’s natural instinct was to do the same, and so he did. He couldn’t say he knew exactly what was happening. He did expect something that could cause his stomach to flip, his heartbeat to stop and his fingers to begin trembling slightly. He just didn’t expect to feel it so soon. And when he felt Sehun’s lips on his, all he could do after the above side effects was moving his own lips. He kissed back.  

He didn’t regret it. The emotions that played inside him when they shared their first kiss was something Baekhyun could recall as easily as if it had only happened yesterday. It was the start of something beautiful, of memories after memories of laughter and love and holding each other close. They were both young and people might say that their futures were still clouded, that they might not be in each other’s lives in the next ten years, that they won’t last, but all Sehun and Baekhyun believed then was that they would and they could. They were meant to be.

“You finally said yes to YiXing, seriously. The world is in peace.” Kyungsoo flopped down onto the space next to Baekhyun, placing his tray of lunch on the table.

It was finally senior year for Baekhyun and his two best friends, Kyungsoo and Jongdae, and Baekhyun was actually pretty happy for YiXing, who had tried for the last three and a half years to get Jongdae to say yes. He knew just how torturous it was to please Jongdae, and the fact that YiXing managed to at all was very impressive. YiXing was kind of sort of perfect for someone like Jongdae and it’s not for the lack of figuring out the Chinese male first before Baekhyun and Kyungsoo approved. They both learnt that YiXing, although a little slow, was sweet and warm-hearted, a romantic at heart. An ideal type Jongdae never thought he had.

Normally, Baekhyun would take a longer time to approve of the people who were to get close to his best friends, but because YiXing was kind of Sehun’s best friend, Sehun managed to pull a very adorable aegyo that Baekhyun couldn’t resist. So yes, he accepted YiXing quite easily partly because his boyfriend does the worst aegyos that he couldn’t help but fall for. Sehun could be infuriating at times like that but Baekhyun just couldn’t say no to Sehun. Sehun of the cute pout and cute eye smile and everything that has to do with adorable. It was both an advantage and a disadvantage to Baekhyun. But he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Kyungsoo’s boyfriend didn’t need much approval from Baekhyun. JoonMyeon was the top student in every subject, class president and also the president of the student committee. It was no question that JoonMyeon would grow older with a promising future. He plans to take up law studies and become a lawyer. Baekhyun could imagine Kyungsoo in the next six years, hand hooked over JoonMyeon’s arm as they both attend his wedding – yes, Baekhyun dreams big and he actually has the initiative to make them reality – with Sehun. He remembered telling Kyungsoo of this particular imagination; Kyungsoo’s first reaction had been to laugh at Baekhyun for even thinking that far. Are you sure you’re going to marry Sehun?

Of course Baekhyun was sure. The bickering had led to a quarrel, in which they didn’t acknowledge each other for almost two weeks. It ended the moment Jongdae screamed at both their faces to ing grow up. They only blinked because Jongdae had never looked so pissed off. Ever since, Jongdae had been a little more talkative, the one leading their conversations.

Oh, to go back to the point, JoonMyeon was also Sehun’s distant cousin. They didn’t really get along but if JoonMyeon was at the lunch table, Baekhyun could find Sehun seated just next to the oldest, with YiXing on his other side. It was that trio and Baekhyun’s own trio. And it had been that way since high school started for the six of them. Being born in March, they considered JoonMyeon the oldest and Sehun the youngest, since his birthday is in October. JoonMyeon likes it when they used formalities but Sehun being Sehun couldn’t be bothered to call any of them hyung; his explanation to Baekhyun being that they were all of the same age anyway. It was a fair enough reason, and besides, Baekhyun wouldn’t want Sehun calling him hyung. He wasn’t that much older and Sehun calling him his special nickname was much more endearing.

“Bacon, you here, baby?” Baekhyun blinked from his train of thoughts, his vision bringing him back to the present and he found himself staring into the dark brown eyes of none other than his boyfriend, Oh Sehun. He flushes a deep scarlet, never getting used to the intense gaze that Sehun tends to give him, with eyes so full of love and admiration.

Kyungsoo snickered from somewhere beside him and Jongdae, who sat beside Sehun and opposite Kyungsoo, busied himself with his phone. Baekhyun managed to completely ignore the big-eyed friend of his, keeping his smile directed at Sehun alone. “Hey,”

Sehun smiled, reaching down to clasp Baekhyun’s hand in his larger one. “I was thinking of a party at my place after graduation. What do you think?”

The pout that formed on Baekhyun’s lips came naturally as he looked down on their clasped hands and began playing with Sehun’s fingers. “With lots of people? As in I won’t get alone time with you to celebrate graduation?”

“Baek, you’re sometimes adorably disgusting, I swear. You get plenty of alone time with Sehun after that, dickhead.” Kyungsoo in, earning himself a glare from Baekhyun.

Sehun only chuckled and brought Baekhyun’s hand up to his lips, kissing his knuckles, eyes never leaving Baekhyun’s equally brown ones. “We’ll get lots of alone time after we get out of high school and you move in with me, bacon.”

Somewhere at the corner Kyungsoo and Jongdae made gagging noises but Baekhyun ignored it because the heat that spread across his cheeks were far greater than the annoyance that built up in his throat towards his two supposedly best friends. For one, Sehun just invited him to move in to the apartment he knew the Oh parents had gotten Sehun for his seventeenth birthday, for when he graduates from high school and gets into college. He had been there with Sehun, along with Kyungsoo, Jongdae, YiXing and JoonMyeon decorating Sehun’s soon-to-be new home. It had turned out simple and comfortable, mostly because Baekhyun had been the one directing them all. It might have seemed a little rush for Baekhyun to think so far ahead, and he would deny it if someone asks, but he did thought of their future together. To him it was no doubt that the apartment would be his as well as soon as Sehun invites him in. And his dream just came true.

Now, Baekhyun bit his bottom lip as he pretended to think about it. But he couldn’t help the grin that stretched at his lips as he nodded. He could already picture the nights they would spend in each other’s arms, days wasted on good memories as they play in the kitchen. The future, at the moment, was not as cloudy as people would have guessed. It was bright and clear. “We’ll be in the same college and you’ll be my roommate, right? In a house only the both of us share?”

The taller boy grinned, in that lazy slash sleepy way of his, as he nodded at Baekhyun’s sort of questions, squeezing Baekhyun’s hand a little tighter; a promise only they both understood. They shared another grin just as both JoonMyeon and YiXing came to join them and soon the three pairs fell into enthusiastic planning for the party at Sehun’s place. Graduation won’t be too far away, and Baekhyun was more excited than he should be.

It started when Sehun accidentally left a crack in the seemingly perfect relationship they were sharing. While before the glass was flawless, shining bright and reflecting everything around it, there is now a big, ugly scratch. Baekhyun tries, many times, to clean it off, to gloss the once perfect surface but it was to no avail. It was only one lie from Sehun, but the cut was deep enough to leave a scar. Sure he hadn’t minded it too much the first time, but once becomes twice and twice turned into three times. Sehun kept repeating what he said he wouldn’t do. Sehun does what he promised he would stop doing. Sehun just doesn’t care anymore. And it hurt like a .

He had moved into Sehun’s apartment even before the exams were over. His parents hadn’t minded him moving, and so he did happily and settled quickly in the new home he had imagined to be his for more years to come. Sehun was all that he had expected him to be; holding him when he’s cold at night, kissing him like there was no tomorrow, whispering words of love into his ear as if he wouldn’t be able to say it again the next day. Sehun made Baekhyun float high above the clouds even after he’d fallen so long ago. Sehun was everything he could ever wish for.

Baekhyun first found out that Sehun was dealing with a drug dealer the night of their graduation party at Sehun’s place. Of course it had been secretive; unanswered questions lingering and avoiding eye contact. Baekhyun wanted to believe that his seemingly perfect boyfriend didn’t have anything to hide from him, but curiosity got the best of Baekhyun. The crowd of graduating students and non-graduating students were still partying hard to the loud music on the first floor when Baekhyun decided to follow his boyfriend up to what he knows would be Sehun’s bedroom, after seeing that the blonde was leading another man up the stairs to the second floor.

It didn’t help that the man – clad in black jacket to top his white tank underneath and dark jeans hugging his legs – looked like he came right out of a movie, dyed red hair spiked up on top of his head and he loomed even taller than Sehun. Baekhyun’s first thought was that the man looked undeniably attractive, until he realized that he could be attractive enough to get Sehun’s attention, to which led him tiptoeing and following the two tall males upstairs. Maybe Sehun cheating on him with a stranger would be a much tolerable heartbreak for him to face. He was strong, Baekhyun knows, and he would really just throw a punch in Sehun’s face for two-timing him and walk out like nothing happen – well, maybe not really. Maybe he’d run out crying because only Kyungsoo and Jongdae know how whipped he had become – but what he overheard was even harder. His heart wasn’t broken, and he couldn’t walk out like he imagined because God, he never wanted to leave Sehun, especially now that he knows what Sehun was dealing with.

He never pecked his boyfriend to be doing drugs. Sehun was always high class, sophisticated and walked with a straight back and an ego and pride higher than the Oh’s mansion. Surely he would’ve noticed if Sehun had been taking that illegal stuff. It seemed though, at the time, that the red-haired man knew what was on his mind because then he chuckled and gave Sehun a bow, thanking him for the supplies. The red-haired must be a dealer, and Baekhyun wasn’t too stupid to figure out that Sehun’s role was even higher than of the man’s.

He wished he had walked out the moment Sehun caught his eyes that night, struck silent as the red-haired man walked past Baekhyun. He wished he hadn’t trusted the words that Sehun threw at him; pleading him to give another chance and that he would stop. He should’ve known that Sehun would never stop. Supplying and selling was almost as addictive as taking drugs itself, or maybe even worse. How could he have fallen for the arms that wrapped around him, asking him to forgive and for a chance? He didn’t know. He only knew then that he needed Sehun, enough to trust him, enough to keep him, enough to give him another chance.

There was ever only Sehun is his heart; Sehun runs through his veins and throughout every inch of him. What would he be if he lets go? How would he move on knowing he had left the boy he loved so much to lose himself in something so dangerous? Besides the obvious fact that he could never fall out of love with Sehun, Baekhyun also wanted to help. He was determined to pull Sehun out of the mess he’d gotten himself into. He didn’t know Sehun didn’t want his help.

The real breakdown did not really happen the night of that party, however, because Baekhyun had been sure that he could trust Sehun with what he promised. He did his best to make sure Sehun did stop, keeping his eye and focus solely on Sehun. It helped that they were accepted to the same college, in the same major. Baekhyun found that he could handle it because Sehun had only proved to him that he was keeping his promise well. He no longer avoids Baekhyun’s eyes and was always beside Baekhyun. He was happy to know that Sehun cares enough to keep his promise. If only he’d known that it wouldn’t have lasted too long.

The real, most heartbreaking moment was when Sehun looked Baekhyun in the eyes and lied, for the fourth time that month. Baekhyun had let it go the first time when Sehun said he was only going out to meet Jongin, his friend. It was because Baekhyun had almost forgotten that he really shouldn’t trust Sehun and that he actually does trust the blond that he didn’t follow. The first lie Sehun slipped through unnoticed, and so was the second. The third, however, was of him saying he was meeting up with Mrs. Oh, when in truth he was receiving the bags of cash from that red-haired man Baekhyun saw at the graduation party, and passing another bag full of God knows what to that man. It didn’t help, or it did, that Baekhyun had seen this with his own eyes.

Sehun smiled and told him his mother was doing great when Baekhyun asked, facing each other on the dining table. Sehun didn’t look at him in the eyes, focusing instead on the food on his plate. Baekhyun remembered the slight crack of his heart, knowing that Sehun was lying. The feeling wasn’t pleasant and Baekhyun didn’t know what he should do. His head tells him to voice it out, to let Sehun know that he’d been caught but his heart told him to let this go just one more time. And like always, Baekhyun listens to his heart, despite knowing that he really shouldn’t. His heart speaks more logically because all it could feel was the love he has for Sehun.

He caught Sehun again the fourth time. The lie had been that Sehun was supposedly to meet his father for a ‘very important discussion’, something about the Oh’s family business and whatnot. Baekhyun found that he believed what Sehun was saying until, of course, Kyungsoo and Jongdae came over and told him that they saw Sehun with a rather attractive redhaired and he couldn’t help but to spill it all out to his two best friends. He honestly didn’t know what to do; he was only grateful that both Kyungsoo and Jongdae were such good friends and managed to help him.

The only option is to confront Sehun, Jongdae had suggested. Kyungsoo had been and looked angrier than Baekhyun had felt and both Jongdae and himself thought best that Kyungsoo be brought out of the apartment before Sehun gets home and gets a night’s worth lecture and maybe a black eye. Jongdae managed to drag Kyungsoo out just in time as Sehun came home. They both gave him the cold shoulder when he greeted them, but Baekhyun couldn’t blame his friends. Baekhyun watched as Sehun looked at the two older males with a confused expression as he remained seated in his position on the couch, arms crossed. He wasn’t happy.

Sehun smiles at him and when he was close enough he actually had the audacity to lean down and kiss the corner of Baekhyun’s mouth. He’d flinched in an attempt to pull away but Baekhyun found that he actually craved the sensation of Sehun’s lips on his. He managed, however, to hold himself back, keeping his face stoic. Sehun soon realized that Baekhyun wasn’t happy and he abandoned his phone on the table before taking a seat next to Baekhyun, facing the smaller male and ready to talk it out. Baekhyun could only wish Sehun wouldn’t lie, but even if he didn’t, Baekhyun didn’t know if he should hold on or let go.

“Where did you go?” Came Baekhyun’s question and he refused to look at Sehun as the blond hesitated.

“I told you I went to meet my dad.”

Lies. Lies were all Baekhyun could see in Sehun’s chocolate eyes when he looked into them. He wished he could ignore the breaking of his heart because he didn’t want this to affect him too badly. Sehun wasn’t cheating, Sehun still loved him but deep down he knew that the trust between them had been destroyed. He could no longer believe any word that might spill from Sehun’s lips. Sure, it seemed a little childish that he was not trusting Sehun because of this, but Sehun promised. He promised he wouldn’t do it and he lied again and again. Who knows what else he might be lying about? Suddenly Baekhyun wasn’t sure if Sehun even loved him.

“ you for lying to me, Sehun. I ing trusted you and you just lied to my face.” Baekhyun snapped, getting up from the couch to look down on Sehun, finally and for the first time looming over the taller boy and he felt in control because Sehun knows he was right.

Sehun didn’t get up to level with Baekhyun; instead he let his eyes fall onto the seat where Baekhyun was seated a few seconds ago, like a child would the floor when his mother reprimands him. Baekhyun tries not to think of that comparison, knowing fully well how he might have a change of heart if he falls for Sehun’s charms. He couldn’t let it happen. Better to save his heart before Sehun gets the chance to shatter it to pieces. Sehun cracked it after he promised to look after it. Sehun couldn’t keep his word. Sehun lies. And it hurt Baekhyun more than he’d thought it will. Wasn’t he enough for Sehun to change? Could he worth less than what Sehun was dealing with? It seemed and felt that the money Sehun was earning for doing illegal stuff was much more important than their relationship, because if it wasn’t then Sehun would have stopped completely. But Sehun continued. Sehun doesn’t really care.

And God, it hurts. He could almost see the future he’d created in his head of them together slip away. Sehun destroyed it all, and for the first time in his life, Baekhyun’s dreams shattered.

Baekhyun didn’t cry, however, because anger rose higher than the pain in his chest. “You know what? Look for me only when you realize I’m worth more to you than the money you’re making, Sehun. And I don’t want to see you until then. Don’t come to me, don’t look for me, not until you remember that I’ve been here helping you and you just continued what you said you would stop. Not until you’re sure that you love me as much as I love you.”

The most painful part of this moment was that Sehun didn’t respond to what Baekhyun had said. He kept his eyes on the couch, shoulders hunched. Baekhyun couldn’t stay another second for fear that the tears he managed to withhold might betray him and spill, so he headed to their shared room in quick strides of his legs to pack his bag, taking whatever that is important. He managed, surprisingly, to keep the tears that pooled at his eyes. For a moment, he praised himself. Sehun never made him cry before and he didn’t want that to change.

If you ask what the most hurtful part of this breakup was, Baekhyun would gladly name it and it was that Sehun didn’t stop him when he shouldered his backpack and headed out of the house. The last time he turned to look over his shoulder, his ex-boyfriend was still seated on the damn couch, face in his hands. Baekhyun wished Sehun could only feel pain at that moment because he was too angry. His feet were heavy to move and the bag on his shoulder was even heavier, but nothing compares to the weight in his chest. If he could, he would turn back and drop himself next to Sehun so the taller boy could hold him as he sleeps. But he finds that he no longer trusts the blonde, no matter how much he wanted to. Sehun lied too many times.

He wondered that night as he snuggled close to Kyungsoo in Jongdae’s apartment if he was being immature, getting upset over little white lies. He lay awake staring up at the ceiling remembering the look on Sehun’s face when he promised he wouldn’t repeat what he’d done. Was it unreasonable for Baekhyun to abandon Sehun like that just because Sehun was making money? Sehun was earning it the wrong way, however, and all he’d ever wanted was for Sehun to live his life free and out of trouble, with him. If he lets Sehun continue, he knew he was only giving the authorities reasons to capture his lover and he didn’t want to have to spend half his life happily with Sehun and another half spent visiting Sehun in jail. He could accept Sehun as who he is, and it wasn’t that Sehun being in jail that really bothers him, but it was that of trust and promises broken. It was because Sehun valued his job more than Baekhyun.

Baekhyun’s second major disappointment was when he opened the door to Jongdae’s apartment the next day after the bell rang, and didn’t see Sehun at the doorway.

“But Minseok’s a really, really good looking guy, Baek. You should give him a chance.” Kyungsoo was saying as his eyes focused on the screen of his phone, and it really irritates Baekhyun to see that the attention wasn’t on him when he was actually the topic of the conversation. He rolled his eyes and pretended not to hear what Kyungsoo just said to him.

They stayed in silence for about two minutes when Kyungsoo realized he was being ignored. He looked up from his phone and at Baekhyun, who busied himself reading an article from the newspaper he actually didn’t give a damn about. Business and whatnot; it wasn’t his style. He ignored the look Kyungsoo was giving him, resisting to look back at the owl. Kyungsoo sighed and snatched the newspaper from Baekhyun’s grasp. “I’m talking to you.”

Baekhyun glared at his friend. “I’m aware. And while I do admit that Minseok is good looking, he’s not my style.”

“Not your style bull. He’s just like Sehun, only less of an .” Kyungsoo mumbled, somehow hoping that Baekhyun hadn’t heard him. It wasn’t his lucky day.

Baekhyun’s only reaction to the mention of Sehun’s name was to blink, his heart suddenly racing against his chest despite the emptiness that fills it. It had been almost a year since his breakup with Sehun and he hadn’t seen or heard from his ex-lover ever since. YiXing never mentioned him and whenever JoonMyeon is around, he’s too busy staring at Kyungsoo. Baekhyun swallowed the sudden lump in his throat, fidgeting in his seat. He wanted to strangle Kyungsoo for even bringing him back to such a terrible memory; he was doing just fine trying to move on. His attempts, though, were half-hearted because in all honesty, he still loves Sehun. He still held on to the hope that Sehun might someday appear and tell him that he’s finally realized he loves Baekhyun as much as Baekhyun loves him. He’s waited for nine whole months. There was no sign of Sehun ever turning up, but he decided he should wait just a little longer.

“Baekhyun, the guy really likes you,” Kyungsoo said in exasperation. “Get over Sehun and move on. Minseok’s a law student, like JoonMyeon! Imagine a day in the future where we reunite at a party and our lawyer husbands laugh and praise us over wine. Can you see it, Baek?!”

With an eye-roll, Baekhyun shook his head. “No, I can’t, Kyungie. Look who’s thinking so far ahead now? I don’t like Minseok that way, I won’t marry him.”

“Come on, of course you will. Try to imagine it! It’ll be so lovely. Can’t you see it, bacon?”

The anger and frustration that built up in Baekhyun’s throat and out of Baekhyun’s mouth was a surprise to the both of them. “No! Okay?! No, I can’t. Not if you’re still calling me bacon like Sehun did, not if you keep on asking me to move on when you’re one of the two people who knows that I’m still in love with Sehun, not when all I see is Sehun in my dreams and you know that. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

ing tears, Baekhyun cursed himself as the tears spill from his eyes, his hands going up to wipe them away hastily. He’d never cried before when it comes to Sehun, not even after nine months of missing the freaking blond boy. Well, now obviously things changed. Kyungsoo sat back and stared at the floor guiltily and they both fell in silence once again; Baekhyun quietly sobbing into his hands. The silence dragged on until Baekhyun finally managed to stop his ugly sobbing. Wiping away his snot and tears with his sleeves – he would most probably throw this shirt later – Baekhyun glances at Kyungsoo, whose eyes for once weren’t enlarged.

“I’m sorry, Baek. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

He sighed, taking a second to stare up at the ceiling before he looks at Kyungsoo again. “It’s okay, Kyungie. I know you mean well, but… I can’t. Not right now. Not when –”

“You’re still hoping Sehun would make an appearance.” Kyungsoo finished his sentence, nodding his head in understanding. Baekhyun nodded sadly, receiving a hug from Kyungsoo. At that same time, the door bursts open and Jongdae appeared, pulling a grinning YiXing inside.

Jongdae grinned at Baekhyun, “Yah, you’ve a visitor, bacon. He’s at the door.”

Baekhyun managed to throw a glare at Jongdae for calling him bacon but Jongdae missed it because apparently he and YiXing have unfinished business that needs to get done in Jongdae’s room. Baekhyun wouldn’t let his mind dwell on it. The thought and image of Jongdae in bed is a nightmare. Ignoring the two lovebirds, Baekhyun craned his neck to see who’d come to visit her.  Kyungsoo seemed to have noticed first, however, because then he told Baekhyun he’ll be in the kitchen if needed. Curious, Baekhyun got up from the couch to head to the door.

It could’ve been a dream, because he was sure he’d been talking about this just mere seconds ago. Weren’t he and Kyungsoo talking about expecting Sehun at the door? Baekhyun’s dreams never really shatter, after all, because at that doorway was Oh Sehun, his past lover.

He was torn between jumping onto Sehun and ignoring him completely. What were his conditions when he decided to leave Sehun? He was sure he said something in the line of ‘find me only when you’re sure you love me’ but at the moment he doesn’t really care if Sehun hated him; he just wanted to kiss those lips. Sehun flashed him a small, nervous smile, and Baekhyun thinks he couldn’t hold himself up anymore, thus the reason for flinging his arms around Sehun’s neck, so close to crushing his lips to Sehun’s but managed not to just by a second.

The best part was that Sehun actually hugged him back almost equally as hard.

Baekhyun didn’t know if Sehun hugging him back meant something, but he followed his heart and presses a kiss onto Sehun’s lips, needy and longing and craving for Sehun’s skin underneath his. He rejoiced at the fact that Sehun was kissing him back, and he could feel Sehun’s hands on his waist, pulling him closer. They only pulled away as both gasped for air and looking into Sehun’s eyes for the first time in a long time, Baekhyun couldn’t handle the waves of emotions that crashed at him, allowing himself to burst into yet another set of tears. He was more aware of how unattractive he might look at the moment than of the feelings he was feeling.

Sehun wiped his tears away with his thumbs and he chuckled through his sobs because honestly, it was embarrassing and kind of stupid. It was only after a minute or two of kissing and wiping tears and just kissing when Baekhyun finally pulled away, far enough to look into Sehun’s brown eyes. Somehow he still needed to know why Sehun is here. With a hoarse voice, he broke the silence. “You found me.”

The taller boy could only nod, his own eyes glassy with tears. “I found you a long time ago, bacon. I found my answer. I love you, not what I was too busy making. And I’m sorry I didn’t realize it before. I’m sorry I hurt you. I never meant to.”

And it may seem childish again but Baekhyun thinks it’s enough. Enough reason for him to let Sehun back in, enough to give him another chance because god, he’d spent nine painful months with his mind revolving around this man in front of him. Besides, Sehun wouldn’t be here if he hadn’t truly changed. Sehun would have been on this doorstep nine months ago, a day after Baekhyun left because he still hadn’t realized his mistake. But he does now, that was why he’s here, eyes portraying apology but mostly love, directed solely for Baekhyun as his arms tighten around the smaller male. Baekhyun thinks his heart might explode.

The only disappointing part of this reunion was that he was crying.

Sehun kissed his cheek and willed for him not to cry and even though he failed to smile through his tears, he was smiling internally. “I love you too, pabo.”

Sehun may not be a man of promises but as he kissed Baekhyun with so much passion, so much love and everything good, Baekhyun could almost hear the promise he made through that kiss. A promise to love until the end, to stay forever. And he found that he trusted Sehun.

A dark-haired male clad in black suit strode into the room with a hand hooked over the arm of another man, dressed similarly as the first. Baekhyun recognized the both of them almost immediately, shrieking as he waved for the Kyungsoo’s attention. The said man squealed almost femininely before he abandons his boyfriend to rush over to his best friend. The smile that grazed Baekhyun’s lips was wide and hurting his cheeks but he couldn’t wipe it off of his face. It was his big day; his dream is finally coming true. He would remember this day forever.

He still remembered the very day that leads to this moment, of Sehun kissing him over the dinner table before he gets up only to go down on one knee before Baekhyun, presenting him the band that would tie them for eternity as he questions Baekhyun. Will you marry me? Baekhyun had cried again – he is truly disappointed with himself and he blames Sehun – before he nodded immediately. I do, I will marry you. They didn’t question how the marriage will take place. It didn’t matter. What mattered was the kiss that Sehun placed on his lips after that, the warmth of Sehun’s arms around him as he was being carried to their room, the intoxicating pleasure of becoming one, falling over the edge together. Nothing else mattered.

Now he sits in the makeup room, touching up his tux and slight make-up. It won’t be grand and not held in the church but still Baekhyun could feel the way his heart beat against his chest and his fingers trembled as he clasped his hands together on his lap. He had informed his parents the moment the date had been confirmed and his mother’s reaction was something he hadn’t wanted to hear but had kind of expected. She cried; and it wasn’t because she was happy. It was highly unlikely for them to appear today, but he silently hoped that they will.

“I’m so happy for you, Baekhyun baby.” Kyungsoo was saying as he wrapped his arms around Baekhyun, who closed his eyes and smiled as he returned the embrace.

Baekhyun blinked, his vision suddenly blurring. ing tears. “I’m happy, too.”

Jongdae touched up Baekhyun’s hair, smiling as well. “Yah, don’t start crying and ruin that make up I worked so hard on.”

Kyungsoo jabbed at his own eyes, kissing Baekhyun on the cheek. “Your dream came true, Baek. Remember what you said before when we were in high school? Of me and my lawyer boyfriend attending your wedding? It’s happening!”

Baekhyun laughed, nodding furiously as he remembered the immature feud they’d gotten into after that. “Of course I remember! You underestimated my relationship with Sehun.”

Another arm wrapped around Baekhyun’s shoulder, and he turned to his left to see Jongdae smiling at him. “It almost didn’t happen, though. But I’m happy it did. I’m happy for you.”

“Thank you, Jongdae-ah. I really appreciate you guys.” Baekhyun says just as the door opened and YiXing popped his head in, announcing that it’s time for Baekhyun to leave.

Kyungsoo clapped and went on to pull JoonMyeon out Jongdae, however, waited for Baekhyun to even out his breathing, which was taking longer than necessary. Finally he was able to breathe properly, apologizing to Jongdae before he followed his friend out of the room. They’d opted to run the ceremony at Jongdae’s villa by the beach and Baekhyun had spent almost months just decorating and planning everything for this special day. Now he walks alongside Jongdae towards the beach, where he could see their make-do priest, a friend of Sehun’s from college named Kris, and Sehun himself, awaiting his arrival. It wasn’t big and not one people would praise about, but he could feel the pricking of tears at his eyes at the beauty of what he was seeing.

He couldn’t see his parents anywhere amongst the little crowd consisting of less than ten people, and he couldn’t see Sehun’s parents either. And even though his heart cracked because they weren’t here on his special, he was still happy. His breath hitched upon the sight of his future husband, clad in an almost similar tux as he was in, short blond hair spiked up and face lit with a smile so beautiful Baekhyun thinks it wasn’t possible. He managed to hold back from the tears that threatened to fall as he finished the steps along the aisle and to where Sehun waits.

His hands fit perfectly along the curves of Sehun’s as they clasped in front of each other, eyes locked and smiles wide. And when it was time to seal their heartfelt vows, Sehun leaned in close to capture Baekhyun’s lips with his in a soft kiss. It wasn’t anywhere near formal or lawfully official, but Baekhyun didn’t care. It was enough to know that they are tied, with the golden bands around their fingers as a physical reminder, and the witnesses of friends from high school and college to approve of their union. Everything was enough.

That afternoon as their friends enjoy the reception, Sehun held Baekhyun in a back hug, facing the sea before them. He kissed Baekhyun’s cheek, soft and slow, and Baekhyun shuddered at the overwhelming happiness in his chest. “I love you,” Sehun says, kissing him again.

Baekhyun grins, turning so he could properly kiss his husband. “I love you too.”