The doorbell made Zitao stand up in annoyance, distracting him from his beloved extreme couching session. He adjusted his sweatpants - Zitao never really made the effort putting a shirt on when he was at home– and walked towards the front door of his cozy little apartment. One last groan escaped his lips before he opened the door, revealing a – god dammit – good looking young man. “Hello Mr. Huang. My name is Wu Yifan and I’m your personal vacuum cleaner salesman.” Usually Zitao would have shut the door in the salesman’s face by now but this Wu Yifan person wore ing tight beige pants and a white dress shirt and he looked like a freaking -Manga character. Despite that glorious view Zitao still had some sense left and he knew that these salesmen could be like a leech and he wasn’t that fond of that. He wasn’t like Yixing-ge who lived in the apartment on the opposite side.

“Am I supposed to let you in now?” Yifan nodded, flipping his golden hair while eying the young boys’ torso and Zitao could have sworn he heard something along the lines of ‘You can let me into your pants too’ coming from the male outside his door. After some seconds of silence and a lot of winking from the salesman Zitao rolled his eyes and moved aside, letting Yifan in. The salesman was to Zitaos surprise slightly taller than him and had really huge hands. Zitao noticed that as the male walked pass him with a Chanel - please, how cheap - briefcase and a suitcase he dragged behind him. Zitao wasn’t entirely sure whether Yifan was here to actually trying to sell a vacuum cleaner to the young man or he was just here to him. Zitao followed Yifan into his living room but stopped at the door frame.

“Let’s get this over with, shall we? I don’t have all day.” Yifan raised an eyebrow and looked behind him. There was some overly dramatic drama on TV, the couch table looked like a bomb exploded and on a second glance Zitaos hair looked like some birds nested in there. “Sure, Mr. Huang.” Yifan sat down on the couch after pushing some empty chip bags and a soda can on the floor and began to unpack his little suitcase. Zitao left Yifan to adjust everything while he got something to drink for them not bothering with any snacks because there were already enough of that on the table. On one hand Zitao cursed school for canceling classes today but on the other hand he couldn’t thank them more because Yifan was so his type. Zitao came back into the living room with their drinks and sat down beside the other man. Zitao put the straw from his drink into his mouth and waited for the other male to begin with what he was here for in the first place. “Aren’t you cold, Mr. Huang? You might want to put a shirt on.”

Zitao looked down at his bare chest and then back at Yifan. “No, I’m comfortable thank you very much. Now start or I’ll , uhh I mean kick you out.” Zitao closed his eyes cursing himself. Yifan let out a laugh put his drink on the table and stood up to start with his presentation. “Alright Mr. Huang. I’m going to show you the newest item of our summer collection. This vacuum cleaner is coming in 5 trendy summer colors and if you buy one today you are getting 20% off, isn’t that awesome?” Zitao wanted to laugh at the stupid presentation and cry at the same time because of Yifans ing attractive voice. He thought about the other’s words. Should he just buy that stupid thing so that gorgeous piece of meat could walk out of his depressing life just as fast as he walked in? Zitao was aware of the fact that he was probably the most ual frustrated person on earth – or he was just freaking desperate.

“And how much does it cost in the end then, Mr. Wu?” Yifan ignored the way the other male spotted his name into his direction and just continued with his work. “With the 20% sales you can get this brand new vacuum cleaner for only 799$!” Now Zitao really wanted to cry because there was no way he could buy that stupid thing to get the other male out of his apartment, even better out of his life. “How on earth do you think I can afford that stupid thing, huh? I’m still a student, do you think I poop money or something, old man?” Yifan was a bit taken aback from the other ones outburst but remained calm nonetheless . “I’m very aware of the fact that you’re still a student sir, but of course I have also the perfect solution for this. You, Mr. Huang, can pay in monthly rates!”

It wouldn’t hurt to kick the other in the balls, would it? Zitao squeezed the bridge of his and let out a strangled sigh. “I don’t think this is going to work Mr. Hot-vacuum-salesman. You and I know perfectly that your job is just plain stupid and your life must be really boring because you’re still doing this job so I ask you friendly to leave now, alright? I’ll even walk you to the door.” Zitao stood up, picking up his muscle shirt that was lying on the floor beside the couch. He suddenly felt really exposed in the others present and waited with his arms crossed in front of his chest for Yifan to pack up his things, which the other did with a sigh. “You’re really hard to get, Mr. Huang. It must be hard to be a student nowadays, because you seem really stressed out.” Oh my god how old is that freak. Zitao remained silent and just watched the other walking pass him and to the front door, opening it but not leaving. “You know Mr. Huang, I really think you need a new vacuum cleaner, your floor is kind of dirty.”

Zitao gasped like a disney princess. “Who do you think you are?” Before Zitao could go on with his rant, Yifan smiled and cut him off. “I’ll get you next time, future Mrs. Wu. See you tomorrow!” And with that the door closed.

5 years later

“We don’t need a new one, Yifan! We have already 30 at home!” Zitao was once again ranting about Yifans vacuum cleaner obsession. “But we don’t have this one! That’s the new vacuuminator 3000 in pearl blood orange! And you are no one to talk. I am not the one with a whole wardrobe full of identical Gucci bags!” Yifan literally shoved the said vacuum he was currently holding into Zitao’s face. “They are not all the same Yifan! And my bags are not stupid! And that stupid thing is red not blood orange!” Said man rolled his eyes at Zitao and started to walk towards the checkout. “Shut up, Mrs. Wu.” Zitao sighed, watching his husband pay with a happy smile which led to an involuntary grin on his own face. Stupid Yifan.