Word count: 1,346

Summary: Baekhyun needs reassurance from Chanyeol that he isn't as bad as he(and the rest of Exo) thinks he is.

“Chanyeol, am I a ?”

The lanky boy’s ears perks up at the mention of his name. His eyes trail from the computer screen before him to the general direction of where the voice had come from. The room is pitch black apart from the glow of the monitor which makes it almost impossible to make out anything past the frame of the bed. He squints his eyes and roughly sees the outline of a huddled form in the corner against the wall.

“What do you mean, Baek?”

“Exactly what I said. A . Am I, Chanyeol?” This time, his brows furrow deeply in thought, wondering whatever the matter was because it’s not usual for the older to call him by his proper name and not any of his other nicknames unless the matter was of something serious.

“Wherever did you get that from?”

“I’ve been told by the others. They say I’m insensitive when I make a joke.”

Baekhyun’s instincts had told him of the members’ dislike towards him and his witty remarks that they had claimed to be insults. Like that one time when they had been filming the first episode of Exo Showtime and one of the missions was to characterize every member by a distinctive feature of theirs. Baekhyun had taken the liberty to take the lead, hoping for his enthusiasm to rub off on some of the quieter members. Apparently, his remark on Kai’s and Tao’s unique skin tone had come off as rude by the others. Needless to say, after being called out for it by a group of them when they had wrapped things up, Baekhyun spent the whole ride back to the dorm in uncharacteristically mute silence.

There is a brief pause in which the gears in Chanyeol’s head starts whirring, finding for the right way to put his thoughts across.

“They’re right, aren’t they?” Baekhyun breaks the silence, noticing the conflicted look on the younger’s face that is partially illuminated from the glow of the monitor. He is glad that he’s hidden in the shadows because he could feel his face contort into an expression of hurt. Chanyeol’s silence speaks more than words.

Baekhyun had thought that by consulting Chanyeol about his suspicions of the other’s views on him, the younger would take his side. After all, Chanyeol has always been his confidante since the very beginning of their idol journey. Now, he was starting to regret ever saying anything because the truth hits him like a ton of bricks – yes, people do hate him for not being able to control the things that he spews. It pains even more knowing that the one person whom he is supposed to be able to lean on for support is going to turn his back on him now after the realisation that he is, in fact, a horrible person as a whole.

“You think so too,” Baekhyun says in a quiet voice as he swallows hard. It isn’t a question but a statement he believes is true.

“You’re not a all the time, Baek.” Chanyeol finally speaks up. Once the words have left his mouth, he realises that it hadn’t come out the way he had planned it to, but it was too late. The damage was done. The words were like little prickly needles to Baekhyun who feels tears pooling in his eyes. The thought that he is hated by virtually every person in the dorm makes him feel extremely vulnerable for some reason.

“Okay, yeah. You’re right.” He gives an offhanded reply in fears of giving away his true emotions.

Baekhyun slips completely under the duvet and lies on his side, facing the wall. A few hot tears finally escape and he opts for breathing through his mouth when his nose gets blocked by his restrained sobbing. He accidentally lets slip a strangled sob and quickly buries his face into the pillow to muffle any other sounds he might make.

“Baekhyun? Are you okay?” Chanyeol asks in a low voice that’s laced with worry as he peers at the heap of blanket.

Baekhyun hums in reply because he is pretty sure he’ll start crying aloud if he opened his mouth. Of course, Chanyeol knows Baekhyun better than anyone else. There was a reason why they were together for this long; from the training days to their idol life. Chanyeol knows Baekhyun inside out, sometimes even better than the latter knows himself.

The younger shuts down the computer, letting darkness engulf the room they shared. Thank god, Xiumin and Tao were outside watching tv, which meant that the couple had the privacy.

Baekhyun panics when he feels the mattress sagging behind him, knowing it’s his boyfriend coming to comfort him. But he doesn’t want the latter to see him this way. He’s clearly overreacting, being too emotional.

“Baekhyun, please don’t cry.” Chanyeol’s deep voice is usually able to soothe him but it does nothing to calm him down now. If anything, he starts to cry harder, even letting out an audible choked sob that resonates in the deafeningly silent room.

When he doesn’t reply, he feels a pair of long arms coming around his waist and then he’s being pulled out the duvet and sinking back into an embrace. Large fingers start to thread through his brown hair.

“I-I don’t mean to be a . Sometimes I j-just say things without thinking but I really don’t mean them,” Baekhyun mutters through sobs that becomes progressively heavier. Chanyeol knows how the older had built up walls because of his past of being bullied. Chanyeol used to be annoyed at the fact that Baekhyun was an insensitive little prick but then he came to know that the latter was just the way he was because it became some sort of a defense mechanism. Underneath all the façade, though, is a boy with a big heart.

“Shh, baby, I know,” Chanyeol whispers in his ear. “I know you. Byun Baekhyun is the most caring and sweetest person I know. You just have to find a way to show it.”

He stops carding his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair and moves to gently wipe the tears away with his thumb. Baekhyun turns to bury his face in his boyfriend’s chest, only to blush hard when he comes face to face with rippled chest muscles instead of fabric. Oh yeah, Chanyeol walks around the dorm without a shirt on.

Baekhyun’s tears subside to hiccups and he brings his arms to wrap around Chanyeol’s torso. Baekhyun presses his ear against his boyfriend’s chest to listen to his heartbeat. Chanyeol nuzzles his chin against Baekhyun’s hair as he takes Baekhyun’s hand in his own and laces their fingers together.

“What do I do now?” Baekhyun asks after awhile.

“Hmm. You could start small. Maybe, sometimes, before you speak, give it some thought. If you think it’ll hurt the person’s feelings, then you should probably keep it to yourself. If you think someone isn’t happy with what you’ve said, you should talk it out with them so they don’t misinterpret the meaning of your words. I’ll help you out. If you say something mean without basis, I’ll tell it straight to you.”

Baekhyun scrunches his nose in thought before his lips curl at the corners. “You always know the right things to say.”

“I know,” Chanyeol smiles warmly at his lover in his arms. He leans down to press a loving kiss to Baekhyun’s forehead through his bangs.

“You make me a better person, Yoda,” Baekhyun mumbles as he buries his face back into Chanyeol’s side. He pecks on the exposed skin and hugs Chanyeol a little tighter.

“That’s what relationships are supposed to do. If we love someone, we’d try to bring out the best in them.”

“Why are you so smart all of a sudden?”

Chanyeol gives a deep rumble of laughter, “I have always been smart, Byunbaek. It’s just you who realised it late.”

There is a brief pause before Baekhyun whispers through a smile, “Thank you for seeing the best in me.”