"I was praying that you and me might end up together. It's like wishing for rain as I stand in the desert. But I'm holding you closer than most, cause you're my heaven."

“Yah! Don’t do that!” Kris said grabbing my hand to stop me for changing the channel.

“This is my flat! My TV! I can do whatever I want!” I replied laughing while clicking the remote, going through the various channels.

“But I bought the snacks!” he insisted

“So? I didn’t ask you to buy them,” I stick out my tongue childishly.

“Yah, you little---“ he gritted his teeth and tackle me into the carpet. “You ungrateful brat!” he said tickling me mercilessly.

“Hahahahaha oh my God, please stop! Ahahahaha! Stop it!” I laughed breathlessly, struggling helplessly against his strong body.

Kris ignored me and keeps tickling my ticklish spot. He also laughed like a maniac seeing my red face and worthless attempt to stop him.

Yeah, Kris and I are best friend. Super mega best friend.

And I love him. Yes, more than just a super mega best friend kinda love.

Call me a coward but I couldn’t tell him how I feel. I’m too afraid. I don’t have the guts to tell him.

I’m afraid he doesn’t like me back. Hell, I’m too ordinary! And he’s everything that I can’t have. Tall, handsome, has a powerful charisma. Me? I’m just a plain regular normal student.

He’s too good for me.

Maybe this is supposed to be a forever one-sided love...

+++

Kris has a strange behavior lately. He often reject my offer to hang out and he rarely text me now. I wonder what’s wrong with him. He never act like this before, usually he always tells me everything.

Actually, I really miss him. At least today is our game night. Every Friday, Kris and I always play a play station or whatever games we come up with at my house. So I will meet him today. I’m mentally grinning like a fool. I walked out of the gate of my uni, thinking of what should we do tonight. Suddenly, someone was shouting my name from a far.

“Yah! Suho!”

I stopped to see Kris running towards me while holding hand with a guy who looks younger than us. I notice that that guy is cute. He has a pale skin and slender body with a brown hair that compliment his bright face. I sense something that not quite right.

“Suho,” Kris said when he’s getting closer, “There’s someone I want you to meet,” he tugged the brunette so he can introduce me properly to him. “This is Taehyun, my boyfriend.”

Well, that escalated quickly. just got real.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and force myself to smile. I hope it didn’t come of as a grimace.

“Hello, Taehyun. I’m Suho. Nice to meet you,” I put my best fake smile while offering my hand.

Taehyun shook my hand and smile, “I’m Taehyun. Nice to meet you too.”

“So, yeah. Now that you two already met, Taehyun and I should go now,” Kris said. Taehyun already holds his hand.

“Huh? To where? But I thought today we’re going to play game in my house like usual?” I asked.

“Sorry, Suho. But I already promise Taehyun that I would accompany him shopping,” Kris said apologetically.

“Oh... Okay. Have fun!” I fake a cheerful voice and did my best to hide my hurt feeling.

Kris and Taehyun waved at me and walk hand in hand together. Leave me behind with a shattered heart. I shouldn’t be jealous, he’s not even mine. 

I lowered my head and sighed, continue walking to my home. He’s already has someone now. Why I have to be so coward to tell what I feel to him. Now, it’s just a wasteful feeling.

+++

We are at our favorite coffee shop. It’s been forever since the last time we go here. We are supposed to be talking about something fun or whatever. But instead, Kris was busy with his cellphone. Texting someone.

“Who are you texting?” I asked.

“Hmm? Taehyun of course,” he replied distractedly.

“How do you meet him, anyway?” I asked curiously since I never see Taehyun before. Kris also never tells me about him and suddenly they become a boyfriend.

Kris put his cellphone on the desk and sipping his ice Americano, “I’m not sure myself,” he said. At my raised eyebrows, he continued, “I mean, he asked me to go out with him. So I said yes.”

I stared at him in disbelieve. “So, you were not really know him beforehand? You just say ‘yes’ to him?”

He shrugged.

“But it means that you didn’t really know him!” I blurted out.

Kris glared at me. “So what? I’m in a relationship with him now, so I will learn something about him in the process.”

“Yeah, but I mean---“

“No, Suho. You don’t have any right to say anything about my relationship with Taehyun,” he cut me off.

I gulped and silence fills the air awkwardly. We just sat there without a word until our drinks are empty and left to a different ways. Maybe Kris wants to visit Taehyun? I sighed. I’m such a loser.

+++

From: Kris

I’m on my way to ur flat rn. There’s sumthing I need to talk to u.

My heart beats fast with his text. What could be so important that he can’t say it on the text? I rarely spend my time with Kris anymore. He always busy with Taehyun. He also seems to be avoiding me. So I’m a bit excited with his text.

Not 15 minutes later, I heard the doorbell rang. I opened the door and greeted by the sight of the most handsome man in the world. Before I get too distracted, I smiled at him, “Come in.”

He shook his head. “No, there’s no need. I’ll just be quick with it.”

Slightly disappointed, I said. “Spill.”

Kris took a long breath, “I can’t hang out with you anymore. I thought I will say this in person instead of text it.”

“Huh?” I asked dumbly. My mind still processing what just he said.

“I can’t hang out with you anymore.”

“What?! Why?! Did I do something wrong?” I asked, shock with his statement.

“No... It’s nothing like that. But Taehyun said he’d like to spend more time with me and I can’t do that if I still hang out with you.”

I stared at him incredulously. “Of course you can! You can manage the time between your best friend and your boyfriend!”

Kris sighed and rubbed his temple awkwardly. “It’s not that easy. Taehyun forbid me to see you again.”

“Huh? Why?”

“He said he get jealous easily. He wants me to himself and you often come in between us. So I can’t spend my time with you anymore.”

My mouth gaped open. “When did I ever come in between you two?!” I rubbed my hair frustrated. I even rarely meet them now! How come I come in between them. “And you just let him control you like that?! Oh God, Kris! This is ridiculous! He’s being selfish and you just let him?!” It’s a rare occasion I said something so bluntly like this, but hell! That boyfriend of his is being too possessive!

“Hey! Don’t bad mouth my boyfriend!” he glared.

“Kris, you should open up your eyes! How come you let him control you like this?!”

“Because he’s my boyfriend! And you’re no one! So you can’t talk about him like that!”

I freeze. There’s hammer hitting on my heart mercilessly. There’s an uncomfortable silence for a moment before I asked slowly, “How could you say that, Kris?”

“Because that’s the truth! You’re no one! I just waste my time here. I’m off. Don’t you dare talking about my boyfriend again,” he said one last time before leaving me in the door without a glance back at me.

I closed the door slowly and let my body slid down in the back of the door. I curled up my knees and lowered my head, didn’t realize that tears already flowing from my eyes. My shoulders shaking furiously while I sobbing my heart out. I can feel my heart clenched painfully.

“Of course I’m nobody to him... I’m just a useless piece of ...” I whispered brokenly into the silence that fills my flat.

“What hurts the most is when your heart wants someone but they don’t want you. All you will be is just another fly on the wall or a speck of dust. You mean nothing to him.”

A/n

I personally think that the plot is too fast, but whatever *shrugged*

I hope this doesn't disappoint you. Thank you for reading. :)

Feedback and any constructive criticism is very welcome! ^^

-Intan-