2

His words, hasn’t in my head yet. But everything I’ve heard and am hearing … the doctor’s voice explaining my condition, the sound of cars passing by, the sound from television .. has been through my left ear. It’s like sound doesn’t exist on my right ear. After I’m back from the hospital, I locked myself in my room the whole day. I wanted to cry but my tears won’t flow. I was sad, devastated, angry but I can’t express it. So I just lay on my bed while looking at the ceiling the whole day.

“Seungri. Seungri ! SEUNGRI !” Jiyong hyung yelled startling me. We are now at the café, resting for a while since there are only a few customers.

“Wh-what? Oh hyung, you scared me.” I said calming myself.

“Jeez I’ve been calling out to you. Are you okay? Cause you keep daydreaming today.” Jiyong hyung asked me.

“Sorry hyung, I’m okay.” I said to him. I didn’t hear him at all …. I didn’t hear him ..

“Ji-jiyong hyung …” I called him.

“Hmmm?” He replied smiling.

“Nothing, thanks for caring.” I said faking a smile. How should I tell him? It would be weird if I just tell him. How will he react? How will others react?

“Here !” Jiyong hyung’s voice woke me up from my daydreaming. He then handed me the right part of his earphone. I then slowly take it and put it in my right ear. In that moment, it sunk to me that my world has been cut in half. I looked at Jiyong hyung and noticed that he is talking but I can’t hear anything. I can’t hear the music, I can’t hear what Jiyong hyung is saying, I can’t hear ! I then take off the earphone and looked at Jiyong hyung, “This song is great !” I said smiling. But the truth is, I’m not smiling. I can’t. I can’t smile …

“Right? My friend suggested it to me last night and I like it so I just want to share it to you.” He said smiling.

“I’ll be going now, I’m going to help Daesung hyung. Be right back.” I said smiling, leaving Jiyong hyung who are resting.

I’ve .. I’ve lost half of my world … I can’t hear. I can’t hear …. I’ve decided. I won’t tell them. I won’t tell anyone about my ear. I’m sure I’ll do just fine. According to the research I did, people who are deaf one ear can live normal lives. So I just need act normally. I want things to stay the way they’ve been. Especially with Jiyong hyung. I can do it ! You can do it Seungri ! You can do it.

“Seungri !” Jiyong hyung called for me. “Seungri, listen to this ! I forgot to show it to you earlier, it’s 2NE1 new song ! It’s really cool and daebak !” He said pulling me then he insert the earphone into my right ear. Oh no … my right ear !

Jiyong POV

“I’ll start from the beginning !” I said but then I accidentally hit the wrong button making it in high volume. Since the song is loud, it startled me. “WAH ! Oh my god, that freaked me out ! Sorry I hit the wrong –“ I said but I stopped my words when I looked at Seungri.

“Hmmm?” He hummed.

“No-nothing.” I said. I paused the song wanted to make sure about it.

“Jiyong hyung, the song is great ! It’s really catchy ! As always from 2NE1 hahaha. Their song always daebak !” He said smiling.

“Right!? I told you hahaha” I said forcing a smile. Seungri …

Seungri POV

It’s been a week and I’ve gotten used using one ear. I’m also getting good at pretending. I feel bad had to pretending that I can hear them and I feel more sorry asking them to repeat what they’re saying since I can’t really hear them. It always makes me feel … guilty. It’s not my fault my ear got like this but it’s my fault I always upset others and bring them troubles.

Ever since that day, I can never look at Jiyong hyung’s face when we both listen to music together. Because I’m scared if he’ll figure it out. And besides, I can ignore him if not looking at him by pretending that I’m listening to music but .. can I keep running away from him? From the one I love ..

We’re now in the café working like usual except today, the café is really crowded making this place a bit noisier than usual. And this is a bad thing for me as it will be harder for me to catch what they’re saying.

“Seungri ! Will …. help ….. for me?” Seunghyun hyung asked me when he saw me walking around wanting to help others.

“Sorry, what?” I said smiling awkwardly.

“Help … at … and be … not … everyone.” Seunghyun hyung said raising an eyebrow to me.

“Umm, sorry can you repeat it again?”

“Jeez … said … and ... not to … customers !” Seunghyun hyung said raising his voice a bit.

“O-ok hyung !” I said smiling. Although I didn’t hear what Seunghyun hyung said, I don’t dare to ask him again. I don’t want to make him more angrier at me ..

No one POV

The café is crowded today, making the workers in the café busier than before. Seungri is doing the job quiet well until he accidentally crashed with one of the customers making him fall onto a table, making some of the food and drinks on it to fall and crashed on the floor making a mess.

Seungri POV

Even though my hearings are not that good as I used to be, the crashing sound is loud enough for me to hear. Everyone in the café are now looking at me as I’m sitting on the floor with a mess around me.

“Are you okay?” One of the customers who I accidentally knocked their table asked me.

I looked at them forcing a smile, “Y-yeah, I’m okay. Sorry about that.” I said while cleaning the mess.

“I told you to be careful !” Seunghyun hyung said raising his voice.

“I’m s-sorry hyung ..” I said bowing my head a little while still cleaning the mess.

“Next time you should listen when someone talking to you ! You don’t listen at all when someone explaining it to you ! We even had to keep repeating it !” Seunghyun hyung said to me.

“I-I’m sorry .. I’m really sorry ..” I said still cleaning the mess.

“I’m sorry guys but the truth is Seungri can only hear with one ear.” Jiyong hyung said suddenly appearing next to me helping me. Wha-what? H-how? H-how did he know? N-No way …

“His right ear cannot hear anymore. It was so sudden so he got scared. He don’t want to trouble you guys so he keep it as secret from you guys and carry the burden alone. He don’t know how to tell you guys about it so please do forgive him.” Jiyong hyung continue. I just look at him shocked and speechless. B-but how? How did he know? I tried my best hiding it ..

“O-oh, then it’s my fault. I’m sorry Seungri. Why didn’t you tell us about it? How are we supposed to know about it?! Anyway, I’m sorry again for speaking harshly to you. Next time, you should tell us so we can help you.” Seunghyun hyung said. I just look at him, still shocked with what had happened. I then looked at Jiyong hyung, “Ji-jiyong hyung ..” I said . I can fell that my tears are about to fall but I tried my best to hold it. But I failed. I feel a tear drops on my hand then suddenly Jiyong hyung pulled me out from the café.

He pulled me to the back of the café and luckily nobody is here. He just hold my hands as my tears keeps falling. “Ho-how do -” I said wanting to ask him how did he know but cut my word.

“You are someone who always think about others so I understand why you want to keep it as a secret but … But can you at least tell me about it? I want you to tell me. I’m always there for you, aren’t I!?” He said looking at me. His face .. his face is so sad. In his eyes, I can see care, sadness and disappointment .. I’m a fool. I’ve been hurting and brings trouble to everyone this whole time by hiding it.

“I’m-I’m sorry .. I’m really sorry !” I said crying.

“I-I was scared ! I got scared that if I tell you, you’ll get further from me ! That’s why I keep it to myself ! I don’t want to be a burden, I just want things to be like it was before I …” I can’t continue my words so I cried.

He then walked towards me and hugged me, rubbing circles on my back. It was a peaceful silent, not a word exchange between us. Only my sobs can be heard but I don’t mind. I like it, his presence calms me down and his hug warms me. “H-How did you know .. and why .. why did you pretend not noticing about it?” I asked breaking the silence.

He then cupped my face, looking straightly to my eyes, “I’ve known you for quite some time now, of course I would know. I care about you Seungri. And don’t worry, I’m not going to anymore.” He said smiling.

“And don’t you ever worry, I will never leave you. You know why? Because I love you. I won’t let you cry alone from now one Seungri.” He said wiping my tears. I was shocked. Did I hear correctly? Did he really said that he loves me? I just look at him, speechless.

“Don’t worry Seungri, you’re not hearing wrong. I mean it, really. I love you, Lee Seungri. I love you from the bottom of my heart.” He said smiling.

“I-I love you too hyung !” I said crying more.

“Don’t be scared anymore, okay? If you're scared then don't worry, let me be your other ear. Let me be a part of you world. Let's listen to the world together.” He said staring at me in the eyes. He then moved his head towards me. Our lips are just inches away and it’s getting lesser by the second. Our lips touched making our world combined.

I may lost a part of my world, but with him, I’m whole again.