Today is the twenty-fourth of October, two thousand and eleven. It has been exactly seventeen years since I am stuck in the body of this seventeen-year-old girl. She has grown into a beautiful young lady, as I have noticed, and to be honest, I am envious. Sure, if I were to get out of this body, my form would look exactly like her. Only, contradictory to my ‘sweet’ voice, I wear a crooked mask. Meanwhile, Soojung’s features make her look sweet and pretty, whereas her voice is quite harsh compared to mine.

I do not have an exact name, but I go by the name of Krystal, Soojung’s other name: the name she rarely uses to introduce herself. Today is her seventeenth birthday, and my seventeenth anniversary of being inside her body, controlling her at times. Call me an , but thanks to me, the pitiful girl is lonely with only her small family as her company. Do you know why she cried for no reason in class that morning, and acted as if nothing happened later? Yes, it is all me, controlling her thoughts and emotions, drowning her consciousness into another world temporarily.

Everything is not my fault, though. First of all, it is her fault for emptying her mind almost every day, and second, I am just searching for entertainment. As a spirit that is locked in the deepest part of her heart, I have nothing to do but scaring her, which does not seem to work anymore these days.

She touches the cold windowpane, sending frigid chills against my literally non-existent skin. It is true though – if anyone were to touch me, his or her fingers would pass through me. However, I share the same feelings – but not emotions – with Soojung. If her smooth skin touches something hot, I would feel my skin burning. However, if tears are streaming down her eyes like a river, I could choose to share her pain or stay inside her and do nothing, or even laugh at her feelings.

Feelings. One thing that pretty much differentiates Soojung and me, other than the fact that she is a mortal and I am a demon, ghost, spirit, whatever you call them. Funny, the group of people she calls society is mistaken for her as me. I have no feelings, and the human I am half-possessing right now could burst out crying at any moment. However, for someone who has feelings, she is strong, I must admit. Sure, she has broken down several times, but it was never serious.

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you,” I hear her sing. Her voice could have been pleasant if it isn’t for the soreness in it, destroying her actually sweet voice. “Happy birthday, happy birthday.” For the next few seconds, there is nothing but silence in the room. I frown and decide to reveal my soothing voice, completing the song for her.

“Happy birthday to you,” I sing, realizing that this is almost the first time I am actually better than the human. I smile in both pride and satisfaction, waiting for my voice to die down in her ears.

I could feel her shiver slightly, though she has probably gotten used to my sweet singing voice. She turns around, and I chuckle silently inside her. It has been seventeen years and she is still trembling in fear. To be honest, it is strange. It’s strange how I seem to be literally around her, when in reality, I am inside her, waiting to be unleashed.

“Soojung, honey?” I hear someone call outside the wooden door. The next thing I know, Soojung is now facing her mother, treating her like how any daughter would treat her beloved mother: polite, well-mannered, and all that. At least, that is what I get from Soojung’s environment. Her friends – or the people in her school – has always treated their parents like that, thus making the bipolar girl I half-possess nearly the same, though the Jung family’s relationship is much more awkward.

And the next thing I hear is ‘Doctor Kim’. I freeze inside her ribs, and if I were human, it is like my heartbeat is racing, my mind blank due to unexplainable panic. A week ago, I hear Mrs. Jung telling Soojung that she would be calling a therapist, psychologist, whatever they are called – to identify what is wrong with the mortal. Once they know that there are two souls in one body, they will call an exorcist to eliminate one – which would be me, obviously.

Then I would be banished from Earth, entering Hell again.

The so-called doctor, according to the girl’s vision, is actually more handsome than an average psychologist. That, however, does not really change my feeling of both hatred and fear towards him. I feel Soojung’s brain suddenly filled with a rush of annoyance after seeing him. I smirked: that must be my work. The normal Jung Soojung would never hate someone who genuinely tries to fix her.

I watch them argue for a few moments, with Dr. Kim – or Kim Jongin – giving brief, polite, and clever replies while the seventeen-year-old teenage girl tries to come up with a reply of similar quality, only getting dumber and dumber every time she opens , until she finally gives up. Though I have to admit that I – in mortal language – clicked my tongue in disgust when he mentioned being Soojung’s acquaintance. He gives a somewhat clever yet cocky impression on the two of us.

And I click my tongue again when Soojung immediately trusts him in a blink of an eye. Is there something about him, other than his decent appearance that captivates the girl immediately? Her mom tries for more than a decade to do so, but she has always failed, for Soojung does not really want to open up. The teenage girl is weird, but who made her so if it wasn’t for the extra evil soul that somehow ruined her sanity?

Now, the three of us – Soojung, Jongin, and I – are back in the mentally destroyed girl’s room. I secretly try to give her ual thoughts, but the sane part of her brain quickly refuses it, making me frown. I can tell that today isn’t going to be a really pleasant day, despite it being both Soojung’s and my birthday. I listen attentively to their so-called private conversation, keeping my ears alert in case Soojung decides to reveal a little bit about me.

I am right – Soojung boldly reveals everything she knows about me: Jung Krystal. I suddenly feel like a fire starts to burn around me, melting my soul little by little. I feel like my inexistent clothes are being torn slowly, exposing my , vulnerable self. I feel weak and exposed, and it’s about time that I start breaking down, shattering into pieces. This has happened when she was younger – and I could not help but feel extreme pain on myself. I could not stand it; I want her to stop right now!

“Keep your mouth shut, Soojung!” I hiss, feeling hot fire-like tears roll down my cheeks. I touch my ‘face’, and my fingertips feel burn marks on them. I scoffed, noticing how cold and harsh my voice was when I hiss at her, making me the same as the mortal.

The girl is completely dumbfounded, and the doctor seems to be looking around, trying to detect anything odd inside the small bedroom. He fails, of course, for I live inside of Soojung instead of lurking around the room, though I get out occasionally, making myself invisible. However, I have not done that in a couple of years, and here I am, behind the cage of ribs, right inside her pumping heart.

I see Jongin nodding as if he understands. "I don't know, but try to go against it. Don't stay quiet; reveal everything you know," he says, angering me more. Completely in rage, I keep on telling Soojung to shut up every time she reveals things about me. Soon, my face is nothing but crooked, and my soul is more than susceptible. “Ignore them,” Jongin says casually when I feel Soojung’s heart race, angering me even more. Thus I leave a message before being torn down.

“I can never forgive you for this.”