yifan isn’t sure what’s more cute; zitao curling against his side or zitao mumbling his name while sleeping.

christmas is in exactly ten days and this will be the first year that yifan gets to spend it with zitao. together. it still sounds a bit funny both on his tongue and in his head, but being together with zitao is something that creates bubbles all throughout his body; from his head to his toes. yifan pulls the small fur blanket over zitao’s shoulders and goes back to the sketch pad in his hands.

it’s supposed to be zitao’s christmas present this year, yifan had been working on it since october and was planning to have it completely finished before the 24th. it’s a portrait of himself and zitao, only their backsides are shown, but it’s notably them. they’re walking on the beach with little white waves of sea foam tickling their ankles. the sun is out and the sky is a light blue with wispy white clouds and dark brown silhouettes of birds flying. it’s simple, but yifan likes it and hopes zitao will like it too because their relationship in a whole is simple. the painting depicts their relationship in a way.

zitao lets out a soft sigh in his sleep and yifan’s nose crinkles as he smiles.

five days before christmas and yifan takes zitao shopping in the streets of hongdae. they don’t seem so conspicuous with their arms linked as they blend into their group of friends; jongdae, luhan, sehun, and minseok. it’s last minute christmas shopping and yifan can see luhan falling into a similar pace with minseok and jongdae is teasing them. he’s glad that there’s sehun on the other side of tao with their arms linked too or else jongdae might be teasing them instead. zitao pulls his arm away for a moment to point towards a small clothing store that sells fedoras and yifan keeps his arm up so that zitao can relink their arms.

there really are different types of fedoras all lined up on the colorful christmas decorated shelves. zitao tries on several but it’s a bright red one that catches his attention. yifan thinks it looks a little  silly on his boyfriend, but zitao’s smile is so adorable that he buys it without fail.

when they leave the store and get most of their shopping done, the sun starts to set and jongdae pulls them all aside to eat ddeokbokki even though yifan protests but zitao feeds him so there isn’t much to complain about. sehun pours them drinks and yifan smiles when zitao discreetly kisses him behind the ear. his lips are warm in the cold night air and his breath tickles when he pulls away and smiles shyly at yifan. the older’s cheeks turn a light flush of pink but it’s hard to tell because of the low light and the fact that it’s so cold his cheeks would have been colored either way. it feels like they’re lost in their own little world, yifan completely forgets about the others and he presses closely more to zitao’s side and all he can feel is zitao and he wishes that it would be like this all the time.

two days before christmas and zitao is standing above yifan on the couch, trying to hang up their stockings. yifan thinks it’s silly to hang them above the couch, but zitao thinks it’s different and unique but that’s just because yixing and joonmyun hang their stockings over their couch and yifan knows how much zitao looks up to those two.

“ge, they’re like the perfect couple.”

“have you ever seen the way joonmyun hyung looks at yixing ge?”

“i want something like that.”

yifan thinks zitao is so silly about it because he does have something like it, but he supposes it is hard to see it on the outside. yifan sees it though, he realizes the way he stares at zitao, notices how enamoured he is with the younger and not to brag, but he thinks they’re a much better looking couple than yixing and joonmyun.

just as zitao finishes hanging up his own red velvet stocking, yifan slips a cold finger into his sock and zitao yelps, nearly falling from the couch. yifan laughs as zitao snaps at him before tackling him and the two end up wrestling on the floor which ends up in them kissing and touching and becoming short of breath. yifan doesn’t think he needs oxygen anyways when he can breathe in the scent of zitao and live off of that.

and he thinks he’d really die if he couldn’t.

christmas day is spent by waking up to butterfly kisses from zitao’s long lashes and then a small breakfast before going to spend the day with all their friends at chanyeol’s who had invited them to hang out.

they end up playing christmas games until chanyeol pulls out a box of pepero and suggests they switch to couple games instead. yifan thinks it’s a little unfair because not everyone is in a relationship here but zitao looks ecstatic and agrees it sounds like a fun game. to make things more fun, baekhyun pulls out a santa hat and writes their names on slips of paper; that way it’ll be a mystery as to who you’ll play the game with. yifan doesn’t think that’s interesting, but baekhyun teases him and assures him that it’s just a game for fun.

except when yixing and sehun get paired together and yixing doesn’t seem to understand the concept of the game so he ends up kissing sehun and joonmyun is scandalized while everyone else laughs their asses off. zitao isn’t laughing as hard as yifan would expect but it doesn’t matter because he pulls his name anyways and they end up demolishing the pepero in their own kiss. jongin calls them cheaters but they win anyways because no one else is as lucky as they are.

they all have dinner together and the atmosphere is light and carefree. there’s the small secret santa gift exchange and yifan ends up with a set of new brushes courtesy of kyungsoo and zitao gets a bright red scarf from sehun. red must be zitao’s new favorite color or something because he just seems to keep getting it, but yifan doesn’t mind because it looks pretty on him and the scarlet hue stands out in the snow covered city.

they all return home after the gift exchange and zitao lingers to talk to sehun, yixing, and joonmyun for a bit and then before the night officially ends, yifan has his fingers braided with zitao’s as they walk home.

it’s snowing and as they pass through the town square, zitao suddenly stops and looks up at yifan. he’s wearing the red scarf he just got from sehun and there are light snowflakes padding against his eyelashes and zitao has never looked more beautiful to yifan. it’s late and there isn’t anyone around so yifan brushes his fingers against the white flesh of zitao’s face before cupping his cheek and kissing him deeply.

zitao doesn’t kiss back.

it’s yifan’s first christmas with zitao as a couple. it’s their first christmas together and zitao’s cheeks are becoming red and tear stained, yifan can feel the warm drops on his own face when he pulls away from zitao. as he slides his hand away, his fingers rub onto the fabric of the scarf draped around zitao’s neck and suddenly he understands.

yifan with his arms linked to zitao’s.

yifan buying zitao a red fedora.

yifan getting fed by zitao.

yifan watching zitao hang stockings.

yifan playing the pepero game with zitao.

yifan waiting for zitao as he stays behind to talk.

yifan kissing zitao.

zitao not kissing back.

“i’m sorry,” is all that comes out of his lips before he turns away and heads back down the road, leaving yifan alone with his realization in the snow.

five minutes - five minutes is all yifan wants to correct this mistake. if he could go back five minutes and actually stop zitao and say something to him instead of letting him go then maybe he wouldn’t have this empty hole boring into his heart. but he doesn’t and instead he returns home to find a drawing of two simple people that are not together.

miracles in december do not happen. why should they only happen in december anyways? yifan thinks miracles don’t happen at all.

zitao and sehun linking arms.

zitao and sehun sharing a red scarf.

zitao and sehun feeding and pouring drinks for each other.

zitao and sehun hanging stockings and giving each other that love zitao has always wanted.

zitao and sehun playing the pepero game together.

zitao and sehun leaning against each other as they talk.

zitao and sehun kissing.

zitao and sehun together.

~~~~~

hahahahahah it was almost fluff, but no, i was like no. miracles in december isn't even a fluffy song.