Chapter Four

Their night had passed in a peaceful and tense meeting, dinner plates full of food from Siwon’s housemaid’s cooking. It was delicious, and it was enough to fill up Kyungsoo’s peculiar day at ease.

His mind still couldn’t wrap around the idea of what had happened today. It all felt like it escalated too quickly and unlikely, especially that moment they set foot at the threshold of his uncle’s grandeur house.

God, he looked very different.

The issue wasn’t muttered even once, and everyone seemed to be relieved of that.

His face was sunken until his cheekbones outshone his gaunt face, skin leathery and slick from endless sweat. Kyungsoo could not fathom what kind of a disease would let that happen to his perfectly healthy uncle, but what he saw was living proof.

Only at dinner did he notice the other things: his wrists were nothing but bones and tight skin, veins blue against his milky, pale skin. He was unbelievably frail, like he had been sick for years and was in the brink of death, but Kyungsoo gave light as he noticed how he moved.

Still and calculated albeit his evident slowness.

Still alive.

He could almost feel it pulsating as he passed on bowl after bowl of food, and silently watched him eat. It was a bit heavy to watch, seeing him struggle a bit at digesting his food, but Kyungsoo saw how much he tried, and that broke his heart.

Where muscles used to be, now it was skin and bones. Where his handsome face had been, now it was only cheekbones and hollow eyes. Where his strength had been, now it was only weakness and death.

Kyungsoo tried his very best to not entertain the idea.

“So, anything I’ve missed with you guys?” Siwon said after a formal conversation with his sister and her husband about bank system and traffic. Baekhyun glanced up from his food, surprised by the sudden addressing.

In which Baekhyun gave a cheerful smile. “I won a singing contest, and I’ve been invited to sing at a game at school. Nothing much, really.”

Siwon gave a proud nod, as if Baekhyun was a six year-old who found his first Easter egg.

When Kyungsoo did not follow up his brother’s response, Siwon gave an encouraging call. “Kyung?”

Kyungsoo looked up from his own plate, his startling eyes trying to depict that he wasn’t aware that he was included at the conversation, and stared. He tried to consider telling his uncle about that one day from his extended art class where their teacher unceremoniously walked in and confidently told them that it was their next subject to draw – but hesitated.

It wasn’t as grand as Baekhyun’s was, so he thought.

“I made you a painting,” he blurted out, primarily because it was the only thing to say.

He couldn’t talk about his days at school, because any of it wasn’t great. He couldn’t talk about his boring life at home, drawing away whatever he finds acceptable, but that would make his uncle differentiate him from Baekhyun’s teenage-filled life.

He could tell him about Minhyuk’s ridiculously disastrous snoring, but decided that it wasn’t the perfect day to crack that comedic joke (he wasn’t much of a joker, anyway).

Siwon blinked in surprise, a gentle smile touched in his gaunt face. “That’s so thoughtful of you, Kyung.”

Kyungsoo could only nod, deciding that there wasn’t anything to tell at all. Maybe there was, but Kyungsoo wouldn’t really say it anyway. Above anyone, he thinks his uncle was the only person who understood that it was okay; that it’s okay to be silent and rage on alone, that it’s okay to be that way – because maybe that’s what makes it okay, that someone knows – that someone is aware.

Siwon gave a sigh that was both happy and tired. Today exhausted him, that much was obvious, and Kyungsoo’s mother called it a day.

“You two can get some rest,” Siwon said to the two boys. “We’ll handle this.”

Baekhyun gave a respectful blink, hesitant.

“Baek,” Siwon said again, and that was that.

Kyungsoo watched as Baekhyun disappeared to a hall that leads to his own bedroom that had been unused since the last time they visited. Siwon had made sure everyone gets a room, so that explained the unnecessary numbers of rooms and the spiraling and confusing hallways.

He didn’t know why he stopped, but it was too late before Siwon noticed.

“Something wrong, Kyung?”

Both of his parents gave a cautious look at him mid-way from piling up the dishes. Kyungsoo noticed this but gave them no attention as he deliberately waited for the both of them to disappear behind the kitchen counter.

“My… my painting’s in your room,” he said, voice almost inaudible from the commotion his parents were making. Siwon nodded and smiled.

“Thank you for that, Kyung. I’ll make sure to look at it later.”

That was enough for Kyungsoo and nodded, bidding his good night’s so lowly that it sounded like it was meant for himself. He disappeared behind the door of his own bedroom and leaned against it with an exasperated sigh.

It was dark inside save from the wall lantern that was dim at the far side of his room, close to where his bed sat idly and invitingly. He remembered his first night in here way back when he was six. He was too small to be in the bed, so he had to drag Baekhyun inside and force him to sleep beside him.

That usually worked out between six year-old Kyungsoo and seven year-old Baekhyun, but now as they grow to their teenage selves, they couldn’t help but quarrel over little things.

That made him chuckle, the thought of him and Baekhyu