6. Ravi's adivce

            Hong Bin wasn’t in his usual state for the next few days.

            His smile seemed a little off, and he even mocked his Hyungs less. What was wrong with him? He wondered, was it because of you?

            That’s got to be it, that he felt guilty for leaving you… Well there wasn’t much he could have done, he couldn’t have left you a phone number where you could call him at – they shared a phone after all…

            Imagine what would happen if Hakyeon Hyung picked up the phone to a girl crying, shouting out the phone saying “You took my ity and you left me there to hang?!”

            Not that he thought you were a person like that.

            In fact, your reaction shocked him a little.

            How could a girl, loosing something so important to her, just go “oh I’m good.”. Did you not like yourself very much?

            The more he thought about it, the more he worried, and the more guilt he felt. Hence the absence of his usual smiles.

            He really didn’t do one-night stands, that time would probably have been his first. Not his first time to have , obviously, but still, he never knew he could get that intimate with someone he just met.

            Sighing, he came to the conclusion that perhaps Lee Hong Bin is much more of a ert than he gives himself credit for.

            “Hong Bin!” Ravi knocks on the door of one of the practice rooms.

            Without much though, he barges in, carrying a laptop in his hand. “I’ve got a new composition to show ya, do you think you have time to give some advice?”

            “Sorry, Wonsik, I’m not really in the mood –“

            “Hong Bin,” Ravi started, “What’s wrong with you? You seem so down lately.”

            Hong Bin opened his mouth. Could he trust Ravi? Sure they were friends but he didn’t know how Ravi would react… Ravi had the image of being a play boy because of his role as Rapper, but then Ravi was very protective of his littler sister… He didn’t know if he could tell him…

            “Wonsik, I’m fine.” Hong Bin smiles.

            Ravi raised his eyebrow. “You know manager-hyung and the other Hyungs are all really worried about you after you came back to the dorm at 8 in the morning that day right?”

            “I know, Wonsik…”

            “You said you just stayed over at a friend’s house, but you couldn’t tell us which friend exactly.” Ravi crossed his arms. “Did you stay with a girl?”

            Hong Bin’s eyes widened. How could Ravi be so good at this. “Wonsik…” He began, scratching his head.

            Ravi put out his hand to stop him.

            “Hong Bin,” he began, “I don't care if you did, I am a man too, and I know you have needs just like anyone else, but please remember you are an idol. What you are doing could also harm the girl too, so you really need to be careful –“

            “I know, Wonsik, but that’s not what I am tormented about…”

            “What do you mean?”

            Hong Bin took a deep breath. He looked into Ravi’s eyes, full of worry.

            “I was her first time.”

            It was Ravi’s eyes that widened this time.  He looked at Hong Bin, the seeming harmless boy. Uncontrollably, he let out a low chuckle.

            “It’s not funny.”

            Ravi shook his head, still laughing. “Wow, Binnie, I didn’t think you’d ever had the guts to… Wow.” He gave an impressed look.

            “I said, it’s not funny.” He honestly didn’t know!

            “I know I know.” Ravi calmed himself down. Talking back in his serious tone, he asked, “what did she say?”

            Hong Bin blushed a little, thinking of the awkward encounter he had with you, half . “She said… it was good.”

            “That’s it?”

            “… I think so.”

            Ravi clapped his hands. “Well then there’s nothing to worry about, she must have wanted to get rid of her ity quickly, and was just using you as a tool. I guess you both used each other, so there’s no harm done.” Ravi put his hand on Hong Bin’s shoulder, “it was just .”

            After Ravi left, Hong Bin still couldn’t get his mind around it.

            Was that really the case? If so, why did your look make him so sad? And why did the thought of the way your fingertips touched his body still make him shiver with guilt?

            Did he take advantage of you? Or was it the other way around?

            Frustrated, he pulled on the hem of the new shirt he bought just days ago.

He wondered if you still had his old shirt.

_____

Ravi's cameo :D teehee