Past or Present?
Love Again - Baekhyun"___-ah, please... Please take me back! I know I was stupid and I was a bastard, but I've never ever stopped loving you! I'm so sorry for breaking your heart, I really am. I just want a second chance to prove that I can be the one for you. Please..."
He stood in front of me at my front door, crying. He wanted me to take him back, but he'll never understand how much he hurt me.
"Baekhyun, stop crying. You shouldn't even be aloud to cry. YOU'RE the one that hurt ME, and you're heart-broken? Do you even know how I feel right now?"
"No, I don't, I'll admit that. But I want you to know that I will never ever make you feel that way again if you give me one more chance! ___, I love you so much-"
"STOP SAYING THAT!" a tear ran down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away, "You don't love me. If you did, you wouldn't have left me in the first place! Baekhyun, you didn't even say anything. You just.. You just left. All you said was 'It's over.' When you were gone, I was so confused and hurt and angry. I was confused because I-I don't know what I did wrong-"
"You didn't do anything. I did everything wrong. You were always right ___-ah. Don't ever put the blame on yourself."
"Oh, I never did. You're the one who cheated on me and left me for another woman!" I was now shouting and crying. I can't believe after all he's done, I still have a soft place in my heart for him. I can't say that I want him back, but I can't say that I want him gone. I still love him, after everything he's done, I just can't help but to still have hope in us.
I walked towards the living room and sat on my comfy chair. I sighed as I brushed my hair back, trying to relax myself. He shortly followed but left the door open. He walked up in front of me and bended down to reach my level. He stared at me with his soft yet hurt eyes. I can tell he's being sincere about all of this, but I don't think I can trust him just yet.
"___-ah, I'm willing to do anything for another chance. Really, anything. I want you back. I need you back, baby. Please, can't we work this out? We've been through a lot of struggles, but we made it out of them, together. I really love you, I'm being serious."
What bothered me the most of what he said was the last part. It was all true. He was always there for me, and I was there for him. But things changed, and he was just hardly ever there.
"You're right. But things changed after you... After you found someone else. I felt replaced, unwanted, unloved. You never considered my feelings, never. I love you too, but after three years of unwanted pain, how could I easily forgive you?"
He dragged his eyes to the floor, looking defeated. A tear slowly rolled down his cheek. "I-I don't expect you to forgive me."
"Then why are you trying so hard!?" I said, sounding frustrated.
"Because I still think we have a chance! Sure, I was a total jerk, but I know that the spark we first had is still here, I know you feel the same way. You're just hiding it because you don't wanna forgive me that easily, and I understand that."
I fell silent. What was I supposed to say? Even if I chose to not give him a second chance, I would be hurting myself even more. If I do give him a chance, I'm scared that he might forget this whole situation and play me again.
"Look, I won't ever ever cheat on you. I just wanna be with you, only you." He sighed and looked straight in my eyes, "I-I broke up with the other woman. I was certain you'd give me another chance, but I guess not."
He got up from the floor and and dragged his head down. Wait.. Is he leaving!?
"B-Baekhyun, are you leaving?"
He looked at me and gave me a very small grin filled with pain, "I have no choice. I understand that you're just not ready to forgive me yet. So, I guess I should just-"
"No." I suddenly blurted out. What am I doing? Am I actually gonna forgive him?
"W-what?"
"I-I said no." I stood up and took a small step towards him.
"___, you don't need to do this if you don't-"
"I want to forgive you. I have to. I feel like I shouldn't, but I can't help it. I love you too much to lose you again. I trust you, I really do. Please, don't leave me again. Please stay."
He looked at me and shot me a tiny smile. He looked straight into my eyes, "I'm so happy that you forgave me. ___-ah, I love you so so much."
Tears made their way down my face. Why am I crying? Am I choosing the wrong path?
I wrapped myself in his warm, comfortable... Untouchable embrace? I reached for his face, and my hand just passed through it. "B-Baekhyun... W-why can't I-"
"N-noona? Why are you crying?"
My brother just came back from his work. He closed the front door as he slowly approached me.
I turned around, wiped away my tears and looked at him.
"Oh i-it's nothing. I'm just very happy, that's all."
He looked confused. "Why are you so happy all of a sudden?"
I furrowed my eyebrows. "I just made up with Baekhyun." I smiled and turned around to face him. To my surprise, he wasn't there. He was... Gone?
He approached me and put his hand on my shoulder. "Noona, are you sure you're alright?"
I stayed silent. What just happened? A second ago, I was conversing with him, and the next, he disappeared into thin air. "H-he was here. I swear he was! He was here and I talked to him!"
I turned around. He looked a bit.. Guilty. He sighed and looked to the floor. For some reason, he couldn't look into my eyes. What happened?
"Is there something you're not telling me?"
He looked up and widened his eyes. He sighed again and looked me straight in the eyes. He just stared at me.
"Um, hello? Earth to Minwoo? Respond please!" I waved my arms in his face. He gently grabbed them and slowly dragged them back down. Now he just looked sad. Why won't he tell me what's wrong??
"N-noona... Baekhyun is... D-dead..."
I looked at him, my eyes popping out of my sockets. "No. No, this can't be... I talked to him, I swear! I saw him with my own two eyes!" My eyes became teary.
"___, it was just your imagination. Baekhyun died three years ago, when you guys... ended... things... He was so depressed that he... He t-t-took away his own l-life..."
A tear gently made it's way down my pale face. "N-no! Minwoo he's not dead! You're kidding aren't you? AREN'T YOU!?"
He held onto my shoulders, "___, I'm so sorry, but no, I'm not kidding."
I froze and dropped to the floor, crying my eyes out. Minwoo bended down and hugged me tightly. I can't believe he actually died... For me...
He came to make sure that things were alright between us... Before he was gone, for good.
'___-ah, I love you so so much...' Are now the words that are repeating in my head. I love him, and now I know, he really loves me too...
"I just want him to come back..." I sobbed onto Minwoo's shoulder.
"Please..."
THREE YEARS "LATER":
I still haven't been able to sleep well, to eat well, to speak well... I'm really nothing without him. I haven't seen him for over three years, he never came back. I've been having dreamless nights, he'd never come to visit me. I was hurt by that. I never even got to say goodbye...
My brother had been a bit concerned about me, so he told me to go outside and take a walk to get some fresh air. I denied it at first, but finally gave in because I knew how bad he felt for me and how much he cared.
It was the middle of autumn, so I took my black beret and wore my maroon scarf with my brown coat that reached to the middle of my thighs. To add some style, I wore some black tights and my maroon boots that went just under my knees.
I went downstairs and saw Minwoo. He smiled at me, "You look nice, noona." I smiled back, "Thanks little bro. Well, I'm off to take my walk. See you in about an hour!"
He waved at me, "Bye noona! Have fun!"
I smiled as I made my way outside the door.
I could feel that today is gonna be a great day. I didn't exactly know where to walk, so I just made my way to the nearest cafe. I walked in and inhaled; it smelt so wonderful. I went over to the counter and ordered a medium coffee with a shot of vanilla. I thanked the cashier, paid and went out to walk some more.
I took a sip and sighed happily, "This is so good." I decided to go to the park, since it was always empty on days like this. And also because it was 'our' favourite place to go.
While walking, I looked from side to side. I really forgot how beautiful the outside world looked like. I'm glad that Minwoo asked me to do this. I'm actually quite enjoying it, even though I'm alone.
As I was making my way to the park, I realized something... This scenery looks familiar. Too familiar. I stopped. I remember this place, but I can't really seem to put my finger on it. I turned, and saw an old couple cuddling on a bench near a river. They looked at me and the old lady winked then smiled, as if she knew me. Weird... They also seemed familiar...
Oh well, I decided to ignore it all, and continued walking towards the swing set. As soon as I turned around, I bumped into someone and fell down.
I fell head first, but it didn't hurt that badly. I propped myself on my elbow while rubbing the back of my head with my other hand. "Oww.." I closed my eyes in pain. "Oh my gosh I'm so sorry!" the person said.
That voice...
It can't be...
I opened my eyes and saw a hand. I took it and I immediately felt something tingling inside of me. The person pulled me up and I looked at his face. Oh my...
Before I could even say anything, he winced in pain and I realized I had spilt my boiling hot coffee on his sweater. "Oh my God I'm so sorry!! I'm such a klutz-"
"No no, it's fine! It's just a bit hot, it'll wash off anyways. And besides, I bumped into you..."
He looked exactly like him. He even sounded like him too! I don't even know how he's back, but as long as he's here right now and I can feel him, that's all that matters. But I couldn't just blurt out his name, it'd be too weird.
"... And I really don't regret it." He said and smiled at me. That heart-warming smile, how much I missed it. I wanted to hug him so tightly, but I couldn't.
I smiled back and blushed a bit. I suddenly widened my eyes.
Now, it hit me: This is where I first met him, three years ago. This is exactly what happened back then. What I wished for is actually happening. He's really back, but he doesn't know me yet. I get to have another chance...
"Are you alright?" he asked in a slightly worried tone. I looked up into his eyes, and I really had the urge to just wrap my arms behind his neck and pull him into a kiss.
"Um, y-yeah I'm fine. I guess I just hit my head pretty hard." I chuckled.
"Oh, yeah. I'm really sorry about that. Does it hurt?" he caressed my head, "No no! I'm fine! Don't worry about it." I gave him a reassuring smile. He smiled back, "Oh, how rude of me! I'm Baekhyun, by the way," he held out his hand, "and you are?" I slowly took his hand and I immediately felt that tingle again. I blushed at the contact of our hands and slightly ducked my head so he wouldn't notice. "I-I'm ___."
He smiled again, "Pretty name for a pretty lady." I looked up at him and he winked. He saw my slightly pink cheeks and laughed, "You look really cute when you blush, ___." He let go of my hand and gently pinched my cheek. "Thanks, I guess." We both laughed and I looked to the ground.
"___-ah?" I missed the way he said my name. It sounded so good coming from him. "Y-yes?" I slowly raised my head. He took my hand and intertwined his fingers with mine, "Do you mind if I buy you a new coffee?"
Our eyes met once again and I felt nothing but pure happiness. I can't believe this is happening. With a big smile on my face, I replied, "Not at all, Baekhyun-ssi."
We turned and started to walk to the cafe. I swung his hand and he chuckled, "Please, call me 'oppa'." I looked up at him and he grinned at me. "Ok, oppa." We laughed and talked about our lives...
Now, every day, we'd meet each other at that very same park. We eventually started to go out, and it seems like he really changed. He never cheated, he never lied, he stayed loyal to me, and I did so too. I'm as happy as can be, and he is too.
Minwoo is also very happy for me, but it seems like I was the only one to remember what happened "three years ago". From now on, I'll make sure that never happens. I'll cherish him forever, until my last breath. But, something was kind of... Off. It all seemed like it was just a dream... But it was all real...
Right?
A/N:
Sorry if this , but I hope you liked it :) I know, angst fanfics are supposed to have sad endings, but I can't stand that, so I tried to keep it as happy as possible and I added a little "twist", I guess? Anyways, thank you so much for reading and love you all! Anneyong~ :D
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