I was never a fan of surprises.

Most of the time, they were meant as something good being given to you, depending on the person. It was meant to help make you feel good and bring a smile on your face. I've never experienced those as a child. The surprises that I recieved weren't even surprises to me, since I experienced them everyday. Whenever I was surprised, it would be when my father would hit me, or whether he brought home a special "friend".

I remember the first time it happened. It was rare of my father to leave the house, unless he was buying more alcohol or paying the rent. I was probably about six years old when it happened. It was late after midnight when my father showed up again. I awoke from my sleep when I heard weird sounds, and when I walked downstairs, I found my father on the couch with a woman.

I gawked at the scene in front of me. I had never seen my father go anywhere near a woman before, and if he ever did, he never touched them like the way he was touching this woman now. He was practically eating her, and it disgusted me. I even felt a hint of betrayal. He had always claimed that he loved my mother more than anything. He even hated me, since he blamed me for her death. Yet, he was doing things with this woman who probably didn't even know his name. It made me angry.

"Dad, what are you doing?!" 

My father jerked away at the sound of my voice, and his eyes hardened when they landed on me. His fierce expression made me hide behind the stair railings. The woman lifted her head, and I got a good look of her face. She didn't look any older than twenty one years old, compared to my father who was about ten years older than her. I was even more disgusted. 

"You brat! I thought I told you to never meddle in my business!" My father roared, and I flinched. I clutched my teddy bear tightly in my arms and stood against the wall.

"But how could you do this?! How could you betray mom with this woman?! She's not even that pretty." Mom was ten times more beautiful. My father clenched his jaw and finally walked over to me. My eyes widened and I tried to make a run for it, but my father grabbed me by my hair and yanked me back. Tears had already flown free, and I saw that woman just simply watching.

Why isn't she doing anything?

"Why you little- I thought I told you to never bring her name up again! Go ruin someone else's life." He threw me on the stairs, and my head hit the edge of the step. By that time, I was wailing, bleeding, and unable to move from pain. And they only continued to eat each other up. 

Each week my father brought home a different woman, but he always did the same thing with her. 

I never thought that he would end up cheating on my mother. That was a real surprise for me.

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"Hana, do I seriously have to kick this door open and drag you out?"

Jongup let out an impatient sigh as he slammed his foot against the bathroom door. I flinched from the action and nearly smeared my makeup in the process. I sighed and gently ran my fingers through my curled hair.

"Well, how am I supposed to come out wearing something like this? I feel so... ." And it's true too. 

Tonight, Jongup and I were going to a night club along with some of the other workers from the cafe. It had been several days since we've arrived in Seoul, and since then, they always welcomed us with open arms. They made us feel at home, and they were even kind enough to invite us to their favorite night club. I was both nervous and excited to go, because it would be my first time visiting a club. One of the workers was even kind enough to give me one of her dresses suitable for clubbing. However, it was a y dress, one that exposed my entire back and stopped about two inches above my knees. Though I wanted to make sure that I looked suitable enough, I held doubts in my head. I didn't think I was pretty enough to wear such a dress, and especially in front of Jongup.

I heard Jongup mumble something. "Can you please just come out? We're going to be late, and I'm curious about how you look right now."

My cheeks flared red. My hand was lingering on the door knob, but I made no attempt to open the door. My heart was racing rapidly in my chest, and I could feel sweat beginning to build. 

It's only Jongup. He's always honest, and he will tell you to leave it on or take the dress off. He will tell you if you look y or not.

I inhaled deeply and finally opened the door. My heart nearly stopped when my eyes landed on Jongup, who had been casually leaning against the wall with his hands shoved in his pockets. He looked handsome wearing that light green dress shirt and black jeans. Time seemed to slow down when his gaze finally landed on me. His eyes immediately widened and his mouth dropped open. I blushed and lowered my head in slight embarrassment as his eyes traveled up and down my body. My hand was still tightly grasping the door knob and I almost had the urge to run back into the bathroom. It was so hot by then.

Jongup slowly walked over to me now, face still glowing with shock. I couldn't even look at him, so instead I kept my gaze on his sneakers. Jongup grabbed my hand and twirled me around, and he let out a gasp as he saw how my back was completely exposed. 

"Absolutely not!"

He immediately reached for his jacket and draped it over my shoulders. I raised my brows in surprise.

"That dress is extremely provactive! Don't you know that guys will prey on you?" He scolded me, sounding like the father I never had. My hands tightly gripped his jacket, and I let out a sigh. Does that mean that he doesn't like it? 

"Go change into something else. Who needs a dress to go clubbing anyway?"

My heart sank at his words. I frowned and shook my head. "No way. Guys won't even look at me, and even if they do, I won't pay any attention to them." I wanted to look my best tonight. I wanted to impress the workers. Jongup's reaction made my confidence sink a bit. I was hoping that he would like it, but I guess that I was wrong. He didn't even mention that the dress itself was pretty.

Jongup ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "Hana, guys won't stop. They'll look at you with lustful gazes. I don't want you to get hurt, nor do I want you talking to any guys." For some reason, I got really annoyed by his words. Why was he suddenly yelling at me? And what gave him the right to tell me what to do? I wanted to meet new people too, because that was a part of life that I hadn't experienced yet.

"Why are you getting angry at me? Is it so bad to try and look pretty for once? And maybe I would like to meet some new people, so why would you care?" As soon as the words left my lips, I immediately wished that I could take them back. Jongup's face flashed with anger and hurt. 

"You know what, maybe I don't care. Go ahead, meet some new people. Don't say that I didn't warn you when some guy tries to drag you into a nearby closet!" My eyes widened in shock. I didn't even know how to respond. Jongup scoffed and walked out of the room then, leaving me with a cracked heart. I couldn't believe that he said that. Tears nearly formed in my eyes. Night clubs didn't sound so fun anymore.

Jongup didn't even look at me during the ride to the club. I could only stare out the window and fiddle around with my fingers. The atmosphere was filled with tension. Jongup's jacket was still draped around my shoulders, so I wrapped it tightly around me and inhaled his scent. I just hoped that we would be back to normal by the end of tonight. It was rare of us to fight, and I hated it whenever it happened.

The club was called Poison. The music could be heard loudly, and as I neared the building, the beats made the ground and my body vibrate. I was nervous truthfully. Jongup didn't speak nor look at me, but his hand interlocked with mine as we entered the building. I knew that he was still mad, but it was nice enough that he wouldn't just dump me in the middle of the crowd. I held onto his arm tightly as we made our way through sweaty bodies. I heard some guys whistle at me, but I just ignored them. It was so hot inside.

The workers were sitting at a bar towards the far back of the club, away from the dance floor. As soon as we reached them, Jongup let go of my hand. I already missed his warmth.

"Whoa Hana!" Himchan chuckled and winked at me. Himchan was our boss of course, and though he likes to crack jokes and mess around with us, he's really nice and warm at heart. "That dress looks lovely on you." My cheeks slightly reddened at the compliment, though my heart remained at its normal speed. Strange, when others compliment me, I'm fine. However, when it's Jongup, my heart is ready to fly out of my chest.

"Oh I knew that I made a good choice!" One of the workers, Sunmi, beamed at me. She was one of the waitresses at the cafe. She's one of those girls with lots of aegyo and a bubbly personality. Sunmi took Jongup's jacket off of my shoulders. I tensed up, because by then Jongup did look at me. And he wasn't happy at all. Everyone but him complimented me. Though I was flattered, I was still upset. My best friend was angry at me and I was not in the mood to party.

We spent some time talking and laughing together. Jongup was talking to everybody else except me, and it actually made me angry. What did I even do to deserve this kind of treatment. It's already enough that I was unloved by my own father, but to have Jongup angry at me? Absolutely out of the question. He was all I had left. 

The group went out to the dance floor, but Jongup and I decided to just stay at the bar. The dance floor was really crowded, and I even saw some people doing some not-so-innocent touching. I felt that it was just safer to stay behind. 

From the corner of my eye, I saw a guy sit next to me. He immediately glanced at me and smiled. I had to admit, he was adorable. He had such a cute baby face and looked younger than he might actually be.

"Hi, I'm guessing that you don't like to dance?" He sounded friendly. I figured that it wouldn't hurt. I saw Jongup look at me now. I shrugged in reply and fiddled around with my fingers.

"I do, but I'd rather not suffocate and be trapped against other people." I lightly smiled. The guy chuckled and nodded at me.

"Yeah same here. Besides, I'm new to clubs and I get nervous." 

"Me too." The guy smiled and held out his hand. "I'm Junhong." I hesitated for a moment. I could feel Jongup's gaze on me, making me tense up. Junhong huh. He didn't seem like the type to prey on girls for fun, and he seemed genuinely kind. I shook his hand and nodded. "Hana."

"What a pretty name. Also, that dress looks really nice on you." 

I heard Jongup scoff, and I resisted the urge to turn around and smack his head. I brushed some strands of hair away from my face and lightly smiled, thanking him. Even somebody who I just met compliment me kindly, and Jongup had never said those words once. Was I that unattractive in his eyes?

Junhong and I hit it off right away. He really was a kind and innocent person. He was really funny and always held a smile on his face. In Jongup's absence, it felt nice to have somebody else to talk to. However, I still missed him, and I hated that he was angry with me. He didn't even seem to care anymore, because he had even walked away from the bar. He went back to the group where they were first seated. My heart felt heavy and I sighed.

I introduced Junhong to the group. They welcomed him kindly and even invited him to play a game with us. Jongup didn't bother saying hi, nor did he look like he wanted Junhong to be there. In fact, the man was shooting daggers at him, and the maknae noticed it too.

We started daring each other to do crazy things. Himchan ended up doing the chicken dance on top of the table, and Sunmi had to give another worker a thirty second . Though it was pretty funny, I wondered if people actually did this stuff without fear - like they didn't care who they did it with and what they did. Are people even supposed to act like this?

"Hana," Sunmi's eyes glittered with mischief, and I gulped in anxiety. "I dare you to place a thin piece of paper on your lips and pass it to Junhong two times. If it falls, you have to kiss him." My eyes widened in surprise at her boldness. I immediately glanced at Jongup for help, and he was deeply glaring at me. His eyes were screaming for me to reject the dare. 

"You're getting off easy. I would've dared you to actually make out with him." Junhong let out a shaky laugh and turned to me, an expectant look on his face. "Wanna do it?" I blinked and looked away. I didn't want to do it, but I didn't want to seem like a coward in front of them. It really was an easy dare, way better than actual lip contact. I've never been kissed before, and I certainly didn't want my first one with a stranger.

"Are you scared?" One of the workers began to tease me, and I frowned. Jongup actually chuckled at that, and it made me angry. Junhong stuck the paper to his lips and stared at me expectantly. I gulped and looked away, but the workers were practically chanting for me to do  it. Junhong ended up leaning in first and pressed the paper against my lips. My heart was racing rapidly in anxiety, and I managed to succeed. Everyone cheered at us like we scored a winning goal. Jongup was glaring at me though, and he looked like he was fuming.

"I need some air." He murmured at he stood up. I reached out for his hand but he yanked it away from me and walked away. I wanted to cry. How many mistakes can one person commit in one day?

I wasn't having much fun anymore, so I decided to leave. Junhong and I exchanged numbers and he thanked me for welcoming him. It was nice to get to know other people and to have fun with them, but honestly, Jongup was enough for me. I found him sitting inside his car. He was playing games on his phones and didn't bother looking up when I got into his car. He didn't speak once, and I felt the anger radiating off of him. I didn't even understand why he was so angry at me in the first place. What did I even do to him?

The silence was literally suffocating me. Jongup was almost never angry. He was always the person who wore a smile on his face and barely spoke above a normal voice. He almost never yelled and almost never frowned. He frowned for the entire night, and the brightness in his eyes was no longer there. When we arrived at our hotel room, I decided to confront him.

"Yah, why are you so angry at me?"

Jongup didn't answer me and he simply walked past me. My eyes twitched in irritation and I slammed the door shut.

"What did I do to make you so upset?"

He checked his phone and decided to search through a random app. He was acting like he didn't hear me, and that both fueled my anger and pained my soul.

"Answer me!"

In the next moment, my back was against the wall. Jongup's face was hovering a few inches away from mine, and he slammed his hand down on the wall beside my head. I flinched, because I wasn't expecting this at all. I could feel the actual anger he held, but I saw more disappointment and hurt. I felt awful.

"You want an answer? Fine. I don't like it when my best friend tries so hard to gain other people's attention. And dressing like this-" He gestured to my dress and high heels. I had to admit, I didn't even dress like that. "-Could gain the attention of an unwanted crowd, yet you couldn't understand that. And it seems that someone just hopped on board."

I frowned at his words. "Excuse me? Junhong wasn't out to get me. I only talked to him because he seemed nice."

"Hana, you don't even know him. Just because he was nice doesn't mean that he will always be nice. There will always be people that will hurt you in this world." His words made me think of my father. My father made sure to make my life miserable, and I hated him for it. However, I found Jongup, who was never out to get me at all. Not everyone hurts other people. It actually made me sad to even think about it.

"And how could you just kiss him? He might've saw this as an oppurtunity, especially with that dress on." 

"We didn't kiss." 

Jongup sighed loudly and slammed his other hand against the wall. I didn't flinch this time. I was gazing deeply in his eyes, trying to find out exactly what he was angry about. He just keeps shooting words at me and it confuses me.

"You practically did. That paper was just a thin barrier."

He was really starting to annoy me.

"Why do you care if we kiss or not? You said it yourself. You didn't care about what I did." I crossed my arms over my chest and frowned.

Jongup clenched his jaw and glared into my eyes. I stared back, holding my head high. I didn't like the fact that we were arguing, much less in the position we were in. I tried so hard to not look at his lips. They were too close to mine.

Jongup's facial expression softened a bit, and he just sighed and buried his face into my neck. I bit my lip and took a deep breath to calm myself down. Surely, he would be able to feel my heart thumping against my chest.

"I don't like it when I see my best friend hanging out with strange guys. They might take advantage of you." I felt myself nearly smile again. Jongup was truly an idiot. If he was so worried, why did he get so angry? Ignoring me and leaving me behind is even more dangerous. Jongup let out another sigh and lifted his head again. His brows were furrowed together and he was frowning. He didn't look like he was angry, but instead, deep in thought.

"Promise me that you will never do something like this for the sake of other people." He was almost pleading. My gaze flickered away and I bit my lip. There was something that I held inside that Jongup would never understand. He would just never understand that I try so hard for him, but he sees past him.

"I promise..." I whispered and gently pushed Jongup away. I fanned my face with my hand and walked back to the bed. My heels were starting to kill me. Jongup lingered by the door for a moment, and he looked like he was lost in thought. I grabbed a pillow from the bed and threw it at him.

"Yah, wake up."

Jongup lightly chuckled and took a seat next to me. He was frowning again. I hope that there wasn't more reason for him to be upset with me. Jongup shook his head and stared at his socks.

"Did you want to kiss him?"

"Huh?"

I turned and stared at Jongup with my eyes wide. He had his eyes closed and was taking a deep breath. I couldn't believe what I just heard. Did he just not understand everything that I explained to him? I shoved his arm and shook my head.

"I don't even know Junhong. He's adorable, but I'm not attracted to him."

"You still kissed him though."

"It was not a kiss! My first kiss should be with someone special, not some stranger!" 

I smacked the back of his head and shoved him. He winced and rubbed the back of his head. He deserved it too. Sometimes Moon Jongup can be the biggest idiot ever. He sighed and suddenly his expression turned serious. His eyes shrank a bit and darkened slightly. I blinked and just stared at him.

"Should we... kiss?"

My brain started to malfunction. I leaned back a bit and stared at Jongup, unable to comprehend his words. I wasn't even sure if I had somehow slipped into my fantasy world, or if he just actually said those words to me for real. So I ended up pinching his arm to check. He winced and gently shoved my hand away.

"Why are you pinching me? I asked you if you wanted to kiss me."

My ears began to light up in flames. I was sure that my ears were malfunctioning as well, because I was sure that I wasn't hearing right. I was sure that I was stuck in my fantasy world, the one that I always drift off into whenever I watch dramas with kiss scenes in them. I always imagined myself doing the same with my best friend, though I knew that it was wrong. Best friends most certainly don't kiss, and yet, why was Jongup asking me this?

My mouth hung open, but no words left them. I was so mortified that I couldn't even blink. Jongup was smiling like a fool, an expectant look on his face. He didn't seem to be offended by my lack of response. My heart was screaming yes, but my brain was hesitating.

"Hana," Jongup inched closer to me and held my hands. He stared into my eyes, and I visibly gulped. "Do you want to kiss me?"

"Best friends don't kiss each other. Kisses are meant to be made by lovers." I whispered, trying to take my hands back. He only tightened his grip. His gaze didn't waver. 

"I want to experience many special experiences with you. You're my best friend and you always come first." 

I was touched by his words, but I don't think he understood me. My heart was literally hurting my chest because it was thumping so hard. Jongup looked so innocent and adorable at that moment that I couldn't even shake my head no. Jongup widely smiled at me and brushed some strands of hair away from my face. I gulped again. I couldn't even look at him anymore. I didn't even know what was happening anymore.

"I don't want you to do this with anyone else." 

Jongup took a deep breath and started to lean in. At the same time, I was moving back. Jongup raised a brow at me. 

"Hold still." One of his hands traveled up to my neck and got tangled in my hair. The contact sent chills down my spine. His hand held my head in place as he slowly leaned in. My breathing was becoming quicker, and I panicked when his face was directly in front of me. By then, his eyes had fluttered closed and our lips were about to touch...

"Wait!" I placed my hands on his chest and pushed him back a bit. His eyes opened and he looked surprise. My face was so hot and red and I had to look away. I had been suffocating as Jongup neared closer to my face and at the last minute I couldn't take it anymore. My breathing was ragged. Jongup cast me a questioning look. I sheepishly looked down at my lap and let out a sigh.

"It's just that... I have a feeling that I... won't be any good. I want it to be special and... well, actually, I-" I rambled on and my sentence didn't make sense. I wanted this, badly. However, I didn't want to screw up and ruin it. I was inexperienced and I didn't even know what to do. However, Jongup cast me a smile and rubbed small circles on the back of my neck with his thumb. Goosebumps rose on my skin by then.

"It's ok, because we only learn from experience. Just, follow me." Jongup leaned in again, and I tried to not move away again. I squeezed my eyes shut and balled my hands into fists. I could feel his breath hit my lips, and my mind just shut down. 

He pressed his lips to mine and lingered there for about five seconds before pulling away. I would never forget those five seconds. His lips felt softer on mine than I had imagined. Jongup smiled at me and one of his hands caressed my cheek.

"Are you alright?" Dazed, I only nodded. He chuckled at my lost expression and poked my cheek. "Can I continue, or would you rather stop?" I ended up nodding quickly. I didn't want to look desperate, but I couldn't help it. I just wanted to experience his lips on mine once more. He chuckled again and leaned in, this time with hesitation. He pressed his lips on mine once more, and about three seconds later, his lips began to move. I felt lost and was unsure of what to do, so I just followed his movements. I guess that I was doing a good job, because Jongup just ended up pulling me closer to him. 

I felt like I just left the world and ended up soaring through the atmosphere. My mind was completely blank. I forgot how to breathe. I was only focused on Jongup's lips moving against mine.

Best friends shouldn't kiss.

I pulled away first to take a breath as soon as I felt myself begin to suffocate. Jongup leaned his forehead against mine and stared at me.

"It feels good."

He gave me a moment to recompose myself before he kissed me again. He pulled me closer to him while I wrapped my arms around his neck. Butterflies formed in my stomach. It felt so good to be like this. Jongup rubbed small circles on the back of my neck, and his other hand traveled around to my exposed back. His hand felt really hot when he made contact with my bare skin. It made electricity shoot through my veins.

Jongup ended up leaning forward even more, causing me to slowly lay down on the bed without breaking the kiss. He climbed on top of me and supported himself up with one arm. I could feel my heart reach new limits with this new position.

You shouldn't even be doing this. Stop it now.

Jongup pulled away, only to begin placing soft pecks on my neck. My chest heaved up and down quickly, and I grabbed a handful of his shirt.

"You're hurting me." I didn't realize that my nails were digging into his skin. "S-sorry." 

He placed several kisses along my jawline and made eye contact with me. "Hana, it's ok. Relax." He cast me a smile of encouragement, and I bravely pulled him down to kiss him. His tongue traced the outline of my lips. I unknowningly opened them and I felt his tongue slip inside. It was warm and felt strange, but good at the same time.

The entire time, it was quiet. Only the sound of our ragged breaths were heard. I don't know how much time has passed, but it didn't seem to matter to us. We had forgotten about everything. The fight, Junhong, the dare - I tossed those thoughts away the moment the word "kiss" left Jongup's lips.

"How was it?" Jongup asked as he pulled away. He was breathing hard and his cheeks were flushed. I could only stare at him with a dazed expression as I tried to catch my breath. He took my lack of response as a good thing though. He cheekily smiled and got off of me. I was frozen and couldn't move. Reality didn't fully hit me yet.

"I want you remember this, because I know I will." He reached into his shirt and pulled out our necklace. He grabbed mine and linked them together.

"I'm glad that I got to experience this special moment with you." He placed one last peck on my lips before pulling away. I recomposed myself and smiled at his words. Jongup helped me sit up and he rubbed my . I tried so hard to not flinch from his actions.

"I'm going to take a shower." Jongup smiled at me and ruffled my hair as he stood up. He seemed pretty calm for something that nearly killed me in the process. As soon as I heard the shower start, I reached for a pillow and buried my face in it. I screamed out all of my joy and excitement as reality dawned on me. I couldn't believe that Moon Jongup, my best friend, actually kissed me. Heaven knows how much that I wanted it, but there was a small part of me that regretted it.

Jongup was very honest with me. He always spoke out his true feelings and never hesitated to tell me anything. Deep down, I knew how I felt for my best friend. However, I felt that it was dangerous to feel this way. I would only be hurting myself, because I knew that Jongup never felt the same for me. He had never admitted it, and he had never had that reaction nor shown me that there was a mutual attraction. I always convinced myself that just having him by my side as a best friend was enough, but why did my heart insist otherwise? 

I was never a fan of surprises. 

However, this was the best surprise that I have ever recieved. And I will never forget it.

Author's Notes

Hey guys! ^^

Phew, I wrote this chapter in one go xD

I hope that it wasn't sloppy at all.

Also, to avoid any confusion:

Just because they kissed, doesn't mean that they're together xD 

There is a reason why I made them like this :P

It'll be revealed soon enough lol ^^

Comments are loved~ <3

Also, any Babyz went to NYC concert? :D

Or are going to any of the other concerts?

It was amazing!!!!!! <3 Omg, and I swear, I was waving like a maniac in the crowd, and Himchan saw me and waved at me!

Aigooo, he's soooo adorable! <3

I've never fangirled so much in my life.....

:3 Hehehe~

Fighting!~

~BAPisPerfect~