Jongin didn't know what he was going to do or how he was going to do it, but he had to do something. He didn't want it to go on like this, with him on the outside and Baekhyun and Kyungsoo in their own little world. He was sick of being a voyeur of their intimate moments, the little actions and whispered words that he didn't fully understand. He wanted to understand too, to hear those hushed words and feel those soft touches himself. And he desperately, achingly wanted to feel Kyungsoo's lips against his. He'd never wanted anything as much as this in his entire life.

However, Kyungsoo seemed so happy when he was with Baekhyun, and Jongin didn't want to ruin that. It was all so confusing, and frustrating, and these thoughts plagued Jongin all day. After witnessing Baekhyun and Kyungsoo kissing the night before, Jongin couldn't help but avoid the two throughout the day. With all the thoughts running through his head, he deemed it best to not be around the two boys in case he suddenly blurted something out that he would regret. He had caught the eye of Kyungsoo earlier on, and the poor thing looked quite confused when Jongin had darted away with a mumbled excuse. Baekhyun had seemed indifferent, and didn't bother him at all. Jongin ended up at the SM building, dancing by himself for hours in the practice room. Dance was his passion, and it helped to distract him for a while.

But of course, Jongin couldn't avoid Kyungsoo forever. Not when they now shared a room.

Jongin was walking back to their room from his shower, his second one of the day. He definitely needed one after returning back to the dorm from dance practice. His black boxers hung low on his hips and he had a towel draped over his shoulders to catch any water dripping from his wet hair. He intended to quickly dry his hair and get into bed, thinking that Kyungsoo was still in the living room with the others, but as he pushed the door open, he froze in place. Kyungsoo was sitting on the edge of his own bed, looking smaller than ever as he fidgeted with his hands and picked at the fabric of his grey sweatpants. Jongin involuntarily made a small noise in the back of his throat, and Kyungsoo looked up with a jolt.

“Jongin,” Kyungsoo greeted, big eyes staring up at Jongin with an emotion he didn't recognise. For a second, Jongin didn't move, not entirely sure of what the elder boy wanted. But as Kyungsoo continued to stare, as if waiting for something, Jongin cleared his throat lamely and made his way into the room after slowly shutting the bedroom door behind him. He sank down onto his own bed, mirroring Kyungsoo's position. Jongin could feel his heart give a particularly loud thump in anticipation. For what, Jongin didn't know.

He watched as Kyungsoo fidgeted again, a nervous habit of his that Jongin had picked up on a long time ago.

“Kyungsoo...” Jongin wasn't even sure of what he was going to say, but he hated seeing Kyungsoo acting like this. It wasn't like him.

Kyungsoo glanced up and gave a wobbly smile. Jongin sensed he was about to speak, so he held his breath.

“Jongin, did- I mean, have I- did I do something?”

The question caught Jongin off guard, and he blinked. Kyungsoo's fidgeting didn't cease.

“What?” Jongin wanted to punch himself for blurting out such a stupid response.

Kyungsoo paused, small hands coming to grip his sweatpants.

“Well, it's just- It seems like you're avoiding me, and I'm not sure what I did! And I- If I did something wrong, I'm so sorry, Jongin! Please, tell me what I did, I've been thinking about it all day and I don't remember doing anything and-” Kyungsoo was rambling, another nervous habit of his, and it made Jongin's heart clench. He couldn't stand seeing him like this, so he immediately stood up and made his way over to the smaller, sinking down next to him and resting his larger hand over Kyungsoo's to still him.

Kyungsoo stared up at Jongin quietly, startled expression morphing into one of uncertainty. Jongin felt terrible. He never meant for this to happen. He had never wanted Kyungsoo to feel guilty for something he'd never done. Jongin cursed himself for being so stupid and immature. Of course Kyungsoo would notice he was avoiding him. But he had it all wrong.

“Soo, I- You didn't do anything. Stop worrying,” Jongin murmured, absent-mindedly running a thumb over the back of Kyungsoo's hand. The smaller visibly relaxed, letting out a deep breath. However, he still seemed somewhat stiff as he looked back up at Jongin.

“But you... you were avoiding me, Jongin. I could tell. Why would you-” Confusion swam in Kyungsoo's eyes. Jongin swallowed a lump in his throat. He couldn't do this to Kyungsoo. He couldn't lie to him, couldn't keep him in the dark and let him feel guilty for something he never did.

As Jongin studied Kyungsoo's face, searching his eyes without knowing what he was looking for, tracing the lines of his face as if he were soon to go blind, he decided. He knew he had to do something, he just didn't realise he would have to do it so soon.

“Kyungsoo, really. You didn't do anything. I mean, you did but-” Kyungsoo frowned at this, and Jongin quickly shook his head. “What I mean is, you're just-”

Jongin heaved a deep breath. He hadn't prepared for this, not all. He was stumbling over his words like a fawn taking its first steps, and he felt like a nervous wreck all too suddenly. Yet Kyungsoo was still sitting right next to him patiently, his undivided attention on Jongin. He had to do this.

“I can't stop thinking about you!” he blurted. “Kyungsoo, it's driving me insane. Ever since you walked through the door of the practice room. I just wanted to be your friend! I didn't know why, I just did! But then you seemed to cling to Baekhyun immediately and I felt like maybe you didn't need someone like me. Baekhyun seemed perfect for you, and you two were inseparable. I didn't want to intrude. But Kyungsoo, I- I'm such a terrible person. I feel so selfish. I don't know when exactly I changed my mind, but all I know is that I like you. A lot. I like you too much, actually. So much so that when you're with Baekhyun I can't look away, and I feel so ed up that it actually hurts. It hurts-”

Jongin felt his voice break, and he paused to swallow another lump in his throat. His eyes felt wet, but he couldn't recall when he had started to tear up. He turned to face the wall in front of him, too afraid at what he would see if he looked at Kyungsoo now.

“It hurts so much that some nights I can't sleep. Sometimes I can't concentrate on dance practice. Some days, all I can think about is you, and that I missed my chance. I screwed up. I had so many chances to show you how I feel, but by the time I realised it was too late. I'm too late, I- I saw you and Baekhyun kissing last night. I wanted that to be me, I wanted it to be my lips on yours. God, I'm so ing selfish. Of course you wouldn't want that. You have Baekhyun. You don't even need me. I'm so ing stupid, I-”

Jongin abruptly stopped as a hand gripped his arm tightly. He shakily turned to look at Kyungsoo, and was met with a pair of watery owl-like eyes. Once Jongin remained silent for a while, the hand was slowly removed. Kyungsoo visibly swallowed, his eyes never leaving Jongin's.

“I...I didn't know,” Kyungsoo choked, voice barely audible. Tears broke free and soon they were sliding down his alabaster cheeks. Jongin couldn't watch. He looked away once again, bracing himself for the rejection he knew was coming. However, as he was about to stand up to leave before he completely broke down, small arms quickly circled around his waist.

Jongin held his breath as he felt Kyungsoo's petite frame press into his back, the smaller's cheek coming to rest against Jongin's shoulder blade. He could feel Kyungsoo's tears as they slid from his cheeks onto Jongin's .

“Jongin. Oh, Jongin. Don't ever feel like you're unwanted. That you're stupid. You're not. It's so far from the truth, Jongin. You don't even realise,” began Kyungsoo, sniffling quietly. “Baekhyun and me, we're just- We're friends now. I mean, a long time ago we both thought we were something else, but things change. We changed, and we both realised we'd confused our friendly love with something more. I mean, we do- we'll always be close. Closer than normal friends. That's just how we are, and I don't think that will ever change.”

Jongin held back another sob as he silently listened to Kyungsoo's soft voice.

“I never knew that you thought that we were- I mean, I didn't know. Jongin, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry that you've been hurting like this. If I'd known, I would've- I would...” Kyungsoo tightened his hold around Jongin's waist as he trailed off.

“It's okay, Kyungsoo.” Jongin spoke, his voice sounding raw and foreign. “I get it-”

“No, you don't!” Kyungsoo suddenly exclaimed, arms pulling back. Jongin whipped his head around in shock, startled by Kyungsoo's outburst, to see the boy standing now. He possessed an almost desperate look in his large brown eyes, his chest rising and falling rapidly as his small hands clenched into determined fists.

“You don't get it, Jongin! I've always liked you! You've always taken care of me, always asked me how my day has been when no one else even bothered! Always encouraged me when I was feeling like , and spent extra hours in the practice room just to help me with new choreography! Baekhyun may have been the first person I felt close to here, but that's never stopped me from wanting to be close to you! Jongin, you don't even know how amazing you are! Don't you dare feel like you're not worthy.”

Kyungsoo took a deep breath, and Jongin shook his head in exasperation, looking down at the floor.

“Kyungsoo, you don't understand. I don't just like you, I- I think I'm in love with you-”

Kyungsoo stepped closer and reached his hands out to rest them on Jongin's warm cheeks, and the younger lifted his head.

“No Jongin, you don’t understand. You always jump to conclusions and you think too fast for your own good. Listen, would you?” Kyungsoo chuckled half-heartedly, running his thumb across Jongin's cheek to catch a stray tear. “I've never been very good at expressing my true feelings with anyone other than Baekhyun, but you... you're something else, Jongin. And when I say I like you, I mean it. I mean more than that, actually. I think I'm in love with you, too.”

Jongin thought he was dreaming. He had to be. This was everything he was wishing for, everything he wanted. How could it actually be real? He didn't even deserve-

“Jongin, stop it. I know you, I know what you're thinking, so stop it.” Kyungsoo then leaned down and pressed his lips against Jongin's. It was just a short, chaste kiss, but Jongin's heart raced regardless. And just as Kyungsoo leaned back and let his hands slowly fall from Jongin's face, it hit him. Jongin felt it. This was real.

Before he could even stop himself, he reached forward and wrapped his arms around Kyungsoo's tiny waist, rocking backwards so they both fell onto the bed. Kyungsoo giggled as Jongin wound an arm tighter around the smaller, his free hand snaking up to thread gently through Kyungsoo's hair.

They lay side by side on Kyungsoo's bed as Jongin held the singer close to him, closer than he ever had before. Kyungsoo couldn't hide his smile as he buried his head into the junction of Jongin's shoulder and neck, his hands resting on the younger's bare chest. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours, until their tears dried and their hearts beat in sync.

Jongin was almost drifting to sleep when Kyungsoo stirred, lifting his head of messy black hair and rising to lean on his forearms. Jongin rolled onto his back as he watched Kyungsoo peer down at him thoughtfully, a small smile playing on his features. His large eyes were swollen from crying, but Jongin thought he looked more beautiful than he'd ever seen him. He cautiously lifted a hand to brush Kyungsoo's bangs away from his forehead, afraid that any sudden movement would scare him away. He was relieved when Kyungsoo only smiled wider, teeth showing and lips pulling back into their trademark heart shape.

“Kyungsoo...” Jongin wasn't sure what he wanted to say. There was so much he had held off from saying to Kyungsoo, but now that the opportunity was here, he couldn't even organise his thoughts. However, there was one thing he wanted to clarify. “Does this mean... you'll be mine?”

Kyungsoo chuckled softly, shifting to cross his arms across Jongin's chest and rest his chin upon them.

“Yes, Jongin.”

Jongin thought for sure that he was grinning like an idiot, and he probably looked like he'd been to hell and back after all those tears, yet couldn't even find it in himself to care. He felt as though a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, and the hole in his heart had been filled. Kyungsoo was finally his.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when Kyungsoo shifted to the edge of the bed and stood up, making his way to the door. Jongin immediately sat up, blinking furiously as he experienced a head rush from the sudden movement. Kyungsoo paused before the door, looking back at Jongin as the younger made to get up.

“Jongin, relax. I just- I need to go talk to Baekhyun,” he explained, biting his lip absently.

“Now?” Jongin sounded like a lost child, and he inwardly cringed. He couldn't help but feel uneasy. After all that heartache, he finally had Kyungsoo to himself and the other was already leaving. Kyungsoo caught the look Jongin was giving him and he swiftly crossed the room, seating himself next to the dancer.

“Jongin, about what I said earlier... how Baekhyun and I are closer than normal friends. Well, I need to tell him about this.” Kyungsoo paused, looking nervously at Jongin to make sure he was listening. “And you have to understand that we've been close for such a long time, so it'll be hard for me to... to refrain from acting how I usually do with him.”

Jongin knew Kyungsoo was referring to how he and Baekhyun acted almost like lovers, with all their 'skinship' and their inability to stay away from each other. His mind immediately flashed back to the kiss he had seen, and he willed his cheeks not to flare up. Jongin wasn't sure what he should say, so he remained quiet as Kyungsoo continued to speak.

“Jongin, I'll try to distance myself. I really will, but please don't get angry! It's going to take some time and I don't know if I- we've always-” Kyungsoo was rambling again, visibly flustered as he once again started fidgeting. Jongin stilled Kyungsoo's hands with his own larger ones, causing the smaller boy to glance up.

“Shhh,” Jongin hushed, running his thumbs over Kyungsoo's wrists. “I understand, but I don't want to come between you and Baekhyun if it means you'll drift apart. I actually admire your relationship with him, I really do.” Kyungsoo's eyes widened at this, but Jongin continued on. “Kyungsoo... I trust you. I believe in you. All I need to know is that you love me.”

“I do, Jongin! I love you so much-” Kyungsoo cut himself off as he wrapped his arms around the younger's neck, his voice muffled by Jongin's shoulder. He pulled back to study the darker one's face. “Are you sure it won't bother you?”

Jongin let his hands rest on Kyungsoo's waist, I crooked smile taking on his features. He would hate to see Kyungsoo and Baekhyun separated. They had always been the most constant thing in his life, and he didn't have the heart to change anything about them. While he still had many questions he wanted to ask Kyungsoo in regards to his relationship with Baekhyun, he couldn't say that he was worried.

Kyungsoo was one of the most genuine, most caring people Jongin knew. He had a lot of love to give, Jongin was always aware of that. Baekhyun just happened to be the first outlet Kyungsoo had come across, and they'd formed a bond that Jongin could barely even begin to understand. While the kiss had indeed ignited Jongin's emotions, he looked back on it now in a different light.

Kyungsoo loved him. Kyungsoo loved him. He was still coming to terms with that fact, and it warmed Jongin to his very core. He would put all his trust in Kyungsoo, and he hoped Kyungsoo would do the same for him. Kyungsoo's relationship with Baekhyun now almost seemed like just another one of his quirks. It was a package deal, Jongin realised. And he didn't mind at all.

“Nothing about you could ever bother me, Kyungsoo,” Jongin replied simply, crooked smile still in place. Kyungsoo beamed and hugged him again, pressing a light kiss to Jongin's jaw before pulling away.

“I'll be back soon,” is all the smaller said before he got up and left their room. Jongin sat still for a while, too overwhelmed by everything that had just happened to even move. Soon, exhaustion hit him like a freight train. The day's roller-coaster of emotions had left him weary, so he hauled himself up and made his way over to his own bed with heavy footsteps. He crawled under the covers and let his head hit his pillow, eyelids drooping shut.

That night, he slept better than he had in years.

Part 3 will be up in a few days! Sorry for the long wait for this chapter haha. I have problems with my internet at home so I'm uploading this from uni lmao.
Please comment, tell me what you think! I definitely want to write some side-stories for this, but I'll talk more about that in the last part, so look forward to it! :D